There was a shift in Tori as the time came, and Jade watched how her muscles seemed to tense but her posture seemed to relax at the same time. She became poised and confident, and the microphone fit in her hand like she had been born with it.
This Tori interested her.
This Tori was much more a predator than the prey she usually was, and it engaged the part of Jade that would always rather enjoy a fair fight over an easy kill. Yes, this side of Tori captured Jade every single time she met with it.
As the Latina took to the stage, she glanced in Jade's direction and held her gaze for a moment, before she was forced to watch where she was treading around the still-uncovered wiring from the lights and her eyes fell away.
Jade wondered if her face had shown her trail of thoughts or not, or if Tori only saw dislike regardless of what was really there after all this time. Probably the latter.
"Doesn't she look great in that dress? Red's so her colour!" Cat skidded down the bench from a jogging start, her feet out in front of her, jostling Jade slightly as she came to a stop.
Yes. Jade agreed inwardly, raking her eyes down Tori's back and pretending to be looking at her nails, half hidden behind her hair.
"She looks okay." She said aloud, wondering if she usually sounded this mediocre when she downplayed Tori.
"I made the dress from start, I hope it's comfortable." Cat continued, peering at it as if she might somehow be able to spot whether it was or not.
"I'm sure it's fine."
Cat stopped peering and watched Jade closely. The goth didn't look at her directly, instead continuing to stare at the black nail polish and monitoring her friend's face from her peripherals.
"Jade, are you okay?"
"Fine." She sounded bored. At least she tried to sound bored. Cat didn't seem to know whether to buy or not.
"It's just, you didn't insult Tori, or my dress, or me for bumping into you."
Cat's big brown eyes watched her dolefully, as though she was expecting Jade to be upset with her for even asking.
"Cat, I'm fine." Jade snapped, shaking herself back into her usual fortress-like mentality.
"Okay." Cat seemed to take this harshness as the all-clear for the other girl's mental state, and resumed watching for signs of Tori's dress being less than perfect.
Jade risked another look up at the Latina whilst Cat was distracted, but snapped her eyes back to the floor when she found Tori already looking over her shoulder at her whilst Robbie sorted out her back-up mic.
Andre gave her a cautious thumbs-up from behind his keyboard and Jade pulled a placatory face somewhere in between friendly and uninterested. He took it on the chin, his smile never faltering, and went back to his conversation with the guitarist.
"Hey."
"Hey, Cat. Jade."
Beck sat down on the other side of Cat, slinging his rucksack onto the floor and clutching an almost-empty water bottle.
Jade nodded without looking at him. Their truce was still fragile and, shallow as it might seem, would probably remain so until either she needed help from him or he had something she wanted.
Even now Beck did have his uses though, absorbing Cat's chatter and entertaining her enough with his answers that Jade managed a brief five minutes of peace, retracted back into her own head.
God, for a coffee. For her bed.
"Okay." Tori's voice was like an elbow in the ribs.
Once again, the goth looked up, watching as Tori paced to stand on her mark and look around at everyone.
"Thanks for coming to rehearsal, guys- Andre?"
"All good." He said, gesturing to the keyboard.
"Great, well- here goes." Once again, her gaze shifted almost a little too overtly to the icy blue eyes in the audience, and Jade began to wonder if Tori had perhaps caught her watching more than she had realised.
They played Countdown first, followed by I Want You Back, and then took a short break whilst the guitarist's swapped around and adjusted their instruments and Andre went for a drink.
Jade had to admit that Tori had flourished into an incredible vocalist since she had joined the school. Her performance skills rivalled Jade's own.
Some of the crowd which had their own extra-curricular activities to attend were dispersing around them and for a moment, Jade considered joining them. She wanted nothing more than to go home, she didn't know why she was dragging herself through this. Her fingertips closed around her bag and she tensed her legs, but let the bag go and relaxed again with a long sigh as Tori re-appeared on the stage. Why she suddenly gave a shit, she couldn't say, but for some reason she couldn't allow herself to walk away in Tori's view. It would almost certainly hurt the other girls feelings on some level, and there was a disapproving clicking in the back of her head that was usually reserved for badly edited movie trailers and people who put sugar in their coffee.
When Tori noticed that Jade had stayed even after Cat had apologised and rushed off to her hairdressers appointment, her eyebrows hitched a little and she blinked, sparing a look at Beck as if he might somehow have had something to do with it.
After a purposefully careless look in return, Jade pointedly ignore both of them. If Tori could find anything to criticise about the situation, she didn't let it show.
"Okay, the last one, mainly to see what the new guy's got." Tori beamed at the guitarist, who was younger and shyer looking than the one that had been before him.
Tori sang Fast Car as though she had been through every mentioned bit of turmoil and pain personally, and Jade caught herself staring again, too entrapped in her performance to remember she wasn't supposed to outwardly like the singer.
The audience applauded so hard after the final word that it sounded twice the size it was, and even Jade gave her a slow, grudging kind of clap. That had definitely been... something.
Tori smiled and waved and backed off stage, and the rest of the crowd began to stand, and stretch around her. Some people congratulated her as they left, some high-fived, some merely nodded in a strange form of respect.
Tori propped the mic up on a chair, unclipped her back-up mic, and immediately became smaller, more deer-like.
It was infuriating.
But that didn't mean Jade didn't still need her help. She pursed her lips and walked over to Tori as though she was unaware she was doing it.
"Jade!" Tori was trying to sound casual and it was obvious. The hesitant way she clasped her hands together and how the bright, customer-service smile was pinned on like an after thought gave her away. Tori had been strained around her lately, and Jade wasn't exactly ignorant as to why.
"I wasn't expecting you to come see me. Or stay for the songs. Or, you know... turn up." She winced, as though what she had said hadn't been as fair as it was.
"Yeah, well..." Jade was fixedly not looking her in the eye, but at the space just behind her left shoulder.
"Did you... want something?"
Perhaps she had imagined it, but Jade felt there was something distinctly yet subtly accusatory about her tone.
The goth was acutely aware of the door to the black box shutting as the last person other than themselves left, and of the sudden pressure the following silence put on her to speak.
"I-" Yes, Tori, A favour- a pretty big one actually and one that you could probably ruin me with but one that I have to ask you specifically for because I have no one else after years of being a career bitch.
"No. Nothing. Never mind. Nice, uh... nice songs." She said the last word as though she wasn't sure if it was one, or, if it was, if it was the right one.
"Okay." Tori now looked suspicious. Jade had been nasty to her since they had first crossed paths, but for the last few weeks it had escalated beyond the pale. Until she had gotten through the first half of the last song incident free, Tori had actually been fairly convinced Jade had been planning some kind of sabotage.
"Well, thanks. I'll see you Monday, I guess."
Jade cursed the day she was born for being such a coward, and decided against saying something cruel.
"Yeah. Monday. Laters." She walked away too quickly, and grimaced as she caught Tori's questioning expression from the corner of her eye as she half-turned to push the door open and leave.
-X-
Outside of Tori's house, rain drummed loudly down on the sunroof of Jade's car. The headlights were off, the engine killed, and the radio silenced. For a little while, Jade just sat, watching Tori argue with Trina silently from the warmly lit living room, their movements seeming more theatrical for the lack of sound, a silent movie in full colour.
Driving to Beck's trailer was a temptation Jade couldn't deny. Sure, he was with the bimbo from his math class now, but she knew that he'd change that pretty quickly if he thought Jade might come back to fill the void she had so unexpectedly left behind.
And what about the void he left behind? Is he going to fill it again? Did he ever? How long are you going to sit trying to hammer a square into a triangle-shaped hole?
Jade felt her stomach drop as she considered the alternative. And anyway- she had left him. She had gotten this far. She couldn't back out and be left with nothing.
She pushed the door open with a dull clunk and the drumming of the rain became a harsh hissing. She pulled her hood up, ran to the shelter of Tori's porch, and then pulled it back down, hugging herself and looking from the doorbell to the safety of her car and back again.
She pressed it.
"I lied, on Friday. I want a favour. Need a favour."
It preceded even 'hello' and came out in the kind of rush that gave away Jade's uncharacteristic nerves.
Tori wet her lips and glanced at the floor. Until Friday, the goth hadn't once acknowledged her this month apart from when she wanted to snipe at her shortcomings, had ignored her all week when Tori had needed help with her script writing and now suddenly, at 11pm on a Sunday night, she needed a favour?
Tori's mind coiled around the idea angrily. She should slam the damned door in her face; slam the door, delete her from her phone, from the Slap, from everything and be just as cold to the goth as the goth had been to her.
"Sure." She said.
"I- really?" Jade seemed awkward, caught off guard. When Tori didn't change her mind, she added, "I just thought 'cause I've been a raging bitch to you all month and, well, forever, that you might…y'know. Slam the door in my face."
Tori smiled a slightly forced smile. "Idea never crossed my mind." She said with a sigh, stepping aside to let the other girl in.
"Okay, so, what do you want?" Tori asked slowly, when Jade wasn't forthcoming.
"I… Okay, promise not to freak out."
"I am making no promises." Tori said firmly, not sure where this was going.
"You have to promise." Jade insisted, not looking at her.
"Alright, fine, fine, I promise. But you might wanna come upstairs first because Trina's decided tonight is her night to watch TV, again." She shouted the last work over her shoulder into the house, where Trina shouted back some brusque insult from one room, and her mother scolded them both from another.
Jade nodded and followed Tori up the stairs into the room she had only even been into once, alone.
She fiddled with her sleeve and Tori had to admit to herself that it was strange to see her so nervous.
"I-" She sighed, letting go of her sleeve and looking up at the ceiling as if there might be a script she could follow taped to it.
"Okay, remember when I left Beck? Well, it wasn't actually because of the Emily thing. I mean- the skank didn't exactly help, but I… well, I suppose I kind of used it as an excuse."
"To break up with him?" Tori guessed, elongating the 'to' whilst her brain tried to work out what Jade was really saying.
"Yeah. To break up with him."
"But… So why did you break up with him, if it wasn't because of 'the Emily thing'?"
"Because I was confused."
"As in it was all a misunderstanding and you didn't really mean to break up with him?" Tori had heard that record before.
"No, as in I didn't understand what I wanted any more and so I broke up with him. But I didn't have it in me to tell him that and so I used the Emily thing."
"Oh." Tori sat down on the edge of the bed, too interested in the conversation to remember that she had been mad at Jade just minutes before. This was the first time Jade had talked to her like a real person in a long while, and Tori was a sucker for it every time.
"So- what were you so confused about that made you leave Beck after so long?"
Jade went back to the thread that was sticking out from her sleeve.
"Well, that's kind of what I need your help with."
Need help? It was a favour a minute ago.
"Alright." Tori pressed, feeling like Jade was avoiding the point.
"If you breathe a word of this to anyone I swear I'll-"
"End my miserable life and make it look like an accident, I know the drill, Jade." Tori rolled her eyes and Jade, whilst looking like she was still unsure about what she was about to say, seemed satisfied.
"I want you to kiss me."
Tori choked on her breath. "I- you what?"
"You heard what I said, Vega."
Tori just stared. "What- that's what you were confused about?"
Jade just stared at the table between the sofa and the TV.
"I…" Tori took a deep breath. "Why me? Why not ask Cat?"
"Cat?" Jade repeated incredulously. "Tori, I wouldn't have had time to explain this to Cat."
"What do you mean, you wouldn't have had the time?"
"Because, in fifty billion years the sun is going to explode." Jade parried irritably.
Tori was about to get defensive when the voice in the back of her head spoke some pragmatism.
Come on. That must have taken a lot. She's a naturally angry person, it's to be expected.
"Fine."
Jade looked up at her hesitantly.
"Fine, if you really think it'll help that much, then I'll do it. But only on one condition."
Jade tucked her hair behind her ear and her hands disappeared into her sleeves. "What?"
"You have to be my partner for Sikowitz's assignment. Other wise, you'll go with Cat, and I'll get stuck with Robbie, and as nice as he is… Well. He makes hard work out of simple tasks, if you know what I mean. I want to get good grades for this, and you always get good grades, so. So there. That's my condition."
Jade thought she'd gotten off pretty lightly- Cat would love to be paired with Robbie anyway.
"Deal." She shrugged.
Jade looked like a ball of nerves and it really was the strangest thing to see.
"So… Am I just… pecking you?"
"Tori…" Jade sighed and turned her head away.
Jade flailed for something to say that could properly convey what she felt.
"I just really need… whatever the hell this is. I hate being this dependent on anyone other than myself and it literally killed me to ask you for this. Please- I don't want you to 'peck' me, I want you to kiss me."
"Okay." Tori said gently, more out of placatory instinct than having processed what Jade was saying. Honestly, she was yet to get past how genuinely the other girl had said 'please'. She scolded herself for thinking like that when Jade was so upset.
"Okay." She repeated. "I get it."
There was an awkward silence.
"It doesn't have to be now. You know- It can be… whenever." Jade was staring at her Chuck Taylors, trying to cover up the blush that had crept up her neck.
"Alright, well. Maybe… Maybe it would be easier if it happened a little more spontaneously. Let's just see how it goes this week, and what happens happens?"
Jade nodded, her eyes not really in the room.
"Do you wanna stay? It's getting kinda late."
Jade came back to reality and glanced up at the window. Sheets of rain washed down the glass as the sky continued to empty itself on California, reflecting and distorting her face back at her against the frame of the night.
"I-" Jade thought about it. Staying here would be practical, save her from drowning in the rain, and would probably be a good chance to start making a lot of back-payments of being nice to Tori.
"No." She felt her heart rate settle with the safety of her decline. "Thanks, though. I just gotta… Do some stuff." She lied lamely.
"Are you sure?" Tori gave the window a pointedly concerned look.
"No." Jade admitted. "But I think I'm at my limit today."
Tori smiled brightly. "Well, you know, in half hour it'll be tomorrow and you can wipe your count."
Jade smiled a little. "I don't think it works like that, Vega."
The Latina rolled her eyes. "Fine, fine. Can you- I don't wanna sound like I'm your mom, but, can you maybe text me when you're home? Or something- just so I know you didn't drive your car into a flood or something?"
Jade stood up, her car keys clinking in her hand. "Sure."
Tori smiled and led her back down stairs, where Trina was still lounging watching television with a bag of chips balanced on her chest.
"Isn't it past your bedtime, lil sis?" She called antagonistically, without looking away from the screen.
"Hey, careful with that water, Trina, you're only safe to be around it for another twenty minutes." Jade called back, smirking at the audible choking sound that came in response.
"Did your freaky friend just call me a gremlin?" She raged, her head bobbing up from behind the back of the sofa.
"No!" Jade exclaimed. She looked at her watch. "Not for another… Nineteen minutes."
"Why you-"
"Trina, stop annoying your sister and her friend." Tori's dad was in a navy blue dressing gown and a white shirt. He sounded monotone and tired.
"I- what?! They're annoying me! Dad? Dad!" Trina threw herself from the couch and stomped after him as he left the room, raving about her innocence.
Tori laughed with more menace than Jade had ever suspected she had as she heard her mother join in with telling the older Vega sibling off. "She is a gremlin."
Jade couldn't help but smile with her. "And it's her best feature."
Tori laughed again, and unlatched the door for the other girl, pulling it open.
"See you tomorrow?" Tori dared to sound hopeful. She knew that she probably couldn't tell anyone about their agreement, but she at least hoped that it might mean Jade would be nicer to her. Maybe even friendly.
The rain was coming down hard enough for small drops to splash up into the house. "Yeah. Tomorrow."
At 01:12am, Tori's eyes cracked open and she reached for the lit-up screen resting on her bedside table.
Made it home.
J x
Was that a kiss? Had Jade West just put a kiss at the end of a text message to her?
This is going to be a really weird week.
