Breaking the Bonds
A/N: Alright, I have to explain this one... *sighs* Ok, this by far is a death fic. It is not for Gaara; however, in this fanfiction, I wanted to experiment with Gaara's bonds... and what would happen/his reaction if he were to lose them... Yes, this is a death-fic and a morbid one at that. Each chapter, I have a different bond breaking and Gaara reflections off of it. This meaning, a different person will die each chapter... I told you, it's depressing. I'm depressed with it. But my fascinated brain could not let this one go! So please try to enjoy despite it might leave you a little upset with me by the end!
Also, I will give credit to 'Epicfailpig' who graciously took time out of her busy schedule to edit this monsterous first chapter. If you ever have the time, I suggest you check out some of her work as well...
Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. If I did Kankuro, Shikamaru, and Deidara would have killed Sasuke by now... Since I do not, Sasuke gets to live... sadly.
Chapter 1- Naruto
"If you attack Konoha... I will have to fight you... so save up your hatred and take it all on me... I'm the only one who can take it! It's the only thing I can do! I will shoulder your hatred and die with you!"
-Naruto speaking to Sasuke
The letter that ended up in the Kazekage's hands was a deceiving little note. Its outlined edge crisp and sharp with a beautiful design of a green dragon and the leaf village insignia, show its origin right away. The offensive thing looked like it accompanied an invitation for a wedding, a festival, even a baby shower; something non-offensive and sweet. Little did Gaara know that it was by far one of the worst letters he could ever receive.
Gaara should have been suspicious of the content of the letter before he even held the thing in his hands though just by the appearance and actions of his older brother. Kankuro, strangely enough, was the one to give him the postage. And even on first glance he could tell the seal had been violated letting him in on the fact that Kankuro had gotten to it first. This was strange indeed; the older puppet master never opened anything of Gaara's before he could read it. He was the Kazekage after all. What frightened Gaara the most, though, was the grey, ashy tone his older brother had taken on as he walked with shaky tentative footfalls into his office. He didn't look like he would shatter but looked as if something else in his life was about to. Worse he could read Kankuro's face so easily, not something the puppeteer did often making it seem as though it where his job to expel hard emotions. But now, Gaara could see all that Kankuro was not hiding: fear. Kankuro fumbled forward numbly and mumbled something about a letter. He handed it to Gaara not leaving the room, but standing there as though he were waiting for the inevitable. It was too much for Gaara's curiosity to not read the thing. And so, when Gaara tore it out of its nice coated envelope, he had expected everything but this.
Inside the note was a spidery, well-thought-out, hand-written note, its pen a deep black color that could match the night sky. The parchment was a starch yellow color but besides that his eyes held nothing but the content of the letter. He read slowly to start, taking in every fine swirled letter as his eyes fluttered the page. However, when reaching the end he did not stop; in shock, he reread it, again and again, as if would somehow make the words disappear or prove them to be untrue. But even with all his will, they would not fade.
He looked up at Kankuro in utter shock, as though he had just had a kunai ripped through his chest. But now, looking at his brother's face, he could finally see the true emotions written behind his face-painted appearance. There was worry for him and him alone. But Gaara didn't know how to feel: his insides swarmed and buzzed with the old familiar inklings of pain and stinging guilt. He blinked several times to restore his vision: as though he was fading out with each one. He dropped the paper upon the desk with one hand, lightly, as if he were afraid to rip the thing in half would cause even more damage on his soul.
"He's dead…" Gaara said in stunned disbelief, saying the words in such a manner that he hoped he would talk himself out of his shock just by the ridiculousness of the concept. He felt a large, familiar hand on his left shoulder. He didn't reject the touch, but continued to stare in confusion at his brother standing above him.
"Gaara…" Kankuro trailed off, seemingly unsure of what to say next. His older brother was not good at giving emotional speeches, Gaara knew that, but for some reason slight irritation rose up in his chest at Kankuro wanting to give him one… Surely, Kankuro did not believe the lies that spawned from the letter? He glanced at it again, catching the bottom signature of the current Hokage, making it seem official but Gaara knew better. Nothing could kill him. Nothing. Gaara was positive about it.
"T-This can't be real, Kankuro. He is not dead." Gaara stammered as he picked himself off his chair and stood up, flinging the letter and the envelope to the floor. The older sand sibling tightened his hand on his brother's shoulder. Gaara's head was hung low, a glint of pure terror and confusion seemingly trapped behind his lashes. "He couldn't die… he hasn't become Hokage yet. It's not possible he went down with Uchiha… he's stronger than that…" He tried to reason with the truth in his mind, but could come up with no reasonable excuse.
"He sacrificed himself for their village, Gaara." Kankuro spoke quietly. Gaara's eyes widened in disbelief and distant dread. "He knew what he was doing."
Tears threatened to fall now. Out of all the things Gaara had conceived himself would come to pass, this was not one of them. He had always believed Naruto was untouchable, his kindness and understanding none could rid of. He believed, that if he could help him find humanity, than there was no one he couldn't reach. Yet fate, seemed to smile cruelly on Gaara's once firmly, held beliefs. And, for a moment, a guilty stab penetrated his body as he wished he had crushed Sasuke Uchiha when he had had the chance all those years ago. For that blue haired traitor, had just taken away one of the closest bonds he held, making him feel worthless- and more importantly, useless. He was the Kazekage; why was he still failing to protect everyone?
Tears, he forgot he could still shed, rolled down his smooth face. A warm pair of arms encircled his chest. He knew it was Kankuro and did not pull away. He leaned against his older brother as he let tears fall, tears that he could not remember shedding since Yahamaru's betrayal. It felt strange, but his brother's comforting words made the experience less gruesome than the last time. Sighing, Gaara turned around and put his face into Kankuro's chest. Kankuro gasped at the sudden movement, but did not reject him either way. Gaara stood there, tears still escaping, despite the fact he had no mental decision to let them continue. He remained there his brother's arms surrounding him, as though they wanted to get rid of the pain for him, to share it, with him. Gaara knew Kankuro could never fully understand the bond between, Naruto and him, but he accepted the words of comfort and took in the smell of Kankuro's scent, letting it be an escape from the moment. His brother's scent was a sweet smell, that hinted of a slight speak of wood shavings, as though he had been tinkering with one of his puppets moments before. It was a comforting scent, one that he attributed and immediately connected to: Home, family, and safety. But at the same time was still utterly Kankuro's. And it was Kankuro who held him tightly as they both stood in his office, even though the world seemed smaller to Gaara more than it ever had.
After minutes of just tears and the sensation of his brother's comforting words as he rubbed small soothing circles in the back of Gaara's back, the door blew open. A flustered Temari ran in, her fan waving widely from side to side. "I just heard the news!" She announced, not taking in the scene until her eyes connected with Kankuro's despondent and concerned gaze. The jonin was not crying- and most likely would not for the kid in the orange jump suit but he looked ready to do so for Gaara's behalf.
"Gaara…" She mouthed at the shuddering form Kankuro was shielding with his arms. He looked so small in the taller boy's arms; there was none of his usual strength and determination that he possessed. Instead, there was a hurt and confused boy, standing in the room not quite able to understand why life could be so cruel. Temari walked forward eyeing Kankuro sadly getting his unspoken message. Her youngest brother was hurting. Badly.
Without thought, Temari wrapped her arms around Gaara's back giving both Kankuro and Gaara a warm semi-hug. Gaara stiffened and sniffled loudly, but eventually relaxed into the hug between all three sand siblings. It was a rare moment: Gaara was sandwiched between his two older siblings, his sister's warm breath reaching down his neck, and his face against his brother's chest so tightly he could hear his heartbeat. They did not usually express things in this manner, but despite it being different, Gaara still appreciated them. It made his world seem a little less devastated, even though he had just taken a hard blow, one he knew would take time to heal.
"I think we should get ready to go…" Temari whispered. She brought one hand up to Gaara's head and pulled slowly at small chunks of his red hair. Kankuro nodded, Temari stepped back, but did not relinquish his hold until Gaara looked ready to move. Gaara complied, wiping away his tears, his eyes strangely red and blood-shot.
"You're right; we must set out to Konoha right away." He said, his voice low and sad but more Gaara-like in nature. "…You can let go now, Kankuro." His older brother blushed slightly in embarrassment, but nodded and stepped back but kepping a hand at Gaara's shoulder, just in case.
"Come on, Gaara. Let's get ready." Kankuro spoke slowly testing every word in his head before saying them. Gaara nodded weakly, and the three ninjas walked out the door and began to pack their belongings.
Gaara insisted that they not bring a royal escort filled with hundreds of unnecessary people. He wanted to move quickly and quietly to the Leaf Village. so Gaara's two siblings and Masturi set out. Baki had wished to go, but needed to take care of Gaara's position while he was gone; he sent his condolences. The whole journey there was tiresome, and Gaara could feel his siblings gazes set on him the entire time.
However, he didn't though, promising himself he would not shed another tear until the ceremony was over. He was the Kazekage; he had to represent his village well. Breaking down and blaming the world in front of everyone was no way for him to act. He felt slightly broken but he wasn't sure he could handle a full break down. He had never lost so much; he wasn't sure his heart was open for much more inner pain.
They arrived at the Leaf Village, which had become a literal place or mourning. The town was in ruin from the recent fight, and the streets were empty as they prepared for the funeral of the boy that had saved them all but lost it all at the same time. It was a sobering, gut-retching sight; worse was the state of Naruto's companions.
The pink haired girl, Sakura, who had saved his brother from poisoning, seemed completely lost. Her once calm and grateful smile was marred with the need to shed tears that she was holding back. Her usual voice was small and lost like a child and Gaara remembered that she used to be on a team with both the Uchiha and Naruto. It made Gaara's stomach turn at the idea of losing Temari and Kankuro at the same time. He tried to sympathize with her butut she waved it off through her sorrow and showed them where they would be staying.
Upon arriving at their guest residence given to them by the Hokage, Gaara saw many other companions or once-friends of Naruto's. He saw the canine boy and his large dog sitting despondently while trying to comfort the raven-haired Huuga clan kid, who was pushed up to his chest much like Kankuro had done for Gaara days ago. The dog sat by, whimpering as they passed though, unnoticed by except by the other boy with large dark glasses and a pulled up coat. He said nothing, but even Gaara could tell by the slight slump in his shoulders, that he felt like the rest of the village: confused and hurt.
Instead of splitting up like they usually did when they were in Konoha, the sand siblings stuck together. They were all dressed in mourning clothes out of a sign for respect. No one spoke to them, but the sand shinobi weren't really in the mood to listen, anyway. Throughout the day, they saw the spiky pony tailed haired boy that Temari spoke of often. His face was void of emotion, as were the rest of his team mates. The large one with long hair was not eating, a thing which Gaara found disheartening; the only thing he had seen this large boy with brown hair do was eat.
The day fluttered on like a surreal dream. Onlookers, saying nothing but the occasional sympathies and hello's, attempted to hide their feelings of pain as well. Gaara didn't know how much pain they felt from Naruto's death, but he did know that they didn't their friends in such a sad lonely state. It affected them all: Naruto was just a person who was like that. It saddened Gaara beyond belief that he had never truly been able to repay the boy for all he had done for him.
The eerily silent day passed on. At twilight, where the moon was beginning to want to take over, and the sun was thinking about sleep, all the people from the village both big, small, and in between came to the funeral. There was a large casket with a cheeky picture of Naruto when had been 12 sitting on top of it. The sight made Gaara sick; the thought of the boy who had saved his life literally and figuratively laying still and motionless, being prepared to be buried along with all the other ninja's who had died in action, was horrifying.
Rain began to fall, a pitter-patter on the dirt, grass barren, ground under their feet as they all stood in silence. Some light sobbing could be heard from several different places. The preacher spoke and then opened the floor for some final words. Everyone said something: All the leaf nin thanked their friend for his sacrifice, the older jonins apologized that it had to end like this, and even Temari and Kankuro went up and gave a toned sentiment expressing their sadness. Temari simply said sorry for all the things she had called or insulted him and wished she could have admitted to him how great of a ninja he was. Kankuro was a little bit more somber, his words choice and few but none the less prominent as he told of his confession to Naruto to save his brother. Having never heard this story before, Gaara was shocked, but he said nothing and let his brother continue on about how much he owned Naruto and forever would be grateful for saving his family. Once everyone had gone, Gaara knew he would have to speak. He just didn't know what to say. He couldn't say good-bye because it brought to much pain and he couldn't apologize because he couldn't voice his guilt without ripping his soul apart with it.
So instead he encouraged them to think of the future, to lean on one another. To take light in the sacrifices the young leaf genin had given them. He pushed them to keep living and to keep looking forward, because the world still needed them to carry on with the next generation.
It was all true, and he managed to keep as much of the pain he felt out of it. He wanted to move on himself: he knew he would eventually. He would have to. He was the Kazekage of a village and couldn't let such a thing weigh him down. Yet, even as he watched all the leaf's top ninjas walk past him and place a single flower on the casket, creating stacks. Gaara couldn't help but think his world had dimmed a little.
Because without Naruto Uzimaki, the world was just not as bright.
A/N: Hehehe... Well, no one kill me, please! I'm going to repeat my first sentiment in saying, I'm sorry! I really didn't really want to write a death-fic but the evil idea wouldn't leave me alone till' I was finished! If you have any personal statement to take up with me about how I just killed off the shows main character without batting an eye, please, PM me. If not, than please review. I do enjoy those. Also, no flames please. You will be bluntly ignored if it isn't real criticism... And I really don't like bluntly ignoring people, so please don't make me do so.
Next Chapter: Kankuro
