Down It
After a long tiring day at work Morse, Thursday and Jakes burst into the Horse and Hound, gasping for a drink. The three perch on some free bar stools and order their usual. Morse and Thursday go to take their first much needed sip of their larger when they are stopped by Jakes
"Hang on a sec, why don't we make this friendly drink a little more exciting?"
"How d'ya mean" Thursday asks
"Well you know, let's be inventive. How about a down it contest"
"A what?!" Thursday exclaims
"Haven't you ever heard of down it contests sir?"
"I'm afraid you'll have to enlighten me Jakes"
"Well it's whoever can down a pint without breath"
"That's blooming ridiculous!"
"The lads certainly enjoy it"
"Well sorry Sargent, you can count me out on this one"
"Shame. I reckon you would've been some tough competition for me sir"
"Nah, it's for you youngsters"

Jakes nods at Morse on the far stool who right now is in a world of his own
"Morse?" Morse gives a sharp 180 degree turn of his head
"hm?" Jakes lets out a frustrated sigh
"Whoever can down their drink without breath wins a pint bought by the loser" he repeats reluctantly
Morse doesn't look too keen but knows Jakes will irritate him about it for weeks after if he doesn't do it so he clears his throat and says
"Ok, you're on" Jakes orders two pint glasses of whiskey which is handed to each bloke. Jakes who now has a mischievous grin on his face says
"Ok ladies first" but Morse isn't giving in to Jakes's ridiculous comment replies
"Oh no please, you first I insist"
"Alright then. I suppose I need to show you how it's done" so he grasps his glass and heads for the huge swig but he couldn't handle it as he has to take a breath before finishing the last quarter of the pint.
"Good try" Morse remarks
"I'd like to see you do any better" Jakes sneers.

The pressure is really on now as Morse would hate to fail and look a fool in front of Jakes, especially as he had just jeered at him for messing up. Morse grabs his glass and glides it towards his mouth, a cold sweat across his forehead. He can't stand this tension so just keeps gulping and gulping until before he knows it the pint has disappeared.

Jakes is gobsmacked, he sits there with his mouth so wide open he could catch a fly in there. Morse is dead chuffed, he can't stop smiling.
"I think that's another pint for me then don't you?"
"Alright, you've made your point" a very sulky Jakes scowls as he slumps off of his stool to order Morse's victory drink. And while he is out the way Thursday and Morse have a right old chuckle as that's one way to get back at someone who let's face it is a little too full of themselves.
-The End