CHAPTER ONE
In the town of Dimmsdale, there stood a nondescript two-story house. The mailbox outside it bore the legend "The Turners". Mr. and Mrs. Turner lived there, with their son Timmy. It was about four in the afternoon on a typical Sunday. Down in the living room, there was the sound of talking.
"Hey, Short-stuff!" Mr. Turner called out to Timmy, "We're heading out to Dinner".
"Yay!" Timmy said, running out of his room where he had been playing videogames clutching a knife, fork, and bib, "where are we going to eat?"
"If you mean 'we' as in Mom and me, then 'we' are going out to a five-star restaurant", Mr. Turner replied, using his fingers to imitate speech marks when he said 'we'.
"What?" Timmy exclaimed, "You mean that I'm not coming with you?" Only then did he realize that both his Mom and Dad were wearing formal clothes.
"Sorry, Dear", Mrs. Turner said as she closed her handbag, "It's a business dinner for potential clients that are looking at a house I'm selling. It came up all of a sudden.
"But, but, but, this is Sunday", Timmy exclaimed, "and we always eat together on Sunday night!"
"Sorry Dear, but its business", Mrs. Turner replied, "but I've left you a salad in the refrigerator however so you won't go hungry".
'Oh, yummy! A salad!', Timmy thought sarcastically. What else could go wrong?
"And just so you don't feel lonely, I've asked Vicky to baby-sit while we're out", Mr. Turner said, opening the front door to reveal Vicky looking at Timmy with an evil glint in her eye and a baseball bat being held behind her back.
"And I'm looking forward to having some quality fun time with Timmy!", Vicky said in a very insincere tone.
"Thanks for coming out at such short notice, Vicky", Mrs. Turner said.
"Anything to help my favorite clients – as well as the triple-rate for short notice baby-sitting gigs", Vicky replied, holding out her hand.
With that, both Mr. and Mrs. Turner walked out the door, Mr. Turner giving Vicky a thick wad of money in the process.
"Goodbye, Mr. and Mrs. Turner, have a good business dinner", Vicky said, before closing the door and nailing it shut with boards. She then turned to face Timmy with an evil grin on her face.
"That does it. I'm out of here!", Timmy exclaimed as he ran up the stairs.
"Get back here, Twerp!", Vicky snarled as she ran up after him, brandishing the baseball bat.
Timmy managed to get to his room, enter it, then close and lock the door before Vicky got to it. Vicky started pounding on the door.
"Open up! You've got chores, Twerp, and you're going to do them!" she snarled, "If you open the door right now, I promise that you'll get only half the pounding you'll get otherwise if I have to knock this door down!"
At that moment, Timmy's fairy godparents Cosmo and Wanda poofed into being, floating above Timmy, who was still looking terrified.
You know, half-a-pounding doesn't sound half bad", Cosmo said inanely while biting one of his fingernails.
"I trust Vicky's promises about as far as I could drop-kick a safe", Wanda replied. Timmy nervously nodded.
"You were warned, Twerp!", Vicky shouted as she picked up an axe.
"I wish that door was invulnerable", Timmy shouted. Wanda and Cosmo waved their wands.
Vicky's axe swing on the door – instead of going through it – instead suddenly bounced off, causing her to wobble backwards.
"What the…?" she exclaimed as she tried again without success. The third attempt caused the axe to shatter.
"So, you have a metal door, do you, Twerp?" she exclaimed, "Well, there are other ways to get twerps out of their rooms. And when I get in there, you are going down! Not only that, you'll be paying me for a new axe!"
Timmy's relief was short-lived as he suddenly heard a whirring sound. He looked at the source of the sound and saw the screws of the top door hinge coming out. He looked to his fairy godparents.
"Oh no, she's got a power-screwdriver. I think its time to make myself scarce", Timmy said as he saw the center hinge fall to the floor, "I wish we were outside the house!"
Just as the last hinge was removed and Vicky pushed her way in, Timmy, Cosmo, and Wanda poofed outside the front door. Timmy raced for his bike.
"I gotta get away from her", Timmy breathed as he got on his bike and started pedaling. Cosmo had turned himself into a backpack while Wanda turned into a bike helmet.
"Get back here, Twerp!", Vicky screamed as she looked out of the bedroom window in time to see Timmy riding down the street.
"Not a chance, Icky Vicky!" Timmy shouted back. Vicky was angry that the twerp escaped her planned torture session, but she was also fearful that if she did not get Timmy back before his idiot parents returned, she would be held responsible and goodbye babysitting money! She raced downstairs in order to get her own bike so that she could chase Timmy down.
Vicky's chase did not last long though. As she started pedaling, she head two 'pops' as her tires ran over a couple of nails – courtesy of Cosmo – causing her bike to become unrideable.
"My bike!", Vicky exclaimed, "You'll pay for that too, Twerp!" she promised. She had to get back to her house and grab her dorky sister Tootie's bike so that she could hunt Timmy down. As she started to jog back to her house, she promised herself that she would pound Timmy to a complete and utter pulp for this.
"Where are you going, Sweetie?" Wanda asked worriedly as Timmy continued to ride down the street.
"Anywhere away from Vicky, at least until Mom and Dad get home", Timmy replied.
"Well, that could be hours," Cosmo replied, "so what do we do in the meantime?"
"I could hide out at A.J.'s or Chester's", Timmy suggested.
"Vicky is going to look for you at all of your familiar haunts", Wanda pointed out, "and she's not going to be subtle about turning over every one of your friends".
"You're right, Wanda", Timmy replied, "I'm going to need some maneuvering room. Lets go to the mall. That will give me plenty of places to hide.
"Well, that's worth a try, but Vicky is going to be pulling out all the stops this time," Wanda reminded him.
"Pulling out stop signs?" Cosmo asked perplexedly, "Why does Vicky want to do that?"
"Cosmo, why are you such a jidiot at times?" Wanda replied tiredly.
"Cosmo's not as bad as Mom and Dad", Timmy said, "they are such nitwits not to see Vicky for what she really is.
"Well, look on the bright side. If it wasn't for their inattentiveness and Vicky's callousness, we would not have been assigned to you", Wanda pointed out.
"Not only that, if your folks weren't so dumb and Vicky wasn't so mean either", Cosmo added inanely.
Timmy idly wondered how Cosmo ever managed to graduate from Carl Poofy-Pants Fairy High School. Words of three syllables or more just didn't seem to register with him. Just then, thinking about Cosmo's alma mater gave him an idea.
"I've got the perfect place to hide out for a while", Timmy announced, "I wish we were in Fairy-world!"
With a POOF, Timmy, his bike, and both Wanda and Cosmo vanished.
