I blame this on an experience I had earlier today when going out for a drink at the local 24/7 .. Now I reacted coolly, but I doubt Johnny would have. So, to relieve angsty stress that the incident caused me, I am writing this. Oh, and If you haven't noticed, I'm a really poor person, and own nothing. that means Johnny and anything else I might throw in there.

It's a decent hour, lets say 9pm, and our favorite Homicidal Maniac is making his way to the 24/7 for a Brain Freezy and some Pop Rocks. And of course there's nothing wrong with that, just usual commuting and stuff. Nny enters the store wearing his usual attire, complete with a shirt that says 'don't touch me'. So far so good. Gets the Pop Rocks. Yup, nothing out of the ordinary. Now for that Cherry Doom Brain Freezy. Nny walks up to the machine and looks at the flavors. Frosty Peanut. Icy Ham. and Horrific Bananas?!?! No Cherry Doom.. Nny looks to the store clerk. There sits a very obese woman on a stool that looks like there is no possible way it could be supporting her massive weight.

"What happened to the Cherry flavor?" Nny asks frantically.

The woman, *whom we'll call Bertha kuz I think that name is fitting and because that's what her little name tag says. and why she is wearing a name tag working in a 24/7 I have no idea, but she is. maybe it is one of those stickers they give you in group therapy and she just got out or something and didn't take it off. maybe she just wants everyone to know who she is because she's strange like that, but either way.. there sits Bertha the largely* ,shifts in her seat and glares at Nny. *She glared. that sounds like a really dumb thing to do right?*

"Oh, we ain't getting that one no more. it tasted like shit anyway." says Bertha. and might I note that she said this in a tone not unlike the one you use when you are telling your dog to shut the fuck up.

Of course at this point Nny is boiling mad and here's how he reacts to rude Bertha.

"That was the Best flavor that Ever Existed you Obese Fuck!!!" Nny has gone from standing on the floor to bending over the counter and about an inch from big Bertha's face.

"Heh. go cry about it kid." Bertha snaps. *You and I both know this was a really dumb thing to do. Bertha really wants to die doesn't she.*

"You FUCKING BITCH!!" Nny yells as he grabs for a Freezy straw.

Nny then attacks Bertha with the Freezy straw. *Hey kids! Use your imagination on this one! I have no idea how he caused that much damage with a straw, but if anyone could do it.. it would have to be Nny.* Anyway, Nny goes at it with the straw and kills Bertha who screams and tries to get away, but, when Nny jumps her, the stool finally gives way and shatters into pieces on the floor. If you listened very closely, you could almost hear the words 'freedom' being uttered from the splintered remains of the stool, that is if you could hear anything over the loud screaming that Bertha was doing. Damn that bitch musta had some lungs. but not anymore, as Nny somehow made his way into her chest cavity with his straw and slung her remains all over the front of the store.

During this incident, an old woman had come to get some milk, as you know they like to go to the little stores as it is so much safer than having to worry about those dark parking lots at K-mart. *Might I also note that at this hour NO senior citizens should be out whatsoever, but of course no one listens to me and since old ladies are just senile, she was there.* Anyways, she had her carton of milk and was walking to the register. Being half blind and not all here, she didn't notice the scattered organs, or the blood curt ling scream, and walked right up to the counter as Nny was finishing his 'work'. *Might I also note that now his shirt says 'one happy camper'.* He pops up from behind the counter and startles the shit outta that old woman and she drops her milk. Nny jumps the counter and picks it up for her, leaving a nice bloody handprint, but the old woman doesn't seem to notice.

Here's what says the old woman. "Oh thank you. what a nice young man."

And with that, Nny exits the 24/7 in search of one that #1. Has Cherry Doom Brain Freezies #2. NEVER turns its machines off and #3 Has a less irritable worker.

Wooh! I had fun writing that and I feel better now. So what says ye? Was that worth the wasted time it took you to read? Well. if you wasted that much time reading the damn thing then why worry about the time you'll waste reviewing it? Don't make me use the almighty word prod. kuz I will.. So. jut push that button down there... you know. that one right there. yeah, you see it. don't pretend that you don't. we all know you see it. and yes I said we. well anyway.. Back on topic. that button wants you to push it. yeah it really does. and we all know you want to. there I go with the we again. JUST PUSH THE DAMN BUTTON!! I NEED CRITICISM DAMNIT!! COME ON!! PUSH MY BUTTON!!!! . Oh well. I guess you should just do whatever you want really.. Heh. that was a little excessive wasn't it. *stops now while she still can* 8}