This is yet another part of my collection of Strange Meetings. It is another one focused on Johnny Depp, but after this, I'm taking a break from this actor and I'm going to work with some other ideas. For more info on Strange Meetings, go to my profile. I supply a full explanation there.
Some disclaimers: 1) The Charlie and the Chocolate Factory is listed as a book because I couldn't find the film's listing. 2) I don't own them. If I did, I would be a little too busy with Capt. Sparrow to write fanfic.
"Now Charlie, I know I've shown you most of the factory by now, but I realized that you didn't have a chance to see the boat yet."
Charlie stared at Willy. Though the older man had been becoming a little saner since apprenticing him, Wonka still managed to lapse into his odd ways.
"I have seen the boat," Charlie reminded him. "Remember, on the first day?"
Wonka gave one of his peculiar laughs which Charlie had yet to decide were natural or forced. "Silly boy, that wasn't the normal ship. That was the backup."
"Backup?" Wonka seemed to not hear as he led the way to the edible room. Charlie's house was on the end farthest from the chocolate river, so he usually didn't visit it. But today that wa where Wonka was leading him.
He stared in shock when he saw the ship awaiting them. It looked like a miniature pirate ship that would only need a one man crew. Upon closer inspection, he realized what the ship was made out of. "Is that a licorice pirate ship?"
"Black licorice to be precise. Yes, our captain was very particular about the color." Wonka explained.
"I call her the Pearl." A harsh voice said. Charlie turned and stared in shock at the man in front of him. Where Wonka seemed to be as precise as possible in his appearance, this man seemed to fear precision in his dressing, from his worn boots to his dreadlocked head.
"Greetings lad," the man gave a mock salute, "I'm Captain Jack Sparrow."
"You're not an Oompa Loompa."
"No he's not," Wonka expalined, stepping onto the boat, "but I did find him in Oompa Land. He was wondering around there looking for some whats it or nother..."
"A thieving, undead monkey, how many times do I have to explain that?"
"Isn't any monkey you have to chase undead?" Charlie asked, following his mentor onto the boat.
"You've been hanging with this eunich too long. You're starting to think like him." Charlie stared between Sparrow and Wonka, trying to tell if this eunich comment was serious. The more thought he gave it, the more plausible it seemed. He tried to force his thoughts elsewhere.
"So you're not an Oompa Loompa, but Willy found you in Oompa land?"
"Matter of fact he did. It was a few hundred or so years after I found that fountain of youth and I was hoping to find Calypso so I could get it reversed. But that stupid monkey stole my compass."
"At the same time," Wonka followed up, "I was trying to find new chocolate recipes. I had met the Oompa Loompas earlier that day. When I found Captain Sparrow, I asked him if he could supply any new idea."
"I suggested he mix some rum into it," Jack added proudly.
"So I brought Captain Sparrow along with the Oompa Loompas to the factory and had the river and the boat designed for him. In return, he crafted the perfect blend of rum and chocolate. Its become very popular at bars."
"A chocolate bar for bars?" Charlie smiled at this and Wonka nodded, glad his protige appreciated this joke. Turning his attention to Jack, Charlie asked "So why didn't I meet you on the first day?"
"I was ill."
"You were hung over."
"Bugger off. If you had wanted me around that day, you wouldn't have asked me to work on those tequila shot chocolate drops."
"Tequila shot chocolate drops?"
"You see Charlie," Wonka explained, "When I met Jack I learned that appreciation for candy doesn't just stay with the young at heart. Aldults were just looking for a different kind of candy then the young at heart. Beacuse of that, I recruited Captain Sparrow to help create candy for adults."
"When can I help make those?"
"When you're old enough to sneak into a bar." Sparrow said with a wicked grin.
Wonka gave a polite cough, "Just don't let the mother know."
"How bad could she be?"
"Remember that Elizabeth you told me about."
"Savvy." Sparrow muttered as he took the wheel.
Charlie watched the man as they sailed down the river. So Wonka,who happened to be a eunich, had an alcoholic, immortal pirate creating alchol infused candies. The only disturbing thing that had come from today's lesson was that this was one of the most normal lessons he had ever had.
This fic is dedicated to Aietradaea, who was so enthusiastic about this I couldn't turn it down. Also dedicated to Sevvie Lover, who gave me the idea of Sparrow being in charge of the ship in the factory, which became a much cooler idea then my time traveling elevator idea.
