Battle for the Throne Room

Summary. De-anon from the LJ Kink Meme. Prompt asked for fem!Xanxus/Xanxus or Xanxus/fem!Xanxus.
Rating. M
Disclaimer. KHR! is not mine.
Warnings. Genderbender with fem!Xanxus, het sex between the Xanxi (Xanxus's?)
A/N. old fill i did for the kink meme, it's been rotting in my hard driver and i finally decided to put it up here. still in the editing process, i'll come back to it later. hopefully.


Xanxus was pissed. No, he was beyond pissed. As if his day hadn't been bad enough with Levi's attempt at food and Lussuria redecorating the Varia castle (again. He really needed to get it through the scum's head that the Varia did. Not. Like. Pink.), he was now facing this. This…thing that was sprawled on his throne like she owned the place, with Bester relaxing at her feet.

He supposed she did own the place, in whatever messed up world she came from, but that was his throne, thank you very much, and he did not appreciate others on it. Not even alternate versions of him, which was actually the sole reason why he had yet to unleash his flames on her.

As for the woman, she was petting Bester's head, ignoring the other occupant in the room. The rest of the Varia had scurried away after the pink smoke had revealed a female version of their Boss, because, in the words of Belphegor, "Ushishi, boss with PMS? The Prince will have to pass". Only Xanxus remained to deal with her, and he mentally reminded himself to kick the other's asses later for not being men enough to face her.

He, on the other hand, was the epitome of manliness, and he thus decided to show it.

"Get off," he grunted.

For the first time since her appearance, a pair of red eyes which matched his fell on him. He suppressed a shudder, which he felt because of her overpowering aura and was in no way related to her sexual appeal (or the fact that she was lacking clothing…really, what had she been doing to end up in only her boots, a miniskirt and bra?).

Instead of replying, she hummed. Then she went back to staring at the wall. Xanxus twitched. The spell having been broken, he strode forward with his long legs, and grabbed her arm.

"I said, 'get off'" he growled.

Matching eyes met his, hateful glare full on, as the slightly slimmer arm freed itself from his grip. Xanxus then found himself meeting the floor, a booted foot kicking him a full metre away with the least amount of strength.

As if sensing impending danger, Bester stood up and left the duo, quickly slinking into the room's darkness.

The leader of the Varia attempted to stand up, only to be pushed down again by a dark heel. He groaned in discomfort, glaring once more. However, he soon turned away when he discovered she was not wearing any panties. She chuckled at this, bending forward, allowing him a good view of her cleavage. The room grew hotter.

"Say, how old are you?" were the first words to leave her mouth.

Her voice was deep, not something one would associated with a woman but fitting nonetheless. Xanxus was forced to stare in order to answer.

"Twen-Twenty-five," and he did not just stutter!

"Hmm, only a year since the Ring Battle? Perhaps that explains your naïveté…" she mumbled, more to herself than to him.

His embarrassment forgotten, Xanxus was once again angered. He had had various partners, and he was not in the least naïve about the pleasures of life. At the change in his mood, she chuckled lightly. Then, she did the unexpected. Xanxus was, as the brat's Sun Guardian would say, extremely surprised when he found himself facing her core, as she sat on his chest with her legs spread behind his head. Slowly, she scurried closer to him, until he was mere breath away.

"Lick," she said. No, ordered.

And he did. His tongue reached out and rested against her, before he began to stroke her folds and plunge into her heat. Her trimmed fingernails were raking through his hair, as she pulled him closer while her legs locked behind his head.

She was panting harshly, and Xanxus tasted the wetness, licking it all dutifully. She was close, he could tell. Deciding to be brash, and prove himself to her, he moved his hands slowly, stroking the strong thighs that had him locked in place, before pressing his fingers against her. Slowly, he began to massage her clit as he continued licking.

When the first finger entered her, she let out the loudest noise yet, and he smirked. He still had some control over the situation. Xanxus continued his assault with renewed vigour, adding more fingers, as her head rolled back on her shoulders. Before she came undone, however, his hands were stopped and pinned.

Red met red - one quizzical the other mischievous.

"We're not done yet," she said.

With a speed that spoke of years of practice (really, what was she up to in her world?), Xanxus found his pants gone, his need free to the world. He groaned lightly as his cock met the cold air of the room, but it was quickly replaced by a new heat. His eyes widened as she went down on him, taking him in so quickly, in one thrust. Both stood still for a moment, as if their actions and their implication were just beginning to dawn on them.

"We're probably breaking about ten moral laws here," he muttered with a grunt.

"Shut up and fuck me," was her breathless reply.

And then she went up, before sinking back down on him. Pleasure stirred in both their bodies, as they continued to rock, although somewhere in Xanxus' mind he was being reprimanded for being dominated like this, by a woman to boot. Never mind that they were, essentially, the same person.

In an attempt to find something to hold on to, lest he be outdone and lost in the heat of the moment, Xanxus moved his hands about, before she guided him to her breasts. He grabbed them tightly, almost painfully so, but he figured she liked it by the "yes, yes, yes" that accompanied his actions.

As the pleasure heightened, his shaking fingers managed to slip under the bra, briefly skirting over her nipples. She groaned loudly at that, before suddenly stilling then shuddering, as she came down his cock.

When the movement stopped and the heat left, Xanxus growled, but he soon bit back his words as calloused hands wound around him, working him to completion.

As the air stilled and Bester stirred somewhere in the room, she let herself fall on him, staying there. He nudged her, but she refused to move. He glared.

"Get off,"

"Shit, are you always so goddamned annoying?"

He glared again. Then stared up at the ceiling.

"This castle needs to fixing, just so you know, it's falling to pieces - leader of the Varia, my ass," she snorted. He was about to reply, but she poofed off in pink smoke, leaving him alone.

With a grunt, he turned over, not caring enough to clean himself up. As Bester moved to lay behind him, he figured he hated her.

He also needed to get a hold of the shark later, so he could arrange for fixing the castle.


A/N. i always pick selfcest prompts OTL anyway. comments on the sex scene and fem!Xanxus', hell both Xanxi's (Xanxus's? WHAT IS THE PLURAL FOR THIS?) characterizations are appreciated.