I do not own BWOC characters. This is a slash if you no likey then hit the back button.
Merton was perched behind his computer looking up new medival weapons on eBay when Tommy came bursting into the Lair.
"Merton! I saw the craziest thing in the park; there was this like ten foot tall monster with like five eyes and this horrible breath." Tommy came to a hault in front of his desk.
"I think I may have heard..." Merton got up and walked towards his bookshelfs. He was disturbed in his mumblings when laughter errrupted from behind him. "Tommy this is no laughing matter."
"I-- you-- always--" Tommy managed three words through all his laughing.
"Tommy!" Merton was becoming impatient.
"I didn't see any monsters in the park. I just thought it was funny that every time something is wrong you go mumbling towards your bookshelf." Tommy was still laughing just not as hard anymore.
"Some of these books are very old and very exspensive, thankyouverymuch!" Merton went back to the computer. "If there isn't any monsters in the park then why are you here, Tommy?"
"Just came to hang out with my bestist buddy." Tommy slung an arm around Merton's shoulder's looking at the computer screen. "Do you need anymore weapons, Merton? I'm sure half the ones in here could get you in some trouble."
"You can never have enough weapons." Merton answered before clicking buy, "And anyways some of this could come in handy, if ever there is a real monster Mr. Dawkins." Merton stood and streched his sore back; the down falls of sitting infront of a computer for several hours.
"Merton have you ever wondered about the phrase 'wild monkey sex'?" Tommy asked totally out the blue causing said friend to sputter and look at Tommy in a somewhat shocked state. "Merton?"
"No Tommy, as of recently 'wild monkey sex' has not been on my mind." Merton finally managed to get out.
"I didn't ask if you thought about it; I asked if you wondered about the phrase it's self. I mean it is sort of strange; why would some one want wild monkey sex?"
"My knowledge does not extended to that of the mammal world Tommy; I am blissfully obsessed with what people don't think is real." Was Merton's relpy.
"You have to have some sort of comment."
"Fine! The use of 'wild monkey sex' comes from the fact that when monkeys mate they go at it like bunnies; from one partner to the next intil they're sexually satitsfied. Happy?"
"What if people just like the sound of 'wild monkeys' and 'sex' all in one?"
"Not having this discussion." Merton threw his hands up in the air; he stalked back over to his computer.
"Does talking about sex make you uncomfortable?"
"You know as well as I do that my knowledge on sex is as limited as yours is on supernatural beings. I exspecially do not know anything about wild monkey sex." Merton gave a small self-depricating smile.
Tommy seeing that he had taken the convesation too far turned to a knew subject. "So what all did you buy tonight?"
At this Merton's face brighten up with a huge smile, "Well, I got...." Merton rambled on intill one thing caught Tommy's ear. "Merton, why do you need handcuffs?"
Merton turned a few shades of red, "Well, their nothing really just something that I wanted to pick up..." He was stumbling over his words.
"It's okay Mert, whatever celebrity you look up to thatsworn 'em must be worth it." Tommy put his friend's sputtering to a stop.
"Yeah... celebrity." Merton wiped his hands on his jeans.
"For someone who doesn't have any sexual experience you have some weird kinks ole buddy." Tommy laughed throwing an arm around Merton's shoulder.
"Shut up Tommy." Merton shrugged his arm away from him.
"Hey, I was kidding. Wanna watch a movie?" Tommy flashed Merton one of his million dollar smiles.
"Okay." Merton turned off the computer, "Do you want something to munch on?"
"Whatta think?" Tommy held out his hands, "I'm a going wolf boy."
Ten minutes later Tommy and Merton found themselves back in the Lair with sandwiches and hot coca. "Hey, do you have any whip cream?"
"Yeah," Merton went to the mini fridge and grab a can of whip cream. "Here." He threw it over to Tommy who caught it with one hand. "Those football skills do come in handy." Merton joked.
Tommy stuck his tongue out at Merton. "They have their other purposes." Tommy had a glint in his eye that Merton decided to ignore.
"Right Tommy." Merton went over to his movie collection, "What do you want to watch?"
"Well lets see what you got." Tommy kneeled behind Merton effectivly capturing him between Tommy and the movies. "Is this any good?" Tommy held up Jurassic Park III.
"I have no idea. I think my mom bought it for me; I've never watched it."
"Well lets see it." Tommy sat down on the two seater couch. After putting the movie in Merton moved to the couch also.
Well into the movie Tommy looked at Merton, "Do you get the feeling there is some major gay subtext to Alan and Billy?"
"What?" Merton looked at Tommy as if he had suddenly grown two heads. "Why do you keep asking insane questions tonight?"
"I'm serious, that one part where their all walking it looked liked they were holding hands and then at the fence they try to pull the other threw." Tommy defended himself.
Merton sat in silence, the longer he thought about it, yeah it made sense. "Okay so there might be some gay subtext."
"You think people think we're gay... together?" Tommy asked slowly.
"What!?!" Merton jumped up off the couch, "Why would anyone think we were gay!?"
"Well, we do touch a lot, and it seems we're always stepping into each others personal space." Tommy said calmly from the couch.
"You always touch a lot. I do not touch you!" Merton was pacing the floor now.
"Calm down Merton people probably don't think we're gay. I was only kidding." Tommy tried to reassure his friend.
"Good, now watch the movie and stop asking weird questions." Merton say back down; he scrunched himself into the corner.
Ten minutes passed before there was a loud knocking on the door, "Hey Freaker open up I need something from you."
"Gah!" Merton went to the door, "What Becky?"
"Do you have any eye liner?" Becky was standing there all dolled up.
"Why in the world would you thinkI have eye liner!?" Merton almost shouted.
"You are goth aren't you?" Becky said like it was the simplest thing in the world.
"I do not wear make up."
"Okay geesh, lighten up. Hey Tommy!" Becky waved at Tommy who was looking over the couch. "You two shouldn't spend all your Friday nights in this basement. Half the school already think you two are gay together." Becky turned and went back up the stairs. Merton shut and locked the door; sitting back on the couch he seemed to be in a daze.
"See people do think we're gay together." Tommy looked like the cat who got the caniry.
"Why do you seem so happy about that?!" Merton looked at Tommy cautiously.
"Would it be that bad Merton?" Tommy was moving closer to Merton.
"I--I--do--" Before Merton could get anything else out Tommy pounced on him; leaning down he gave him quick peck on the lips.
"Was that so bad?" Tommy asked smiling.
"Wasn't really much to it I mean..." Merton was going into babbling mood, it wasn't every day your best friend, who was a male, kissed you. Merton didn't get far though before Tommy kissed him.
"How was that?"
"Better, but honestly Tommy..." Another kiss.
"Do you ever stop talking?" Tommy was still smiling at Merton.
"If you must know it is very hard..." A move of Tommy's hips silenced Merton. "Eep! Very hard.."
"Merton no more thinking."
Tell me!
