Sehnsucht

My blurred imaginings remain at odds

With reasoning I'd always held as true.

Charged with deserting earth to pursue gods

Of dubious existence, I find you.

Sehnsucht sustained me in those moments few,

Now baptizing against the sandy glare

As wild hope in my heart is born anew

And sets me to reject the steely stares.

The truth of life beyond this life restores as morning dew!


A/N: Right, so this is one of those instances where the author's note explaining the work turns out to be longer than the work in question. My apologies. Sehnsucht, for those of you not in the know, is a German word referring to "longing" (specifically, for the purposes of this poem and that of C.S. Lewis whose autobiography discussed it at some length, a "longing for a transcendent quality of life as we might find in another reality, or heaven"). The Christian apologist is famously quoted as saying in regards to this phenomenon: "If I find in myself a desire which no experience in this world can satisfy, the most probable explanation is that I was made for another world." Many of the pleasures to be found on earth – including, naturally, those of a romantic relationship – point to the "unattainable ecstasy" of "that other country." It was in writing this poem that I hoped to encapsulate (in my own groping, flawed, and ultimately limited way) what I believe is one of the most significant aspects of Vash and Meryl's relationship – if, indeed, such a romantic relationship were to exist between them; Vash can be made to embody a higher, unearthly calling for Meryl by way of his behavior and very existence as a Plant Angel, and the poem could represent Meryl's feelings upon realizing that there's more to life than inhabiting some dustball called Gunsmoke, typing reports and never giving a thought to the idea of eternity.

To read more about Sehnsucht, check out the entry Wikipedia has on it, or go to the Google search engine and look up "Surprised by Joy by C.S. Lewis." (Ach, I miss the old days when you could include links in your stories. And smilies. And asterisks. And script form. And... okay, now I'm rambling.)

Oh, and the poem also serves as a dedication for my boyfriend, who daily leaves me "surprised by Joy." :D