Gotta write the usual... I don't own Vampire Diaries ;(

Another what-if... what if it had really been Elena kissing Damon back at the end of season 1...


"What are you doing?" Jenna said, looking horrified at Elena who stood looking back at her.

"I don't want to talk about it..." Elena whispered back unsmiling. Elena wasn't sure how she felt and she definitely didn't think she could explain herself to Jenna. Jenna knew she was late for an appointment and had to leave and although she wasn't happy with the situation, she knew that it would be best to leave Elena to work it out for herself. She seemed to be more mature than Jenna had been at that age so best to leave it be.

Damon stood outside the door and heard Elena's declaration to her aunt. What had she been doing? What the hell had just happened? He touched his lips as he thought back to that sweet kiss from her delicious pouty lips. It was true that he had initiated the kiss but she had kissed him back. Feeling her open mouth on his had been the most erotic thing he had felt for a very long time. He had thought he had forgotten how to feel and now as he thought of Elena in his arms he wished he could.

The door started opening and he disappeared in the second it took for Jenna to look out the door and walk outside before closing it behind her. She walked to her car, got in and drove off. He returned to the spot he had kissed Elena and stood outside the door, battling with indecision. He felt so much for her, his chest contracted just thinking about how he had felt kissing her, his hands on either side of her face, delicately holding her in case she would break. He needed to talk to her, to find out what she was up to. He thought of the ridiculous love triangle he had got himself involved in. Stefan loved Elena, Elena loved Stefan, and he was just the idiot, the friend who loved Elena. Elena knew this. Why had she kissed him if she didn't mean it?

Elena listened to Uncle John as he rambled on about how much he had loved her birth mom and how he hated vampires. She agreed with him just to shut him up. She had much to think about and Isabelle and Uncle John were very low on her list. She quickly helped clean up the kitchen and excused herself. She rushed upstairs to her bedroom, shutting the door quietly behind her. She threw off her jacket and jeans, pulled off her shoes and went to her chest of drawers. She pushed some socks and underwear aside and drew out her diary. She needed a better hiding place than this but as her privacy had already been compromised by Jeremy she didn't really care where she hid it. She threw herself onto her bed, grabbed a pen from the bedside table and opened up her diary. She started reading the last page:

And Isabelle is just evil. There doesn't seem to be any goodness in her at all. She even threatened to start killing people just to get that stupid invention thing from my great-grandfather. The thing is when I first met Damon I thought he was totally evil. He hurt Caroline and Bonnie and me. But that was right at the beginning. He's changed. He really seems to care about things but doesn't seem to be able to express himself. He's been hurt so often in his life – by Katherine, by his brother and even by me. It's amazing he trusts anyone. But Isabelle said that he loves me. I saw the look on his face when she said it – he looked so pitiful and yet so beautiful as he looked back at me. God, I hated myself for hugging Stefan then and hiding my face away. I should have gone to Damon and held him. He is my friend and I care about him. But I don't love him. I mean I don't love him in that way. I love Stefan. I've got to love Stefan. He saved my life – from the car accident and from myself after I hid away from everyone after my parents died. I won't be another Katherine. I will stay with Stefan no matter what.

Elena threw the diary across the room in disgust. She had written that only two days ago and already so much had changed. She had crossed the line and she knew there was no going back. She was in big trouble and she couldn't see how anything was going to change.

She couldn't think and decided the best thing to do was just try and go to sleep. She was exhausted. She forcefully tried to pull her t-shirt up over her head and got it a little stuck in her hair.

"It looks like you might need a hand or two." Damon said right next to her ear.

She gasped, struggling harder and getting more tangled. She felt Damon's hands on her own and he stopped her struggles, deftly pulling her t-shirt off. She quickly grabbed her quilt and covered herself although she noticed that Damon had turned around and wasn't looking at her.

She heard his smirk although she couldn't see it. "Looks like I came here just in time."

She threw her pillow at him.

"What are you doing here Damon?" She said, annoyed and unhappy. "You really shouldn't be here right now."

He carried on facing away from her. "I can't stop thinking about what happened Elena." He murmured. "I needed to talk to you. I needed to know why we did what we did."

He turned to face her. "And maybe get a repeat performance?" He was smirking, but his beautiful eyes were crinkled in a way that made him look sad, making her want to grab him and never let go.

"Damon. Please go. I can't deal with this right now. I haven't even had a chance to think it through myself."

While she said this Damon's face changed and he looked plain angry. "Oh so it's okay to just mess with my feelings. Oh wait," He said scathingly. "I don't have any."

She shook her head and rushed over to him. She placed her hands on his shoulders and looked deeply into his expressive eyes.

"Damon please. I never said that and now I know you better I never will. You're my best friend. I can't love both of you. That's just..."

Her words were drowned out as Damon's lips crushed hers. He wrapped his arms around her body and she slammed full against him. She didn't try to struggle and she didn't want to. She grabbed fistfuls of his hair sucking his lower lip into her mouth. She couldn't and didn't want to think. Damon was licking her upper lip with his smooth tongue and a weird sound she had never heard before growled from the back of her throat. Damon shivered against her and pushed her to her bed which they both fell on tidily not breaking the kiss.

He was lying on top of her and she hadn't taken a proper breath for a few minutes. Her mind was screaming at her to stop while her body wanted more of Damon. He was so much larger than life, so real and perfect. She felt a hardness push into her stomach and she gasped, taking more of Damon's tongue into her mouth. He moved his tongue past her teeth and moved it in patterns inside her mouth that made her want to scream. She couldn't think and she quickly started to realise that she couldn't breathe. She struggled to push him off her and he quickly complied, breathing heavily. He looked at her with a mixture of lust and envy and his next words broke her already fragile heart.

"I love you so much Elena." He whispered with the deepest sadness in the world.


Woohoo - done it. Written something to put on fanfiction! Okay I know this isn't the greatest story out there but this writing thing looked like a lark so wanted to give it a go. Please do review and I am quite happy (and excited) to read anything you have to say - +ve or -ve!

And be warned ... from here thereon there will be lemons (although gotta remember that Stefan is part of the triangle...) And not to sound too naive but what exactly are lemons? Where did the term come from? And picture Caroline saying this 'I mean Lemons... seriously?' :)