I kind of have this 'weird' feelings. It's been like this since last week. My chest suddenly felt heavy and tighten, I breath is harsh and faster than the usual. What's going on with me?
Feeling that my body somehow become numb, shiver, froze at my place, it's like that something or someone stare at me intently. What should I do to get rid of this? I don't want to keep feel like this.
"Yo!", said Dell as he put his arm on my shoulder. "what's wrong? You spacing out this recently, you know".
"ahaha.. I know. Well, I just got something on my mind", I said. Well, thanks to his presence that I'm able to awake from my own thought.
I could see a grin appear at his face, "could it be that 'something' in your mind is about that cute girl which just transfered here?", he said in whispered. He sure does know every new news in this school, huh? Well.. he is part of the News Paper Club afterall, so it's not really surprising.
I shook my head, "I don't know there's a new girl at this school". He sighed heavily. "well then you shall come with me, partner!", he said and pulled me along.
"why should I come with you!?", I quickly asked him, and he just said, "with your popularity it is easy to approach her and ask her, right? We shall use your somewhat kind of your charm to our own advantage!, don't you agree, Len?".
'Our Advantage' he said!? That's bullshit! He's just using me, damn it! Tch..
"well! We're here!", he said as he opened the door of the class. We then walk inside and directly to the new girl which sit on her table and talk with her friends. When I saw her, I chest suddenly tighten again.
"yo, new girl! Nice to meet you. We are from the News Paper Club. Can we interview and ask you with some question?", asked Dell to her. She nodded as the answer.
"ah, by the way, I'm Dell. Dell Honne. Nice to meet you.", he introduced himself and shake her hand. "I'm Miku. Miku Hatsune. Nice meeting you too.", the girl answered in smile.
Dell hit my shoulder as the signal that I should introduce myself too. I reach out my hand to her, "Len Kagamine. Nice too meet you.". "Nice to meet you too", she then hold and shake my hand. I quickly react to pull my hand off from hers. And the next time I notice myself already running from there.
I don't know why but when she hold my hand I can feel that her hand is cold and I feel somehow scary. Make me more and more scared than I could imagine. But why? This girl doesnt do anything to me and I just know her now. This kind of feelings is just like the feeling that make me shivered even sudden froze. Is she someone I know but I just don't remember? Or there might someone else that don't like me and immerse that kind of aura so I would aware and scared?
I quickly shook my head and take a deep breath to calm my panicking innerself. In any way, I think I should make a less contact with her in everything and every possible way. I might shouldn't make any contact with her anymore to prevent bad things. That's for the best..
Finally the school time is over as the sun start to setting at two o'clock from the window at the left of my classroom.
Dell come to my table. "oi, are you okay? You look pale when you run out from her class, you know.", he said as he look at me while I'm watching the sun. "let's talk on our way back", I whispered to him. I quickly stand up from my chair and walk out.
As we walking out from class then down to the street there's silence between us for awhile. I could see from the edge of my eye that he really try to holding up to not asking until we really at the street where it's less people there.
"Now you better tell me about what you wanna talk about, Len. I knew you know that I've been holding up to not asking until now, right?", he said as he blows up what he want to say. Well, Dell is a kind of 'Monster of Curiosity' like person.
I sighed and head to the river bank which we usually head before going home. "Dell, you shake hands with her too, right?", I started to asked. He nodded, "what's wrong with that?".
I walk closer to the river. "Then how did her hand feels like?", I asked him again as I put my hand into the water. He think for awhile. "I think her hand is normal, but somehow a bit cold I guess.", he answered.
"That's right", I said. "it's autumn afterall so it's just normal if her hand is cold, right?", he asked again. "Her hand is cold, but even colder than this water does." I continued as he touch the water. "the cold you felt from her hand might considered as normal because of the weather and the different temperatur from yours and her body. But for me that was really not normal."
Dell grinned at his curious face. "That really sounds interesting. That's what I expect of my closest pal!", he said in excitement. "Your body really become sensitive to things after that incident, huh", he said. "And you yourself become a monster Curiousity after that incident too", he just giggled after heard what I said.
But.. that incident. It's true that both of us got some kind of ability we never expected to have after that incident, weird isn't it? My body or I should say all my sense become a lot more sensitive, and Dell become someone that if he already curious, he won't stop for not seek through it, and people that usually make him curious always had something behind their masks. Well, that cause a lot of problem to me, though at the end he could end it all.
From what I remember was that we lost when explore a cave while waiting the storm of snow to calm down. If I'm not mistaken that while we were walking inside there we heard something that make us walk to seek the source of voice. But after that, all we can remember was that both of us was already running out from that cave and collapse in front of our worried parents. And after awhile we realize that somehow change into someone that has a weird ability. Both of us had promised to keep these as a secret just between us.
We end our talk as we walk to a differet path at this intersection. Both of our house are close to each other, even our family already really close to each other. It's not sounds weird if we already close since we're kids, right?
After walk awhile, quickly dashed to my house and get inside. I don't know but I felt being follow by someone and sees me intently made me have a bad feeling. I decide to forget that and rest.
I stretch my body as soon as I heard the bell for recess time had been ringing. I feel so sleepy that I already yawned for countless time today. Maybe it's because I can't sleep last night?
I notice that there's a noise from the door, but I ignore it. It might just those guys who being noisy about math lesson that they hate so much. But then my simple-minded thought brings me to unfortunate fate and I totally late for run away.
"ehm.. Are you okay yesterday? You look quite pale yesterday.". When I heard the voice of the girl my body quickly freeze at my chair and shivered. What should I do now?i should have realize that noise was because they try to get her from them and now I can't run away in this situation. I should think of something or things gonna be worse.
"Are you sick? Your body is shivering, Len.", she said as she try to touch my forehead.
"Don't touch me!", I shouted and slap her hand away. Our eyes accidentally meet. I can't control my body, it's all panicking and I somehow can't calm down myself. She even comes closer to me. i can't get my mind to find a way from this. What now? Will I die right at this moment?
Someone pull her away from me. "Yo, Miku. Nice to meet ya! I don't know that you'll come to our class today. If you have something to say then it's better for us to come there rather let the lady walk here, right?", said Dell to her which suddenly appeard out of nowhere.
She become silent. He said again, "well, I'll tell ya. Len is rarely in touch with girls except his own family. So, I suggest that you don't need to think anything about this kind of reaction, 'kay?"
"I just wondering why he ran like that yesterday", she said in low tone. "w-well, if that's the case then I won't think about that anymore. Then, see you next time!", she said then dashed out from my class.
After I don't hear her pace anymore, I can calm myself a bit. "that's the worse case you even can't predict that, can you?", Dell said and sit in front of me.
I sighed. "But gladly you came right on time before I might done something that make me get punishment from teachers.", I said to him. "you almost punch her, right? well, to be glad that your monster of curiousity friend was realize that before you did something that will drag you to the judgement, no?", he said again.
Gladly I safe this time. Thanks to the fake information that he told her about me and girls. I really shouldnt get along with her anymore. I should try not to approach her in any case. "I think she's dangerous, Dell. We should stay away from her.", I said to him and he nodded as the answer. I know he understands me and I could trust him in many things. We're close friends afterall.
From days to days, we keep stay away from her. I was the one who suggest that at beginning, I should have done that more to keep away. But why, why I become more attach to her than before? We somehow accidently look to each other eyes and that time I can't escape from her beautiful but cold eyes. I supposed to be afraid to her, and it still does until now, but.. I just can't. I can't escape from that prisoning eyes yet cold and shivered me more. What is this kind of feeling? It's twisting inside me like myself being mixed into something that unpredictable.
Wherever I go, wherever I walk to somewhere I always see her and then she look back at me. But whatever it is I always run away quickly. Why I always meet her? Why she always at the place where I was at? I don't want to meet her, I really really don't want to! Her presences scare me, her eyes are stabbing me like a sharp ice, but yet everyone said that she's a warm person with calming eyes.
Am I the only one that thinking like this? Am I the only one that thinking that she's a scary person that you shoudn't stay with or even should run away from?
Wait.. I'm not insane, right? I am normal, right? I even still could think straight, so I think I'm not insane yet. But if I told everybody about this they will call me crazy, so I would rather keep this on my own.
I really should get myself strong, if not I really could get crazy. The most worse scenario that I really never expect is that we on art class at the same time for the last lesson today because the teachers are chaging the daily schedule to a new one. What should I do now? Even Dell is at a different class with me and her. She from class A, Dell is class B, and I'm class C.
I come in to the art room right after she and her friends already take a seat, then I quickly take the most far seat from her so I won't be able to feel her strong presence.
I will be fine. I should keep my cool and stay to be like usual.
After the time has come to an end, everyone go back home while I'm still tidying my stuff at the art room since I was the last to finish my painting. But gladly that even her already gone from here, so I could finish my painting a lot faster. I'm sure I'm going to remake this since it was a ruined one! I really can't concentrate back then!
In the middle of tidying my stuff, I heard someone slide the door open then close it back. I think I heard a 'click' voice after it, but I think I'm just being paranoid because of earlier 'unwanted scenario'.
I turn to look at the door, and then... I freeze for what I see at this moment.
"Are you okay? Your face look pale.", said the girl at in front of the door. My brain and my body really freeze, can't think nor move even an inch at the moment. Why is she here? This is worse, this is worse...
"Hey, why are you always avoiding me? why?", she asked me as she walk closer to me and keep asking me 'why?'. I quickly force my body move back as she keep walk closer and closer.
My body hit a table which should be near the wall and quickly look at my back. I realize that I'm already at the furthest way to go backward and sitting on the table. But, I was too late to realize it and she already standing close in front of me. She put her knee on the table and between my legs to prevent to move away.
"Len, please answer me. why are you always avoiding me?", she asked me again in soft and sweet whispers. My eyes meet hers, and quickly my mind turn blank. Her 'cold' hands is holding my cheeks and draw my face slowly close to her, preventing my eyes to look away from hers. I could feel her chilli breath touching my skin. Her eyes keep asking me the answer and not allowing me to blink even once.
I could feel her breath more closer, really close to my face. And slowly I could feel a cold sweet sensation start to touch my lips. I suddenly have my sense back and quickly push her away from me and dashing to the door which was actually being locked by her.
"Don't go, Len!", she shouted softly and start to stand. I panickly take my bag then quickly unlock the door and dashing out from the room. I run as fast as possible to home, not wanting her to be able to catch up with me.
Start from the last week, I prefer to not be alone at anywhere or anytime. I was starting to stay away from girls and even rarely to talk to any of them. I even can't calm myself down and always feel aware to around me. I could hear everyone said that I'm start to become weird and look so stress.
I should prevent something like that day to happen again. But when I rethink that I can't sense that she's coming and locked the door, was she trying to prevent anyone to get inside that time? But why? And what does she want from me? I really don't get it.
"...that girl is here", I shocked, quickly out of my own thought and look around. "I'm just lying, take it easy, Len."
"Dell?! Damn! You really shock me, you know!?", I shouted. He just giggled to see my reaction.
"Well, just calm down. I'm here to protect you, young master", he said and bowed like a butler which I ever saw in movie. "...disgusting.", I mumbled. "Oi, I could hear that very clear, you know!".
He sit next to me, "she seems not making a move since last week, huh". I nodded in between glad and worried as well. Worried that she might start to come to me again.
She just a normal girl, right? but why I keep feeling scare though she never done something out of logic. The thing happen in the art room was something normal for someone to just did that, wasn't it? Is she really is weird or I'm the one who is weird actually?
It's been two weeks since that thing which happen in the art room. Today, in the middle of the class I start feeling not really well and decide to rest at the nursery room. Maybe this happen because of the stress I have since that day and I don't have enough rest. Although I already laying on the bed at the nursery, I still can't get some rest.
After awhile of trying, someone is coming in. It seems that it's the doctor who work here so I think I shouldn't be worried.
The doctor come to me and ask if I was not able to sleep, and I nodded. The doctor leave for a while and give me a cup of tea which to make me calm down. After that I lay back again and try to sleep.
When I later open my eyes, I realize that the time already showing 3.45 p.m. I quickly wake up heading to Dell's club room. When I get there, they said that he told them that he had something to do then running away. That means he already go home ahead without me, right? Did he forget about me at the nursery? I already text him about that though.
I then quickly walk home before the sky really turn dark outside. My condition is like this and he left me?! what unreliable friend he is. I'll call him and yell at him later when I'm arrive at home!
I then arrive at the intersection which we usually seperated ways to our own home. The sunset still quit give its shine the surrounding, and then what I really don't want is happening.
The shine of the light show me a girl which is standing across the road, looks waiting there alone, waiting for someone. When the crossing light turns green she start to walk and reach out her hand to my direction. "Len.. my little Len.."
It's her! The person that I even never want to mention her name! The person that make me stress like this! Why is she here!? I quickly turn back and run away, pulling my heavy body. Why from all condition that she should come to me while I'm feeling sick?!
I keep running to just stay away from me without any direction. After awhile of running I realize that I'm somehow lost.
"Len... where are you going..?"
Without knowing where to go, I just go to where that seems I could hide there. And I end up running where the place to be empty.
"Len... come here..."
I keep running and search for place to hide. My head is killing me! My vision is turn blurry slowly, it's been like this from before I ahead home and now it's getting worse.
"...come here...come here.."
Knowing that myself will be no longer be able to run, I look for place to hide faster. I arrive at a place where all are irons that standing as the pillar around the place. I decide to take a rest for awhile becase I don't feel to keep running like this. When I walk, I see a pool of blood and some blood at the pillars around. The blood is still new somehow, from the fact it's not dry yet. When I look around, I found a small magnifying glass which it seems to be a strap for cellphone.
Wait.. wasn't this..
"...Let's play! ..Shall we, Len?"
I quickly shout out, calling for Dell's name since this cellphone strap is a treasure for him. This strap as a symbol that shows he detailed everything he search and which I gave to him for present.
"...found you..Len"
She already find me? Notice that I quickly turn back to face her, but my reaction was too late. She hold my right arm and move to my back. She slide my feet and make me bent down. She pushed my back with her feet to keep me down while keep hold up my right arm. I try to break free my arm from her but I can't, my body is in a very week state.
"Hey, play with me, okay Len?", she giggled. She pull my right arm even harder and spin it. I could heard cracking voice from my right arm as I screamed painfully.
She let my right arm go as I keep grunting while holding my right arm. "Beautiful.. your expression is even more beautiful than his", she said and keep stare at me. She licking the blood at her hand, "what a delicious blood you have... let me drink it more, Len.."
I quickly get up and run away from her. I keep running around the pillars, hoping that she won't be able to catch up. I suddenly notice that a knife is flying to my direction, I react to dodge it as soon as possible by move back a bit. Then there's something fly towards from the front and hit my body really hard. Directly, a knife stab my left wrist to the pillar behind me.I start panicking and try to reach the knife, but my fingers are not long enough to reach it.
"What are you trying to do?", she asked as she move around the knife at my wrist. I hold not to grunt for the more pain she cause by doing that. "You won't be able to run away now", she smirked and suddenly pushed the knife to go deeper. I screamed out, can't endure the pain much longer.
"My.. it's quite an effort to catch you though I already break your right arm.", she grinned, " Maybe I should have break you more earlier".
She pull up my hair to see my face, "what an explendid painful expression you show to me". She grinned even more, "I love it so much, this kind expression of yours which I saw years ago, is still the same as it is.", she said devilishly and start to hit my head to the pillar until it start to bleed a lot.
What does she mean by 'years ago'? Did I ever meet her somehow? More importantly, what about Dell?
"What have you done to Dell?", I asked her with all my last energy. "Dell? Ah.. you mean that annoying kid? I already get rid of him of course! He's standing on my way to get you afterall", she said innocently.
"So there's no worry about him anymore, right?", she said softly. "From now on, your heart and your soul will be mine", she whispered devilly as I close my eyes slowly. There's no need to stop her anymore, right? Dell died because of me, so this might a punishment because I drag him into this.
At the last time I could feel her cold sweet and so soft lips slowly touch mine. I grunt when she somehow pierce my chest deeply and open it with her one free hand. Suddenly I start coughing blood and grunt painfully, but she keep her lips on mine and drink the blood from my mouth. Some tears flow down my cheeks. My breath become more slow as her lips keep sipping my blood from my mouth, sink me into a deep deep sleep as I say good bye to myself.
..Forgive me...Dell..
