Kyo: Just a 'lil something I wrote up a while ago.

Ai: We don't own Megaman, capcom does. And if you take that one bit as a reference to Mortal Kombat, then we don't own that either.

Ky: Who does own Mortal Kombat?

Kyo: Damned if I know.

Why Bass Never Wins

Bass had cornered Megaman, ripped off his buster arm and kicked him in the crotch numerous times. If playing this scenario, you would be thinking, "shitshitshitwhadooIdo?"

Bass stared down at his long-time foe and blasted his face to a pile of slag.

"Woohoo!" Bass cried, doing a happy dance, "Take THAT you self-righteous blue sack 'o crap!"

The jubilant warrior even went so far as to give Treble a hug.

Bass whistled happily and turned to the door, only to see Megaman standing there, buster already charging.

"WTF?!"

"You can't beat me Bass!"

"I can damn well try!"

Once again Bass beat the blue bomber into the proverbial dust. As before Megaman was standing at the door mere seconds after being pounded into oblivion.

"You can't beat me Bass!"

"Treble," Bass said, turning to his canine companion "Am I in any way drugged up, crazy, or drunk?"

Treble tapped the floor twice.

"I mean more than usual"

Treble shook his head before leaping at Megaman's throat, damn sick of him.

"You can't beat me Bass!"

"Oh shut the slagging hell up!!" Bass yelled, tackling the bomber, and breaking his spinal relay.

"There we go" Bass said, triumphantly. "Not dead so he can't come back, but still royally smoten"

"You still can't beat me Bass!"

"Double-You-Tee-Eff?"

Spoiling the confused robot's victory, Megaman spontaneously detonated.

"WHAT THE FATALITY WAS THAT!?!" Bass yelled, knowing what was next.

"You can't beat me Bass!"

Bass looked at Megaman, then at Treble.

"I freaking give up" Bass said, slumping to the ground

"Wuh~ I win?" Megaman asked, incredulous.

"No, I win," Bass said, turning to face his foe, "Multiple times in fact"

Megaman shrugged and ran through the second door, got his skidplate handed to him a couple times by Wily's Skull Warrior-thingy, before giving up and playing Megaman X

Bass scratched Treble behind the ears and said,

"Being an NPC sucks"

At that moment, a man in a black suit strode up to Bass and said, "Bass man! I've got great news!"

"Yeah? What is it?" Bass replied, still sitting on the floor.

"The sixth Battle Network game is being produced!"

"Ahh, Battle Network." Bass said fondly. "I like Battle Network. I'm always a secret boss, I'm taller, plus I get the swooshiness cloak! So where do I come into it?"

"Well, you're a secret boss, and you fight Megaman after breaking out of your own grave"

"My own grave… Huh"

"I got some bad news though too,"

"I'm listening,"

"This is the last Battle Network game they're making, and since you won't make an appearance in Megaman X or Zero…"

"I'm gonna be out of a job…"

"Exactly,"

"Fuck,"

And with that, Bass headed back to his trailer, script in hand.

"END!!!" Bass said, popping out of nowhere.

"GAH!" the author yelled, falling out of his chair backwards.

"Take me to your coffee!"

"NO! MY COFFEE!!"

"Do you want Battle Network 6 or not?" Bass threatened.

"That's extortion!"

"Big woo, I'm evil, I can get away with it"

~Real End~

Kyo: In case you can't tell, things are taking place in some wierd continuity with the games in some order. Not quite sure what that order is, but eh.

Ai: Lazy bastard.