A/N: Holy crap... This is freakin' awesome... I just came up with the greatest idea known to man-kind! This is the next best thing since sliced bread! I know you probably think the 'characters singing songs' idea has been pitched too many times, but get this... What if instead of making the characters sing... I make them rap!? YEAH! Anyway, I hope you get a kick out of this... it was fun to write! This is as white as it gets people... here it goes!
Reikai Tantei Rap!
By gangling freak
Rated PG: for Lang.
Yusuke, Kurama, Kuwabara and Hiei have all made a visit to spirit world and are about to undertake a new mission... but apparently... the mission is not to kill anarchy-obsessed demons... but rather entertain them at a local reikai bar!
"This is insane..." Hiei stated bluntly. The others nodded in compliance. They had all been summoned from human world by his royal toddler-ness, Koenma, to stand-in for the band that was supposed to be playing at the bar.
"Darn Koenma! What the heck are we supposed to do? Does he want us to get up there and juggle tennis balls on a uni-cycle or something?!" Kuwabara bursted out randomly. They all eyed the crowd of demons that were glaring menacingly at the four boys, awaiting there entertainment.
"Perhaps we should think of something before this crowd begins to riot... any bright ideas?" Kurama stated softly, looking at the others. Suddenly, Yusuke's face lit up with an idea.
"Oh! Holy crap, I've got something!" Yusuke beamed, slapping his hands together for emphasis. The others looked at him curiously. Yusuke walked over to a demon running the sound systems and whispered into his ear. The demon nodded and motioned for the boys to step onto the stage.
"What did you do, Detective?" Hiei looked at him hostilely. Yusuke merely gave the koorime a sly smirk and pulled him onstage.
Once the boys were on stage, a strong beat began to boom out of the speakers. Kurama, Hiei and Kuwabara all looked at Yusuke for answers, but the detective only pulled out a random baseball cap and placed it on his head sideways... then he began...
Yusuke-
Yo! This here is the Reikai Tantei rap! Here it goes!
Break it down!
Urameshi's my name and I'm a tough guy
The number one fighter in Sara Jr. High
Yeah, I'm an outcast and I don't like school
Out here on the streets is where I rule
My dad's a no-show and my mom's a drunk
It's no wonder I became such a smart-ass punk
I ain't gotta impress, ain't gotta win the race
So don't mess with me or I'll break your face!
Yusuke looks over at Kurama to start in with his verse. The fox looks a bit reluctant at first, but eventually he caves to the beat...
Kurama-
The name is foxy 'K' and I'm game to play
The girls come up to me every day
They say, ((in his best girly-voice!)) "Shui-chan! I'm your number one fan!"
So then I step back as fast as I can
And say, "Whoa miss, you're moving to fast!
It seems like all you want is a piece of my ass
Well, there's no way you're getting in my pants
At least, not unless you're in it for romance!"
The ladies cheer violently. Kurama ends his verse by throwing a rose out into the crowd and then Kuwabara steps up...
Kuwabara-
Big Kazuma here and I'm real cool
I try really hard not to play the fool
I love to go out and to kick some tail
Just the sound of my name'll turn you pale
I fight for honor; I fight for love
I fight for Yukina, my beautiful dove!
Er...pause
Yeah, my shirt is blue and my hair is orange
And I... wait... nothing rhymes with orange...
The others give Kuwabara the usual 'What in the world are you talking about' look and he sheepishly steps down... Then they all set their gaze on Hiei... who says nothing... The music stops abruptly and then Hiei speaks...
Hiei-
Fools... ((crosses his arms))
All ((except Hiei))-
WORD!!!!
The crowd stood up and clapped loudly. There were several hoots and hollers combined with, "Kurama's hot!" and "Father my children Hiei!" ((remember... their in reikai after all...)) The four boys bowed and waved at their adoring fans as they walked off stage... They were greeted by Koenma.
"Well! That was certainly creative!" The toddler smiled greatfully, "I'm glad I called you four in for this one!" Yusuke smiled proudly.
"Yeah, I know... I'm great!" He crossed his arms narcissistically. Kurama glanced at him and then at Koenma.
"I'll admit it was quite fun being up there on the stage... Perhaps you should call us again for this job." The fox smiled brightly. Yusuke looked at Kurama and smirked.
"Yes... next time we'll do an overly elaborate and dramatic routine to Bohemian Rhapsody!" He rubbed his hands together and laughed. The others, including Koenma, joined him in his laughter... This had certainly been their oddest mission yet!
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Oh yeah! That was fun! I liked coming up with raps for the reikai tantei! I especially liked Kuwabara's! He's such a dope, but he's funny as hell! Well, I hope you enjoyed this little piece here and please, for the love of god, review or I will explode! ((Well, not really, it's all hype....)) Later!
-GF
