Disclaimer: - I don't own Bleach. Kubo Tite owns Bleach. Yakitate!Japan belongs to Takashi Yashiguchi

----- Warning: This story is beyond stupid and reading may be hazardous to your health! I have a twisted sense of humour!-----

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The Birth of Yakitate!Bleach

Azuma Kazuma was a small boy. He had medium length brown hair, which was held back over his child like face with a hairband. Two thin strands of hair escaped the band and protruded forward like antennas. His large brown eyes were the envy of millions of anime characters around the globe. He was a baker by trade and a very good one at that. All because his hands were hot, literally. Having solar palms however didn't save him from death. In fact, it had hastened it. If only his rule had not been, "The first person I would feed my bread to when I create it is myself", he wouldn't be in this predicament.

You see, in his quest to create the perfect bread, a bread worthy to be called his Japan, he had succeeded. It was his last creation and was guaranteed to send him to heaven. That's how he found himself here, in Soul Society after eating his bread. This was supposedly the true heaven, the place where good souls go after they pass on. To make ends meet here, he had taken a job at a local bakery. However, baking his breads here had left his heart feeling hollow. He had created his Japan, a bread made by Japanese for the Japanese that the Japanese could proudly call there own. But no one will know. Furthermore, with his success he had no more goal in life, nor in death for that matter.

His baking prowess did not go unnoticed however, as the line of customers grew longer and his delectable breads became the talk of Soul Society. Still he was sad. Even with a pay rise from his now wealthy employer, he was not content. Something was missing from his existence. He looked up as he was working on the green filling in his mixing bowl. The dinging in the back ground from his ovens told him his baking was done. "Excuse me," a stern even voice called out to him.

By the door, he saw his boss, bowing before a man in a white kataginu over his black kimono and hakama. The most notable thing about this man however was his elaborate hair piece. It must have taken him a long time every morning to get it right. The sword at his hip reminded Azuma of his long, still alive friend, Suwabara Kai.

"How can I help you mister?" Azuma casually asked as he scratched his head, scrunching up his face in deep concentration wondering if he'd ever seen this man before.

"I am Kuchiki Byakuya, lord of the noble house of Kuchiki." Byakuya looked down on the young lad. "It seems of late your reputation as a bread artisan has spread throughout Seireitei. I am somewhat of a bread connoisseur so I have decided to come and investigate."

It clicked. He didn't know the man, but Byakuya definitely reminded him of someone, someone called Kuroyonagi Ryo. "I just finished baking some Japan, number 58, Melon Sushi pan! Wanna try some mister?"

The crowd gathered around the doorway watching the noble. Normally this was an employees only area but the chance to show off the new talent a crowd with a noble as a judge was too tempting an offer for the boss to refuse.

Byakuya didn't know what to make of the bread as Azuma took it out of the oven, smeared the green paste on it with his fingers. Then he took another crumblier looking bread from another oven and slapped it on top. Apprehensively he took the creation from the hands of the grinning child and raised it to his mouth. Sniffing in the warm aroma he was actually surprised by the pleasant mouth watering odour. It induced his salivatory glands to work overtime, but it was not something he would admit to anyone.

Taking a bite he was taken back by the fullness of the taste, the sweetness of the paste and the completeness of the bread. A feeling welled up inside him that he fought to control. He tried to resist, but he couldn't. It was not something he had ever faced before. His body acted on it's own. His body bent over backwards, his hands touching his feet. His stomach pushed forward grotesquely as he imitated a ball. A scream forced it's way out from his throat, a scream he couldn't contain, "MELLLLOOOOONNNN!!!!!!!!"

As he got back up, his bulging eyes and gaping mouth had used up his quotient of facial expressions for the next decade. Composing himself he realized, this boy is a menace. But his bread was too good. He wanted more but could not bear to embarrass himself like that in public ever again! He came up with a solution. It was good to be a noble sometimes. "This boy will be requisitioned to work in Seireitei."

The boss looked concussed. Byakuya had just stripped him of his golden goose. Knowing this Byakuya sought to ease the man's burdens. "Of course, you sir, will be properly compensated."

At a wave of his hands some Shinigami guards came in and escorted Azuma out. One came in carrying a chest of gold. Opening it, the bosses' (1) expression changed to that of pure joy, "Thank you so much Kuchiki-sama!"

As Byakuya walked outside, his curiosity got the better of him. "Tell me child, do you have any other good breads?"

"I have plenty and they're all delicious!" Azuma proudly announced.

Byakuya's mouth secretly began to water again. "Better than that last one?"

"You bet!" Azuma skipped along happily, "I have two breads that are my absolute best creations!"

"Two best?"

"Yeah! They're my ultimate creations!" Azuma exclaimed, happy he had met someone with such a culinary interest. "I call them Japan! Z and Japan! GT."

End

AN: I know, I know! This is a sad, sad crossover! But I think it's funny! )

AN2: Japan – Name of the country, as well as pan meaning bread. Pan is a pun in Japunese I guess.

(1) Question: In this instance is it boss' , bosses' or boss's or bosses?