I remember when I was a child... So free of the truth, content with the lies. Yet I was always curious, leading me to ask questions like, 'Mother, father, why is my skin so cold?' or, 'Mother, father, why don't I look like you, or Thor?' they were all answered the same, with mother's kind hand on my cheek, looking at me like I was the only thing that mattered. "Well Loki dear, you're a little different... No, special." Oh how she made those words warm my heart and ease my mind. Little did I know just how 'special' I really was.
Now that I think of it, mother was the only one who really showed any compassion for me. Her and Thor, of course. Father never really seemed to care... He was always busy helping Thor, teaching Thor, loving Thor. Meanwhile I was left to myself, constantly wondering how to make him say those words. Good job, son. I'm so proud of you! Soon I just wanted him to know he had another son, that Thor wasn't the only one who needed some recognition. That's when I started playing tricks, 'raising hell' as some would say. Sure enough he was there, acknowledging my existence.
My misguided need for attention only grew worse with age, soon my punishment became my daily routine. The books father would make me read became my bedtime stories, the endless hours of training became stress-relievers. Of course... Using magic as a stress release isn't well... The smartest thing, especially for someone of my age. It always ended with me getting hurt, and when mother tried to take me to the healing rooms Thor would insist he take care of me, almost afraid to let someone else lay their hands on me.
"Oh brother, you must stop with this... I worry for your safety..."
I scoffed a bit. "Please Thor, I'm fine. Plus do you really even know what you're doing?"
He stopped then, seeming to think of some clever lie, but when that didn't work, "Uh... No, not really. But I'm your brother, and mother always tells us how brothers are made to help each other..."
I couldn't help but smile softly, ruffing up his boyish blonde hair. "Yes, that may be, but I think I might need some realmedical attention."
A pout, as usual. "Fine...But I'm taking you to the healing rooms..."
"Of course..."
Oh how we were back then... So close, the best of friends really, two brothers as they should be. But... That was how things used to be, before things, well... Changed. Now you may think it all went bad the day father told me what I was... Or maybe when Thor was sent to Earth, that's where you're wrong. It started a few years before that... When suddenly his friends became more important than our time together. Naturally I couldn't help but to feel jealous.
"Jealousy? Is that why you tried to tear apart Manhattan?" The man croaked, sweaty palms gripping at the fabric of his pants.
Loki glanced back at him, watching how the man shifted under his hard gaze. He'd been so busy telling his story that he'd all but forgotten the squeamish mortal. "Is this how your people normally act when in the presence of a god?" He flashed a toothy grin.
The man was quick to try and correct his mistake. "N-no no! Don't get the wrong idea, I was just.. Uh..." His voice trailed off, eyes seeming to search for the right term to use. "Making an observation!" Too enthusiastic. "... I didn't mean to uh... Offend you in any way..."
He almost had to hold back a laugh, taking pride in the fear he undoubtedly caused. "Hush, Steve. Let me continue my story..."
"Yes sir..."
Day after day I'd sit and watch while Thor and his friends went on countless adventures, watch while he was constantly praised for his heroic actions. It made me sick inside, and I wasn't quite sure why. Was it because he ignored me? Was it because he was the one whom our parents held highest? Thinking about it only made my head hurt, so I chose to ignore it instead, focus on my magic.
"Come now brother! Join us in celebration of our most recent victory!" He bellowed, obviously knowing there was no use of whispering in an empty library.
Why did he even try? I'd only be forced to sit and sip my wine while everyone went on and on about his 'accomplishments'. "No, Thor... I will not attend another celebration in honor of your... How did you put it? Victory?" I couldn't help but snort slightly, knowing he was most likely the cause for whatever trouble they had to face.
Without even looking from my book I could feel the slight drop in his expression, the slump in his shoulders. Still he seemed to manage a laugh, more of a weak attempt really. "Brother... There is no need for such hurtful words... After all, I hear things like this only come once a year.." There was something off about him, he seemed... Desperate.
Pushing this aside I shut the book I'd been reading and rose to my feet, meeting brother's weary gaze with a stern look. "Please... More like once a week." This time it just wasn't worth laughing at, or even a smile.
I didn't let him respond though, it simply wasn't worth my time. Still... Walking away from him like that took a certain amount of courage, I loved him dearly I just couldn't stand watching him get all the credit once more. A bath... I needed to bathe, cleanse myself of my thoughts and go to bed early.
"And on my birthday of all days... Tsk!"
