Disclaimer: I do not own Human Target and intend no copyright infringement.
Quick movements and Carmine usually didn't belong in the same sentence, so Carmine suddenly sitting up and fixating his gaze on a spot on the floor caught Ilsa's attention. Closer examination revealed that the spot was a beetle, some shiny, black, multi-legged thing with antennae.
"No, Carmine, no. You're not going to eat it." The mere thought made Ilsa shudder. She quickly got up from behind her desk.
Carmine's puzzled expression spoke volumes: "But I saw it first." He moved his nose closer to the insect which started crawling away from the warm dog breath. Carmine craned his neck, not letting it out of sight.
"Sit. Stay. Heel. Down." Ilsa tried all dog commands she had ever heard, hoping one of them would work.
Judging from the look on Carmine's face, she could have uttered them in Chinese, it would have had about the same effect.
Oh, bloody hell.
She grabbed a piece of paper from her desk, went down on her knees, face to face with Carmine, and tried to guide the insect onto it.
Which did an impressive job of balancing right on the edge of the sheet, just so that Ilsa couldn't lift it up.
"A little bit of cooperation would be great", Ilsa told the beetle. "I'm trying to save your life here, after all."
Carmine was positively pouting by now. "Go and catch your own snack", his expression said.
Ah, finally, the insect had crawled onto the sheet completely.
At this very moment the door to her office was opened and in came Guerrero: "Ilsa, about the new alert system…"
The sudden draft flipped the sheet of paper over, the beetle landed on the floor again, Carmine lunged forward, Ilsa lunged forward, she had no choice but cupping her hand protectively over the insect.
Of course it had nothing better to do than crawl up her palm, tingling her skin with its ugly thin legs, while Carmine prodded the back of her hand with one of his giant paws.
Her hairdo was in shambles, her skirt had ridden up her thighs and she had a ladder in her silken tights.
Ilsa Pucci, world-famous billionaire.
Guerrero was looking down at her with raised eyebrows.
Ilsa pursed her lips, grabbed the piece of paper and shoved it underneath the beetle. "Could you…?"
Guerrero helped her to her feet so that she didn't need to lift her hand from the bug.
Carmine was outright indignant now. These two were joining forces against him! How unfair! And that from Guerrero who never resisted a quick snack either!
Sulking, he trotted out of the room.
Guerrero opened one of the large office windows and Ilsa set the beetle free. Slightly humming, it flew off.
"This stays between the two of us", she told him.
Guerrero looked at her over the rim of his glasses.
"You don't have this on tape, Mr. Guerrero, do you?", she asked, suddenly remembering his spying habits.
He arched one eyebrow.
Ilsa sighed. Of course. Trust Guerrero to take the opportunity... "To make sure this stays stashed away safely, what do I have to do?"
No I'm your boss, I demand..? No stomping of high heels and imperative voice raising?
Guerrero nodded appreciatively. "I'll delete it once I get back to my desk."
Now Ilsa was puzzled. "What did I...?"
"You're starting to respect me", he said and walked off.
