Title - Sometimes The Past Catches Up With You By - PheonixFireBlack Summary - (First 'The OC' fic!) A girl from Ryan's past finds him and, without really meaning to, she causes problems with his relationship with Marissa. All she wanted was help from an old friend, she didn't want to create problems with his relationship or fall in love with him--again. WARNING: Mention of cutting for reason of crying and drug use Feedback - I love it! It makes an author happy. lol IM - Its in my profile. Message me! Rating - PG-13 for some mild language. And if you didn't catch it in the summary: WARNING: Mention of cutting for reason of crying and drug use.

A/N - Ok, I have missed...oh I dunno, half the episodes cause it conflicts with Angel and...I tape it to watch it later...life sucks, especially when two of your favorite shows conflict with each other...*sigh* Oh well...there'll be reruns, right? Oh, if you know when they play re-runs of The OC, leave that for me in your review lol! So, yeah, anyway, sorry for any major OOC-ness from anyone. Anyhow, I think I'll just shut up and let you guys read now, sound good? Ok, later! Oh...and this is all going to be done from my character's P.O.V.

~*~*~*~

I had to get away from him. He had been doing this for almost a month, I needed to find my old friend. He'd help me. I know he will. I have to get away from Brandon, and find him. I had tried to get away last week, but that atempt jumped out the window and killed itself when Brandon had caught me. But I won't get caught this time. I'm leaving at two in the morning, he'll be out and gone by then. It was about two now, so I was shoving some clothes, my cd's, my cd player, and a few other various things into my bag. I had to get out of here, out of Chino, I have to find my old friend. I know that he'll help me, he was my best friend. I zipped the duffel bag up and grabbed my keys. I ran down the stairs of my house and out the front door. I threw the bag into the back of my '94 Nissan Sentra, got in the car myself, and backed out of the driveway. I know where he is, he was in OC, and last I had heard from him, he was staying with the...what was the family's name? Oh yeah, it was like...Cohen or something. Yeah, that sounded right, Cohen. I had to find their house, or at least him. The drive from Chino to Orange County was fairly long and I knew I probably shouldn't be driving this late, having only woken up an hour ago to get all of my stuff ready, but I had to leave Brandon, he was a drunk, high, bastard that had started hitting me, really hitting me, a few weeks ago. I had tried to get away a few weeks ago but, as I had been thinking earlier, that atempt had failed. I wouldn't fail now, he had no clue of my leaving and I was already almost to Orange County, and I was thanking God. Partly because it meant I was far from Brandon, and partly because I wasn't sure that I could drive for too terribly much longer. I pulled over to the side of the road after driving for another fourty or so minutes. I couldn't drive any more, I was about to fall asleep at the wheel. I'd just have to find him tomorrow.

~*~*~

The next morning around seven or eight, the sun came shining through my car windows and woke me up. I groaned, "Nu-uh...I don't wanna get up..." Then suddenly, I sat up, "Omygod! Did I leave mama and dad a note or something?" After thinking about it for a few moments I remembered that, no, I didn't. I pulled my bag from the back seat and dug around until I found my cell phone. I turned it on and called my parents, even though we don't have a very good relationship, I still called and told them where I was. They sort of understood, they were angry but they knew they couldn't really stop me, my eighteenth birthday was in a few days. After I was done with the conversation with my parents, I started the car up and pulled onto the road, in order to find him. I knew that I'd just have to look around town and whatnot but I would found him. I stopped at a little place, to me it looked like a reastraunt. I soon found out it was a Kwik Check combined with a Pizza Hut. I shrugged, oh well, I was wrong. Maybe someone around here would know who and where he was. I walked up to the counter, "Um...excuse me, ma'am, I need some information."

The light haired girl behind the counter looked at the dark haired girl in front of her, "Yes?"

"I was wondering, do you know Ryan Atwood?"

"Uh, yeah, actually...he's my boyfriend."

"Boyfriend...right." I muttered to myself, "Do you know where he is?"

"Why do you want to know?" The girl was obviously skeptical about telling me anything. "Who are you?"

"My name's Riley MacIntyre, I'm a friend from Chino. I just kind of needed to talk to Ryan."

"Oh...well, uh, I'm not sure where he is exactly right now, but--" She paused, seeing someone come into the store, "There he is right now." She smiled.

I turned and saw him. It had been so long, it was kind of shocking to see him and his sandy blonde hair and blue eyes. It had been several years and it was just...really strange seeing him again. I started towards him, "Ryan?"

Ryan turned at his name being called and saw the originator of the calling. It was a girl with black hair, reaching past her shoulders, and bright blue eyes. "Riley?"

I grinned, "Wasn't sure you'd remember me, with all the highlife stuff an' all."

"Ha, ha, ha." Ryan said sarcastically before pulling me into a hug. "Long time no see," He said as we separated.

"Well, no doy! Hello...I moved to Canada for two years and when I moved back to Chino you were gone! I was highly insulted. I thought you ran away from me....then I figured out why you were really here."

Ryan rolled his eyes. That was Riley MacIntyre for you. "Still haven't changed, I see."

"Oh, yeah, right cause I'm gonna change. HA! Fat chance. The day I change, is the day the world ends, and Sirius becomes a prefect."

"Who? What?"

I shook my head, "Nevermind. Anyway...I need to talk to you."

"Riley, I don't know if you've realized this or not but, you are talking to me."

It was my turn to roll my eyes, "I mean...alone."

Ryan frowned but complied, "Alright...When?"

"A-Sap."

Ryan sighed, "Come on." He glanced at Marissa and shrugged, "Sorry." He mouthed. She nodded, "It's ok." She mouthed back.

Ryan followed me out to my car. I got in the driver's seat and unlocked the front passengers seat from inside. Ryan got in and sat down, "Plan on going somewhere?"

I shook my head and closed the door, "Close your door."

"Why?"

"If you don't, I'm not talking, and this will all be a waste of time."

Ryan did as he was instructed, closing the door, "Now, what is it that's so secretive?"

"Do you remember that guy I was dating when you left?"

"Brandon?"

I nodded, "Yeah...well....I'm still dating him...or...I was."

"What?"

"I left the drunk, high bastard a note, we're through but...that's kind of what I wanted to talk to you about. When he finds the note, he'll know that I left and he'll probably know where I went. I don't think he'll come after me but, if he does..." I trailed off and looked down.

"What? What'll happen if he does, Riley?"

I glanced back up at him, "I think he'll hurt me and anyone around me. Maybe this was a bad idea...I should have just stayed at home. I shouldn't have gotten up at two in the morning to drive here...I-I shouldn't have done any of this."

"Riley, if he comes here, if he does follow you, you won't have to worry."

"Why? Because I won't have any friends around here? I knew I shouldn't have come here. I won't even fit in around here."

"You think I fit in?"

I smirked, "I don't guess you would, huh?"

"No. But...if he does come, you still don't have to worry, even if you do have friends."

"But why not?" Ryan gave her a look, "Right...you'll beat the bloody hell out of him, right?"

"Bloody hell?"

"Too much BBCA."

Ryan laughed, "BBCA?"

"Yeah...anyway...that chick in there, says she's your girlfriend?"

"Uah...yeah. Marissa."

"So you are dating someone. When I asked you in my last letter you said 'No'. Why'd you lie to me?"

"Because I didn't think I'd have a girlfriend at the time."

I raised an eyebrow as we both got out of the car, "Why--Lock the door--the hell not?"

When we met a little from the car again, Ryan answered me, "Well...she told me she loved me..."

"Uh-huuuuh. Aaaand?"

"Uh...I didn't have the best response."

"What was it? It wasn't like when I told you was it?"

"Thank you."

"Nope...not like with us...I told you and then you just sat there. Looking like you'd seen ten ghosts of dead people that you like...knew or something."

Ryan laughed, "Yeah...can we...not talk about us right now?" He asked as we re-entered the store/Pizza Hut.

"Yeah...I understand, she's one of those seriously normal girlfriend types who doesn't want to know about any of your ex's, right?"

"And what do you call yourself?"

"I call myself lots of things but none of these things are the word 'normal'. Come on, what girlfriend have you had other than me that actually asked about your ex girls?"

"Can't say any..."

I laughed, "Sometimes when I would do that, the poor guy would just run away, scared of me."

Marissa stood watching the girl, Riley was the name she thought she caught Ryan calling her earlier, as she and Ryan talked. This girl was totally flirting, and skirting on territory that she shouldn't be on. Ryan wasn't her boyfriend, she was Marissa's. 'This must be what jealousy feels like' Marissa thought as she took to the costumer that was at her counter at the moment.

"So, have you told her?" I asked.

"What?"

"Marissa...have you told her that you--"

"No." Ryan said immediately.

I frowned, "But...why not? I mean, you do l--"

"Yes but..."

"Afraid of commitment?"

He gave her another look, "What do you think?"

"Right..." I sighed, "Dammit..." I muttered.

"What now?"

"I have suddenly realized that I have no where to stay...and my car wasn't that comfy or safe-feeling last night... I really didn't like that feeling last night."

"Maybe I can convince the Cohen's to let you stay with them?" Ryan suggested.

"Well, I dunno...I don't wanna be like...a burden or whatever--"

"Riley..."

"Ok, ok, it's a possible place to stay, I should be happy."

"Yeah, you should." Ryan said as he took his cell phone out. He called Sandy and Kirsten, ending talking to Kirsten. When he was done, it was official, "Riley, your staying at the Cohen's."

"Really?"

"Yeah. Kirsten said it's fine."

"This rocks! I just got here and I already have a place to stay. And besides that, I get to stay with my best friend!"

Ryan laughed, "Yeah..."

"Well....can I follow you there so I know where I'm staying and I can get my junk there?"

"Yeah, sure."

~*~*~

It was a few days later and I had long since become acquainted with Seth and I wasn't sure if I liked him or not. I thought that he was still deciding if he liked me or not as well. I got up around three in the morning clad in hardly anything. I really didn't think anyone would be awake so I hadn't bothered with putting any pants on. I had most definitely not expected to find Seth Cohen sitting at the table in the kitchen. I stopped, a bit inside the kitchen, when I noticed that Seth was sitting there, at the table, in nothing but only his boxers. Suddenly, I decided I would remember that I was only in a tank top and my underwear.

Seth turned and saw the new occupant of the house. Riley was in nothing but a white tank top and her underwear. Seth's eyes widened, as did mine. I swallowed as I remembered what I was wearing, or what there was a lack of. Seth and I stared at each other in an awkward moment. Seth reached behind him and handed, me his robe, evidentally knowing that I was probably dying for one right about now. I took the silk robe with much gratitude. I hastily put it around me and tied the make-shift silk sash belt. "I-I uh...I didn't think....a-any-anyone else would be...awake..." I swallowed. This was awkward.

"I...didn't....either."

"Well, this is awkward..." I said. I needed to sit. I slowly walked over to the counter that was opposite the kitchen table and hopped up and sat there, swinging my legs.

Seth swallowed, though he didn't let Riley see, "So...what are you doing up?"

"Couldn't sleep...you?"

"Couldn't sleep." he repeated my excuse.

"Right...so...uh...why not?" I said, I hated silence, but I hated awkward silences even more. So I was breaking the stupid evil silence.

"I...Thoughts were keeping me up." He paused, "You?"

I nodded in agreement, "Yeah...me too..." I'd been thinking about Ryan. I found that he was crossing my mind more often. Sure, he had crossed my mind before but it wasn't as often as it was now. It was almost annoying.

"What...were your thoughts about?" Seth asked, trying to make conversation.

"Uh...stuff...you?"

"Same...just...stuff..."

"So..." I swung my legs back and forth, "You aren't...gonna tell anyone, right?"

"About what?" then he remembered, "Oh...uh...no...I won't be telling anyone that I saw the new occupant of my house dressing like my aunt, in merely a tank top and her underwear...no."

"That better be a true promise, Cohen."

"Don't worry...it is." Seth said. "I-I really won't tell anyone..."

If I was correct and my eyes and the dim kitchen light were neither decieveing me, Seth was blusing. I smirked, "You blushing, Cohen?"

Seth swallowed, "Uah...no...why? Where would you get that idea?"

"I don't know, it didn't have anything to do with the pinkish tinge on your cheeks."

This comment only made the blush deepen and Seth wasn't too comfortable with this. Blushing wasn't exactly something he liked to do. Seth ran a hand through his hair and sighed, "Just....shut up..." He mumbled.

I smiled. It was cute, Seth blushing and all. I slid off the counter and walked over to sit next to him at the table. "So...why were you blushing?" I teased him.

"Shut up..." He muttered again.

I grinned, "Come on, why?"

Seth shrugged, "I-I don't...Iii don't know."

I smiled, "Right. Of course you don't. " I sing-songed.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"That I know that you know why you were blushing."

"Do...you know why?" Seth asked, knowing that he knew but not sure if she did or not.

"I have an idea but...I dunno....it's probably wrong." I shrugged.

"Right...I...um...I'm gonna...go...g-go...go to bed." Seth said awkwardly.

"Uh...right....later..." I said almost just as awkwardly.

Seth started to get up and when he turned around, Riley stood up, "Wait..."

He turned back to face her. I knew that I never would have that Seth had a six-pack had any of this situation not happened, but...I was kind of liking it at the moment. I suddenly seemed to forget what I had been going to say. "I-I um...uh...Oh! Y-your robe, are you going to want your...robe back?"

"Uh...no...it's ook." Seth stuttered before turning around and walking back to his room.

"He was acting really weird..." I muttered to myself. "Maybe he like me?...No...Not Seth...." I sighed and shook my head, "Oh I don't know!" I threw her hands up in defeat. I walked over and crashed on the couch.

She would soon awaken, in another three hours later and find the object of her new obsession lying next to her, and she would figure that she wasn't sure why he was there.

~*~*~

Three hours later, I was woken up by something. I had moved and something pulled her closer, or maybe the correct word was someone. I didn't know who, but someone had his arm around my waist. Good Lord did I hope it wasn't Seth. Sure, he was ok and all but...I like Ryan--No, correction--I still like Ryan. I opened my eyes to see just who had his arm around me. I looked over my shoulder to find, none other than Ryan Atwood. I blinked. This must be a really great dream of mine, because this would never happen in real life. Not to me. Plus, he had a girlfriend and Ryan was loyal, he wouldn't do this. Not in real life. I took the only free arm she had and reached over and tapped him on the shoulder. Unless he really changed alot, Ryan was a fairly light sleeper. Just as I'd hoped, Ryan stirred and woke up. "Wha--" And he was awake. "Riley? What are you--"

"I could ask you the same thing." I said, indicating their current situation.

Ryan blinked and saw that he had his arm around Riley's waist. His eyes widened and he moved away from her like she were fire that was burning him.

"Didn't know I was that repulsive."

"No, it's not that. It's just...Marissa and...loyalties and, and--"

I turned on her other side and gave him a look, "Ryan. I was kidding, its called a joke."

"Right...sorry...I just--"

"It's ok. Really. It's fine. I understand. You have a girlfriend, loyalties. I know."

"Really, Riley, I--"

"Ryan. Shut up...please? I just wanna go back to sleep, kay?"

He nodded, "Right..sleep...it's a good thing...sleep."

"Yeah...so...I'm gonna do that...like, now, kay?" I asked. Ryan seemed to be acting really strange.

"I-right. Ok..uh...tomorrow then, right?"

"Uh...yeah, I guess." I turned back over and tried to sleep. I knew I'd never get to sleep, I had just had Ryan Atwood's arm around my waist. There would sooo not be any more sleep tonight. Oh how wrong I was. Within the hour, I was out like a light.

Ryan, on the other hand, was far from sleep.He couldn't believe how he'd just woken up. He had his arm around his best friend. And he'd been asleep on the couch. He didn't even remember getting up and coming to the couch. No--wait--yes he did. Now. Now of all times. This doesn't make sense. I'm in love with Marissa...right? I mean...No...I didn't...tell her when she told me but...Iii was too shocked. I-I love her...right? Right. Then...why did I...what's with...I don't understand this. I don't like Riley...she's just my friend, right? Ryan thought as he sat there, watching Riley sleep. He never did this with Marissa...then again, he'd never actually been in this kind situation with Marissa. Ryan sighed and shook his head before standing and going to his room and laying down. He needed to get some sleep and leave Riley to her own devices.

~*~*~

The next morning was really awkward between the three teens, more so between Seth and I. Seth and I were the first to awaken in the house. I had dressed before going into the kitchen. I wasn't about to have a repeat of last night, it would have been way too embarassing, especially if it was in front of Sandy, Kirsten, and Ryan--especially Ryan. I entered the kitchen to find Seth sitting at the table, just like last night, only this time he had a shirt on--which kind of sucked, I had to admit, but oh well, there was always summer later in the year, right? Of course! Except for the fact that it was dead in the middle of winter still, but other than that it was still something to look foreward to, right?

Seth glanced up at Riley when she entered the room, and he immediately looked away. At least she was dressed this time and not half-naked--and to really be truthful, he wasn't either, thank God. He was really starting to wonder what was going on. He wasn't sure if he liked her or not--It was weird, almost like, outwardly he didn't like her but inwardly...he was totally crushing on her. But he knew he couldn't like her, no way. He'd only met her four days ago, he didn't even really know her so, how could he like her? Why did life have to be so weird and confusing all the time?

I walked over and sat next to him, in the same chair from last night, and I spoke. "So...uh, last night...it was weird, huh?" I really had to try and make conversation in the horrible evil silence. I really dispised silence-- It was creepy.

"Heh...yeah, weird is definately one word that come to mind." And embarrasing is another....man, when I turned around that one time...she looked so repulsed....wow, i didn't even know I knew the word repulsed. Huh...learn something new every day, eh?

"So...uh..." I paused, "What'd ja think?" I asked trying to bring humor to the situation and failing, pretty misrably.

Seth's eyes widenend and he could feel the blood rushing to his cheeks...again. "I-Uh-Wha-Bu-a-b-awha--"

"Stop. Now. No more speaking for you." I said. "It was a joke. Does no one around here know how to take a joke?" I threw her hands up in the air. "Oyi!

"What do you mean?"

"N-Nothing..." I shook her head, "Nothing."

"Right...so..." Seth was actually at a loss for words.

"Wooow....your at a loss for words...never thought that day would come..."

"What? You don't even know me."

"I feel like I know all of you: Marissa, Summer, Anna, you...all of you. It's strange but in the last few months, just through the letters Ryan's sent me, it's like I know all of you." I smiled. "So...Now what?"

"About last night..." Seth started.

"Oh...last night...wow, last night was...heh...wow...last night was awkward..." I said, lightly rubbing the back of my neck.

"Yeah...Awkward...definately."

At that moment, Ryan walked in and raised an eyebrow at the other two, "What happened last night."

"Nothing. Nothing at all happened last night." Seth said.

At the same time, I said, "We saw each other in and...it was....really strange." Seth and I looked at each other, then back to Ryan. I squeezed my eyes shut for a second. Great....that was juuuust great....

"Well...that just about clears everything up." Ryan said sarcastically.

"Nothing happened." I said.

"We saw--What?" Seth said just as she said that nothing happened.

"What?" I shook my head, "I thought you would have said nothing again, so I did and...well...should we even be talking about....last night?" I asked, not only Seth but Ryan as well.

Seth shook his head, almost furiously, "No..."

At the same time, Ryan was shaking his head, "No."

The two boys looked at each other, "What?" They shook their heads. This was just too weird, too much...unison!

"Ok, why don't we all just shut up for like...twenty seconds...maybe the unified speaking will stop if we just...shut up." I spoke suddenly.

During those twenty seconds of silecne, Kirsten came down and entered the kitchen. She looked from Ryan, to her own son, and finally to Riley. "What's going on?"

The three teenagers stayed quiet for a few more seconds then I answered, "We were all staying quiet for thrity seconds so we would all stop talking at the same time." I nodded, "That's all." I grinned.

"Right...I'll nod...like I actually understand."

"Ok!" I shouted. "That's great! Parents are always doing stuff like that...well...if you have the right kind of parents, right?"

Ryan nodded slightly before sitting down. He still had all of last nights images and thoughts in his head so, needless to say, he was slightly distracted.

Evidentally, Ryan had the look of being distracted because, just after Kirsten left, saying that she had to go to the grocery store, I turned to him, "What's up?"

At first, it would seem that Ryan didn't hear her. However, after a moment he looked at her and slowly asked, "What?"

"What's up? You're all...distracted-y..." I looked thoughtful for a moment, "Somehow that doesn't work as well when your not Buffy...hm...oh well."

"Uh...nothing just...thinking about last night."

"Oh." Came my simple response.

"Yeah..."

"So...something happened with you two last night?" Seth asked, starting to get slightly jealous of Ryan.

I shook my head, "No...not really. I just woke up and he...never..mind." I trailed off from the look I was getting from Ryan.

"What?" Seth asked.

I shook my head again, "It was nothing. Really....it wasn't anything."

~*~*~

Several weeks went by with no happenings and I had nothing to do during the day. I had gotten to graduate a year early for some reason that I didn't remember last year at school. I should probably try and get a job so I can go places on the weekends...or on days like today. When the other two were in school and I had nothing better to do. I looked at the clock and sighed, "They should be here any minute now." Just as I said this, the door swung open and the two boys entered. I looked towards the door and smiled. Ryan was soooo sexy, especially when he had the look like he was going to kill someone soon on his face. No--wait--that shouldn't be sexy, that should be scary. "Plan on killin' someone today, Atwood?"

"Maybe..." He shot a glare at Seth.

"What? I didn't mean to let that slip...it not like this is my fault! I didn't know you liked her! Your with Marissa, how am I supposed to know?"

"Because, you don't even know her. I've known her for a long time."

"What does that have to do with anything?"

"When I figure that out, I'll tell you. Right now. I'm about to kill you though so...ya know, no one cares."

"I think my parents might care if you like...kill me. I don't think they'd be to happy to find their son dead on the kitchen floor." He paused, "And it's not like I can control who I like...it just happens, you know?"

"Whatever, man."

"Who, what, when, where, why, and how?" I asked Ryan, following him into his room.

"Can't say who, we both like her, as of today, at school, I don't know, and yet again, I have no clue."

"Why can't you say who? I know her? Cause I don't know many people here and that'd be a shock."

"Yeah...you know her."

"Well...is it Summer? Anna? Can't be Marissa, can it?"

He shook his head, "No...it isn't any of them."

"Then...who is it? Are you sure I've met her? Cause the only othe rher around here that I know, is me and..." I laughed, "Yeah right!"

Ryan smirked but looked a little uneasy. Riley didn't seem to notice though. "So..." Ryan started.

"Ya want me outta your room? Cause ya know you can just say so."

He nodded slightly, "If...you don't mind."

I shrugged, "Alright, catch ya later." I said as she turned around to leave. For some reason, I had half expected Ryan to stop me but when he didn't I came to a decision. I've obviously been watching waaaay too much tv. I then proceeded to flop down on the couch. I was kind of starting to wonder if Seth was stalking me. I mean, he's like...everywhere I am...it's kind of creepy. Then again...we live in the same house, there's always a chance that we'll be in the same room at the same time. Even if it doesn't make sense that this has hapened almost everday this week...maybe it's just a coincidence.... I thought, glancing at Seth, who was on the other side of the couch. "Ok...this is officially creepy."

Seth looked at her, "What?"

"We keep ending up in the same room at the same time. It's been happening practically since that...one...night."

At first Seth looked confused then it was suddenly all clear. "Right...that...night." Seth didn't like Riley brining that up repeatedly but, she did. It really wasn't exactly something he liked re-living so much.

I sighed, "Sorry I keep brining that up...it's just--"

"It's ok...a little weird and not exactly something I'd like to actually relive but...yeah."

"I really hadn't thought anyone would be up..." I sighed again.

After several minutes of complete silence, I stood up, "I gotta get outta this house! I've been in the house, since I got here! I'm bored, I'm exploring. Later, Seth." With that, I took off to my room. This didn't make much sense to Seth seeing as she had just said she needed to get out of the house but he ignored it.

I emerged from my room a little later, clad in a pair of black ankle-boots, a black tank top, a pair of worn, low-rise jeans and to top it all off, I was actually wearing makeup. I had a silver-light blue mixture of eyeshadow, black eye-liner, and red lip gloss. Just to make everything better, more or less for my own satisfaction, I was wearing the black leather duster that Ryan had so graciously coughed up almost two hundred dollars for my sixteenth birthday. Needless to say, I had gone aboslutely ballistic and the duster was pretty well worn. It was actually starting to look like Spike's duster, from Buffy the Vampire Slayer, or at least that's what I liked to think. Just when I had come out of her room, Ryan had come out of his own.

"Where are you going?"

"I, my dear friend who coughed up tons of money to buy the leather duster that I am currently wearing, am going out to explore the wonderful OC. Is that ok with you?" I asked half-sarcastically.

"You've really gotten wear out of that thing."

"Well duh! It's a black leather duster like Spike's! What? Did you think it would just hang in my closet after all the fuss I made over it when you got it for me? Right. HA! Fat chance! I even wore it after you gave it to me, mind you, last time I checked, my birthday is in June...but I still wore it anyway." I shook my head, "No more do I do that...I learned very quickly that it got too hot."

"You are one of a kind, MacIntyre."

"And you are one of a cliche, Atwood."

"What?"

I rolled my eyes, "Come on , if bad boy with crappy parents moves in with good life people and softens up isn't a cliche, there isn't one."

"What are you talking about? That's not what's happened."

"Then what has happened? Come on, you never would have dated someone like Marissa back a year ago."

"I haven't been here for a year."

"That's beside the point. Even the few months that it's been since you came here, you still never would have dated a girl like Marissa."

Ryan looked at her for a moment, "What type of girl would you think I'd date?"

"Someone more like...I don't know, just not like Marissa...more like...uh...I dunno...me or someone with a past...not...some goody-goody good life chick." I really hoped he hadn't heard that 'me' that had slipped out.

"You? Didn't we try that already?"

"Well....I just meant me in the hypothetical sense, you know? In the sense that I have a past, and it doesn't include cruises, major cash vacay's, and yachts."

"Right. I'm sure that exazctly what you meant." Ryan said, a smirk forming on his face.

"Hey! What's that supposed to mean?"

"Why don't you figure it out, MacIyre?" He paused, "Anyway, weren't you supposed to be exploring by now?"

"Oh...yeah, almost forgot about that." I turned on my heel, "See ya later, Atwood." And with that, I was gone.

~*~*~

The weeks went on, and on, and on, and on, and--Well, I think you get the point--the weeks just seemed to drone and carry on forever. Just when I thought it would never happen, it did. I had yet to know that I was about to get Ryan into BIG trouble with Marissa. I didn't mean for her to find us the way we were, I didn't want to create problems with Ryan's relationship with the girl. Yes, I like him but this wasn't intentional. I had noticed how close the two were over the two months that I had already been here. I really, truly, honestly never meant for this to happen. Confused? Well, you should be. Let's start from the beginning, shall we?

~*~*~

It all started Friday night. I had woken up at like, three in the morning, so, I did like I always do when I wake up like that. I went into the living room and I turned the TV on. I changed the chanel from some news station to Fuse. They were currently re-playing the Number 1 Countdown, the video was "(I Hate) Everything About You" by "Three Days Grace" I like this song but for some reason, it didn't pick me up or...do anything for me at all. IT was kind of a good song for later though, or maybe the video to later should be more like, "It Wasn't Me" by "Shaggy" or "Worst Day Ever" by "Simple Plan. or something like that. Anyway, back to the beginning of this all, right? Well, I watched FUSE for awhile and about half-way through the countdown, someone else came into the living room. I soon saw that it was Ryan. I silently thanked God that it wasn't Seth. It's not that he's a bad guy or anything, it was just annoying with all the times we had run into each other around the house after that one night. Ryan was about to double- back to his room but I stopped him, "Wait." I have no clue why I did that, that was a really moronic thing to do. But I did it and now I can't go back in time and fix it. Oh well, life sucks and you die, it's just the way it is.

Ryan stopped and turned around, "What?"

I simply gestured for him to come here. He did so and sat down next to me on the couch. "What is it, Ri?"

"I dunno...I just kind wanted to talk."

"About what?"

I shrugged, "I dunno...whatever. Anything, everything, Aneverything..." She laughed at her own combination of the two words.

Ryan shook his head, "Well, why don't you start, your the one that wants to talk."

And so I did and we talked for a few hours, before we both fell asleep. We wouldn't realize until morning when Marissa came to surprise Ryan that we were in a situation much like the last time this had happened.

~*~*~

Morning came and so did Marissa. She was going to surprise Ryan. It was their six-month anniversary and she had decided this was what she was going to do. She was going to go to the Cohen residence and make breakfast for him and there were a few other random things there, though this plan didn't go quite well as she would have hoped. Marissa had figured that Ryan would most definately still be asleep, which she soon found that he was. However, she didn't expected to find him on the couch, as well as Riley, and she most certainly hadn't expected to see Ryan with his arm around her waist. All she could manage was, "Oh. My. God. I can't believe you Ryan Atwood!"

That was all it took for both of us to slowly start coming to. I was first to do so and my eyes widened as I saw why Marissa was all "Oh my god! I can't believe you!" and whatnot. I moved from my current position on the couch and stood up, "Look, Marissa, this isn't what it looks like! We were-- "

"Not what it looks like? Come on, Riley, there's not too much more of what it could be." She looked at Ryan, "I can't believe you!"

"No, really, Marissa, this really wasn't what it looked like. Really, you've got to let me explain."

"And on our six-month anniversary!" She fumed and turnd on her heel.

I wasn't about to let that (currently in my eyes) bitch go without an explination. I ran past her and stood in front of the door, "Your not going anywhere until you let me or Ryan explain. You can choose who explains but your not leaving with out one."

Marissa rolled her eyes. This was so stupid. "Whatever. Just...move and let me leave."

"Is your girlfriend deaf, Ry?" I shouted to Ryan

"No, I'm not!" Marissa yelled. "But obviously you are. I told you to move and let me go!"

"And before that, I said your not leaving with out an explanation. Since you didn't choose I'll expalain." I pasued. Seeing she was going to at least have the desency to listen to me, I continued, "I woke up at like three in the morning last night, got up, came into the living room , watched tv for about an hour, when that hour was just about up, Ryan came into the livng room. He turned to leave but I stopped him, we talked for while and fell asleep. All you saw was the result of us falling asleep and shit happening while we were SLEEPING. If you go on a girlfriend-leave or break up with him over that, your a moron and a huge loser." I managed to say all of that in one breath.

Marissa looked still very disbelieving, "You could come up with something like that on the spot, couldn't you?"

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"It means, I'm sure you've been in these kind of situations before, laying on the couch or in the bed with someone else's boyfriend. It also means that you can come up with excuses real fast and quick on the spot because of the past similar situations."

"You bitch! You stupid, sodding, moronic, goody-goody good life, cruises, major cash vacay's, and yachts, bitch!" I rambaled on, knowing that when I come back and look at what I said, like now, that it would make no sense. "I can't belive you are that stupid. And you judged me before you knew me." I shook my head. She was really being a true bitch right now.

"If anyone's a bitch, it's you. Your his little bitch on the side, right?" She turned to Ryan, "By the way, in case you couldn't tell or you didn't get it, we're through. We're over, gone, buh-bye, sinanora!" She turned back to Riley, "Now move and let me out of here."

"No." I said flatly.

"Why not?"

"I want you to know what you really are."

"I already know that I'm a 'stupid, sodding, moronic, goody-goody good life bitch' okay? So just back off and let me leave."

"No." I said, just as flatly as before, "Your even more than that. You're a stupid, sodding, moronic, goody-goody good life, cruises, major cash vacay's, yachts, corruptive, seductive, friend stealing, bitch."

"Thanks for letting me know, now move."

I glared at her for several moments then stepped aside, letting her leave. As she ran off the Cohen's property, I yelled, "And if you want to steal someone's friend, next time, make sure they aren't any of my friends!" With that, I turned, slammed the door shut, walked over and sat back down on the couch.

Ryan sighed and pressed his palms to his eyes before looking at Riley, "Riley...you do realize that you really didn't make that situation any better. If you would have just been quiet for long enough to let me talk to her, nothing like this would have happened."

"Oh..." I said, "So...it's my fault, is it? It's my fault that we talked. My fault that we fell asleep here on the couch. My fault that in the middle of the night at some point, you put your arm around my waist. It's my fault that Marissa came in and saw us like we were. Right? It's all my fault, just like it always was back home. My fault. Always my fault. Even if it was Emily or Lisa...it was really my fault, even if it was mama and dad's fault, it was my fault. Is that what your saying, Ryan? It's all my fault?" I went on and on.

Ryan knew that she didn't want to hear it but, but he had to say it, "It's not all your fault, it's me too but it is your fault that Marissa actually broke up with me. If you would have let me talk to her...she might not have done that."

I stood up and muttered, "My fault...it's really always my fault." I turned around and went out the door that Marissa had left from just moments ago. "It's not all your fault, he says, it's me too, he says, but no...in the end, it was all my fault. If you would have let me talk to her she might not have actually broken up with me, he says. Yeah right. She so would have broken up with him after what she said wether I opened my mouth or not. Why is it always my fault? How is it, that even when the blame is really someone else's, it always gets shoved off on me?" I had no clue where I was going, I was just walking aimlessly around. I soon found myself in a patch of woods that actually existed here. I climbed into one of the trees and sat there. Though, on the way up, I cut myself on one of the sharper small branches that was sticking on. "Dammit!" I shouted. Suddenly, as I sat there in the tree, an idea came to me. I knew what I would do to help myself with everything going on. I climbed back down the tree and ran back towards the Cohen home. I soon found myself in a small general store looking for something. I knew exactly what I was looking for, just not where to find it. I shook my head and decided to just as the cashier. I walked to the front of the store to the coutner, waited for the three costumers before me to be checked out. Finally, I got to speak with the cute guy behind the counter. He was no Ryan, but he was still cute. "Excuse me, I was wondering if you have any..."

~*~*~

A few hours later, I was sitting in a secret-type cornered place at the park. It was the place in the park where no one ever went, that little dark section that was always neglected. I was here more or less because I knew no one would catch me over here. I took the knife from my pocket and flicked it open. I looked at the blade and contemplated. Now that the moment of actually doing it was here, I wasn't so sure that I could actually do it. I shook my head and closed the knife and put it away back into my pocket. I stood up and went back to that little store. This time, instead of getting a knife, I was getting something in a little bit of a different taste--Or maybe it was just a different sound. No...sound isn't the right word either. Oh well, maybe I just can't think of the right thing right now, it'll come to me later...maybe. I walked to the counter again, the cute clerk guy had an odd look on his face that pretty much said 'What the hell are you doing back already?', though he didn't say anything, he simply rang up the bottles I had picked out and told me the cash total. I payed him for it and left, but nto before saying, "Maybe this is the last time for today."

~*~*~

Ryan was starting to wonder where Riley was. She had been gone for several hours. Maybe she'd gotten lost or, knowing Riley, she probably started talking to some guy and lost track of time. Just as he really started wondering about it, Riley walked into the house. "Hey everybody! What's up?"

Ryan shook his head, she was strange, that was the only thing that would always be certain. "Riley, hey."

"Whatcha doing?"

"Nothing...why?"

I shrugged, "Just wondering..." I tilted my head to the side and grinned before going off to my room. Once I got there I immediately locked the door. I couldn't chance anyone coming in, seeing me this way. After locking the door, I walked over and closed the blinds, no one could see this. I looked around the room and checked it over to make sure there were no other sources of anyone seeing what was going on. I nodded, satisfied. I took the bag out of my pocket and threw it on the bed, as well as the knife from earlier. I walked over and sat down in the center of the bed. I had taken a soda from the refridgerator before I'd come up. I took the three pills all at the same time, taking a sip of the Dr. Pepper. Somewhere in the back of my mind, I knew I shouldn't be doing this but I was, that thing in the back of my mind was too far back there for me to really realize it. I picked up the knife and flipped the blade out. I turned the small army knife over in my hand. Had the blinds not been closed, the blade probably would have shown in the light but...they were closed so, there was no silver blade shimmering in the nice sunlight. I took the knife and lay it on my wrist on its side. I still wasn't sure if I was really going to do this. And before I knew it, there was blood coming from my wrist, on the blade, even a few drops on the bedspread. I blinked. I didn't even know I'd done it. Before I knew it, I had two more cuts just under the first one, actually the second one. I guess I did cut myself once when I was in the park. But...I didn't remember that happening. I felt my eyes widen when the knock on my door sounded. I swallowed, "Who is it?" I tired to keep my voice as normal as I could.

"Are...you ok?"

It was Ryan. And...for some reason he souned worried. I don't know why, he doesn't have any reason to, does he? I don't know, maybe he does. "Y- Yeah...why?"

"I...saw blood on the sleeve of your shirt when you came in, I was just wondeirng where it came from..."

My eyes widened even more at this statement. So I did cut myself once when I was at the park. "Whoa...." I said before I could catch myself. "I-I mean...I...don't know..."

"Riley..."

"Yeah?"

"Can I come in?"

"Yeah...uh...hold on...." I said as I got up and shoved the pills back in the sack, I throw the knife in there too. I threw the bag underneath the bed and tore the bedspread off. I flipped it over and was really glad that the blood hadn't seeped through. Oh well, even if it started to, I'd just put the pillow there, like I had been laying there like that. I walked over and unlocked the door, ran back to th bed, jumping on it and laying on my stomach, supporting my head by my hand. "Come in!" I yelled.

The door opened and Ryan entered. "Riley..."

"Yeah?" I ask, the drugs must be starting to take effect because Ryan looks a little blurry and stuff, oh well.

"Riley are you ok?"

I wondered if maybe I had a look in my eyes that made him sound so worried. Yeah...why?"

"Where did the blood come from?"

"What blood?" I asked, trying my best to convince him that I didn't know what he was talking about.

"The blood on the wrist of your t-shirt."

"Oh...I'd climbed a tree and...there was a branch that I didn't see, it kinda...cut me."

"Oh...ok. Well, you know, if you ever need to talk, you've got a housefull of people you can talk to, right?"

I nodded really losely, grinning. "Yeah...I know." I said with an odd, extremely happy sounding tone.

I saw Ryan frown, "Are you sure your ok?"

I nod in the same way as before, still grinning and still having that tone in my voice, "Yeah...I'm fine. You don't have worry, Ryan." I pushed myself to my knees on the bed and stood, then jumped off the bed, landing somewhat lightly. I talked over to stand in front of Ryan, "Why'd ya worry abou me all tha' time, Ry? I mean...i's useless, ain't it?"

"Because your my friend...I don't want you to get hurt."

"I'm not gonna ge' hurt, Ry..." I didn't but I'm sure that Ryan noticed that my words were starting to slur a little bit.

He took me by the shoulders, "Riley?"

He sounded so far away...it was strange, because I knew that he was right there but he sounded so far. I didn't answer him. I just smiled.

"Riley?" He still sounded far but now he also sounded worried.

I still didn't answer, I just continued to stand there, head tilted to the side, smiling.

"Riley..." He sounded really far away now. I can't figure out why but...he does. He sounded really concerned too. But I can't figure out why. I'm fine, really, I am. Am I thinking that? Or did I say it? I think I said it...but he didn't seem to hear me, or maybe I really did only think it. I don't know. I tired to speak but, my mouth didn't want to coorperate, it just moved with no sound. I knew I wasn't saying anything. I don't know how I knew, but I knew my mouth was just opening and closing like a fish. "Riley...are you ok?" Ryan's words were rushed. When I didn't answer, "Riley...Riley tell you me your ok. Tell me. Are you ok?" I still couldn't speak but I nodded anyway. "No...No, Riley, tell me that your ok. I want to hear you. I want to hear you say it." I tilted my head to the other side and looked at him, I must have had a very "Why" look on my face because he said, "Becuase...Riley...I need to hear you say it, say that your ok. I need to make sure...Why are you like this?"

I look at him for a moment and for the first time in the last few minutes, I actually manage to speak, "I...I think...it-it's the...the...." Before I can finish the sentence all I see is darkness. It's strange because it's not a complete darkness, because there is sill light and I can still see Ryan, but it is a certain kind of darkness. Before I can do anything else, the light starts to fade, Ryan started to fade, and darkness was starting to surround me. The next thing I knew, the darkness was all around me, letting no light in at all, and Ryan was gone, though I could still hear him calling out.

"Riley...Riley, can you hear me."

Of course I can hear you...I'm just not so sure that you can hear me. I try to say so, but it doesn't work. I don't even think my mouth is moving, so...he probably doesn't even know I'm trying to speak at all. I guess that saying is true, you know, that one that goes, "Life sucks and then you die.", yeah, that one. I'm really starting to believe that one's true. No, it's not like I'm dying or anything, it's just...it seems right for some reason or another, though I'm not really sure why it makes so much sense at the moment, but it does. Hopefully I didn't confuse you, I confuse my self sometimes, I don't think I should have confused you, but maybe I did--I think I almost started confusing myself there for a minute.

Ryan wasn't sure what to do, Riley had been talking and then...all the sudden she was passed out, falling limp against him. He shook his head. He picked her up and lay her on the bed. He had to call someone, Kirsten, Sandy, no, no...hospital, he should call the hospital...right? Yes. The hospital.

~*~*~

She was rushed to the Emergency Room. Ryan was in the waiting room. He had already called Kirsten; She said she would be there as soon as possible and she would call Sandy. It was only a few minutes after he had sat down that the pair came running in. "Is she ok?" Kirsten asked, to which Ryan shrugged. "What?"

"I don't know...they haven't said anything, but it has only been a few minutes and--" He was cut off by one of the nurses coming in the waiting room, "Is there a Ryan Atwood here?"

Ryan looked up, "That's me."

"Come with me." She looked at Sandy and Kirsten, "Are they your parents?"

Ryan glanced at the couple, "Yeah...they are."

"Then they need to come as well." She turned and started to walk briskly down the hall. The three followed her outside the room that Riley was evidentally in. "Now, do you know what caused her to pass out?" Ryan shook his head, "Were your mother and father there at the time." He shook his head again. "Ok. Well, I'm not sure what it was but...she overdosed on something. We're still trying to figure out what." She glanced up from her clipboard. "Don't worry, it's nothing fatal...but nearly. She'll be in here for a few days. Do you know of anything she may have been taking for pain or anything" Neither of the three that stood before her knew of anything and tol dher so. "Well, ff you could maybe talk to her, find out what she was taking...it would help tons." She paused and looked at the, in her eyes, family. "Well...you can go in now. See you can talk to your girlfriend, ok, hun?" She said to Ryan.

"Oh, she's just a close friend, actually." He corrected her.

"Oh...well, nevertheless, talk to her, ok?"

Ryan nodded and followed Sandy and Kirsten into the room. It was pretty bright, considering the lights were on and almost the entire room was white. It was strange for Ryan, seeing Riley laying there in the hospital bed. The trio assumed she was asleep and they were a bit shocked when she spoke. "Ryan..." I had barely managed to mutter, but I did.

"Riley...I--"

I had my hand raised, making a motion to tell him to stop, then to come here.

It was only then, as he stood next to the bed, that Ryan saw the slits on her wrists. "Riley..."

"No. Before I change my mind...there's a bag...under the bed...it has the knife...and the pills in it."

"What were you taking?"

I shook my head, "I don't remember...I picked it up from a store....it was a random thing...I wanna say it was sleeping pills but I know that isn't right. I want you to go back to the house...get the bag...and figure out what the pills were...tell Sarah...that...that was the nurse you were talking to...tell her...and...."

"Riley, really, you should rest." Kirsten said, obviously worried.

I nodded. "Yeah...I'll be fine...as long as you go get the pills...and bring them back...and give them to Sarah McKinsley. That's her name...give them to her...okay...Ry?"

Ryan nodded. "Alright...I'll do that...as long as you promise me two things. One: rest...the other...please, never do this again..."

I nodded again. "Kay...go..." I couldn't speak any more. It hurt too much. I watched as he left....and Sandy too. Kirsten didn't leave though. She stayed. I didn't know why, but she stayed with me until Ryan came back with Sarah. That seemed really quick. The hospital was farther than that, wasn't it? I don't know. My time perception isn't great right now. I'm starting to wonder if they are going to kick me out--or make me go to rehab. Maybe they'll make me go to rehab then kick me out. That would suck. It would suck to get kicked out at all but it would really suck to go through rehab for five months, or however long it lasted, then get kicked out. That would suck much monkey butt.

~*~*~

It was a few weeks later, and I was still in the Cohen house. I didn't have to do any rehab, but boy did they watch me like a flock of hawks. Seth had gone as far as to just watching me, he had hardly spoke to me in three weeks. This was getting absurd. "Seth Nicholas Cohen! Get your ass in here!" I yelled. He was almost immediately downstairs in the living room. "Why have you been ignoring me for the past three weeks?" He didn't answer but his eyes had gotten noticably wider. "Answer me, Seth!"

He swallowed, "Well, uh...I don't know...I just...I haven't found a...reason to...or a topic to bring up with you?"

"Yeah...right...that's believable. Ha! Fat chance! Wrong answer, buddy!"

"No...Riley, really...I haven't--"

"Ryan, hey." I cut Seth off and ignored him as the sandy blonde haired boy came in.

"Hey Riley. What's up?"

"Oh...nothing much...just givin' Seth here a hard time about pretty much avoidin' me for three weeks."

"Why? He hardly talked to you before...why does it matter?"

I shrugged, "I don't know...it was just kind of fun to play with him like that." Ryan closed his eyes and shook his head; Seth smacked his forehead. I pointed at the pair, "You two made that one dirty, I had nothing to do with it this time."

We looked at each other and laughed. Everything was back to normal. It was only about ten minutes later and Seth and I were playing a fighting game. It was half-game console, half-verbal arguing. Seth was yelling at me, or my character more less, and I was yelling right back. In the end, I kicked Seth's ass and got the high score. "Man, this sucks...You can't let this get out, Ryan. You can't tell anyone that I got beaten at Tekken by a girl."

"Cool...he gets warned, I don't. I'm gonna go tell Summer!" I stood up and ran off. Before exiting the room, however, I stopped and looked at Seth, "Oh, by the way, you have a new single-player high score to beat. Five thousand, eight hundred and seventy-three. Beat that, bud!" I laughed as he ran after her. I ran outside to the pool and in the end, it was a good thing it was so warm out today because Seth had shoved me in playfully. He did, however, get pulled in moments afterward. Ryan had followed us out and watched out antics. Stupidly enough, he stood a bit too close to the pool. Seth and I looked at each other and nodded, going over to where he was. Each of us grabbed on to one of his legs.

"Don't you even dare."

"Oh but we must." We, the "devilish duo", chorused. And with that, we pulled him in. Ryan immediately dunked me under water and not long after, he dunked Seth as well. Once we were all above water, the three of us laughed.

"We should get out, dry off, and do this again...only this time...Summer and Marissa should be here." Riley grinned mischieviously, and Seth and Ryan seemed to agree already.

~*~*~*~

A/N - Ok, that's the end of that one. I had thought about making this a chaptered fic but...it ended up being a long one-shot. Funny how things work out like that, huh? lol. Anyway...I kind of rushed the ending I guess, huh? Maybe that's just my opinion, I don't know. But I really loved the way I ended it *grin* It was fun. Anyway...Review me, e-mail me, IM me...whatever!

Later days, ~PFB