Disclaimer - I own nothing you recognise.
Written for the Stretch Your Boundaries Competition - Round 2. Prompts used - Memories / You'll never understand / I wish I could be who I used to be.
Written for the Disney Character Competition - Simba
Written for the Write All The Ships Challenge - Remus/Sirius
Written for the Spell/Charm/Curse Competition - Muffliato
Written for the Animal Competition - Cougar
Word Count Without A/N - 769
We Have Tonight
Remus opened the door, looked around for a minute, before closing it again, locking it and warding it as he did so. Had anyone been watching, muggle or wizard alike, it was too dark for anyone to have seen the black dog squeeze through the gap before the door shut. Remus took a deep breath, before turning to look into the eyes of the man he once loved, the man he still loved, more than life itself.
Sirius stood in front of the fire, his eyes still sunken, his face gaunt.
"Hey," he whispered, his voice still throaty from lack of use. He may have been free of the prison for almost a year, but most of that year had been lived as a dog, so he hadn't had much chance to speak.
"Hey yourself," Remus replied, moving passed him to enter the small kitchen, setting about making tea and a sandwich for his guest. He had only been home from Hogwarts for two days, had only just that day done some shopping, so Sirius was lucky to be getting anything at all. He picked up the tray, taking it into the living room and setting it on the table between two worn chairs.
"Sit, eat," he told Sirius as he picked up his own mug of tea. Sirius did as he was told, wolfing down the sandwiches in a way that almost made Remus laugh. In that moment, he reminded Remus of the eleven year old boy he had sat with at the Gryffindor table all those years ago, reveling in the freedom of not being hexed for eating his food too quickly.
When Sirius finished eating and had picked up his own cup, Remus finally found the courage to meet his persistent gaze.
"I missed you," Sirius told him quietly, so quietly, Remus almost didn't hear him.
"I... I missed who I thought you used to be, if that makes sense," Remus replied, not wanting to mention that he thought Sirius had been guilty for thirteen years, but also not wanting to lie.
"I understand. I wish I could be who I used to be," Sirius replied, a faint smile on his face.
"You know what I mean, Sirius."
"I do. Don't be so touchy, Moony."
Memories, long since buried seemed to assault Remus at the teasing tone, and he too smiled. He couldn't help it. Happier times spent by the lake, in class, even in detention whizzed through Remus mind.
"I can't stay here too long, you know," Sirius said, and the seriousness of the situation fell on both of them, a weight pressing down on them.
"I know. You can stay for as long as you need to though. I won't throw you out."
"Even if that means you getting arrested for harboring a wanted criminal?"
"Even then."
"Azkaban is not somewhere you want to visit, Moony, trust me on that if nothing else."
Remus watched as a shadow crossed Sirius' face at the mere mention of the place. "I know," he said quietly.
"You don't. You've never been there, Remus. You'll never understand the... how..."
"I know it's somewhere I never want to visit, Sirius. That's all I meant."
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you. That's the last thing I want to do. Merlin, but I'm messing this all up, aren't I?"
Remus chuckled as Sirius run a hand over his face. Another familiar movement.
"I came here, to tell you that I missed you, and, and that I love you, and even though it's been thirteen years since you last saw me, and I know you've probably moved on, and I'm not the same person, I just... I wanted you to know that I love you. I always have."
Remus frowned slightly as he stared at Sirius. How could he ever think that Remus had moved on?
"I love you too, jerk."
Sirius laughed, a nervous laugh that held incredulous relief and some disbelief.
"You're the only person I know who can tell someone they love them, and insult them, all at once."
Remus stretched between the two chairs, taking Sirius' hand in his own.
"I do love you, Sirius, I always will."
"I can't stay," Sirius repeated, making Remus wonder which one of them he was trying to convince.
"I know."
"And you can't come with me."
"I know. But we have tonight, and one day, when this is all over, we'll have forever."
Sirius smiled, squeezing the hand that held his own.
"We have tonight."
