Shades of early spring

Hyuga Hinata chooses her friends carefully. It has taken her a few months of cautious observation just to be sure she does not mind being friends with Uzumaki Naruto.

She has heard her classmates talk about him, and seen their parents frown at the sight of him. The boy is generally disliked, for an elusive reason none of her classmates seems to be able to, or care enough to pinpoint. Some say he is too stupid, some say he is too keen on playing pranks.

Hinata does not disagree with those who think Uchiha Sasuke is the brightest student in her class, but she cannot bring herself to look down on Naruto just because academically, he is the complete opposite of the gifted boy.

And his pranks… Well, he is not the only talented prankster in her class, and whether they like to admit it or not, the children do not laugh more at him than because of him. She wonders how they have the heart to make fun of the joker who amuses them every day. When Hinata laughs with them, it is with a heavy heart. She does not know why their laughter sometimes sounds cruel to her as she looks at their innocent faces. There is so much she does not understand about them.

And why is she different from them? Her white eyes look somewhat pensively at the boy. She knows she feels sorry for him, a sentiment none of her classmates (except Shikamaru) seems to share, and she remains silent. It pains her to think about it - the unmistakable difference - and be forced to feel out of place every time it comes to mind.

Already it is her third year at the academy, and yet she has never found a real reason to look forward to her time in school, except that it allows her to stay away from home temporarily. She finds herself at a loss for words, unable to explain it, even to herself.

Is something amiss? What is it? She is not unhappy in school. Her classmates are polite to her, even though some of them still find her white eyes rather unusual. She has no serious difficulty in coping with her schoolwork. She submits her homework on time and passes her exams. She does not sleep in class, nor is she tempted to ignore her teachers and chat away with her classmates. In short, she would say that she is neither Naruto nor Sasuke. She is the kind of student that teachers do not remember.

And she asks herself if she is silent because she is not remembered. She asks herself if she is just like Naruto at heart, longing for approval and acceptance… and she sighs, almost inaudibly, with a vacant look in her eyes. Sometimes she wonders if that is the best expression for her white eyes, so ironically expressive in their inherent blankness.

Has the whiteness of her eyes ever clouded her vision? Does she see differently because of her eyes? Does she think differently because of her eyes? Are her eyes truthful? Did they ever lie to her? Can they give her answers to all her unasked questions? Can she believe in the truth of what she sees - with her own eyes?

She hears voices. They say Neji has better eyes. They say Hanabi is a quick learner. Are their eyes sharper? Do they know better? Can she trust her own eyes when Neji's gaze seems sharp enough to pierce her? His gaze, burning desperately with an icy flame, robs her of her frail voice and feeble words, and leaves her speechless. "There is no need for words," his eyes seem to say aloud, "I've already seen it in you." When he looks at her like that, she falls silent, and looks away, and tries to forget about it. Then all of a sudden she wishes for noise, for people, for silly conversations, for anything that promises to startle her out of her reverie.

Is it alright, she asks herself, to graduate from the academy two and a half years later feeling as if she has at last woken up from a ridiculously long reverie, a reverie as long as the years it takes a little girl to walk all the way up from the ground floor to the roof of the building? Is it alright to have nothing memorable to remember? Is it alright to feel no regret at all when it is time to leave?

The sky is grey and the rain is indifferent. Slowly she walks out of her classroom, through the corridor, down the stairs, towards the main entrance. Surprised to see Naruto standing there, watching some children step out into the rain to meet their parents who hold an umbrella over their heads, she stops. He is unusually quiet, and his uncharacteristic quietness somehow distracts her from her habitual reserve, and she finds herself pondering over a possibility.

Is it possible, she muses, that something as trivial as a casual conversation with a friendless boy on a rainy March afternoon has some influence over her predictable, if not predestined, future? Destiny is too heavy a word on her lips, and she refrains from uttering it. "Predictable" is her preferred word. Predictability does not imply an absolute lack of freedom. Predictable is her life, and predictable is the weather. Right now it is raining… Raining.

"Do you think," says Hinata with mild curiosity, "it will rain tomorrow, Naruto-kun?"Naruto turns abruptly around, startled by her sudden approach.
"What…" says Naruto, slightly confused, "did you just say to me?"
"Will it rain tomorrow?" asks Hinata calmly.
Staring at her questioningly, Naruto answers, "I don't know."
"I hope… it won't," says Hinata with a faint smile, opening her umbrella, "see you on Monday, Naruto-kun."
"Wait! You - " says Naruto, "I don't know you… do I? Why did you…" and then he seems to recognize her face but fail to recall her name.
"I'm your classmate, Hyuga Hinata," she says with a polite smile.
"Hyuga Hinata… Hyuga…" Naruto looks at her intently as he thinks aloud, "Your eyes… You're the milky-eyed girl!"
"Milky?" says Hinata doubtfully.
"No one I know has eyes like yours," says Naruto without hesitation.
"You don't know my family, Naruto-kun," says Hinata blankly, "All my family has eyes like mine."
"All your family?" his eyes widen in surprise.
"I'm not the only one… I never am," says Hinata quietly, "and Naruto-kun, neither are you."
"Neither am I?" says Naruto with a puzzled look on his face.
"You're not the only blue-eyed boy in Konoha," says Hinata dispassionately, "you only think you are… because you haven't met the others yet."
For a moment Naruto looks at her, speechlessly, and then he says, "I haven't thought about my own eyes at all."
"You just told me what you thought about my eyes… and I'll tell you what I think about yours, Naruto-kun," says Hinata calmly after a pause, staring blankly into the rain-washed streets, "they are like the sky, cloudless and azure."