AN: Aerle, here you go. Your super-weird ShakkyHina fic. It's probably even crackier than the ship. Really. But I hope that it makes you ship them anyway :P

GUYS PLEASE DON'T TAKE THIS SERIOUSLY! I make fun out of feminism, views on feminism, men, women and basically everything.

IT'S CRACK

Disclaimer: OP belongs to Oda.

Please enjoy. And feel free to review and criticize if you want to. Have fun~

PS: I know that it's terrible :D


Hina was pissed. Very pissed. What the hell did Smoker think as he said these words? A break? Really? They didn't need a fucking break! There is no way a 'break' would change something! They didn't see each other regularly in the first place! He went to the New World after all! To join the G-5 of all things! Fool!
The pink-haired woman stamped from one groove to another, fuming. She needed to calm down and running around the Sabaody Archipelago and beating up pirates seemed as the best way to let out the steam.

Especially as her subordinates, these idiots Jango and Fullbody, weren't able to pester her and had to turn in the defeated villains instead.

The marine stopped in tracks. The scene in front of her was just too grotesque. A single lady, a tall black-haired woman, just threw out a bunch of pirates out of the old building carrying the shield "Shakky's Rip-off Bar" as if it was an absolutely normal thing.

Thinking about it, Hina remembered hearing something about a legendary pirate called "Shakky", who had been chased by Garp himself in the past, being at home at the Sabaody Archipelago. Maybe the woman working at the bar carrying his name would know something about it.

Following this logic, Hina decided to enter the establishment at Groove 13.

Just before she reached the door, it opened and an old man walked out. She recognized him. It was Gol D. Roger's Vice, Silvers Rayleigh, the Dark King. His presence was overwhelming and the pink-haired marine froze as he passed her. She had heard thousands of stories about the man, but they all described him as the laid-back type who showed his true colours only in combat, if ever.

Did that mean he was going to attack her? Than it struck her, he was angry. The man was angry because of something that happened inside of the bar.

The lady...

Hina hurried to the door, opening it with one swift movement.

To her surprise, the bar's interior was still intact and everything seemed to be in place. The tall woman was standing behind the counter and seemed unharmed as well.

She shot the marine a doubtful look, but didn't say anything.

"Is everything alright ma'am? Hina is worried, as she just saw that Silvers Rayleigh, a notorious pirate, left this place just moments ago." the pink-haired woman asked.

"So why aren't you chasing him when you recognized him?" the tall woman asked, sounding almost bored.

Hina didn't reply to that and sat down at the bar instead. " Hina wants booze."

"That would be 100.000 Berry." the woman replied as she placed the glass in front of her guest.

"Are you serious? Don't try to fool Hina." the marine glared at the woman in front of her, who started laughing.

"I was completely serious. Didn't you read the shield, Captain?" the raven asked.

"Is Shakuyaku here?" the younger of the women replied instead of answering the question.

"She is standing in front of you." the bartender replied with a challenging grin.

Hearing that words, Hina's mouth fell open. She had heard that there were a few famous female pirates from before the Great Age of Pirates started, but everything the older marines mentioned about Shakuyaku was said with such respect, that all the younger ones believed it had been a man who could have fought with Roger or Shikki if he hadn't quit 40 years ago.

"Don't be so surprised and drink up." Shakky spoke as she lit up a cigarette.

"Why did you quit?" Hina couldn't help but question. She simply felt like talking, talking with another woman. It didn't matter that the other had been a notorious pirate in the past. Not now at least.

"Personal reasons." the bartender replied as she took a drag from her cancer stick. "Let's put it this way: men are pigs. That's all."

"Your crew?" Hina asked, studying the woman in front of her. The question earned her a snort.

"Don't be ridiculous. There aren't more loyal people than pirates. At least if we are talking about crews. No, it was the thing called love. I quit to settle down." Shakky admitted, a sad smile playing on her lips.

"Who was the man?" the marine pried more and more, as the woman's story was so different from what she had expected. So human.

"It doesn't matter. We broke up soon after, but I didn't see a reason to go back to the sea at that point. Starting there, men came and went with the years..." Shakky sighed, pouring herself a glass of booze as well.

"Hina is sorry." the pink-haired woman whispered. All the recent memories from the break-up with Smoker came back as she heard Shakky's words.

"So who left you?" the bartender asked, not giving a damn about how miserable the marine looked.

"Nobody!" the other answered impulsively, glaring at the taller woman.

"I heard about you, Black Cage Hina." Shakky continued. "You are famous for being a strong-willed young marine captain, who stands for herself. But today, you don't seem to have the strength to keep up that face."

"Hina broke up." the pink-haired woman admitted after a while.

"So men again. As expected." Shakky sighed and walked around to sit down next to the other.

"How about we pay them back?" she asked with a mischievous glint in her eyes.

"You can't be serious." Hina jumped up from her chair, knocking her glass over in the process. "Hina is a marine!"
"I know. But that doesn't change the fact that Hina is also a woman who was stood up by a man." Shakky commented.


"H-Hina can't!" With these words, the young marine stormed out of the building and left the still grinning bartender alone.

It didn't take long and Hina found herself in front of the bar once again.

This time, she didn't end up at the place by chance but went there on her own behalf. She wanted to talk to Shakky once again and take the offer.

Smoker hadn't called since their break-up and her subordinates, fueled by the fact that she was single again, annoyed the hell out of her by now.

Hina had been thinking about how to deal with these things in the past few days, but she didn't manage to come up with anything besides going back to the bar. After all, there wasn't a person better at kicking man's asses than Shakuyaku, the famous pirate who wasn't caught even by Garp himself.

"Hi." Shakky greeted without looking up from her newspaper.

The marine didn't reply to that and sat down on the place she occupied last time.

"So, did you change your mind?" the older woman asked after she finally put the newspaper aside.


"Hina did." the reply was short, but made both women grin.

Day after day, the two women met up to plan their strategy.

At some point, it even changed from paying it back to the men who betrayed them to fuck with the whole male-dominated word. It was so weird, that Shakky even started joking about them becoming some of these "hairy, lesbian feminists" that the World-government hated so much. The ex-pirate had hated these clichees about the people who dared to oppose since forever, but there was no way to change them so she stuck with making fun of the close-minded people. After all, the things she was planning to do could not be compared with feminism. They did it only for the fun, not to change the word.

She joked about it till the day Hina leaned over the bar and kissed her.

To say that Shakky was shocked would be an understatement, but the older woman didn't hesitate and took the chance. Was there a better way to get over men than to fall in love with a woman? No, there wasn't. Especially not, as Silvers stepped inside the bar in the exactly same moment it happened.

His expression was priceless. Shakky hadn't seen him shocked before or ever after. She didn't get to call him out on that as he left before she could open her mouth. And it simply wasn't worth it to run after him.

"Well..." the bartender lit up a cigarette instead, grinning at the younger woman.

"Hina is happy." the marine announced as if nothing had happened and both woman continued their work.

By now, they even had a more or less working plan, which involved manipulating the Marine HQ's Denden-mushi system and calling out the bullshit that was happening to women all around the world. It was a very stupid idea and both women were fully aware of that, but the fun it promised was way too much.

Sure, Hina struggled a lot because of her status as a marine and the absolute justice, but after Shakky pointed out to her all the bad things happening around them, the younger woman finally agreed and decide to participate. She took the whole thing way more seriously than Shakky though, as the ex-pirate did it mostly for the giggles while Hina really wanted to change something.

But the motivation didn't matter. They did it. They did it, and they did it together. That was the most important part.

To their surprise, the broadcast was a huge success and a lot of women decided to participate in their 'revolution'.

It was simple: overthrowing all the shitty clothes-policies and dressing the way they wanted gave the women an overwhelming freedom. Seeing a marine and a famous pirate to do so, to throw away their shirts on the super-warm Sabaody Archipelago, inspired them to do the same.

Why should men be allowed to run around without shirts and women shouldn't? There isn't a reason.

That's why Hina and Shakky decided to bring the women of all islands to the same conclusion and punched everybody who tried to stop them into the face.

Even Smoker, who happened to be looking for Hina at that time got a blue eye and the pink-haired marine was more than pleased with herself.

She got her revenge, a new lover and caused chaos in the world, fighting for her own justice instead of for what some old men told her to.

But once again, after the uproar ended and there was nothing more to do, both Shakky and Hina grew bored. Sure, they understood each other perfectly, but it wasn't perfect and both knew that it wouldn't last. After all, a marine and an ex-pirate had way too different views on life.

So one day, they decided to let it end, but promised each other to meet up every time somebody was stupid enough to try to hurt one of them. In such a case, the world would have to look forward to another round of pure madness, caused by two pissed off badass ladies.