A/N: okay so this originally started out as an idea for a oneshot , but I wouldn't mind continuing and spinning it into a longer story ? let me know what you guys think in the comments or something. thanks very much , and happy reading ! xx
"Are we live? Is this thing on? Okay you can start now let's go-"
Nicky toggles the camera a little, and steps back to stand next to Morello, who smiles dazzlingly at the camera.
"Good afternoon. I'm Lorna Muccio," She begins.
"Uh, you should probably introduce yourself as Lorna Morello, not Muccio. Nobody will know who the fuck Muccio is if I call you that in the video, since people are used to you as Morello," Nicky interrupts. Morello's brilliant smile slips.
"But Muccio is my name now!" She protests. "Do you want me to call you Muccio, huh Muccio?" Nicky snaps. Morello pauses.
"Okay, that does sound a little weird when you say it. Why are we going by surnames anyway? You and I are friends," she says.
"We're supposed to go by surnames. You mentioned that in the first episode," Nicky reminds her.
Morello sighs. "Alright fine, let's start again." She composes herself, and the winning smile is back once more.
"Hello, everyone. I'm Lorna Morello, or Lorna Muccio, since y'know, I'm married," Morello says. Nicky's eye twitches a little at the last part.
"And you can call me Nicky," she says. Morello's mouth drops open. "You get to go by a nickname, but I gotta follow the rules?" She demands.
"I'm the fucked up junkie rebel. You're the cute little good girl who's a little bit crazy," Nicky points out. "That's not fair. That's fucking bullshit." Morello glares at her companion.
"Besides, I have a nickname. People know me by that nickname. It's a nickname that applies to my last name," Nicky says.
"I followed the rules, and now you gotta too, Nichols. You tell them your full fucking name," Morello growls.
"Fine, and then we can move on." Nicky sighs and pushes back her blonde curls. "I'm Nicole Nichols-" Morello bursts into a fit of giggles- "but you can call me Nicky." She glares at Morello, who hastily composes herself.
"And today, the two of us are going to be recording this video for all of the fans of our show," Morello says.
"You do remember this is live, and that that whole conversation we had is being broadcasted to the world now, right?" Nicky asks. Morello wilts a little.
"Oh, crap," she says. "I hope no one saw that," she mumbles. "Should we just get back to the point?" Nicky asks, clearly trying to lessen her friend's embarassment. Morello nods gratefully.
"Okay, so." Nicky clears her throat. "First off, I gotta apologise because we're filming this in the bathroom. It smells like shit in here, but it's the only place we can film. I borrowed Vause's phone to stream this, and Chapman's standing guard outside, and if she yells something like 'oh, my stomach', then we gotta go. Just getting that out of the way," she says, subconsciously tugging at her shirt.
"So anyway, we're here because on our contraband phone, we got an app called Tumblr," Morello continues, twirling a lock of dark hair around her finger. "And we found like, this whole entire fandom about us. We have like fanpages, too. We're a 'ship', apparently. That means people are fans of our relationship," she adds, her eyes lighting up eagerly.
Nicky laughs. "That's right. We've got drawings, and stories, and playlists, and pages dedicated to us..." She says, checking off each item on her fingers. "And our 'ship name' is Nichorello, which is a combination of 'Nichols' and 'Morello'. Cute." She grins and nudges Morello, who turns beet red.
"Yeah, and all our fans are great, but don't forget, I still got a husband," Morello says quickly.
"Oh yeah, we were gonna talk about that," Nicky adds, pulling out the aforementioned phone. "Wow, everyone seems to hate him a lot. In a lot of fanfiction, people split Morello and him up all the time, and pair the two of us up," she says cheerfully, scrolling down the screen.
Morello turns a little redder. "But there are some where I stay with him, y'know. I love him," she says quickly, grabbing the phone from Nicky.
"Yeah, and I suffer a lot when you don't." Nicky's smile slips a little, just barely.
"Yeah but, you're actually all good. Both of us are actually better off as friends, right Nichols?" Morello forces a bright grin onto her face, and squeezes Nicky's hand. Her eye twitches visibly, but she allows Morello to take her hand for a moment.
"Yeah, sure. Anyway, lots of people are wondering why Morello married whoever-the-fuck-he-was while I was away at max." On the surface, Nicky appears calm, but her hands are fidgeting in her lap.
"His name's Vincent." Morello nudges her reproachfully.
"And I married him, because I fell in love with him. I was so lonely, and I only started talkin' to him for his money, to be honest. But he managed to move past that, and actually got to know me, as a person, and not just as a prison inmate. And he loves me, even though I've done bad things." Morello smiles and plays with the wedding ring on her finger, while Nicky just stares into the camera like she is on The Office.
"And he's my soulmate, and when I get out he and I are gonna make lots of cute little Italian babies together," Morello says happily.
"I thought you didn't like kids. You and I were trash-talking them on that one episode, remember?" Nicky sighs, leaning back in her seat and feigning boredom. Her brown eyes dart around without much interest, looking anywhere but the camera.
"Yes, but things are different now. I'm married," Morello says. "Jesus, we get it. Next thing you know people are gonna start a drinking game where they take shots whenever you talk about your husband." Nicky rolls her eyes. "So, you two know everything about each other? Because some of our viewers seem to doubt that," she says, plucking the phone from Morello's lap.
"Of course I do! Go on, ask me anything about him," Morello says defiantly, tossing back her dark hair. "Okay then. What's his favourite colour?" Nicky asks. Morello opens her mouth, then closes it again.
"Favourite movie?" Nicky continues, before Morello can respond to the first question.
"Favourite song? Birthday? Hobbies? Any siblings?" Nicky fires questions at her rapidly.
"Hey, wait a minute. I know some of these!" Morello protests, grabbing Nicky's arm. "Uh, his interests involve Australian jiujitsu, and he's got siblings. I know, 'cause he had to help his brother with his homework," she says proudly.
"And the rest?" Nicky asks. Morello turns pink and looks down at her lap silently.
"And you call him while he's with his brother? What, does he still live with his mom or something?" Nicky chuckles. "It's a better financial choice, for our future together when I get out!" Morello protests.
"Oh my God, he does live with his mother!" Nicky laughs derisively. "He's what, 35 and married? And he doesn't have his own place?" She snickers loudly.
"You're like, 30, but you don't have your own place either!" Morello retaliates angirly.
"I'm too busy fucking my own life up and pissing my mom off. Besides, I'm not even 30 yet." Nicky grins crookedly.
"But I'm 30, and I don't got my own place!" Morello adds defensively. "You're different. You're not married, for one thing, and you're not too well off, and you don't have a job. He's, well, married and working, and lives with his mom," Nicky says.
"So what, I'm special just 'cause I'm poor?" Morello questions. "No, you're special, because you're not like him, or me, or any of us. You're different," Nicky replies, and she seems to regret her words instantly.
"Okay, I'm curious. Different, how, exactly?" Morello says, the anger melting out of her brown eyes, replaced with curiousity.
Nicky opens her mouth and closes it again. She pushes her hair back. "No, I'm not answering that," she laughs harshly.
"No, c'mon, tell me. I bet they wanna know too." Morello gestures at the camera.
"You— I— look, you see the world differently from us. You got some weird perspective on everything, thinking there's good when there isn't," she says. "Is that a good thing?" Morello asks skeptically.
"Yes, it is. It's one of the few good things in this hellhole," Nicky replies. Morello blushes.
"Besides, you're pretty fucked up too. Not the same way as me, but still. You wouldn't last a day on your own," Nicky backtracks quickly.
There is an awkward silence for a bit.
"So what's your favourite colour, then? I know pretty much nothing about you too," Morello says. "You don't tell me anything about you, but you know everything about me," she adds.
"For one thing, you never ask. And you already know when my birthday is, since we celebrated it together that year," Nicky says. Morello smiles.
"Those were good days. Red always threw the best parties for you, since you're her special girl," She says. "Then after the parties, you and I always snuck off to the chapel and do things." Nicky winks at Morello.
"Y-yes, but before we started sleepin' together, we were best friends, too. So for your birthday I snuck the muffin from dinner out, and stuck a candle in it, remember? You laughed and made a wish, then you gave me half of it, and then you kissed my forehead." Morello smiles shyly and casts her gaze down at her lap.
Nicky kisses her cheek. "Don't need to be shy. Back then it was just you and me. And Christopher." She adds with a laugh.
"Don't talk about him." Morello shudders. "I never want to think about him again," she says, her tone suggesting that she's not happy that Nicky brought him up. Nicky could sense the hint in her voice too, because the smile on her face disappears, and her expression is closed off again, her eyes steely.
"You know, back then, Vause was always my best friend. Not you. You were a different sort of friend." Nicky looks away from the camera, her expression indifferent. Morello blinks at her, hurt and confused.
"Okay," she says quietly.
"Look, I didn't mean it like that, kid. You know I don't," Nicky says softly, clearly trying to apologise.
"It's fine, Nicky." Morello smiles a little crooked smile, not unlike the ones Nicky gives her. "And my favourite colour is black," Nicky adds.
Morello grins. "Of course it is," she says.
"And you already know my hobbies. Books, rock music, sex, drugs, and giving my mom a headache." Nicky counts each item off her fingers.
"Okay, but what were you like before all this? You never actually said anything, besides telling us all about what your mom was like," Morello presses her.
"That's a story for another time, kid." Nicky deflects the question expertly. "Dammit, Nichols," Morello curses at her angrily. "We have to finish the video, but we keep going off-topic," Nicky points out.
"Oh, yeah. But don't think we won't get back to this." Morello glowers at her threateningly. Her threatening looks are even less frightening than a kitten's, so Nicky just rolls her eyes and changes the subject.
"Okay, one thing I gotta say. What the fuck is up with spelling my name wrong? No one spells Chapman's name wrong, or Vause's, or Red's, or even Morello's, for that matter," Nicky rants, while Morello stifles her laughter.
"It's N-I-C-K-Y, not N-I-K-K-I or N-I-C-K-I or however the fuck else you spell my name. Jesus." Nicky sighs in irritation, but she looks lighter, as though she's finally managed to get that off her chest after a while.
"I bet Washington would agree if she were still here, RIP," she adds. "People spell her name wrong all the time too." She rolls her eyes and tugs at her shirt absently. "Spelled," she corrects herself softly.
A moment of silence passes.
"Anything to add before we move on, Morello?" Nicky asks her companion, who had been giggling into her hands until she brought up Washington. That sobered her up.
"No, just wanna tell all of you to learn how to spell our names properly, okay? It pisses Nicky off real bad, and she's not the only one. I hear Flaca and Taystee complaining about it too sometimes," Morello says, smiling at the camera.
"Next, we're gonna talk about fanfiction tropes," Nicky announces.
"Oh, I love reading all the fanfiction! But there aren't any ones with me and Vinnie that don't involve Nicky being unhappy, so I usually get real sad after I read them." Morello bites her lip uncomfortably.
"Now, I'm not sayin' you can't pair me and Nichols together, but I'd like to see stories with me and Vinnie too." She gazes wistfully into the distance.
"I, for one, love all the fanfiction. Even though some of you get some things wrong. I don't have a 'soft side'. What you see is what you get." Nicky's blondish-brown hair falls into her eyes, and she brushes it away with careful, deliberately arrogant movements.
"Don't listen to her. She's got a soft side she only lets Red see," Morello whispers loudly.
"But people seem to think that you're the only person I show my supposed gentle side to." Nicky scoffs.
"Well you can be pretty soft with me. Remember when Christopher came to visit?" Morello says softly. Nicky looks away.
"That was cause you were upset. You're my family, and no one fucks with my family," Nicky says. "Thank you, Nicky." Morello smiles warmly at her, before turning back to the camera. "Alright then, we cleared that up. Time to move on," she announces cheerily.
"Some people like to say I've never been in love with other people before Morello, or that she drew me in instantly. Yeah, I admit, I thought I loved her for a while here, and I thought she loved me too. But she clearly didn't, so I moved on," Nicky clarifies, while Morello casts her gaze to the floor, clearly uncomfortable.
"So anyway, none of that is true. When I first saw her, I thought she was pretty hot, which is why I bothered talking to her. But it was later on that I realised I actually liked her. So we're friends now," Nicky says.
"You know, I did have feelings for you at some point, too. It was just too late by then," Morello says softly. They settle into silence again.
"And I've liked plenty of girls. Some of them were tall, some short, some black, some blonde, some Latina, and so forth. You get it. It drove my mother up the wall, since she wasn't a fan of me being a dyke, but she couldn't say shit about it." Nicky grins triumphantly.
"And I had lots of boys too. Don't think just because I was in love with Christopher that he was my one and only before Vinnie!" Morello adds enthusiastically.
"Yeah, so we just wanted to clear things up. Didn't want to seem too harsh, so apologies if I offended anyone," Nicky says.
"However, there are a few things about fanfiction that I love in particular." Morello's eyes sparkle. "I like that everyone knows I love gettin' dolled up and lookin' pretty, and that my family is always pretty fucked up." She laughs.
"And another thing I like is how everyone thinks my hair is real messy, and that I'm always written smoking or drinking, or fucking. That's real spot on," Nicky adds.
"And I also wanted to talk about how I love the fan art. It's amazing!" Morello says excitedly. "But there's so little. It's mostly just Vauseman, also known as Chapman and Vause," she announces, in a manner that suggests that she's proud of herself for knowing this.
"Some people think I draw Morello a lot. Which is true, I did, but not so much anymore. Don't really like drawing anymore, ever since I came back up the hill. Been kinda focused on trying to stay clean." Nicky shrugs nonchalantly.
"And one other question everyone asks, what happened to the board I wanted to give Morello for Christmas?" Ignoring Morello's confused expression, Nicky ploughs on. "I threw it in the garbage, after I came back from fucking Vause," she says.
"You fucked Vause?" Morello asks in part horror, part astonishment.
"Yes. She was probably the best I ever had." Nicky looks as though all she wants to do is go back in time and sleep with Vause all over again. Morello looks as though all she wants to do is to go out of the bathroom and bash Vause's face in with a brick.
"You okay? You look kinda...scary," Nicky says slowly. "No, no, I'm good. What was the board about?" Morello forces a smile onto her face. Nicky looks embarassed.
"Uh, I had all these cutouts from magazines. Wedding related shit, and places, like San Francisco, uh, Bora Bora..."
"Bora," Morello pipes up. "There's only two Boras." Nicky shakes her head. "But anyway, in the middle, there was this bride and groom cutout as well, and uh..." She looks away. "What is it?" Morello presses.
"I-" Nicky begins, before a loud cry of "oh, I have such a bad stomach ache right now, oh my God," from Chapman interrupts her. Instantly, the two inmates jump to their feet.
"Shit, shit, shit." Nicky takes her notes and stuffs then down her shirt.
"Oh fuck, Nicky, I don't wanna go down to the SHU." Morello panicks and reaches for her phone, frantically shoving it into her bra.
"SHU's full, kid." Nicky grabs Vause's phone and stuffs it down her shirt.
"Dammit, dammit, dammit, fucking shit-"