Breaking Free
Part 1
Jane Rizzoli dreaded what was ahead. How could what she thought was the right thing to do, go so wrong. Eight years with Casey. The first three years were as a marriage should be, they both worked. Planned and started a family in year two. Neither of them realized that twins ran on both sides of the family so when the first ultra sound echoed back two heart beats, she was astonished. Happy, but still, twins were indeed unexpected. Nine months later much to Casey's chagrin, both babies were female. Everything was fine until, it just wasn't.
Jane came home early one afternoon having caught and interrogated a suspect which ultimately led to a confession. While in process of booking Cavanaugh insisted she go home and rest. It had been a long two weeks of chasing down every lead, knocking on every door and talking to anyone who thought they might have some good information on their, as of yet, identified suspect.
Luckily, postal worker delivering her route stopped and ask Jane if she was looking for someone. After Jane explained what was going on, the postal carrier told Jane about what she had seen around that time weeks prior. The information helped them identify and find Leroy Deerhound, age 34. With that plus other evidence and information, they nailed him. Instead of going out and celebrating, Jane decided to go home and cook a good supper for her family. She found that quality time with her girls, Sage and Brenna, helped calm and ground her more than anything or anyone, except for her best friend Maura.
Walking through her front door Jane already could tell something was up. The synergy in her home was off. Going with her gut, she pulled her service weapon and quietly searched the house ending at her bedroom door. Tilting her head she could just make out stifled groans. Thinking Casey was in trouble, she leveled the door with a swift kick. Entering with her weapon raised, it took her a moment to actually understand what she was seeing, a naked woman. A naked blond woman on her husband, who evidently was riding him like there was no tomorrow. It was the scream that brought Jane out of her muddled confusion. She blanked out her emotions and re-holstered her 9MM and told the woman to quit fucking her husband and get dressed. She wanted her gone before their kids got home from school.
Jane then turned and walked away. It was kind of satisfying to hear the woman yell at Casey that he should have told her he was married with kids. After some hushed protest from Casey, the crack of the smack she landed on, what she assumed was his cheek. That somehow satisfied Jane that the unknown woman had no clue that Casey was a family man.
When ruff angry steps stopped at the kitchen door, Jane turned and settled her gaze on the blond. With her blue eyes filling with tears, she told Jane she had no idea Casey was married. That he had said he was in town on leave. Furthermore, she would never go with a married man because her own father had ran off with another woman leaving her and her mother high and dry when she was a kid. Jane gave her a brief understanding smile and turned back to looking out the kitchen window above the sink. The front door clicked shut, signifying that the woman left.
Pulling her phone from its clip on her belt, Jane made a quick call to her Ma and asked her to pick the kids up at school and keep them until she came to get them. She frowned when her Ma told her that Mr. Stanley had asked her to work over until her relief showed.
There was a bustle of commotion on her Ma's side and when she came back on she told Jane that Maura was going to do it. Jane sighed, she knew they would be safe with her Best Friend, but Maura had her tells down pat. One look from her and she would know Jane was upset. Not having any other choice, Jane agreed.
Next call was to Tommy and Frankie. Cutting through the normal hello's, Jane went straight to the heart of the matter. She needed her brothers and she needed them now. Without hesitation they were on their way before the call ended.
Reaching in the refrigerator she started to get a beer, then thought wiser of it and grabbed a juice from the door. The crisp cold apple peach and pear did wonders for her parched throat. It was so dry; she would have sworn she had been in the desert for the past 24 hours. Hearing a shuffle in the hallway, she did not even bother to turn.
With a steady voice she instructed Casey to get his things and get out. Knowing his temper, she felt better when her brothers showed. They bypassed knocking and went straight in. The first thing they saw was Casey backhanding Jane across her right cheek and calling her an unfit wife. Both brothers moved quickly and while Frankie locked Casey's arms up in an arm bar, Tommy backhanded Casey as he had done to Jane. When Casey's head snapped to the side, a couple of teeth flew from his mouth. Blood dripped down the former service mans mouth down where it splattered on his bare chest.
Jane told them to stop and just take him outside and make sure he left. Frankie high stepped his sister's abuser outside and held him there as Tommy went to their bedroom and grabbed a shirt and the keys to Casey's Mustang. The youngest Rizzoli curled his lip in distaste at the smell of sex that was still hung in the air. He left to take the items to the man he once thought of as another brother, now he knew better. Casey was a person that did not ever deserve a woman as great as his sister.
Once Casey pealed out and raced off down the street, her brothers came back in. They both checked Jan's cheek and winced at the bruising along her cheek and at the black eye that was forming. Tommy grabbed a dish cloth and dug a pack of frozen peas from the freezer. Wrapping the cloth around it, he gave it to Jane. She could not help curse words that spilled from her mouth when the cold compress hit her injuries.
She shook her head; there would be no hiding this from her Ma or worse from Maura. Her best friend tended to take action first and ask questions later when it came to Jane. Maura took that turn of becoming Jane's protector when they had dated secretly for three months. In the end they both knew that if they were found out, it would ruin a lot of things.
Primarily, because of their high percentage of murder convictions, the safety of the city hung in the balance. Cavanaugh had caught them one evening in a heated make out session in the parking garage. They knew he had seen them, as he continued on towards them he made a lot of noise and of course they separated. When he came even with them, he made polite conversation which led into a brief story of two colleagues having an affair and because of that affair was found out, the lawyers that represented the murders from previous convictions filed a class action suit; claiming that they could have tampered with the evidence just to keep the officer's record of cases closed in good standing. With that he bid them goodbye with a smile, but the seriousness in his eyes let them both know they had just received their only warning.
They went back to Maura's house and upon entering and shutting the door; they just held each other in the darkness. Soon lips wandered as hands pulled clothing from their bodies. They made their way upstairs and fell onto Maura's bed. Jane took her time to pleasure her love. She was sad right down to her soul. Never would she be able to taste Maura like this again. Never would she smell the intoxicating scent of her womanhood.
Her tears started and soon so had Maura's. No matter how inflamed the passion was, the tears would not stop. They made love throughout the night, sharing everything, denying nothing. In the end right before the sun came up, they held on to each other desperately. Silently soaking up the love that was never to be.
Unable to let go, Maura held on tighter. Jane knew for the good of their careers and more importantly, for the good of Boston City itself, they had to separate. When Jane tried to move away her heart imploded. She went to her knees and remained there as the sobs racked her body. Maura slipped from the bed and rested on her knees in front of Jane, pulling her into another fierce hug.
Finally after they were both physically and emotionally exhausted, with their eyes and cheeks burning from being chapped by their salty tears, Maura leaned back and looked at Jane. No more words were said, just a quiet nod of agreement. With one last kiss that ended with one small chaste one on either cheek from Maura, Jane picked herself up and took in her lover one last time and then, Jane Rizzoli, who was in love with her best friend, Maura Isles, walked out. Since that night, neither had ever made love ever again.
From then on they had hid their love and on the day that Jane told Maura that she was Marrying Casey was the hardest thing the detective ever had to do. Maura took it well, but when she went home, she fell apart all over again. The Doctor knew it was going to happen. With Angela always on Jane's case about marriage and children, Maura knew it was just a matter of opportunity before Casey struck, which he did. Jane with her broken heart combined with the stresses of work and personal life simply gave up and gave in.
Time moved on and the wedding date came. Maura treasured the way Jane looked in her bridal gown. Unbeknownst to Jane, Maura had went to the Bridal shop and requested anything that Jane wanted should be within her best friend's price range. The owner agreed once Maura explained that she personally would pick up the difference plus 40% for the owner for going to the trouble of helping her.
It was a brisk, windy day that she watched Jane walk down the aisle. She was beautiful in her white gown. The detective paid $350.00 for the wedding ensemble, which was actually $9800.00 Vera Wang. The M.E. smiled and she held that smile as the vows were exchanged. Casey looked frustrated because when Jane said her vows, her heart would not let her look at him. Her eyes found Maura in the crowd and as she said line by line extolling the vow of her love, her eyes were locked with Maura's the entire time.
Then after the wedding, in a quiet corner of an out of the way empty room that Jane had quietly pulled her into, the two women held on to each other. Not saying a word, but knowing all the same that this should have been their day. Jane pulled back some and looked at Maura.
The misery she felt in her heart was mirrored back at her in Maura's searching gaze. Jane knew the marriage was a farce as did Maura, but regardless of feelings of sadness, need and desire; above it all was love. Realization of what had just happened, brought with it an excruciating pain that left both bereft of any sanity for a moment that allowed them close the distance and give in to the need of one final kiss; a kiss that would have to sustain both of their souls forever.
It would just be a few weeks later that Maura announced that the coroner's office in North Adams was understaffed and was being left without an M.E. when their current one left due to retirement. The detectives understood, but they did not like it. Maura announced that her second was going to take over Boston PD's M.E. position. While she would be out in North Adams, she would still be Chief Medical Examiner and yes she would be back as soon as a suitable replacement was found.
Naturally, Jane had found her later that day packing up her office and under the guise of helping; tried to figure out the true intent of her leaving.
Maura knew what the detective wanted. Tired of waiting, Maura turned and told her to just ask. Jane looked a little unsure, but did anyway. With a smile that was both honest and sad, Maura answered yes, she was leaving for a bit. She needed to so that she could settle her broken heart.
They were still best friends, but she needed her heart to catch up with her mind as for really leaving forever, she could not do that to Jane or to herself.
As sad as the situation was, Jane was still her only true friend. When they went to hug each other, they almost fell into the natural movement of kissing.
Being who they were and how they felt, it was hard to stop, but they did. Jane spent the rest of the evening helping Maura pack away her office. She couldn't help but to cry again when the last box was taped and loaded on a hand truck.
They looked at each other and by mutual reactions they met again in the center of the now empty office. With a steady look that held the Doctor's eye, Jane reached over and flipped the light switch off. When they were plunged into darkness, Jane tilted her head and took her best friend by surprise with a bruising kiss. The desire that had been carefully banked and hidden away, flared to life. It just felt so good to hold the one they truly loved once again in an impassioned embrace. For a few minutes they allowed the world to disappear. It may have not been fair, but this was their true love. It may be only battering their already ruined hearts, but they needed this. They needed to nourish the part of their soul belonging to the other. Breaking the kiss they held on more tightly. The love was still there, stronger than ever. They just could not be together.
A knock on the door brought them back to reality. They stepped away from one another as Cavanaugh turned the lights back on.
Stepping in he looked at the women. He could see the sorrow on each of their faces. Knowing there wasn't anything to be done about their situation, he said goodbye to Maura and good night to Jane.
His heart broke for them, but what choice did he have when they each carried such high profiles from within and outside of BPD. Sometimes love really just wasn't enough.
