Title: Alternative Present

Author: Enaty

Rating: M

Warnings: It's rated M. What do you think is gonna happen?

Disclaimer: Not mine, much to my displeasure.

Claimer: The idea.

Author's Notes: at the end.

Alternative Present

"You didn't say a word! Really, Detective! How am I supposed to know if you don't tell me?"

"Cut if off already!" Leon snapped, glaring at the flustered Chinese who in turn stared at him accusingly, making him feel like he'd done something wrong again even though he hadn't.

"But – your birthday!" the Count protested vehemently. "Had I known that today is your birthday, I would have prepared a little something, and Chris..."

"I said, cut it out!" The blonde detective glared even more, face red and embarrassed. "I don't need anything, least of all from you!"

The Chinese pouted, his red lips curled into the cutest pout Leon had ever seen, and he quickly took a sip of his tea to distract himself from them. "It's not as if you had to give me something," he muttered under his breath.

"No, you are right, Detective, I do not." D's voice suddenly sounded different. Pout and distress had vanished from it, and Leon looked up in alarm and surprise at the new sound underlying it.

He was just in time to see Count D standing up and gliding over to the sofa. His breath was knocked out of his lungs when the Chinese sat down besides him. D never, ever -

"But I do want to," D continued, ignoring the baffled look on Leon's face. "Believe me, it is my pleasure."

And without any more warning than that, he bent over, pinned the blonde to the sofa and slipped his hands under the blonde's shirt.

Leon had no chance. Even if D's grip hadn't been so strong, even if he hadn't pressed Leon into the corner of the sofa, leaving him no space to evade, just his simple nearness would have rendered the blonde helpless. The touch of those slim, cool fingers and the sharp fingernails made him gasp for air, the action causing him to smell the enticing, slightly flowery scent that he'd noticed at times, recognisable even through the incense, and he felt like he could drown in that scent.

"What the hell are you doing?!" Leon choked, half-heartedly trying to disengage himself, but D was stronger anyway, so he could as well...

No. No! Not fighting was not an option here. He had to fight, had to push D off him and...

"I don't want – AH!"

"Do not even try to lie to me here," D murmured with glittering eyes as he watched his own hand open the four buttons of Leon's jeans. The blonde had frozen in shock, staring at him with wide eyes, completely unbelieving. D traced his bottom lip with his tongue, admitting to himself that this was exciting – much more than the last time he had done that with, or better, to a human. Leon was so much more exciting than most of his species were, especially now, when he was writhing on the sofa, trying to suppress the little sounds of pleasure at D's touches, to fight that which was happening and pretend he didn't like it at all even though they both knew he did...

"I think I just found an adequate alternative birthday present for you, my dear Detective," D whispered and bent forward to taste -

Such luck that young human males like Leon never required much stimulation.

The blonde's cry of both protest and pleasure echoed in D's ears, delighting the kami to no end. He let go of the human for a second, lips brushing over tender skin as he murmured, "I never thought you'd be averse to be pleasured like this."

"No!" Leon gasped, and immediately continued, apparently scrabbling for his wits, "I mean, yes, I – I am, but not from you, not like -"

His protest was cut off by a long moan. "D, no – no -"

He knew very well that D wasn't taking no for an answer, he'd made that much pretty clear from the beginning, what with the way he was trapped on this sofa, and he didn't want the Chinese to stop, if he was honest, but – but this was D, and Leon would never be able to give this back, do something half as good as this...

He really would have liked to do something more than just melt back into the sofa, not fighting D anymore, but just letting him do whatever he wanted until he felt it coming, and then he wanted to warn him, but D seemed to know and didn't seem very inclined to let go. So Leon just came and fell back, completely exhausted, and lay there, trying to catch his breath again. "D!" he moaned.

The Chinese buttoned up his jeans again, smiled at him, and now that Leon knew what those lips could do, he was even more mesmerised by them.

D got up, returned to his chair and sat down in it delicately. "Yes, Detective?" he purred. Leon picked himself up enough to ask a question.

"What on earth was that?!"

There was a definite sparkle in those mismatched golden and violet eyes. "That, my dear Detective, was my birthday present for you. I do hope you appreciate it."

Leon gaped for several minutes while D calmly returned the look. Then he blushed, shook his head and returned to his teacup, all the while avoiding D's glittering eyes. "Whatever, D," he muttered.


Leon's aunt and uncle had left again. The boy was in bed, happily cradling his new rollerblades to his chest even in his sleep. D closed the door behind himself and sighed softly. After all the uproar today, he felt a strange reluctance to go back to the front room, to pour a cup of tea and eat a slice of cake and look at Leon doing the exact same opposite to him...

He sighed again, halted and steadied himself with one hand at the wall for a moment. Leon. His birthday had been three months ago, three months he'd spent ruing and delighting in the mistake he'd made. Three months in which they both had acted as if nothing had ever happened.

He'd not bought something for Leon for Christmas. He'd thought about it, more than once, while doing the Christmas shopping with the lion's younger brother. He still didn't know what Leon thought about that day. Lately, he'd come to just hope that the blonde wouldn't regard his 28th birthday as the worst day of his life.

Well, no point in prolonging this too much. He should feed Leon a slice of cake and then see him off before...

...well, before he could repeat his mistake.

Leon was contemplating the tea cart when he returned to the parlour. He turned and half smiled at the Chinese. "He's asleep?"

"Quite happily. It was a very good present." D had said the word before he could stop himself, and now bit his lip in anger. "I mean, Chris was very happy about the rollerblades."

"D, you know, I'm a grown man," Leon reminded him softly. "I may need some time, but I can deal with it."

"Oh, can you? Well, you certainly were not too happy back then," D replied, making his voice sound spiteful while his heart clenched in his chest.

To his surprise, Leon only chuckled softly. "Well, what did you expect me to do? It's not as if I ever got any kind of sex as a birthday present. And then from you of all people... Not like anyone can foresee something like that, now, can he?"

He scrutinised the Chinese who was not looking at him while he poured two cups of tea. "I liked your present. Very much," he said simply. D pressed his lips together in dismay. "What a pity for you that I took it otherwise, then. I rather thought you'd not want a Christmas present."

Leon leaned back into the sofa comfortably, his blue eyes tender and warm. "Figured as much. Didn't expect one, either."

D stood; he saw no reason to continue this conversation. "Well, if you don't mind, I would like to close the shop now..."

"Hey, don't I get to give you my present?" Leon rose, too, stretching nonchalantly and yawning. D turned to him, surprised.

"You have got a present for me?" he echoed, strangely pleased and curious in spite of himself. Had Leon really gotten him some special treat, like that wonderful cake from the hotel...?

He cursed his own naivety a moment later when Leon had bent down and pressed his lips to his, only touching them, keeping his hands firmly locked behind his back. He wanted to break away, jump back and push Leon away, but the touch was so gentle, so hesitant, that he couldn't do anything but take it. He wished that Leon would unlock his arms and embrace him, or at least come closer.

Then he understood that the choice was his and that Leon had very well understood why such an assault and not something else...

It was silly, the importance humans contributed to a kiss, but D knew why, and he supposed he'd never understood better than right now.

Leon drew back and for a second D followed his mouth before he caught himself. He touched his own lips with hesitant fingers, felt them prickle. Leon was still standing right in front of him, waiting patiently. D's fingers wandered to his mouth, traced the outline while the blonde smiled.

"I – I think we should stick to alternative presents," the young Chinese managed. The blue eyes laughed and teased, invited him to venture further.

"You need not spend any more money on cakes and pastries. They're far too expensive for you anyway," D finished, more firmly now that he'd made up his mind, and drew back his fingers. Leon smiled still. "Okay," he said, turned and strode out the door. D called after him.

"Oh, and by the way: my birthday in on January 3rd!"

-End-


Author's Notes: Uh... I need a good explanation for this one, don't I? xD Well, I actually have one. I was sitting in the caf with one of my friends last week, and she told me a story about a fellow student of ours who went to the birthday party of a friend without having a present for him. You probably can guess what happened – as an excuse that she didn't have a present and kind of an "alternative present", she offered to blow him...

The story still has me laughing every time I think of it xD Why and where PsoH came into this, I'd rather not know, but well, it did – here's the result. Hope you liked it ^^ And I'd really like to read other interpretations of this little incident... (I mean the original story – not mine. That's already an interpretation.) Come on, this is the season of presents! Surely you can make something up, can't you? ^^

So long, Enaty