Sybil's Prediction

This is an alternate version of my original, with a highly random ending.

Happy Victory Day, everyone.

Disclaimer: I don't own HP

The staff of Hogwarts was in the staffroom grading essays. Someone had filled all of their offices with Stink Pellets that had been cursed so that someone couldn't get rid of them magically, but for some reason, Sybil Trelawney's office didn't get hit. There was no need to call her to the staffroom, however, because she came of her own accord; a rare occurrence.

Minerva had finished marking her essays and was starting a game of chess with Albus when Sybil entered, breathing heavily, her magnified eyes wild. The teachers all turned to look at her as she dramatically raised a shaking finger and pointed it at Minerva. Some of them turned to look at Minerva, others remained staring at Sybil, and some looked between the two.

"What is it that gives you the need to point at me, Sybil?" Minerva asked in a bored voice, turning back to the chess board. Albus was watching his wife from across the board with an amused expression on his face, knowing full well her dislike of Sybil's subject.

Sybil spoke in a dramatic, mystical voice, "I was gazing into my crystal ball, wondering what mystery would roam the halls of this school next, when I saw…you!"

"Me?" Minerva asked in an uncaring voice, waiting for Albus to move his piece.

"Yes, you!" whispered Sybil, "You were in your bed…with a man!"

The effect was immediate. Albus started choking on the tea he was sipping; Rolanda Hooch, Aurora Sinistra, and Pomona Sprout howled with laughter; Septima Vector and Severus Snape snorted; Filius Flitwick squeaked and fell off his chair; and Minerva smiled slightly but no one saw. She glanced up at Albus who was smiling as he tried to recover from his choking fit. Maybe she can predict some things correctly.

They all turned to Minerva, and she started clapping slowly. Her colleagues gave her nearly identical strange looks. She wore an amused expression on her face as she said, "Congratulations. You have predicted something that I could have myself."

Mouths dropped open. Rolanda, Pomona, Aurora, and Septima all exclaimed at the same time, "What?"

"'McGonagall' is my maiden name. I do not use my legal name for safety purposes, so don't ask. So, Sybil, congratulations on making a real prediction even if I could have predicted it myself," Minerva explained. She looked at everyone, and so did Albus. No one was looking at him, though.

Their faces were too funny, so Albus started laughing. Everyone turned to him, and Minerva looked at him with a raised eyebrow, "Albus, what in the world is so funny?"

"Their faces!" he gasped.

She smiled, "I must agree; their faces were priceless when I told them."

"He knew?" Severus asked.

"Of course he did. I had to get permission for my husband to live here," Minerva answered with a small lie.

"He's here?" Pomona eagerly asked. "In the castle?"

"Yes, but you won't be meeting him," Minerva snapped. Excited faces fell.

"I must go check and see if my office is clean. Good day, everyone," she stood and made for the door.

Out of nowhere, Severus grabbed her hand, pulling her to him. He kissed her, and she pushed him away. She scowled and slapped him across the face, "I just said I was married, and you kiss me. There is something wrong with your brain, Snape!" She slapped him again for good measure and stomped out of the room.

Everyone stared at Severus, who was blushing and rubbing his red, irritated cheek. Albus was doing his best to keep his face unreadable despite the anger he felt at seeing a man, one of his employees, kiss his wife. Aurora asked, "Why in the world did you do that, Severus?"

There was no answer.

As I said before, a highly random OOC ending that's not meant to be taken seriously. I don't think I was quite in my right mind when I wrote this, but I can't exactly recall XD.