Authors Note: I give up. I should not have started writing this because it confused me while I was writing and it didn't even turn out that well in my opinion. Read though, please. Leave whatever in reviews I don't mind, every little comment will help me. This is another entry for Jello Forever's May challenge, the prompt is Empty Promises.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything you recognize as always.
Patrick Jane watched as his girlfriend came into the bedroom where they had been watching television together up until about half an hour ago when she had said she had to do something. His heart broke a little when he saw she was crying at something he didn't know about.
"Teresa? What's wrong?" He was starting to move himself of the bed as she continued to wipe the tears on her face, "I'm pregnant."
"Why do you look upset and sound angry?" They knew each other well enough to know exactly how the other was feeling.
"You promised me Patrick! This wasn't supposed to happen!" He tried to walk across the room to be closer to her but she just took steps backwards as her voice grew in volume, "You promised that we would be careful!" They had been dating for three months, starting their relationship almost a year after the team had managed to distract Jane while Cho and Rigsby had went out to where Lisbon had been alerted to a hit on Red John. When they had arrived at the location Red John had took a few shots at the two agents and the few armed officers they had took with them, fatally injuring one of the back-ups and clipping Cho's shoulder, luckily not doing any lasting damage to the latter man. That had caused Rigsby to use his weapon and successfully murdered the man who had haunted their lives for around about eight years.
Everyone in the work-place knew about Jane and Lisbon's relationship but it wasn't officially against regulations since he was just a civilian helper, but that didn't mean Lisbon wanted to go ahead and become a mother figure so quickly, even if she knew hse wouldn't have much time left on her biological clock.
"So you never wanted kids Teresa?" he looked at her with a disbelieving look in his eyes, "Of course you did, you just wanted to have everything planned out day by day; minute by minute, isn't that right?"
"How can you say that, I've not had any of my life timetabled since high school thanks to working every hour because of cases and a certain consultant who can't behave!"
"Exactly, you now don't even have to work out times because you always know you'll be working, and if you're so annoyed with me why are we even in a relationship, never mind you getting pregnant?" They had always been good at bickering with each other and even being together hadn't changed that.
"I don't know. Maybe you should go home for once," she was speaking at almost the level of a whisper.
"If that's what you want." He watched as she nodded her head slightly then turned away to go back to the empty house he hadn't been in for three months.
The next morning Lisbon turned up to work at her normal time and it was like old times with Jane lying on the bullpen's couch, pretending to be asleep. It felt odd because she was now so used to him staying in her office; on her couch and occasionally messing it up but just him being in there was always enough to keep her grounded. This morning was so different and not in a good way. She stood over him with her thumbs in her pockets, gently rocking on her feet, looking at the wall behind the couch.
"Jane, can I have a word in my office?" She still hadn't got used to calling him Patrick especially when they were in CBI grounds.
Lisbon walked away and as Jane followed her he watched as she sat down behind her desk. His eyes were a no-go area because if she even dared to look at them then she would be lost and wouldn't say what had to be put out there.
"I didn't want you to leave, I'm just scared and angry," she took a deep breath because she was going to be showing her deep, real emotions to him and she wasn't that confident about it, "I'm scared because I don't know if you're ready to have another child and because I don't know if I am ready; I want children but I, well, wasn't sure if now is the right time. Angry I suppose because as you so kindly pointed out, I want to be in control of everything and I didn't really have much of a choice in this."
Jane moved across the office and sat on the edge of her desk, gently sweeping a strand of dark hair out of her eyes, "Teresa, Red John is dead, I need and want to start again and I'd like to have the new life with you but if you don't want this child then fine, it's your choice but I think you are perfect for motherhood right now."
"You really think we can make this work?"
"I think we can. I promise that I'll be happy whatever you decide."
"Okay, as long as you help me adjust to having a kid, then we'll have this one."
Two months later and Lisbon's pregnancy was starting to show quite obviously but at this moment she was sitting at the table in their kitchen, looking up at Jane with glassy eyes, trying desperately to keep her voice from breaking. "You don't want this baby any more, do you? That promise you made wasn't the truth."
Jane was taken aback at her statement, "What? I don't know where you got that idea from because I want our baby more than I ever thought I could. In my opinion your hormones are playing up bad today."
"Do not use my hormones as an excuse! You've hardly spoke about it since we found out and I feel as though you're trying to push me away. Just tell me if you're not happy any more, don't make another empty promise." She had felt as though he wasn't wanting to be near her more and more recently and no matter how much she cared about him she couldn't bear to be in a relationship what didn't mean anything to one of them.
"Please, darling, don't make me say it."
A single tear rolled down her cheek and whispered, "Get out."
"Teresa, that's not what I meant-"
He was cut off by her starting to shout again, "I said get out." There was no chance of him being allowed to explain himself right away so he turned his back to her and left her apartment for the second time in as many months.
Everything was different the day after their argument: Jane wasn't there by his own personal choice, Lisbon was angry at most people, for the first time in a while it wasn't because of her current condition and she was having the worst of her morning sickness. The rest of the team did not want to intrude on their boss' life even though they were all growing a lot closer now that there wasn't as many types of tension flying across the team.
When Lisbon got home she got a huge scare when she saw a figure sitting on one of the couches but calmed down when she recognised the blond hair, "What are you doing here? I thought we both made our feelings clear yesterday."
"No you made yours clear, you didn't let me finish what I wanted to say. I was trying to tell you that I didn't want to get too attached because... because the last time I loved two people this much they died and I can't let that hurt hit me or anyone else now."
"Do you not realise that you're a bit late to be saying all this, you should have said this before we got together Jane! You can't just erase all the memories we've made together or the love I have for you and even more so you cannot get rid of this child!"
Jane wandered over to the bed in the next room and sat down on it, avoiding looking at her completely, "I know I can't change anything, I just wish you could understand how much I want to be happy in this little family we're beginning to create but there's so much that seems to be against me having a good life that I don't want to even attempt it."
Lisbon couldn't bear to see the man she loved suffer this much pain so she couldn't resist walking over to him slowly and going down onto her knees to make it so that she was at almost the same height as he was.
"Jane- Patrick, I can't do this without you and for the past year your life has been pretty good by all expectations. I know we've had our ups and downs but we have always been there for each other and if you let me then, until I'm too big to see my own feet and in labour, I'll make sure that from now on your life will never be as bad as it once was. I love you Patrick, you can count on that."
Jane couldn't hide a little smirk at some of her words and took her petite face in his hands and kissed her lips so very softly, "Thank you Teresa but are you sure you want to do this?" She nodded and put her arms around his torso and rested her head on his shoulder as he gently stroked her cheek while his other hand travelled down to touch her baby bump. "I love you and always will. No matter how much I annoy you and teach our kid how to do mind-tricks that you hate I will never stop caring about you this much." That was a promise he couldn't risk breaking, he didn't want to and he knew that if it happened he would never heal from it because deep down he could see that this may be one of the best times of his life.
The End.
