Find Some Peace of Mind
(Tris POV)
I wake up in Tobias's apartment and even though he is not there I feel so happy I spent the night with him, even though it is not unusual. I don't know what makes me so much happier today. I sit up and dangle my feet over the edge of the bed where they just barely skim the ground. I have had a giddy smile on my face since I opened my eyes and I swing my feet back and forth a few times over the edge of the bed before getting up.
I put on a black dress that I got with Christina during initiation, so it's a little shorter than before, but it still fits! I quickly brush my short, blonde hair and exit the apartment with a skip in my step, but I don't really have a destination in mind.
I'll find out where Tobias is! "Four plus six is ten!" I sing to myself repeatedly as I bounce down the hall.
I peek into the tattoo parlor and scan for Tobias... nope! I do see Tori, though, and I vigorously wave hello, but she is too busy giving someone a tattoo to notice me. I move on.
Humming the tune of my made-up song of "four plus six is ten" I skip along, still smiling ear to ear even though the ground doesn't want to stay particularly still. Looking all around the Pit, I see Christina and decide to see what she's up to. Where was I going again? Oh well, it must not have been very important anyway.
"Christina!" I shout, dragging out all the syllables, as I approach her with arms spread wide and high as if I were about to hug her. She gives me a weird look and does not even say hello back. I frown at her.
" Hello, Tris..." she says awkwardly, her voice trailing off, slightly.
I giggle because I don't know why she is acting so strangely. She keeps giving me a weird look as if she does not know me!
I don't like that so I reach my index fingers to her cheeks and force them upward so that it looks like she is smiling. She looks so silly that I start to crack up, and this time Christina laughs with me, too.
"What are you doing, Tris?" she asks as her laughing quiets down.
"Um..." I try to remember where I was going, and she is probably confused as to why I am thinking so hard on that question. Then I remember, "I'm looking for Tobias! Have you seen him?" I lean forward on my tiptoes and plant my hands on her shoulder as I stare at her eyes expectantly, still smiling the same smile.
"Nope, haven't seen him," she replies plainly, giving me a skeptical look. "Why?"
I put down my hands tug on the hem of my dress as I am about to answer and just say, "I don't know," with a careless shrug.
"Huh. How about I help you find him?" She says.
I jump up and then grab her head with my hands and nod with excitement. Yay!
She furrows her brow but chuckles and swats at my hands. I pet her short, dark hair a few times and then drop my hands to my side again.
"Let's go," Christina rolls her eyes as she turns around but she still has a slight smile.
I follow along but then I see a pretty river. I stray away and lean over the railing. I like the sound of the rushing water so I giggle and reach out to try to touch it. Everyone around me looks at me strangely and does not seem to think the noise is a pleasant and funny-sounding thing. That's so weird, they're missing all the fun!
Just as I lift one of my feet off the ground to reach further to touch the water, Christina pushes it back down and pulls me away from the railing with a frantic expression and quick breathing. I scowl at her for interrupting my enjoyment. "What," she is out of breath as she speaks, "are you doing?!"
She must have sprinted over here from far away. I giggle. Silly Christina, I don't think the river is going anywhere.
"I was trying to touch the water, but you ruined the fun!" I lightly punch her arm.
"Ugh, Tris... what is wrong with you today?"
I frown at her in a confused way. I'm just happy.
"Let's go back to finding Four," she says. "We have a reason to find him now."
She starts to head away from the water and I follow her. Suddenly she turns around and grabs my hand. "No wandering off this time," and she pulls me along with her.
I start to sing "four plus six is ten" again, but I don't think Christina understands. Oh well, I keep smiling and singing anyway.
I follow her all the way to the Pire and I see Tobias talking to people just ten feet away.
I run ahead of Christina and raise my arms above my head as I shout, "Tobias!" He turns around and I wrap my raised arms around his neck and grin up at him. It feels so good to be touching Tobias. I just want to hug him and kiss him and never let go.
He and the group he was talking to suddenly start laughing at me so I pout and let go of his neck. I don't want to hug him if he is going to be so mean. "That's mean," I state, but that doesn't make his friends stop laughing, in fact, they laugh more.
Tobias smiles at me like I'm a puppy and pats my head as he passes by me to talk to Christina. He hasn't talked to me but instead is brushing me right off to talk to Christina. So mean! "Talk to me, not her!" I blurt out.
I just see him shake his head a little from behind so I go hug his waist from behind and press my face between his shoulder blades and feel his soft black T-shirt that is warm with heat of his body and also carries the same wonderful Tobias smell as his blankets. I bet his skin is softer than his shirt. I start to slide up his shirt with my hands that are wrapped in front of him, but he quickly pushes his shirt down and makes sure it stays down but my hands got pushed under his shirt when he did that. Oh well, I like the warm feel of his bare stomach so I keep them there. Since he is still walking towards Christina I try to move my feet at the same pace.
Finally, he stops and faces Christina. "Are you responsible for this?" she gestures at me with her arms.
I pat a rhythm on Tobias's belly. I'm not really paying attention to their conversation.
"It's amusing, isn't it?" Tobias laughs. What's so funny? I laugh because he is laughing. I like to hear his laugh. I love it.
"Not really, she almost got swept away by the Chasm because I didn't keep an eye on her for a few seconds!" Christina says.
"Oops," Tobias says carelessly. "Could have been worse, knowing what dangerous things she does even when she isn't loopy." He sighs when he says that but even though I can't see his face I think he is smiling.
"Anyway," Christina frowns, "What in the world did you do to her?"
Tobias chuckles, "I was able to obtain some peace serum from the Amity just so I could give it to her. Last time I was angry because I didn't know what was going on and it was a more serious situation and you know... but just as a joke, this is rather funny. I gave her too much on purpose, of course."
I move my hands in a circle over his tummy. Are they almost done talking? "I am getting kind of uncomfortable here, though." He adds to his statement as he pushes my hands off of his stomach and out of his shirt. Fine. I fiddle with his belt loops instead.
Christina shakes her head but smiles slightly. "Well, I'm gonna go ahead and leave her with you. How long does this last anyway?"
"It should last for about five hours, so maybe 3 or 4 more? I should probably just have her take a nap," Tobias says and puts his hands on mine. His touch sends a warm sensation through me and I want him to hug me, too. I want Christina to leave so that he actually will hug me too and stop talking.
"Enjoy yourself," she says shaking her head and walks away with a wave of goodbye.
I thought she would never leave. I move around to the front of Tobias's body and lift up my head to kiss him. He gives me a quick kiss and pulls away. Not enough. I reach up to kiss him again and this time he kisses me for longer. He pulls away and puts our foreheads together. I like the feel of our foreheads together, but not as much as our lips together. I start to lift my chin up but Tobias puts his fingers to my lips to stop my and just smiles and I hear him laugh just a little.
He starts to turn and go towards his friends who still think I must be quite hilarious for some odd reason, but have started to pick up a normal conversation again and I whine. I follow him over there, but he isn't over there for very long and quickly turns around and says goodbye to his friends.
"Let's go home, Tris." He says.
Home! I happily follow close to his side and hold on to his left hand with both hands.
Soon we arrive at the apartment and I pull him inside. As soon as he turns around after closing the door I hop up and peck his cheek.
"Why don't you take a nap, Tris?" He suggests, but I doubt it is actually a suggestion and more of an order.
"But I'm not tired!" I hang on to his shoulder and tug on his sleeve.
"I will nap with you," he offers.
"...okay!" I'd love to snuggle with him right now.
I climb into bed and he follows after. I wrap my arms around him and nestle my head right where his neck is so that his chin is on top of my head. Under the blankets, the smell of him, his shirt, and the sheets combine and I am overwhelmed with the scent I associate with safety.
Eventually I start to drift off, but right before I'm fully asleep I hear Tobias say to himself, "A peace serum that can drive others crazy. How peaceful."
He tightens his grip on my body momentarily and whispers, "Even if you make me lose my peace of mind, I will love you no matter what, Tris."
I smile, "I love you, too, Tobias." I feel him smiling and drift off.
