He wanted to breathe fresh morning air. He wanted to feel the grass beneath his feet. To feel the warmth of the sun. To see the stars sparkle all over the night sky. To enjoy the sound of rain drops crashing against his window. To joke around and laugh together with his friends. To sing with all his might and dance with all his passion. He wanted to live.

So why was he was refused? His own body denied the life that was once given to him all those years ago. His life was slowly ending, and there was nothing anyone could do to stop it.

White walls closed in on him. Shou had never been claustrophobic, but he felt like he was suffocating. Though the agony in his chest was pretty much nonexistent by now; the strong pain-killers was famous for their side-effects. The hallucinations that walked hand-in-hand with a pain-free existence were never a fun experience.

Memories flooded his drug-numbed mind, filling him with the strange feeling of nostalgia. Happy, sad, funny and loving thoughts blended together and made his lips pull into a weak smile.

For as long as he could remember, Shou had known that his heart had an expiration date. Though he had exceeded any expectations of his lifespan by a mile, he knew, knew... He wouldn't last much longer.

A miracle, the doctors called him. His will to live is as strong as any mountain. But it was not strong enough. His determination could never win over a weakened heart. Some day it would cease to beat, stop dead in his chest. He would breathe his very last breath, and no air would ever fill his lungs again. His body would grow stiff and could, then embraced by fire and reduced to ash.

Someday, he would die. That knowledge had been within him since his first heart operation. And he had accepted it. He had even been at peace with it. But now, with his failing organ beating slower and slower, terror gripped him with cold claws.

Chained to a disinfectant-smelling hospital bed, broken by nothing more than his own limitations, Shou felt tears of fear threaten to fall. He sluggishly blinked them back. He hadn't shed tears since he was twelve. Not since he decided to live to the fullest with each passing day, never having a single regret. He should have known the bitterness would catch up with him anyway.

The door opened, its creaking hinges alerting the pale boy. Shou wanted to turn his head so he could distinguish the visitor, but his body refused to obey his command. So he lay lifeless, waiting for the person to reveal themselves.

A badly suppressed sob reached Shou's ears. His sight was cloudy and head disoriented, but he managed to make out a mop of blond hair as the visitor sat down by his bedside. A light pressure on his hand. Striking blue eyes that closely resembled Shou's own looked at him.

Kaoru?

Shou was unable to make out anything else, but he didn't need to. Shou would have recognized his brother no matter how far gone he was. He got an sudden urge to smile. Of course Kaoru would come to see him. His twin would have traveled to the end of the world for Shou. Especially now when his health was deteriorating.

When he was... dying.

No. He refused to think like that. He had pulled through before. This was no different. Then... why did his stomach tighten so painfully?

A sniffle. "Shou?" Kaoru's voice was so tiny it was barely audible. Shou willed his eyes to focus. Impossible. He remained half-blind to everything around him.

"Ah... ru..." His pathetic attempt at saying his brother's name was rewarded by a tighter grip on his hand.

"It's okay, you're fine..." Kaoru's voice broke, crushing Shou's frail belief that his twin maybe - maybe - was right. "The operation was successful... Everything is fine."

Operation? When... Wait... How had he even ended up here in the first place? His last memory... He couldn't even recall that. He searched his memory harder. Nothing came to mind.

He wanted to ask, wanted to press every bit of information out of his brother's mouth, but his strength had all but left him. Even his eyelids were too heavy... He felt them slowly closing against his will.

Kaoru had fallen silent, but Shou felt that the hand that covered his own shook. With all his remaining will, Shou weakly squeezed his brother's hand, in the hopes of being at least a little reassuring.

Another sob reached his failing ears. Every sound made it seem like he was underwater, his ear congestion growing by the second. And... was that a fish swimming by? Damn those drugs.

Shou's eyes slipped shut and then he knew no more.


This has been laying around on my computer for some time now, and when I found it again, I decided to fix it up and post it. I hope you liked it!

I have no intentions of writing another chapter, as inspiration tends to leave me after a thousand words.. So it's up to you whether Shou lives or dies, but judging by the title... I know, I'm heartless. And, yes, I do spell "Shou" instead of "Syo". It's a habit. :3

EDIT: Fixed up some errors that bothered me to no end.

Thank you for reading! Reviews are always appreciated! :)