Kyo: Takes place in the 'Joke' Megaman Classic universe. Also inhabited by the eternally reviving Megaman from "Why Bass Never Wins" *Shameless self Plug*

Ai: WE OWN NAAAH-ZING! NAAAAAAHHHHHHHHZING!!

Ky: Well we don't own megaman, but we do own Bass' creative curses. I think

Females and Coffee

Bass wandered down the hall, carrying his most likely ill-gotten cup of coffee, sipping quietly. Until a blond blur attached itself to his leg.

"How's my pwetty widdle Bass?" the thing said, before Bass could throw it off.

"Gah!!" Bass yelled, recognising what this thing was. "Get away from me you!! I have a restraining order !"

Bass dislodged Roll with a mighty kick and bolted in the opposite direction, trying to compose a plan, or even a plot.

"You can't escape me my darling!!" Roll said, running after him faster than a maid should be able to, 'bot or not.

Bass ran to the post office and jumped through a window, Roll close behind.

"Nowhere else to run, Darling!" Roll said, bass having run into a dead end.

"Fruiting hell!" Bass cursed, turning.

Roll rushed forward, lunging for the black 'bot, lips at the ready.

"Got yer' lips!!" Bass said, dashing forward, grabbing Roll's lips and throwing her in a crate and nailing the lid on before she could get out.

# Light Residence #

"Bass!" Megaman exclaimed, opening his door, "what are you doing here?"

"Delivery" He said, handing Megaman a pad, "You might wanna keep this thing locked up too"

"Why's that?" Megaman said, signing in the appropriate 74 & ½ places.

"Cos frankly, she scares me" Bass said, before turning and piss-bolting away.

# Wily Residence #

Bass picked up where he left off, wandering down a hallway with his most likely ill-gotten cup of coffee, sipping quietly.

"Ahh, precious coffee… "Bass said, taking another sip.

Turning around, Bass sighed and ducked into Tenguman's room, silencing its occupant with a swift kick to the face.

"Where are you my darling?" Roll said, strolling down the hall.

Bass waited a few minutes, and after making sure she was gone he crept out, and made his way quickly and quietly, to his room, which thankfully had a lock.

Bass got to his room just as Roll turned a corner, almost making Bass spill his coffee.

"I found you my darling!!"

"Damnit!!" Bass yelled, ducking into his room, and locking the door.

Bass looked under the door and saw, very clearly, Roll's behind. She was leaning against his door.

Bass cursed. Even when she fell asleep, opening the door would wake her. He sat on his bed, pondering his next move. He took a sip of his coffee to find that his mug was empty. Bass cursed again and looked around his room. Air vent. That works.

Bass climbed into the vent and crawled along, heading towards the kitchen. Landing quietly on the linoleum, he moved forward. He grabbed the coffee, the coffeepot, sugar, and the milk before diving back into the vent, hearing, "Hellooo my darling!!"

"Damnit again!!" Bass said, pushing his spoils deeper into the vent. With a flash of white light, Bass' trim turned green and he welded the grille back on his vent with the Wave Burner

"You lose this time!" Bass said, gleefully, heading back along the vent, with Roll staring fondly at the retreating warrior's posterior.

Bass set up his coffee station in his room and made himself another cup.

"I could stay here all day" Bass said, slurping his coffee

"So could I my darling!!" Roll called from the door.

"Triple Damnit!!"

~END~

Kyo: Ah, poor Bass.

Bass: I have coffee, I'm fine.

Ai: There isn't any doors in the Author Notes

Bass: Well, damn. Off I go then.