Finding the Way

Lily sat by the fireplace, the tears flowing from her emerald eyes hitting the front of her uniform. This was not the way she had thought her seventh year would be. She had dreamed of becoming head girl, since she was in her first year. When she had finally received her letter telling her that she had done it, she had been overjoyed.

She had made so many plans to improve the school. To try and take the school back to the time when she had been in her first years of Hogwarts. Now instead of the happiness and joy, there was darkness, and terror. No one was safe. Even when at Hogwarts, family members of students were being murdered at every step and turn. There was no cheering up those who had lost so much.

She had tried, put her heart and soul into it too. At first there had been small successes. Students smiling at the many efforts she had made. The dances and shows she had put hours into, had made a slight change. The students would smile and laugh hours afterwards.

At least they had until another attack would come along. Than it was back to the planning board, she had tried to come up with new and exciting ways to make Hogwarts life worth living, at least she had tried until this morning.

Dozens Dead, Unknown Number Missing

That's what the headline had been on this grim day. Her own best friend had lost her aunt. She was off somewhere comforting her cousins. Trying to tell them that they could get through this, though if that was possible, Lily had no idea.

She was giving up. After today there was no point. How could anyone come back from such a tragedy?

That's why she was sitting there now. She was distraught, scared and lonely. She had put all her time and energy into helping others she had left no time for herself.

James Potter was the only one who had made a difference. Most of her friends had seen all her hard planning as a lost cause. Not the head boy though, he had been behind her a hundred percent. He had even taken care of all of there regular duties, patrolling, scheduling prefects, everything.

They were friends. That's all she would say on the matter. He had grown up, and was a really great friend, who was always there when she needed him. That's it, friends. Friends who think their friend is hot, at least to her, he was, though she hadn't admitted it to anyone. He hadn't even asked her out once in the five months they had been at school. So instead of making a complete and utter fool of herself she kept her mouth shut and just concentrated on being friends.

Her tears finally dried. She had no more left to cry. The horrible part was, she knew she was not the only one shedding tears. She wiped her eyes.

"Were you crying?"

Lily looked up into James Potter's hazel eyes. "Just a little," she said looking quickly away.

"It's ok to cry, you know," he said looking deep into her green eyes, "What are you going to do, to cheer everyone up?"

"Nothing, I give up, there's no coming back from this low, and its pointless now."

"Nothing's pointless; you just need to find your way back, so you can help others."

"And how do you propose I do that?" She asked genuinely confused. What was he talking about she wasn't lost everyone else was.

"Come on, I'll show you," he stood up and held out his hand. "You just need to live a little. I promise you in 12 hours, you will know how and what to do to make this school better. No one lives forever; let me show you how fun it is to live, than you can help the school live to."

She took his hand and followed him out of the common room.

It was eight at night and she wondered what he could show her in a few short hours. After walking for ages, in no generally direction she couldn't take it anymore.

"Where are we going?"

"You'll see, here close your eyes I want this to be a surprise."

She did as she was told. Before she knew what was happening, he had her hoisted up over his shoulder.

"What are you doing?" She squealed.

"Wait and see," he laughed.

Eventually, after what felt like hours too her, he set her down. She looked around. He had brought her to the Quidditch Pitch, she should have known, though something didn't add up.

"Why did it take so long to get here?"

"I wanted you to get lost," he shrugged, "and I liked carrying you around."

She looked away quick, that had been the first reference to how he felt in months, and it gave a thrill of hope inside. She looked at him and realized he was holding a broom in one hand.

"No way, there is no way I'm going to ride that broom."

"Well, you could always ride a different broom," he said with a smirk, wiggling his eyebrows at her. She was speechless, she had been waiting for months to hear the familiar lewd comments come from his mouth, and when she was least expecting it, there it was.

He continued before she could say anything. "Just so you know I'll be on the broom with you so you won't fall, and were going flying, not riding, HUGE difference." When seeing her expression, he didn't let her say anything. "Let me show you things, you've never even imagined you could see before."

"Alright," she agreed in quiet voice.

"Now climb on, and no talking. Just enjoy," he said seriously.

She climbed on the thin handle, and felt him climb on behind her. He wrapped his arms around her to hold onto the broom handle in front. The feeling she felt with his arms around her was unexplainable. She felt safe and protected. She hadn't felt like that since before the death of her parents in third year.

James kicked off suddenly, she pressed back into his chest, hating the lack of ground beneath her feet. They were whizzing through the air. She could see the faint outline of the sun setting in the west. The tree tops were brushing her toes. All of a sudden they were beyond the forest.

Her breath caught. The view was the most amazing thing she had ever seen in her entire life. The way the sun glowed over the trees, the castle lights shining on the nearby water, and the darkness of the mountains to the east of them, was all too much for her to handle.

"Oh my god James, it's absolutely breath taking."

"Shh no talking, remember," he breathed in her ear.

He flew the broom down closer to the water. As he leveled out he took her hand in his, and held it out to the side. She grabbed it back and held on tighter to the broom.

"Let me," he whispered.

Slowly giving in he took her hand again, than he took the other and held them out. The wind was still whooshing through her hair, she felt more alive than she had in months.

James brought both hands back in after a few moments, he placed one hand back on the broom. But the other hand he leaned them both close to the water. Than he shifted and suddenly their fingers were running through the water. The cold water flowing through their fingers, it made her smile.

She turned her head to look at him. James smiled back. Than the strangest thought occurred to her.

James was right, they didn't live forever. Today had proved that, the ministry and been assuring everyone that the situation was getting better, and obviously it wasn't. So Lily did the one thing she though would matter most, and if she didn't do it, she would regret it for the rest of her life.

She kissed him.

She pressed her lips against his, she could feel his surprise. He quickly pulled away.

"Lily won't you regr…"

"Shh no talking, remember," she said quoting him, her lips brushing his with every word.

That was all it took. He pressed his lips to hers. Their lips molded together, slowly she open her mouth to his and ran her tongue along his lower lip. His mouth opened with hers and he put his tongue inside, together they deepened the kiss.

She didn't even realize that he had flown the broom over to the shore and moved so she was pressed against a tree.

Her hands were wrapped in his messy hair that she had always hated so much, though now she couldn't seem to get enough. His arms were wrapped around her waist, constantly pulling her closer, though they were as close as possible. Their bodies pressed together entirely.

Eventually James pulled away, grabbed a quick breath than began kissing his way along her jaw bone. Lily shuddered moving her head so that he had better access.

"I'm so sorry for the way I used to treat you," she muttered, her eyes closed, head pressed against the tree, fingers still laced in his hair.

James stopped kissing her neck, and looked at her, "Believe me, I'm over it," he said with a grin.

Lily smiled, and pressed her lips against his again. The kiss was different though. It still had the same amount of passion as the other kiss. This one was more delicate, caring, and slow. The first kiss had been a mad desire to just have as much as they could get of each other, though with coats on and snow everywhere, they couldn't get as far as they would have liked too.

Twenty minutes later James was pulling Lily back on the broom.

"We need to keep going, I have a bunch of things planned," James was saying as he pressed his head against her neck and kissed it.

Lily just nodded her head was too lost in the thoughts of James' kisses. She didn't pay any attention to where they were flying; all she could think of was his arms wrapped around her waist.

Eventually they landed in Hogsmeade. James hid his broom behind a shed and pulled her into the Hogs Head.

"What are we doing?" She hissed under her breath.

"Letting loose," he said pulling her to a table. He left and went to the bar and was quickly back with two drinks.

"What is this?" She asked looking at the fairly large glass.

"No questions, just drink," James said with a smile.

She looked at him for a few seconds than shrugged; there was no point in arguing. She had a feeling there was no getting out of drinking whatever was in front of her. She took a sip and sputtered.

"What is this?" She asked still coughing.

"Firewhiskey, just keep drinking. We aren't leaving until that's done. Plus it tastes better after a few sips, you'll feel better too," he smirked at the last part.

She looked at his glass and realized his was half gone. She bravely took another sip, he was right; it was starting to taste better.

"You aren't trying to get me drunk now are you?"

"I don't need to get you drunk," he smiled, leaned over and kissed her. "Its just fun to let loose once and a while you know."

"Yeah, well I sure feel loose." Her glass stood empty.

"Come on lets walk back," James said standing up.

The walk took three times as long as the normal one would. It didn't help that Lily was drunk out of her mind and James just beyond being slightly tipsy. It also didn't help that all along the way they would stop and snog. When they reached the gate, they climbed on James' broom again and flew over the fence.

"What's next?" Lily whispered not so quietly.

James just took her had and pulled her down a deserted corridor. He stopped at the end of it and used her fingers to tickle the pear. Lily giggled right along with the pear.

"Now we need to sober you up, and I guess I need to as well a bit," James pulled Lily through to face an army of house elves. "Two coffees and a pitcher of water, if you would mind."

"Not at all Sir, we would be honored too."

"Ok Lily," James said turning towards her, "How about a game of Never Have I Ever."

"Sure, sounds fun," she said with a giggle, sipping the newly delivered coffee, not feeling the effects at all. "You go first though."

They both held up ten fingers. James went first.

"Never have I ever, been a prefect." Lily shot him a dirty glare and put one down.

"Never have I ever, been a pureblood."

"Ok let's not purposely set out to make each other lose, agreed?" Lily nodded. "Never have I ever, had any siblings."

Lily put down a finger, "Older sister, Petunia."

The game continued on for a few hours, after a while they both stopped counting and just played the game. A few never have I ever stood out. Lily's never had sex, James than had to explain that it was meaningless and he regretted it immensely. Or James' never had a serious girlfriend.

Both had never been in love. Though Lily didn't really know the feeling she had right now for James, all she knew was that it was strong.

Soon they were headed back to common room. Both much more sober than when they had entered the castle hours ago.

"Would you like to see the sun rise?" James asked once they made it to the common room, it was a little after five, and it would be rising soon.

"Sure, where can we see it though?"

"Oh I know of a great place." James said pulling her along towards the boys' dormitories. Lily stopped at the foot of the stairs realizing where he was taking her. "Come on its fine no one will see you, I promise," he looked at her for a second, than leaned down and kissed her.

Once they reached the dormitory they crept in, though there really was no need the snoring was so loud. James pulled her to the window and yanked it open and crawled out. Pulling her with him he settled on the ledge and she sat next to him. Once she was comfortable he put his arms around her, and laid his head on hers.

It had been the most romantic night for both of them, and it hadn't even started out that way. It had started out as James showing her that there was reason to still enjoy life. It had ended with something that neither one of them could expect.

As the sun broke through the trees Lily looked up at James and whispered the three words that would forever change their lives.

"I love you."

James looked at her for a second, than kissed her so fiercely, she thought she was going to die and go to heaven right than and there.

"I love you too," he whispered.

They climbed back through the window, and James led her to his bed. He drew the drapes and put a silencing charm around them. They lay there kissing for a long while, but eventually the kissing grew deeper and than Lily was pulling off James' shirt, his hands were under her shirt and they were both panting helplessly.

"Lily I…" James started but was cut off by Lily.

"James its ok, I want this, I want you."

That was all he needed to hear. Before long all their clothes were off and they were a tangle of limbs, heated flesh, and passionate kisses.

It was all new to Lily, the feelings, the emotions, the physical need. She was withering beneath the kisses that covered her entire body. She had never realized she could have this effect on someone.

Soon they were both moving in time with one another. The feeling of pain and passion mingled together. His mouth was everywhere. Leaving a hot trail where ever it had been. There was a building feeling inside her, and she didn't know what to think only that it felt good and that she wanted it to last for a long time, yet she wanted more as well.

All of a sudden she felt like she had exploded with so much intensity, that she couldn't hold in the moan and the gasp that escaped her mouth, but she didn't care, she needed James, and he was there, moaning along with her, kissing her neck.

After they had both come down from their highs, she leaned over and kissed his cheek, "I love you," she murmured before sleep overtook her.

She stirred after what felt like minutes though she knew it had to be more. She opened her eyes to find a pair staring back.

"Good afternoon, sleepy head." James whispered, pulling her closer.

"What time is it?"

"Around four, I think," James said though quickly continued noticing her shocked face. "Though when you really think about it, we fell asleep after seven this morning so it hasn't been that long of a sleep."

"Won't people come looking for us?"

"I think everyone is slightly preoccupied by yesterday's events."

"Yeah I guess your right." Lily said sitting up, and stretching.

"Where are you going?" James asked pulling her back so that they were spooning. He lightly laid kisses on her neck.

"To go plan, we need to get the school back on track, you coming?"

"Yeah, I'll meet you down in the common room; here use this to get down. It's an invisibility cloak."

"Thanks," she smiled leaning down and kissing him.

She went to open the door, but someone beat her too it. Sirius walked in but stopped dead in his tracks. A grin slowly spread across his face. He nodded to her the smirk still present. As she walked out the door throwing the cloak over her, she swore she her him saying "Way to be James."

A while later they were both sitting in the common room working on new ideas to get past the dark times when a thought occurred to Lily.

"Not only did you help me realize, that I could still help the school but you also made me realize that I love you," she smiled at him.

"Totally my plan all along," he said leaning over and kissing her.

"I'm glad, I'm so glad." And she smiled knowing that whatever came their way, she would be able to make it as long as he was by her side, finding their way together.

The End


This is the same story from before, I've just gone trhough and re-edited it. Hope you like it!

Review!