Spoonerine and Napkin Boy: The Origin Story
It was just an average day at Utensil High.
Scoopula Heyzues, a brunette of little note beyond her distinctive and aggressive sideburns, was sitting at a lunch table with her friends, talking and laughing. One of her blonde friends was going into detail about her erotic feelings for a certain history teacher when it happened: disaster struck. Her gorgeous Brunette friend Ebeccar had brought dry cereal for lunch... but she had... no spoon! The friend tried to scoop it into her mouth with her fingers, really she did, but it was to no avail. Ebeccar kept trying, and trying but no matter how fast she scooped or how wide she opened her mouth, she couldn't eat her cereal.
Scoopula was forced to watch as her Ebeccar exhausted herself, as her head drooped, and as she slowly fell face first into her plastic bowl. Ebeccar floundered and her body flopped around on the table as she slowly drowned in her cereal. Scoopula and her friends were paralyzed with fear, what should they do?! Her friend was drowning in the food that had once given her life so much happiness. To make it worse, her body was being sucked into the bowl. The cereal had eaten her body.
"NOOOOOOOO!" Screamed Scoopula. Watching her friend disappear broke the paralysis that had held her in place. She ran to her friend and tried to pull her out of the cereal bowl, but Ebeccar was in too deep. Scoopula plunged her hand into the bowl and managed to grab a foot. She pulled and pulled but the cereal was to heavy, and Scoopula was to weak.
In a moment of blinding clarity Scoopula started to punch the cereal. Maybe if she could just pulverize it, her friend could be freed?
*Shing*
Scoopula screamed in pain, her knuckles had burst open. It felt like the bones in her hands were leaping out of her hands. And in a way they were. There were three bones emerging between her knuckles, like daggers. But there was something odd about these bones. They were scooped at the end.. like... like spoons!
There was no time to worry about that right now, Scoopula had to save her friend. She scooped at the cereal with her new scooped appendages. She scooped as fast as could. Great heaps of cereal flew over her shoulder and hit bystanders in the face. There! she found her friends hair. She was close. She kept going. Soon her friend was free. Scoopula pulled her onto the table and pumped her chest, cereal flew everywhere. But it wasn't enough, her friend had died.
"NOOOOOOOO!" Screamed Scoopula again. Only then did she realize that the whole cafe was staring at her, no not just at her, at her bone spoons. Scoopula unclenched her fists and felt the spoons retract into her hands, the cuts healing as if by magic. Scoopula fled the cafe
A month later
Scoopula was living out of a trash can, she had been for weeks. She was too scared to return to the school yard and face the people who knew she was a freak. While she had grown accustomed to her mutation, the bone spoons and her super healing, she knew that others wouldn't adapt so quickly.
"Scoopula? Scoopula HeyZeus?" Asked a man framed in the light of the alley, his face dark. "Who's asking?" Asked Scoopula all sassily. "Nick Fury." The man stepped into the light and it was revealed that he was a strong independent black man. "What do you want?" Asked Scoopula. "I want you. I want your power." The man responded. "What could you ever want with a freak like me?" Wondered Scoopula. "I want to make you better. Stronger and faster. Afterwards, well, maybe you can help me with a few things." "What kind of things do you want me to do?" queried Scoopula, worried. "I was thinking afterwards you could help your country by fighting crime." Said Nick Fury, as the soundtrack escalated.
Scoopula thought about it, she did, but she decided against it. Society had shunned her (not really, she shunned herself, but super heroes are always really whiney), she owed it nothing. The man said "I can see your decision written across your face, and I won't try to change it. I just hope that the next time someone is drowning in cereal, there's some hero around to save them." Then the man walked out of the alley. Scoopula felt like the man had struck her across the face. She owed it to her brow haired friend to do as this man said and become a hero, she owed her.
"Wait!" She called after the man "I'll do it". The man grinned towards the camera, letting the audience know that he had known she would do it all along.
A few months later.
Today was the day of Scoopula's operation. They were going to make her into a hero. They were going to cut into her body and fuse her bones with plastic, this would make her stronger, buoyant(er), and allow her to scoop things better then she had ever scooped things before.
"Your operation has been a huge success, now all you need is a kick ass super hero name." Said Nick Freakin Fury as he visited Scoopula in her hospital room. "Well, i'm like a wolverine, I have long claws and I heal quickly. But I have spoons, not claws. Call me... SPOONERINE"
End of Origin Story Part 1. If you guys review, or just view in general, I'll add Napkin boy's back story.
