Minerva McGonagall was doing the exact same thing tonight that she had been doing for the past two nights – attempting to wear a hole in the plush purple carpet of Albus' sitting room by walking the same path back and forth over and over again…ad infinitum.
'How long could it possibly TAKE,' she thought to herself, angrily. They had returned from the battle a week previously, and she had given her testimony about her role in it to the Wizengamot and had, naturally, assumed that Albus would do the same and return to the school at approximately the same time as she had. Dumbledore had given her permission to wait for him back in his private rooms, and reminded her of the password, just before she left. 'Granted,' she continued silently, 'He had a much greater role in the battle than I did, but still…' Minerva stopped her pacing abruptly, and made her way to the chair behind Albus' desk, flopping down unceremoniously, and began a search through his drawers. She hadn't eaten much lately, and though her appetite hadn't returned in full force, she figured that should at least nibble on something small. She would have asked one of the Hogwarts house elves for something, but she wasn't really in the mood for company, and they did have a tendency to talk. 'Damn it, Albus….I know you have some cockroach clusters in here somewhere,' she muttered, continuing to rifle through the drawers in full force.
'Minerva, is there something in particular that you're looking for?' Came an amused, but very tired voice from the doorway. Minerva looked up, and saw the weary figure of Albus Dumbledore, leaning against the frame.
'I just wanted some….cockroach clusters,' she explained, slamming the drawer in front of her shut, and attempting to keep the happiness and relief out of her voice. 'Where the hell have you been, Albus! I've been worried sick about you!'
Dumbledore gave a tired smile, and waved his hand toward the fireplace, causing the dying flames to rise up sharply. Carefully removing his outer robe, folding it and laying it over the back of a chair, he sat down on the couch in front of the fire, and leaned his head back, closing his eyes. 'Minerva my dear, I'm very sorry that I caused you such distress, but there was no reason to worry, really. The battle is….over,' he sighed, 'as you well know – thank you, by the way, for your immense help – and I was merely tying up a few loose ends. Won't you come and join me?' He segued, patting his hand on the couch.
For the moment, Minerva ignored him, but did move to kneel in front of him, in order to get a better look at him. She looked up at his worn and lined face, frowning as she did so. She never realized that Albus could look so….so old, and she hastily wiped a tear from her eye. 'Honestly, Minerva…you're making me feel self conscious,' Albus laughed, his eyes still closed. 'Don't bother counting the wrinkles, there are far too many…I fear you'll end up putting yourself to sleep. It COULD be, however, that you're just appreciating the view.' Dumbledore opened his eyes, and smiled down at Minerva. 'I was told that I was quite handsome in my day…though that was before my broken nose, of course.'
A sudden thought came to Minerva, and she figured that there would be no better time than this to ask the question that she had. After all, HE had brought the subject up. 'Albus? Might I ask you a question?'
'Of course, Minerva, what is it?'
'Albus, I've always wanted to know; how DID you break your nose?' She crossed her arms over his legs, resting her chin on them, and smiled up at him in a teasing way. 'Horse and buggy accident? A nasty hex from a jilted girlfriend? Alley fight with Jack the Ripper?'
'I realize that you believe me to be ancient, Miss McGonagall,' Albus said, a bemused look on his face, 'but I'll have you know that I was but seven years old when Jack ravaged the unfortunates of London, and as advanced and talented as I was even then…I doubt that my mother would have let me out of the house to go chase after a murderer. Though now that I think of it, I probably could have taken him…because you know, I AM considered-'
'Yes, yes…the greatest wizard of our time. Albus, really,' Minerva interrupted. 'Can you possibly drop the dramatics, and tell me the truth about your nose?'
'I can't understand why you want to know so badly,' Albus replied. 'I'm sure the story will bore you to tears, and I would rather not dwell on the reason for my wasted good looks.'
'Albus? Shut up. You know as well as I, that you are just as handsome now as you were when you were younger. Even more so, I daresay. I think the broken nose gives you character. I rather doubt I'm alone in my supposition, as evidenced by the myriad pathetic women who send you love notes every day,' she laughed. When he didn't answer, she sighed deeply, and stood, deciding to sit next to him on the couch as he had previously requested. 'You're not going to tell me the story, are you?' She pouted.
'Not now, my dear,' Albus replied, taking one of her hands in his. 'That is a story perhaps for another time. I hope we have many years together, and there will be a more appropriate time for me to…bare my soul to you, so to speak.'
'All right,' she capitulated. 'But I'm holding you to your promise. And someday, you WILL tell me. Since you don't want to talk about your nose, why don't you tell me what's happened with Grindelwald? Is he going to be subjected to the Dementor's Kiss?' Minerva suppressed a shudder; she hadn't been an actual witness to the Kiss, but she had heard from Alastor Moody all about it.
Again, Albus looked uncomfortable. 'No…I specifically requested that he NOT receive the Kiss.'
'But Albus…why! He certainly deserves it, after all the things that he's done! I can't understand why you'd be so…so GENEROUS to that filth! I was surprised that you didn't kill him when you had the chance.' Minerva was so busy with her diatribe, she didn't even pay attention to the fact that Albus' face had gone pale.
'Were you, Minerva?' Albus asked quietly, not able to look at her. 'Were you REALLY surprised?' He was studying the floor rather intently, as if expecting that at any moment, something was going to rise up from it, and swallow him whole.
Minerva had heard the rumors, of course, but that's what she thought they were…rumors.
'I…I KNOW he was a f-friend of yours, Albus, of course.' She was choosing her words carefully, gazing over at him, trying to get him to meet her eyes. 'So maybe it's not SO surprising…'
Albus smiled at her attempt to gloss over the Grindelwald matter. 'I suppose the time to bare my soul has come sooner than I thought it would,' he murmured, squeezing her hand tightly, and finally turning to meet her gaze. 'My dear Minerva, I know that you've heard the stories about my…relationship…with Grindelwald. I've never actually TOLD anyone the true story before. Oh, of course Aberforth knows all about it, and Gellert himself…but you will be the only person that I've ever confessed to. Perhaps it is time.' As he paused, ostensibly to gather his thoughts, Minerva took a deep breath. What was he going to tell her? She wondered. And was she truly ready to hear whatever it was…or would curiosity at least emotionally kill the cat? 'Go on then, Albus,' she whispered, trying to keep her voice even. 'I would be honored to be your…confidante.'
Dumbledore smiled faintly, and lifted her hand, kissing it gently. 'You are much more to me than a mere confidante, Minerva, I hope you know that. I care for you more than you know…' Seeing Minerva's open mouthed stare, he held up a hand. 'We'll talk about that later, Minerva, please.' Stretching his long legs out in front of him, he folded his hands carefully, and began.
'Of course, Albus,' Minerva murmured, not daring to hope that her esteemed former professor and mentor might feel the same way about her as she did him. 'How did you meet…him…in the first place?' She asked.
'You'll recall, I'm certain, the story that I told you of how my father, Percival, ended up going to Azkaban?' Minerva nodded, not wanting to pursue the subject of Ariana's brutal attack, for fear of bringing more sorrow to her friend, and Albus continued. 'Mother decided it would be best for us to move to Godric's Hollow…to start fresh, if you will. One of our neighbors was Bathilda Bagshot-'
'The author of 'A History of Magic'?' Minerva interjected.
'My dear, if you continue on like this, I'll NEVER get the story out, and that might drive you mad,' Albus smiled. 'However you are, of course, right. The one and the same. Anyway, Bathilda lived a few houses away from us in Godric's Hollow. She became somewhat friendly with my mother, and, shall I say, a bit concerned about me, since there were really no boys of my age for me to befriend.'
'What about Aberforth?' Minerva said, interrupting again. 'Sorry, Albus.'
'No trouble.' He glossed over her question, not wishing to discuss his problems with his brother before it was necessary. 'Well one day, after being expelled from Durmstrang, into Godric's Hollow came Gellert Grindelwald. He was Bathilda's great nephew, and he had come to stay with her for a while.'
Minerva became aware of the fact that she was holding her breath in anticipation of what Albus was going to say next. She almost didn't want to hear, but she wasn't going to stop him now.
'Bathilda felt that it would be a good idea for us to become friends, and therefore introduced us. Within a relatively short amount of time, I became rather…enamored…of Gellert.' Albus colored red. It wasn't that he was embarrassed of his feelings, of course, he was just embarrassed of WHO it was that the feelings were directed towards.
Taking advantage of Albus' brief pause, Minerva took the opportunity to speak. 'So it's true, then…you WERE in love with Grindelwald?' It was a wonder that people actually spoke of a broken heart; that wasn't where Minerva was feeling her pain. She felt as though there was a lump of lead sitting in the pit of her stomach. 'Indeed I was,' Albus replied. 'Or perhaps I just thought I was. Gellert had a way of making everything seem exciting and possible, and I certainly craved companionship, which, since the death of my mother and subsequent guardianship over Ariana, markedly inflamed my interest. We were going to restore wizarding rule,' he said, flushing deeply at the thought. 'For 'the greater good', and all of that. Together, we would be the young leaders of this movement, and Gellert told me that we wouldn't have to hide Ariana anymore…' Albus' voice broke, and tears began to roll down his cheeks. Minerva quickly took his hand, and squeezed it gently, remaining silent while Albus composed himself. 'To make a long story short, a few months later, Aberforth was trying to convince me to give it all up. Said we couldn't take Ariana with us on our adventures, and that he was going to stay home from Hogwarts and take care of her. He called me all sorts of names…and I'm certain he was right. Gellert lost his patience, and began to Crucio Aberforth. I begged him to stop, but he would not…and the three of us began to duel. Ariana…Ariana got caught in the crossfire, and was killed. We were never really certain who cast the curse that killed her.'
'Oh, Albus!' Minerva gasped, at this point trying to stem her own tears, 'I'm so sorry. That must have been awful for you.'
'Indeed. Aberforth blamed me…as well he should…and there was a fight at Ariana's funeral. He broke my nose that day.'
Instantly, Minerva was ashamed of herself. What she had thought was possibly a childhood accident, or something amusing, was something that obviously was overtly painful for Dumbledore. 'Albus, I'm sorry…I should never have asked you about your nose. I apologize for making you relive those terrible times.'
'Minerva my dear, don't worry. Had I not wanted to tell you, I would not have. You are very important to me, and are very kind to listen to an old man's rambling. I think it helps to get it out; if that makes sense.'
'I'm glad I could help, Albus, and as I said before, I'm honored that you chose me to be the one that you took into your confidence.' Almost without realizing what she was doing, she put her arms around Dumbledore, and held him close. 'And you are NOT old!' Minerva added, quietly but vehemently.
'I'm inclined to disagree,' Albus began, and only continued when he could feel the tension in Minerva's body. 'But perhaps it's best that we leave that to be discussed another day.'
Taking a deep breath, Minerva decided to plunge into her next question. 'Then perhaps we should discuss what you said earlier, Albus…about how you care for me more than-'
'-And THAT, my dear, is ALSO something that perhaps is best left to be discussed another day.' Knowing that Minerva would not be happy with that answer, Albus smiled to himself, then extricated himself from Minerva's arms. Before she had a chance to complain, he in turn wrapped his around her, and pulled her close. 'Patience, Minerva. As I said, I hope we will have many years together in which to discuss our feelings. Right now, however, I hope you will be as content as I, just to sit here, watch the fire, and relax.'
Minerva cuddled up closer to Albus, and he placed a gentle kiss on her head. They remained there in relaxed silence throughout the night, only finally falling asleep as the last faint embers of the fire flickered out of existence.
