Stephenie Meyer owns all Twilight.

Chapter 1 – Teeth

"So why are we doing this again?" Rosalie asked as she was painting her nails. Carlisle sighed, having to repeat it to the whole family again, for the 10th time.

"Because that you have spent nearly three thousand dollars on manicures and other related things, Alice has spent three hundred thousand dollars on shopping within a week, Jasper has ruined Nancy which got Edward very angry resulting to destroying half of the house, and Emmett flooded the house with a soda machine that he 'borrowed' from McDonalds." Carlisle took in a deep breath. "To make it more of a family event, Esme and I will take the job too. Bella will also help us; due to it is her own choice."

"Who's Nancy?" Bella asked, looking at Bella with an almost suspicious but curious look.

Edward looked down at the ground before mumbling back a reply that was loud enough for Bella to hear. "My piano." Alice gave a small smile while trying to make as if she found interest in the family room's window curtains.

"The first job is a bit of difficultly but we'll try it for a week. If it doesn't work, we'll move onto the next one." Carlisle announced, handing out papers to the family. "We're going to try dentistry." As soon as the words were out of his mouth, everyone began to have their own reactions.

"Finally!" Emmett shouted and ran to the garage to get something. Sighing, Rosalie followed him deliberately.

"Shopping!" Alice whispered to Jasper who ran into my office, rummaging through the drawers of my desk looking for the paper that had the family's sizes in clothes.

"Taking people's teeth out, how fun." Edward said sarcastically. "Let's go to the meadow, love." Bella smiled. Hand in hand, they strolled off to Edward's Volvo.

"They all took that well." Carlisle said before turning to Esme, smiling. She laughed then embraced him into a hug.

"Let's just hope this will end well."

XXX

"Wow." Bella stated, looking at the front office of the Cullen Dentistry building. The room was divided into two parts. Everything on one side was kid style, rainbows and anything to make kids comfortable. The other side was decorated with cool colors, with chairs and a bookshelf, to believe that it was meant for adults or teens mostly. She went over to a purple bean bag, sitting down. It completely sunk down, so instead of sitting in the position in a chair, Bella's face met her knees.

"Alice, don't you think you overdid it a little?" Edward questioned as he helped Bella out of her beanbag struggle.

"Nope. What do you think Esme?" Alice said, twirling around to peek at the clipboard that Esme was holding. The clipboard held the day's appointments. Thanks to lots of advertisement, and Carlisle's professional reputation, they had gotten the whole day booked.

"It's alright." Esme replied, looking up from the clipboard to take in the room's bright and cool colors.

At that exact moment Jasper walked into the front office wearing a duck costume. He stared at Alice then at the rainbows and bright colors. "BRIGHT COLORS, MY EYES!" Jasper screamed, while scrambling around the office, covering his eyes. Miraculously, without breaking anything, he made it outside and bumped into a guy wearing a giant banana outfit. Particularly, the guy in the giant banana outfit was Jacob. The song 'Banana Phone' came out of nowhere causing Jasper and Jacob to break into dancing.

"Can I join?" Alice asked cheerfully as she stepped outside, flipping the 'OPEN' sign on. Patients poured into the office, settling into the room carefully. Esme started calling patient's names and showing them where to go.

"See you later, love." Edward smiled Bella's favorite crooked smile as he kissed her forehead and left to help Carlisle. Smiling, Bella went along to help Esme with the filing and guiding the patients.

Edward's POV

Augh. This was a bit of a mess. Lots of thoughts ran through my head, most of them curious about the new dentist in town with his adopted children. I sighed, walking down the hallway to stop at stall number 4. The only things separating the stalls from each other are shelves in between. Within the stalls were your everyday standard dentist chair and tools stationed next to where the dentist would sit. On the wall, in front of the chair where the patient would reside for their teeth to be done, was a TV that they could use for entertainment if they liked.

Taking the folder off the counter, I flipped through its pages aimlessly. The door opened and in stepped a girl around the age of sixteen. She blushed when her eyes met mine. Taking a seat on the patient's chair, she waited for me to start patiently.

"Hello Charlotte. I'll start cleaning your teeth." I said, gesturing for her to lay down. She blushed even harder. I heard her thoughts; she was planning to flirt with me. How can you possibly flirt with a guy when he's cleaning your teeth? This could be amusing.

"Will this hurt?" Charlotte asked, making an expression that was supposed to be flirty and cute.

"No." My voice was flat, she was oblivious to it. While I turned around to get the tools, she unbuttoned some buttons on her blouse. I sighed, if this keeps up I would call in someone else. Trying my best to ignore all of this nonsense, I quickly finished cleaning her teeth. After she rinsed, she gave an attempt to kiss me. It failed. I had shoved a lollipop inside her mouth before she could. "Here, have a lollipop."

"Thanks." She mumbled before leaving the room, embarrassed.

Normal POV

A patient sat in one of the stalls, a man around the age of twenty. He was rather bored, wondering if this new dentist was any good at all at his work. Flipping on the television, he flipped through channels aimlessly. That is, until Rosalie walked in. His eyes were glued to her body, taking in its perfect curves.

'Augh. Disgusting' Rosalie thought as she stepped in, watching the man's expression. When she smiled, the man took that as an encouragement. 'Emmett will finally get to use his wrench on this one.'

'Sexy.' The patient thought as she smiled at him. He would've almost given anything at that moment to be with this mysterious dentist's adopted hot daughter. 'Wonder if she's single…' He mentally whistled.

"Hello. An assistant will be with you soon." Rosalie said, smiling sweetly.

'Yeah, with me soon. It'll be you, babe.' He laughed aloud, causing Rosalie to give him a purposely confused look. As he blushed, the door opened and Emmett entered. In his hands, completely hidden from the patient's view was a wrench. Emmett grinned like a child finding a huge stash of sweets. 'Holy shit.' Whispering something inaudible to human ears, Rosalie giggled before leaving the room. Alone, Emmett and the patient. Who would win? Dramatic music came on.

"Sup Dude." Emmett grinned as he took the wrench from behind his back. As the patient saw it, he gave a silent shriek of terror. "I'm supposed to take out some of your teeth that have cavities." The patient stared at Emmett as if he was joking but soon saw that he wasn't and began to slowly back up on his chair, getting far from Emmett as possible. "Open wide." Being forced, the patient opened his mouth, trying not to look at the wrench.

"Aren't you supposed to use a smaller tool?!" The patient cried, flinging his arms around.

"Yes." Emmett winked. "But this is what you get for messing with my Rose." Sticking the wrench inside the man's mouth, Emmett angled it and made sure it took hold of the cavity.

"Please have mercy! I'M SORRY!" Tears trickled out of the patient's eyes.

"Don't worry buddy, you won't feel a thing."

The last thing heard from the room was a patient shrieking in terror and pain on the top of their lungs.

XXX

"Did you hear something?" Carlisle asked, looking up from the computer. It sounded like a shriek of a little girl, barely audible to vampire ears. But he heard it. Bella gave a shrug, turning back to the shelf of folders. Esme looked at him worriedly. Rosalie didn't look at him at all actually; she seemed to be shaking… With laughter? "Rosalie?"

Putting on a straight face, Rosalie turned. "I didn't hear anything."

"Are you sure?" He raised an eyebrow. Walking over to him, Rosalie placed a hand on Carlisle's shoulder.

"I'm sure. Maybe you're just imagining things because you're getting old." She walked away, leaving him speechless. He looked back at Esme.

"I'm old?"

XXX

"So… Are you sure you aren't a banana phone?" Jasper asked. He and the guy in the banana suit was playing poker. People passed by, giving them weird looks on why they were playing poker in front of a dentist office. In total, it had been about an hour or two since they had began playing.

"I am sure!" Jacob screamed, flinging his cards up into the air. He jumped to his feet, followed by Jasper. "Why do you want to know so badly?"

"I mean like the song's so catchy!" Jacob sighed. Jasper sat while staring at Jacob like a child eager for a new story to be told.

"Fine, I'll teach you the banana phone secrets." Leaning over, Jacob whispered the secrets to Jasper. After hearing the secrets Jasper rolled onto the floor rolling with laughter and giggling. "What? You wanted to know!"

"You're right." Jasper took back his serious face. "Let's go get my banana suit!" The two of them scattered cards everywhere and stuffing huge poker chips into Carlisle's car before sprinting over to the costume store several blocks away.

XXX

It was lunch break at the Cullen Dentistry. The lunch break lasts for about an hour or two. Everyone was doing whatever they pleased. Carlisle was sulking in his office while Esme was trying to bribe him into coming out with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich along with some milk, even though he doesn't eat human food. Rosalie and Emmett mysteriously disappeared after the victim of the wrench incident had left the office. Bella was being taken out to lunch by Edward. Jasper and Alice had gone to buy more ice, since most of it was used on Emmett's patient's aching jaw.

"Carlisle, you know you like peanut butter and jelly sandwiches." Esme said, crawling closer to her husband's desk while pushing a plate with a peanut butter and jelly sandwich on it. Carlisle was sulking because he was called 'old' earlier. He was hiding behind his desk, at least making an effort to. Esme paused then reappeared with a glass of milk.

"I can't eat human food! It'll taste like dirt…" Carlisle frowned; he did used to like peanut butter and jelly sandwiches with milk when he was human. Peering from behind the desk, Carlisle saw Esme looking at him pleadingly. He sighed and was about to get out from under his desk when were interrupted as someone stomped into the office. It was the guy who had his teeth yanked out with a wrench.

"I'm going to sue you!" The guy screamed, pointing at Carlisle and Esme.

"May I help you?" Carlisle asked, popping his head out from behind the desk.

"Your son used a wrench to pull my teeth out! I'll sue you for…" He looked around the room, his eyes landed on the peanut butter and jelly sandwich. "The sandwich!"

"Here." Esme replied, handing him the sandwich. The patient took a bite of the sandwich and walked away, taking it with him. Esme turned to her husband.

"Maybe we should try another job…"

XXX

Author's Note: I hope you enjoyed it. (: Please review as they will make me and the Cullens happy : D