HA!-Gender Bend

Characters:

Arnold = Ariel

Helga = Hank (Henry) Gerald Pataki

Lila=Leo

Olga=Odin

Rhonda=Randell

Curly= stays the same but her real name is Tamantha

Sheena=Sean

Patty=Patrick

Sid= short for Sidney (genderless)

Gerald=Geraldine

Brainy=Brianna

Nadine=Nathan

Eugene=Eugenia(real name look it up)

Phoebe=Preston

Harold=Harriet

Stinky= Sandy

Ruth=Rush

Side characters= Chocolate Gal, Ms. Simmons (Kathy)

Chapter 1-Pizza Thursday

Hank leaned against his locker in a crowded high school hallway. His magenta shirt contrasted next to his permanent scowl as he was born that angry .He crossed his arms impatiently, a small ribbon design bracelet peaked from his wrist. Years ago people stopped teasing him about it, now days people don't even mention it, usually it didn't end well.

When a dark haired, blue glasses teenage boy with a light blue sweater and slacks began to talk towards him, Hank let out a sigh.

"What took you so long, I am starving here." said Hank lightly slapping the glasses boy on the back of the head.

"I was in class, Hank" the boy said while fixing his glasses.

"Blah, Blah, blah. Let's get a move on, Preston or we will miss Pizza Thursday" said Hank as Preston placed his textbooks inside his locker.

"Coming" said Preston following Hank that was already walking away forcing Preston to walk faster.

Hank opened the doors wide of the cafeteria and took a big sniff.

"Smell that, Preston. The smell that actually makes this hell hole worthwhile." Hank said. When suddenly someone calling his name broke his cheese filled fantasies. He flinched turning around knowing very well whose voice it was.

"Leo" Hank mumbled under his breath.

"How was Biology class?" Leo asked

"You should know since you were there as well" replied Hank with a hint of disinterest.

Leo let out a small chuckle running his fingers though his ginger hair.

"That is true." Leo said, waving at Preston hello.

"Well this conversation has been all good and all but we got to go. Later" Hank said turning around and dragging Preston by the collar of his sweater.

The last thing that Hank could hear Leo was that they should hang out soon.

While both stood in the cafeteria line, Hank kept mumbling curses under his breath.

"Leo still bothers you. I mean it has been years since him…"Preston started to say before Hank quickly slapped Preston behind the head to keep him from saying anything else.

"No I am not. I just can't stand the sight of him. Always going around like he is Jesus or something. "said Hank

"Well he is the captain of every sport team, and the debate team, plus he is the Student Council president, and he volunteers in Soup Kitchens on the weekend." stated Preston as if he had the whole speech memorized.

"So he is smart, popular, and athletic…and cares about poor people. BIG FAT DEAL" said Hank

"Are you sure, it is not because of you know" Preston said while looking elsewhere.

Hank closed his eyes in annoyance as the cafeteria line progressed. Both grew quiet as they approached the cafeteria lady, till not a sound was spoken between the two boys. Hank with a satisfied expression walked out of the cafeteria line with his pizza tray walking forward without looking to where he was going.

When as on cue, he accidently crashed against someone slamming his try all over his magenta shirt he instantly grabbed the person when a pair of green eyes stopped Hank dead on his tracks.

"Ariel" said Hank chocking on a gasp. Ariel looked up at Hank's blue eyes lightly biting her lower lip before speaking.

"Hey, Henry" said the football headed girl.

"It is Hank" said Hank with his pretend angry tone.

"Hank" repeated Ariel softly.

"Yes, Hank. We all know who you are. Now, why don't you let go of my friend" someone interrupted forcing both Hank and Ariel to snap out of it.

All three of them turned to see who was talking even Preston who had stayed quiet the whole time. Hank sneered at the sight of the girl that interrupted. She stood with both hands at her hips .Her shoulder length hair black hair was in many braids and she wore a red shirt and black shorts.

"Well, well the great Lady G what do you want?" asked Hank in a mocking way.

"I won't repeat myself" she said. Hank rolled his eyes letting go of Ariel turquoise shirt. The second he did Geraldine grabbed Ariel to her side and glared at Hank that acted unamused. As Geraldine dragged Ariel away she whispered goodbye to Hank. While in the other hand Geraldine's eyes caught a glimpse of Preston and softly waved goodbye. Preston smiled and waved back.

Hank stood firm and screamed.

"Next time what were you are going …stupid football head." Then glanced at Preston that still haven't lowered his hand even after the girls were gone.

"Lower you hand idiot she is gone" said Hank and Preston quickly did. In order to turn the attention away from himself, Preston smiled to himself and said.

"You realize that was the first time you had spoken to Ariel since she came back?"

"What's you point?" sneered Hank crossing his arms looking at the cafeteria door.

"Nothing, just an observation" said Preston

"Why don't you go and make an observation with your chemistry set, Preston" said Hank hiding the blush on his cheeks.

Within minutes the lunch bell ran and the students slowly stood up and dumped their trash. Hank let out a sigh as he tried to remove the pizza chunks off his shirt.

"So much for Pizza Thursday" he mumbled to himself. Both of them walked out of the cafeteria with the crowd on way to their only class they hand together, History. Before both walked inside their history class, Hank stopped at the door, making Preston stop in front of him.

"Go ahead I'll be right back "said Hank and walked out. He sneaked out of the school and stood outside the school doors behind the large purple trashcans. He glanced around a few times before taking a small photograph from his black leather wallet .The photograph was of Ariel last time he had seen her before she left to be with her parents when they were twelve. He frowned thinking he needed a new photo now that Ariel was back. He looked down at his shirt and sighed in despair.

"Why must I be such a fool and say such uncultured words. The first time we lay eyes on each other after so many years "He pleaded to the universe when suddenly his thoughts were stopped abruptly by the sound of wheezing and the sudden Ashman inhaler sound. He closed his eyes rubbing the arch of his nose. Hank turned around stuffing the photo back to his wallet. The girl that stood behind him had brown hair into a medium size braid. She waved at Hank only irritating him more.

"Brianna, what a hell are you doing here? Don't you have class?" asked Hank while Brianna only blinked in response.

"Ok I get it, free period. Why don't you do that somewhere else…before I really get mad" Hank before stomping away.

"I am surrounded by idiots" He said.