Chapter Rating: M/R (Because of smutty goodness)
Warnings: Bandit!Regina, Thief!Emma, Whatever the Opposite of Slow Burn is, NSFW
Chapter Summary: A little game of Catch Me If You Can between two rogues.
Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters, or whatever the hell else. They belong to Disney, ABC etc, etc, I claim no rights to copyrighted material, and this story is purely for entertainment purposes.


The Sun hit her face, like a gentle caress coaxing her from her slumber. She stretched with a yawn, trying to keep the grin from her face, though the feat was proving impossible. With the memory of last night's events she would be surprised if anything caused her to frown. And just as soon as she thought it, she realized the other side of the bed was noticeably empty. That couldn't be right. She remembered going to bed with someone. Someone she thought had the good sense not to just leave without so much as a word.

"Emma?" she called out, sitting up in bed to look around.

"Regina…" a voice purred from the balcony doors.

There she stood dressed in a blue doublet, a white tunic, and dark blue trousers, brown boots coming up to just below her knees. In her hand was a silver necklace with a large amethyst on it and Regina fumed when she saw in Emma's hand. She had stolen that necklace fair and square. Well, perhaps not either of those things. But whatever happened to honor between rogues?

"I believe you have something of mine, Swan," she told the other woman.

And Emma smirked. "Funny, because I don't believe I do. After all, possession is nine/tenths of the law, Mills." She gave her a mock salute. "Thank you so much for a lovely evening, Regina. But I have to run. Bye."

Regina didn't think Emma was crazy enough to do it but she turned right around and jumped right off that balcony. She called after the other woman, but Regina knew it would be no use. Emma Swan, thief extraordinaire, was long gone.

Urgh… Regina hated her.

Ok, so given the fact that she was still very much naked and that she spent a lot of her time with Emma that way last night, perhaps hate wasn't the correct word. Still, there were times she couldn't stand her.

Like now.

Regina quickly threw on some clothes and swung her bow over her shoulder before she dashed out of the inn. She needed that necklace. Okay, so maybe considering her sizable stash she didn't need the gold that necklace would garner her. But this was a matter of principle.

No one stole from Regina Mills.

She quickly settled her debt with the innkeeper and retrieved her horse. Emma might have been good at running away. But Regina was fairly good at finding people that didn't want to be found. Though, she had to admit that Emma Swan always gave her a bit of a challenge. Perhaps this wasn't her first time trying to give someone the slip.

"You and Emma having a fight again?" the innkeeper's granddaughter asked as Regina mounted her horse outside.

"You can say something like that," Regina replied. "Thank your granny for her hospitality."

"Will do," the girl promised. "But Regina… Go easy on Emma."

The bandit smirked. "I promise that I most certainly will not go easy on Emma. She deserves everything that's coming to her."

Regina rode off. There was only a handful of placing she and that horse of hers, Beetle could get. And she'd find her eventually. If she had to search every square inch of this town and the surrounding forest, Regina would find Emma. There hadn't been a time yet where the bandit hadn't caught up with the thief.

She followed Beetle's trail through the woods. It stopped just outside of a cabin that looked like it had been abandoned for years. She dismounted her house and guided Rocinante to a nearby creek, because that's where she suspected Beetle was. Emma never tied down the feral, untrained beast so of course he wondered to the nearest source of water. And despite this, she had never seen Beetle wander off and never return.

But the bandit wasn't about to take that chance with Rocinante and she tied him to a tree near enough to the water so he could drink it. Then she took her gear, readied her bow, and crept back toward the cabin.

When she got to the door, Regina thought of a few ways she could have done this. Pick the lock and sneak in. Or kick the door in and start firing off arrows. But instead she tried the doorknob first. Something Emma would never consider.

Low and behold, when she turned it, the door swung open. And there Emma stood, her back to Regina, and her arms raised in a mock surrender.

"Turn around, Swan," Regina ordered. "I'm not going to shot you in the back."

Emma faced her with a wolfish grin, twirling the necklace around two of her fingers. "What took you so long, Mills?"

That cocky swagger of Emma's was always Regina's undoing. She loved that defiant streak in her. She loved that Emma never gave an inch. She loved how carelessly vexing she was.

And gods help her if Regina didn't want her here and now. She relaxed her shoulders, tossed her bow to the side, and rushed Emma, pulling her into a bruising kiss.

They assaulted each other, tearing at their clothes as they battled for dominance. And whether Regina won out or Emma relinquished control mattered very little when Regina slid two fingers through slick, soft folds, and sank into Emma as she had her trapped, sandwiched between Regina's body and the wall.

"Ah, fuck!" Emma shouted. "What happened to foreplay?"

"No time," Regina replied, as she began to drive her fingers into and out of the thief.

Emma trembled, moaning as her hips canting to meet Regina's ministrations. "Maybe — Fuck! — Oh, gods! — Maybe I wanted a little romance — Oh, fuck! — this time…"

Regina chuckled and trailed hurried and sloppy kisses along Emma's jaw, her neck. She took in her scent, the feeling of this woman clenching around her fingers, and the sound of her little helpless pleas as she unrelentingly thrusted in and out of her.

"Like this wasn't your plan along, Emma," she murmured.

"Guilty," Emma breathed, too lost to this carnal dance to put up a fight.

"What am I going to do with you?" the bandit purred.

"Make me come and then let me taste you," the thief offered.

"Tempting. We'll have to see."

"We'll have to see?" Emma groaned in objection. "You're killing me, Mills."

"You stole from me, Swan," the bandit countered. "That kind of thing isn't easily forgiven."

"I'll make it up to you," the thief promised. "Please."

"Will you now?" Regina gave a hum in quiet contemplation. "Maybe."

She set a pace that was steady but fast, too impatient to tease or draw this out. Regina could always do that again, later. But right now she needed to have Emma. Her center slickened with the thought, of tasting her, of being tasted by her. She wanted to the thief peak over and over again until they were both too tired and too sore to move.

"Oh, fuck. Harder, Regina."

Regina's lips curled in a victorious smile, apparently so did Emma. "An excellent suggestion. I'll take it under advisement."

Emma's eyes narrowed though her hips never stopped moving. "I swear to the gods…"

All Regina had to do was slow down just a tad bit more before Emma looked at her like a woman drowning and this was the only way they could say her. Regina couldn't help but gloat at that.

"I'm sorry, you were saying?" the bandit asked.

"I love you," the thief whispered.

"That's better, dear."

Emma was shaking in her arms, her legs struggling to keep her upright. She never looked more beautiful to Regina then when she was like this, quaking, panting, pleading for more; her face contorted in pleasure. She could feel her convuling around her questing digits, Emma's arousal coating them. Her lover's fingers were digging into Regina's back to keep steady as Emma tried to meet her halfway. She moaned and groaned and let out a litany of curses and praise. All of it sounded like sweet music to Regina's ears.

"You're close, aren't you, dear?" she purred, before she drew Emma's earlobe between her teeth.

"Nhn — Gods, yes," Emma panted. "I — I'm trying — to hold — to hold on — can't — so — so good — can't..."

Regina chuckled against Emma's neck before she sucked on the sensitive patch of skin just behind her ear until her lover cried out. "Are you going to get on your knees for me after this?" Emma nodded eagerly in response. "Are you going to let me fuck your mouth?"

"Yes — whatever you want — yes!" the thief whimpered. "I fucking love you."

"I know, dear."

And she did too. Regina loved her more than words could describe. Their love wasn't perfect. They didn't fit together like two pieces to a puzzle. They weren't two sides of the same coin. And neither them believed in fate, destiny, or True Love. So that was out. And what was left was this. But it was theirs and they'd kill — they have killed to protect it.

"Regina, I'm — I'm gonna…"

"I know. Please, Emma," Regina whispered, as her fingers curled inside the other woman. "I need to see it. I want to watch you."

And then time stood still when Emma's body snapped taut and her back arched as she announced her climax with a wail, crawling her nails down Regina's back as she came, becoming a shaking, boneless mess, as Regina guided her through it. When she calmed, slumping in Regina's arms, Emma's head lolled back and she had this look about her, like that cat who had caught the canary.

"Is that what you were looking for, my dear?" Regina asked as she slowly removed her fingers, delighting in the trembling sigh that she drew from Emma when she did so.

The thief nodded. "Yes."

The bandit chuckled, deep in her chest and then kissed Emma, who met her lips lazily, still basking in the afterglow. They kissed slowly with no real destination in mind. It wasn't like either of them had anything better to do in that moment. And it's not that they could pull away from the other if they tried. This was love. And it was theirs. And only theirs.

Regina used Emma's pro-orgasmic lassitude to the catch her off guard and flip their position, so she had her back against the wall with Emma looking at her with a wide eyed expression that soon turned to playful smirk.

"I love you."

"Less talking, dear…" Regina teased as she gently pressed down on Emma's shoulders, until she got the hint. "Not when I know better way for you to use your mouth right now."

"Work. Work. Wo-forumph," the thief grumbled as she knelt down, her words muffled when Regina cupped the back of her neck and guided her to where she needed her.

"Yes…" Regina hissed when Emma took her first taste. "Do it just how I like it."

Emma's eyes rolled up to meet Regina's. "Always."

Regina smiled back but rolled her eyes. "Less talking, more of the other thing."

The thief shook her head. "You're bossy."

The bandit frowned. "And you're an idiot."

"That is true, yes."

"Emma…?"

"Hmm?"

"I love you, too."


Notes if I continue this: If I continue this story it'll be a fun smutty action adventure fic with lots and lots of Swan Queen stealing stuff and celebrating by having naked sweaty time together.

This was a lot of fun to write. I hope you enjoyed it. Thank you for reading. And you can give me a follow on tumblr where I am Murderously Adorkable. If you haven't read my fic Strange Bedfellows and you enjoyed this one, give it a read. It's not completed yet but it's featuring a very similar dynamic though it's set in a modern setting. Anyway thank you again.

P.S. Don't write author's notes at 2 in the morning.