SOUTH PARK IS A CREATION BY TREY PARKER & MATT STONE, IT DOESN'T BELONG TO ME
It was becoming an unbearably long silence. The demon seemed to have forgotten about them and was just arranging his desk and papers as if they were invisible, as if he couldn't see both of them standing in front of him. Right when Chef was about to ask if he had called them over for a reason other than to look at him like a pair of idiots, the other raised his head and looked at them, hodling his own hands on the desk.
"You might be wondering why you are here."
"We certainly do, sir." Pip nodded.
They said that Hell wasn't good, eternal suffering and everything, but one got used to swimming in rivers of lava after a while and, even though his elegant clothes were a bit ripped because demons liked tormenting the guests, he had lost his worry soon after he found himself in that place. He found his long-lost parents there, Pocket was there, children he knew like Gordon Stoltski joined after some time, so why should he be worried in front of his hosts? Whatever they had in store for him and his former school chef, it couldn't be that bad. Still, he was intrigued about the reason why they, only them, had been called.
"You surely couldn't notice because we try to keep everything secret, not to worry our guests, but Hell is in a complicated situation right now. We are once again at war against Heaven."
The demon stood up and walked around the room with his hands behind his back.
"As you may know, being educated in the Christian religion, there will come a day when the Messiah will return to Earth to defeat evil and establish His reign of justice and peace, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah."
"Excuse me," Chef interrupted him, raising a finger, "but I've seen Jesus Christ in South Park for years. He's...been in Earth for quite some time, right?"
"Oh, yeah, you see, I am not talking about that Messiah."
"...What? Are there two Messiah now?"
"Not exactly. This one is even greater than Jesus Christ. His power is unlimited. According to the Christians, he will bring peace and glory to the world...But we are still in time to tempt this one successfully and bring him to our side."
"But why did you call us? What could we possibly do about it?" Pip asked.
"You know that after our Lord died attempting to stop the ManBearPig, things have been complicated down here. The heir is still adapting to his new situation and has ordered me to select among our guests people who knew the town and its inhabitants well, people who knew the target, people he could trust. Someone who won't cause trouble like those celebrities and murderers who can't just do their job without making a fuss. Since you two came here your conduct has been exemplary: you have participated in all of our activities and never caused any trouble. We are sure you'll do well."
"Wait, so...The Messiah is from South Park? He's been there the whole time?" Chef asked. "I thought he wasn't born yet or something."
"Oh, no, no, no, he was born ten years ago, but it is now when the profecy is to become true. It is now when he must take sides. That is why we have to act quick, before he chooses to ally with the forces of Heaven."
"And who is this person?" Pip asked with great curiosity.
As a response, the demon opened a file folder and pushed it towards them. The folder slid to Chef, who grabbed it.
His eyebrows raised.
"...Kenny?"
"Kenny McCormick?" Pip turned his gaze to the demon.
"Yes. Don't tell me you didn't notice."
"And don't you think the kid will freak out when he sees two dead people coming to him, as much as we used to know him?" Chef asked.
"You don't have to worry about that. You will have this."
Like a magician, he took something out of his sleeve: what seemed like a stony steak. He placed it in front of Chef and Pip.
"Our Lord has transferred some of his magic to it. It will allow you to change your appearance and invoke the forces of evil. It will help you if things get complicated."
Chef grabbed it and examined it carefully. The demon perhaps perceived his doubt, because he placed his hands behind his back again and said:
"Of course, you will be rewarded if everything turns out well. If I am not mistaken, you, Chef, were interested in joining our incubus army."
The black man raised his eyes to him with interest.
"Well...Yeah..."
"And you, little boy, our Lord hasn't forgotten about you."
"Oh, yes, good old Damien..." Pip nodded while smiling nostalgically.
"If you do this, he has accepted forgiving you about your past grievance to him."
"Will he? I accept then!" Pip said, even though he had this strange feeling that he had not done wrong to Damien but all the contrary?
"Well, then, if you both agree, then let's lose no more time."
"Wait! I-!"
Chef's protest was suffocated by a whoosh followed by what seemed like a flash of fire which blinded him and his little partner.
The heat and the light vanished as soon as it had been invoked, leaving the two undead disconcerted until they realized that the place where they were standing was not a hot place, agony screams couldn't be heard anymore and there was no light. They were standing in the open air park where, being no lampposts, one had to figure out where he was or was going by the silhouettes of the swings and slides.
Even without light, Pip remembered that place. He had played many times there, mostly alone because the other kids were never too kind to him.
They were back to South Park.
