Misadventures: Naruto
Chapter: 1
Written By: Slade963
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto… nor am I responsible for any minors who read this fic. I strongly suggest only readers above the age of consent (and those with a good sense of humor) read this fan fiction.
AN: Yo… so yeah, I needed to write something fun for a change, and since I just finished reading an enjoyable short 7 chapter fic about a gaming Naruto… I thought why not give my own spin to the idea?
Anyway as you might have deduced from the summary and name, this fic will be all about misadventures and hopefully (certainly :3) some really funny moments. Naruto will start out as the same idiot (and I don't mean this in a bad way this time) and will be thrown into situations that will either lead him to trouble, rewards, trouble, allies or new adventures… o and trouble! Also this fic is rated M for a reason, and I made Naruto 14, because 12 was just a little too young and since I was a hormonal mess at 14 I thought let's go for it.
How the game started, will only be revealed in the epilogue… so yeah that's about it
BEGIN STORY:
Naruto groaned when sun light shined through his eye lids, and woke him up, "Uhhhhhghhhh…" He stretched his arm out to close the curtain, but found that he couldn't reach it. Huffing in annoyance he sat up, still with his eyes closed, and rubbed his face to fully wake up. He yawned and stretched, and then finally he opened his eyes, ready for the new day. "Good morning world, your new Hokage has…" He stopped when he saw black writing in the air, just floating in front of him, and his eyes went wide from surprise, "What the…"
You have been fully rested; Health and Chakra have been restored to maximum capacity.
He swiped at the words, and was amazed when they simply disappeared. "Man I must be hungry if I'm seeing things that aren't there!" He completely ignored the fact that he just saw floating words and jumped out of bed. "Time for some morning ramen…" He smelled his armpits and recoiled when the stink hit his nose, "…yip, and a shower."
He laughed to himself and walked out of his bedroom, not even bothering to tidy up his room before he left. Naruto walked in to the kitchen and opened up a door to a cupboard, taking out his last cup of instant ramen. "Looks like I'm out…" He shrugged and prepared his last cup of ramen, "…I'll think of something later! For now, it's ramen time!" His mouth watered as he looked at the now finished ramen that sat before him, he inhaled deeply, taking in the smell before breaking his chopsticks apart and devouring the cup of ramen.
Not even a minute later, the ramen cup sat completely empty in front of Naruto, who now leaned back in his chair rubbing his stomach in satisfaction. However just as he was about to relax, he heard a sound that both surprised and scared him, which made him fall out of his chair and onto his face, "What… the …hell… was …that!" He jumped up and scanned his room, until his eyes fell unto more black words floating in the air.
Hunger replenished
"Replenished… huh, this must be a dream 'coz there aint no word like that!" Naruto laughed at his own joke before he swiped the words away, yet again and went into the bathroom.
He started to pull his shirt of, and as he neared the door, kicked it open and immediately threw his shirt in the laundry bin. He quickly pulled off his pants and underwear, and turned the tap for hot water in his shower. When he stuck a hand out to feel how out it was, his face turned into a frown and he shivered, "I just can't catch a break, can I!" He steeled himself and jumped in, vowing to make it as quick as possible.
Three minutes later he jumped out, shivering from the cold shower, and dried himself off at Genin speed. "On the bright side, now I'm fully awake, so no more floating words!" As soon as those words left his mouth, he heard the same sound from earlier, only surprising him this time. He looked in annoyance, at even more floating words.
Hygiene at acceptable level.
Naruto blanched at the thinly veiled insult and grew angry, "Hey, I just took a shower! I'm as clean as ever!" He calmed down after that outburst, and sighed in annoyance, and held his hands in the air while looking up. "Great, now I'm speaking to floating words, what next!" A scroll suddenly fell out of nowhere, and into his hand.
Naruto coward at the sudden appearance of the scroll and sat it down on the floor before bowing furiously, "I'm sorry Kami! Please don't let this be a death threat, PLEASE! I still need to be Hokage!"
Another scroll fell from the sky, on top of his head. Naruto winced at the impact, but was delighted to see another scroll. "Thank, you for changing your mind o great one!" He accompanied the compliment with another round of bows. When he finished bowing, curiosity took hold of him and he opened the second scroll, reading it out loud. "Read the first scroll you idiot, it's not a death threat!"
Naruto's eyebrow began to tick and he threw the scroll against the roof, and then watched in awe as it disappeared before it hit the roof. "Damn you… whoever is doing this." Even with his annoyance at an all time high, Naruto picked up the first scroll and started to read it too. "Congratulations, Naruto Uzumaki! You have been chosen to be my puppet, but also the main character, in a new game! Isn't that exciting?" Naruto grumbled something inaudible, but continued to read, "Now just because I said puppet, does that mean you have no choice in the matter? Well yes… and no. Yes in that you can chose which paths you take in the game, and NO in that you can't chose to quit the game."
Naruto's eyes narrowed and cursed whoever wrote the scroll, but then continued to read it. "Don't be annoyed though, because this game will make your life so much fun! Will it always be fun though? Well yes… and no. Yes in that I don't know which stuff you won't find fun, and No in that I'm pretty sure you'll get in trouble often." Naruto smirked, because he knew he could get out of anything. "Well, Naruto, now that you know this is a game… all you have to do is complete quests of your choosing. Then… wait for it… wait for it… YOU CAN GAIN EXPERIENCE AND LEVEL UP!" Naruto calmed down after reading that, not knowing why he read that part so loudly.
He sat against his bathroom wall and went back to reading, "Why did I sound so excited about that you ask? Because, Naruto, my dear idiot of a new friend, that means you become instantly stronger!" Naruto's eyes bugged out and he choked on air, "Hmm… you probably freaked out there, but it's true. Anyway, your quests will be on your new desk, their jobs you need to do and you can earn money from them." He sighed and stood up, but then noticed one more paragraph, "P.S a thank you for the new desk would be nice, since you probably didn't thank me. Also, if you need information, and I'm willing to answer just ask me. You can call me G.M"
He sighed and dried of his still wet hair, before getting dressed in his orange jumpsuit. When he walked out of the bathroom a new desk stood in his living room and he walked over to it. "Well, thanks I guess." He picked up a scroll and read it.
QUEST: Deliver the new icha-icha series to closet perverts, who do not wish to be seen buying the series.
Reward: Rent is automatically paid, and store owner now trusts you enough to offer you a part time job.
Naruto shrugged because that seemed like an easy task to do, so he pocketed the scroll and went to turn around, but then more black floating words appeared.
Do you accept quest? Say Yes, Say No
Naruto grumbled something inaudible, yet again, but decided to speak up. "Yes."
Quest accepted!
The scroll disappeared in his pocket, and he suddenly knew where the shop was that he was supposed to go to, he rubbed his head sheepishly and grinned. "Almost walked out without knowing where to go!" He laughed and headed out the door.
Oooooooooo~~~
Naruto stopped in front of a small shop, on a narrow road in the red light district. "Wow, this looks run down! Well if it gets the rent paid, who am I to complain?" He walked into the shop, and he had to stand still for a moment, so that his eyes could adjust to the low light. When recognized that a bell had gone off when he opened the door, and he could now see clearly, he looked around so he could find the owner.
A short fat man, with a balding head, and greased back hair looked up from the book he was reading, and frowned. "What do you want, kid?"
Naruto looked at the man, taking in his appearance. He had a pair of glasses on, a black button-up shirt, and gold almost everywhere on him. He had gold earrings, gold chains, gold rings and two gold watches. "Uhh…. I heard you needed a delivery boy."
The man took of his glasses and peered at Naruto, "And why would I hire you?"
Naruto was a little intimidated by the man, but he held his ground. "Because I can deliver goods, without any nosy people seeing, that's why!" He pumped a fist to his chest for emphasis.
"Fine, kid, but only because these books need to be delivered today…" He took four books out from under his counter, "… these are loyal customers, and they've paid top yen to get these books so early. So deliver them without any problems, and I'll pay you well kid." Naruto went to pick up the four books, but the man slammed his hand on top of his. "Mess up, and I'll have your head."
The threat made the Nine-Tails Jinchuriki gulp, and nod his head as fast as he could. He grabbed the goods, and sprinted out of the store. "Where am I even suppose to go?!" A white paper, attached to the top book, caught his attention and he read it. "O, well why didn't he just say I should read the white paper, if I want to know where I am going."
He suddenly noticed all the prostitutes looking at him funny, and decided to just jump onto the rooftops and make this quick.
Oooooooooo~~~
Naruto walked up to a moderately large house, with his package hidden away under his orange jacket. He walked slowly toward the door, all the while looking around to make sure no-one was looking at him, and knocked at the door.
A man wearing all black, with sunglasses and a black bandanna opened the door with a smile on his face, which quickly turned into a scowl when he saw Naruto. "What do you want brat!"
Naruto didn't let his attitude faze him, and just kept looking around before he went up close to him, and unzipped his jack. He then spoke in a voice, just above a whisper, "I have a special delivery for you, Mister Ebisu."
Ebisu's face flushed when he saw the icha-icha book and snatched it out of Naruto's jacket. He quickly put it away and expected Naruto to leave after that, but he just kept standing there, looking expectantly at Ebisu.
Naruto waited for the man to say thank you for the delivery, before he left, and they just stared at each other. Naruto blinked, and then went back to staring.
Ebisu, however, took their little staring contest as something else, 'This kid actually expects me to tip him, just so that he can stay quit about this, doesn't he?' Ebisu wanted to have a fit at that realization, but not wanting to cause a seen, he just dug out some money from his pockets.
Naruto watched in awe as Ebisu handed him 500yen, and then shut the door in his face, "Wow, thanks old man!"
Ebisu grumbled something about brat, before smiling when he looked at his new book, a perverted giggle escaping his mouth.
Naruto heard the giggle from outside, but just shrugged and turned around, looking at the piece of paper to see who is next. "Alright let's go!"
Oooooooooo~~~
Naruto was now standing in front of an apartment building, reading off of the piece of paper one last time. "Kurenai… Yuhi. Apartment 26, ok then." He ran up the stairs and skidded to a halt in front of apartment twenty-six, looked around to make sure no-one was looking, and then knocked three times. He waited for a minute until someone finally opened the door.
"Yes?"
"…"
"Answer me, boy."
Naruto couldn't answer, he wanted to, but he couldn't. Kurenai's ruby red eyes had completely entrapped Naruto, and her beautiful face didn't help his case either. "…"
"This is the last time I'll ask you to speak."
That snapped Naruto out of his daze, and he quickly scanned the beautiful women up and down. "Uhh… Kurenai Yuhi?"
Kurenai frowned at the disrespect of no suffix, but nodded nonetheless.
"Uhh… Kurenai ma'am, uhh sir… I mean miss…" Naruto stumbled over his words a few more times, until he just held out the icha-icha book with his head down and a blush on his face.
Kurenai stared at the weird kid in front of her for a moment, until she noticed the book and then gained a small blush of her own. She quickly regained her composure; however, "That is not mine."
Naruto's eyes bugged out and he fumbled around with the book, until he could grab hold of the white piece of paper, "I'm so sorry Kurenai-san, please forgive me!" But then he read the paper again, "This is apartment 26, right?"
Kurenai nodded in agreement, and then gained an annoyed look, "Just wait one moment, kid."
Naruto watched as the women disappeared behind the door, and then heard a scuffle ensue. He was worried for a moment until she came back, dragging a purple haired woman by the ear. "Kurenai-chaaaaan, I was still sleeping!"
Kurenai's face showed no sign of sympathy and she simply pointed at the book, "Is this yours?"
The purple haired woman looked at Naruto through blurry eyes, and then smirked, "No, but I'll play with him you don't want to!"
Naruto's blush deepened at that comment, especially with her only in an almost see through T-shirt that clung tight to her body, and Naruto could clearly see the woman's nipples through it. Kurenai just sighed Anko's behavior. "I meant the book, Anko, leave the poor kid alone."
Anko frowned a little at that but looked at the book and then smiled brightly, "O yes, it's mine!" She grabbed the book and ran off, to her room to read it.
Kurenai sighed again and then looked back at Naruto, she nodded at him once, "Thank you for your patience, and goodbye."
Naruto nodded dumbly, still seeing Anko's body in his imagination and smiled a goofy smile at Kurenai with a red face. She gave him an amused smile before closing the door.
Naruto turned around and walked back down the flight of stairs, "Wow… THEY ARE HOT AS HELL!" As soon as that left his mouth, he slapped a hand across his mouth and looked back at Kurenai's door with panicked eyes. Expecting her to have heard him, and to come out and yell at him for that comment. Seeing nothing happen, Naruto made like a ninja, and ran away.
Inside the apartment, Anko and Kurenai had heard Naruto's loud statement, and Anko was holding Kurenai back with a smirk on her face while she tried to get to the door. "O come on, Kurenai-chan, give the kid a break!"
Kurenai struggled even more in Anko's grip, "Let me go Anko! That kid needs to be learned respect!"
Anko laughed. "But we are hot as hell!"
Kurenai just glared at Anko, and stopped struggling in her grip, "Fine, I'll let it go this once."
Oooooooooo~~~
Naruto smiled as he saw the next name on his list, and then chuckled as the mans' house came into view. He gained a devious smile as he knocked on the door.
Moments later a middle-aged man with a scar across his nose-bone opened the door, and smiled when he saw who it was, "Well, hello Naruto."
Naruto wagged a finger in front of him, "I'm here on urgent business, Iruka-sensei." His face was as serious as he could manage.
Iruka lost his smile and became serious as well, "What, is it Naruto?"
"I'm here on a top secret delivery mission." He moved closer to Iruka and when the man leaned in, pulled out the icha-icha book.
Iruka looked at the book for a second, and then face-faulted, he quickly stood up and pointed a finger at Naruto, "What the HELL Naruto! You scared me to death with your serious talk!"
Naruto tried to hold back his laugh at the older mans' reaction but couldn't, and he burst out laughing, "I'm sorry Iruka-sensei, but I just couldn't help it."
Iruka grumbled and then pointed at the book, "What are you doing with that?"
"This?" Naruto held the book up to his eye level, "I'm here to deliver it for you," He finished with an innocent smile.
Iruka blushed in embarrassment and then snatched the book from Naruto, "Not a word of this to anyone."
"And what's gonna stop me?" Naruto looked at Iruka confidently, until his sensei smiled back at him.
"A weeks worth of detention and clean up duty enough for you."
Naruto shook his head and held up his hands in a defensive gesture, "I was just kidding, sensei!" He turned around and bolted in the direction of his next delivery.
Oooooooooo~~~
Naruto looked at the last name on his list and smirked, he would milk this person for a huge tip. His smirk widened as he burst into the Hokage's office with a boisterous attitude and a laugh, "Old man!"
Hiruzen sighed, and put his paper work down, "How many times must I tell you to knock, before you come in!"
"Yes, and now I know why I should knock, old man!" He took the last copy of icha-icha out of his jacket, and threw it onto the table.
Hiruzen looked at the book with a passive face, and then back to Naruto, "…"
Naruto's smirk widened even more.
The Hokage gave him a sweet smile, "Why do you have this, Naruto?"
Naruto laughed, "I'm your delivery guy, old man!"
"I see."
Naruto smirked again and walked closer to Hiruzen's desk, "That means you should give me a tip, for my great work, Old man."
"Really now?"
"Really…" Naruto nodded his head to the door, "The lady out there likes to talk to me, and I don't know what mite slip."
Hiruzen sighed and leaned back into his chair, "Blackmailing the Hokage of your own village." He motioned with his hand and four ninja appeared around Naruto, all four with weapons pointing at vital spots, making Naruto almost piss his pants.
"Old man, who are these people…" His voice radiated with fear, and Hiruzen smiled at that.
"They are my insurance, Naruto. If you speak of this to anyone, they will find you." He took a drag from his pipe, before exhaling and giving Naruto a little glare.
The blonde haired Uzumaki nodded as fast as he could, and the four ninja vanished as fast as they came.
"Fine old man, you win." Naruto sighed and made his way back to his apartment.
Oooooooooo~~~
As soon as Naruto stepped into the house, black floating words appeared in front of him.
QUEST COMPLETE: Building manager was happy that you finally paid your rent on time- expect hot water in the shower for a change. 10% Experience gained.
Naruto sighed in exhaustion and fell on his couch, "I can't believe this is happening to me…"
AN: This was just the first quest, to introduce you to my version of this game!Naruto, so you could say it was a prologue of sorts. The following chapters will have much more happening in them… trust me on that!
This story will be low on my update list though, because I really want to get back to two of my other fics, but if by some miracle I get a lot of alerts, favs and many reviews it will definitely go to my number one one the update list.
Slade963
Out
