I've managed to stay in the shadows so far. But it was clear soon it wouldn't be good enough, not for someone like me. I heard the stories of people dying to be able to blend in with wallflowers easily as I could, I knew some of those were legit stories, but I also knew that as soon as they'd turn invisible, they would already feel the void. And they would end up in a clinic or killing themselves. I have been through both, and not that being popular matters in its essence, but wallflowerism should be abolished. You won't get the peace you long for, you'll just grow scarce of social interactivity and depression is always a step too close.
Well the thing is: it's an individual choice to some (as everything in social life), but me? I was dragged into this shit and I'm the wallflower queen. And that leads directly to my honorable Queen of the Creepers self-title. Creeper queen. Fits me like nothing ever dared in this world of mine.
Looking around the school campus focusing really hard on the people for the first time, I could see lots of groups of pretty girls giggling and chatting excitedly. There were less groups of guys, and they didn't seem to talk much unless between the talkative nice pieces of ass females. All dressed up in their proper uniform. I didn't wear those skirts, their largest sizes still made me uncomfortable lenght-wise. They could walk around showing their panties for all I care, it was indeed a nice view, but I wouldn't.
Something inside of me told me they wouldn't be giving a single fuck about the wallflower queen. Are they even aware of how easy it'd be for me to shoot them all dead? Probably are, but hey, gonna hang around empty walls, spread my roots and light a cigarette. I would be punished for this and catch some attention, and I would say I'm sorry, enjoy my punishment, and keep on trying to be a nerd so I could study forensics. I don't consider myself an attention whore, and here I was making a smoke sign for someone. Anyone. Though in reality the cigarette made me calm my paranoic nerves and not care about things. Powerful little cancer roll, ja.
