Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter, or any of the characters used here, apart from Brian Fisher.
A/N: This is just silly light-hearted story. If you're looking for angst, you're not going to find it here.
Enjoy xx

"Pretty good turnout, don't you think, Moony?"
Sirius Black turned to his friend, who was watching the room fill up with people with a despairing look on his face. The ballroom at Grimmauld Place had never been this full when Sirius' mother was alive, and that made Sirius laugh.
"Ha ha ha ha! Mwa ha ha ha-"
"Sirius? What are you…?"
"Hee hee hee hee. Ho ho ho ho!"

Pinching the bridge of his nose, Remus Lupin sighed, and remembered what he'd told his fellow Marauder earlier. "I'm coming. But just to make sure that you don't do anything stupid, like actually try to kill someone."
"Alright, everybody, listen up!" Sirius called out loudly and the room fell into a low hum of chatter.
"I'm just going to do a register, make sure that we know whose here, okay?"
There was a low murmured assent, and Sirius hopped up onto the table he'd brought in with him, dipping his quill in his inkwell, ready to write.
"Right, who've we got? Remus? Do you want to read the people out?"
"Not particularly. Fine. OK, so there's me, and you."
"I'm not an idiot, Moony."
"That's news to me." Remus muttered, smiling to himself. "Right, OK, we have…" He stared in a kind of awestruck horror at the group in front of him. "Amos Diggory. Igor Karkaroff. Severus Sna-"
"Hold up, Remus, I can't write that quickly. Igor…Karka…Karkaroff. How do you spell that?"
"It's K…A…R…K…A…R…O…F…F. Karkaroff." The heavily accented man said unctuously, twirling his goatee around his finger.
"OK, and then who was it?"
"Severus Snape." The man in question gave Lupin a mocking sneer.
"Sni…ve…llus…" Sirius muttered, scribbling furiously. "Next!"

"Cornelius Fudge and um…sorry, who are you?"
"My name is Dolores Umbridge!" The rather unfortunate-looking woman had a high, squeaky voice, and her cardigan…well, her cardigan needed to be burnt at the nearest opportunity. "How dare you be so insubordinate as to not know who I am? I am the Senior Undersecretary for the Minister himself!" She hissed, and Sirius laughed.
"I'm going to pretend that I care here, but I really don't. Next?"
"The Malfoy family."
"Ewww…" Sirius squealed childishly. "Remus, can we kick them out?"
"No. We can't."
"Really? Are you sure?"
"Yes. I am sure. We cannot kick them out."
Sirius huffed for a second, and then wrote their names down.
"Mundungus Fletcher."
"Oh, hiya Dung. How are you doing with those stolen cauldrons?"
"No one wants 'em. Apparently they're broken. What a lark."
"Moving on! We have…Barty Crouch Junior, and his house elf…?"
"Winky, Mister."
"Winky. And there's…Sirius, where did you put these flyers?
"All over Hogsmeade. And all over Malfoy Manor."
Remus sighed, rubbing his forehead. "Okay, so we have Voldemort and a few of his Merry Men."
"And woman!"
"Sorry, and woman. Lord Voldemort and his Merry Men and Woman."
"Vol…de…mort…"
"Lord Voldemort!"
"Oh, sorry, Lord Voldemort, and friends. Gotcha."
"And then we've got…sorry, who are you?"
"Brian. Brian Fisher."
"Right. So, Brian, if you don't mind me calling you that, what do you hate about Bumbledore?"
"He put me in the same room as you four for seven years!"
"Ah. Moving swiftly on! Lastly, we have Harry Potter!"
"Hello Sirius."
"How are you, pup?"
"I want to murder Dumbledore."
"That's the spirit! Now we know whose here," Sirius hopped off the table and waved his wand. "Welcome to the first meeting of…Dumbledore Must Die!" The walls changed to black with red accents, and a large poster behind Sirius' head read…well, what do you think it read?
DUMBLEDORE MUST DIE!
Sirius rubbed his hands together evilly, looking out at the small crowd.
"So…anyone got any ideas?"
The room erupted.

"Blow up his phoenix!"
"Suffocate him in whipped cream!"
"Uh ug ug uh!"
"Bore him to death!"
"Blood quill!"
"AVADA KEDRAVA!" Voldemort screamed, accidentally killing Brian.
"Rip his throat out!"
"Feed him food until he bursts!" Winky cried, and then immediately started hitting her head against the wall.
"EXPELLIARMUS!" Harry shrieked excitedly, and Sirius' wand went flying out of his hand and hit Peter Pettigrew square on the nose.
"Set fire to his beard!"
"AVADA KEDRAVA!" Voldemort screeched again, and Sirius ducked, narrowly avoiding joining Brian.

"Alright! Alright! I didn't mean about Dumbledore! Stop killing people! I meant, how are we going to get publicity for this? I mean, we want the public support, do we not? We can't exactly storm Hogwarts conveniently at the end of the school year because we care about the kids' education!"
"But how will they get jobs?" Voldemort hissed suddenly, looking hesitant.
"You shouldn't care about that! You're the Supreme Dark Lord of all! Voldemort! Captain Evil!"
"It's just that, I found it really difficult to find long-term employment, and it can really damage your self-esteem, you know. I…I found…" The Supreme Dark Lord of all sniffed, and Bellatrix patted him on the back comfortingly. "The red eyes…they put people off…and when they find out about the torture…oh! It's too much! We MUST wait until the end of the school year. We can kill them once they have some job opportunities on the horizon."
"Fine." Sirius grumbled, crossing his arms. "Any other ideas?"
"We could have t-shirts! And a logo! And a…a…a theme song!" Umbridge squealed, and promptly fainted, the excitement too much for her stone heart.
"That's BRILLIANT!" Sirius grinned at her unconscious form, and clapped his hands together.
"Let's get to work!"

Just to be clear, this will be a short, but multi-chapter fic.
Hope you liked it,
She-who-loves-fanfiction xx