I'll Be The One Who Stays:
Rating: M
Pairing: Steve Rogers/Tony Stark [STony]
Notes: The first chapter is kind of sad but I promise it gets better and like 100% more sap in the second chapter.
Which will be uploaded within the next 2 weeks if not sooner.
Please R&R! It will be very welcomed :)
Chapter One:
Tony gazed sadly at the bottom of his glass, the scotch that had only moments before covered it lay settling in his stomach. His lips were chapped, his eyes blood shot. He looked like shit and felt like it too. The last time his head had hit a pillow was 72 hours ago. the last time it hit anything was 36. he felt like a spoon that had been caught head down in a disposal. he sighed as he tilted the bottle strainght up and let the last few drops fall on his tongue.
With his head buried in his arms he told himself that at least drunkenness was better than the whoring around that was his usual M.O. but he wasn't really convinced. the whoring around at least felt good while he was at it.
This just felt like slowly drowning himself.
Tony sighed and let the tears that he'd been trying so hard to hold back spill from his eyes. He let the bottle fall from his hand to the floor and barely spared it a glance when it shattered. his only thought on it was that he wouldn't be able to leave the bench till Dum-E or U cleaned it up.
Not that he planned to.
He laid his head down on the cool counter, and closed his eyes for what seemed to be only a moment. . .
Vv~v~v~v~v~v~v~vV
When Tony came-to he had a splitting headache that felt like someone had let War Machine tap-dance on his head, and then driven a German tank across his temples. Tony was distracted from his poetic descriptions of his headache by the sound of tinkling glass, and glanced over his shoulder. The sight that greeted him almost made him fall off his stool.
There across the lab was Steve Rogers, 'The' Captan America. He was armed with a broom and dust pan and was sweeping up the shards of broken glass and scapes of metal and paper and who knew what else that lay littered across the lab.
Tony's first though was to curse his Bots. But then he saw U's hand laying dismantled on the counter in front of him, and Dum-E laying on his side in a corner. His service light blinking sadly. Tony tried to get up and groaned, drawing Steve's attention.
"I see you're up." Was all the other man said.
"Wha-what are you doing here?" Tony asked, shaking his head and blinking in an attempt to clear his vision.
Steve answered without turning towards him. "I came in to see if you wanted any of the breakfast that Bruce made, and found your lab like this. I never could stand to see such a mess, my mother always made sure our house was spick and span. So I thought I'd lend you a hand. As all your little machines seemed to be out of order."
"You could've just left it, I have another bot... somewhere." Tony said frowning. At least he thought he did.
Steve finally turned around, and Tony stepped back even though Steve was all the way across the room. The intensity of Steve's stare took Tony by surprise. He could pracitcally see Steve's disapproval radiating off him."Why do you do this to yourself?" Steve asked in a quiet voice.
Tony's eyebrows scrunched in surprise. "What?"
"There are ways to deal with pain other than getting drunk, trashing your lab, and destorying all the hard work you've done."
At this Tony graced Steve with a glare of his own. "I'm currently trying to avoid the other way of dealing with pain. as it's the very thing that out me in this position! And my 'hard work'?" Tony made quotation marks in the air. "Ha! That's a good one! This isn't work. This is me fucking around! Because, apparently, that's all I'm good at!" Tony paused, a pained expression on his face.
"And really Mr. Goody Goody Captain Spangles, who are you to tell me how to deal with pain? what the hell do you know about it! You're a fucking super soldier! pain doesn't exist for you!" Tony snarled
Steve's expression shifted from exasperated to down right pissed off.
He responded in a voice dangerously hushed "Well Stark, I may not push away every good thing that has ever come my way, or let my anger ruin me. but don't you dare tell me I don't know pain." Steve put down the broom and walked towards the door. "When I woke up there was no familiar face. And I didn't wake up in any room I knew, I woke up in a fake recovery room in the wrong century, with everyone I'd ever cared about six feet under and every thing I knew a distant memory."
Steve breathed out and calmed himself before he turned to look at Tony one last time. "You're not alone Tony, what ever you tell yourself. There are people who are willing to stay with you. as long as you stop pushing them away." And with that Steve slid open the door to the lab and disappeared into the hallway.
"That's a lie." Tony said quietly to the closed door. There's no one that's willing to stay."
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Steve marched through Stark tower, straight to the gym. Grabbing a punching bag he quickly hung it up and laid into it. Not even bother to put gloves on he landed blow after blow.
Barely a minute later he kicked it into the opposite wall and grabbed a new one.
"Stubborn," He gave it a right-cross "Arrogant," A sharp rib jab "Selfish," a Left-hook. "Childish" strainght in the solar plex
"Lonely. . ." The final blow didn't connect.
Steve sighed as he let his fists fall to his sides and uncurl. Walking over to the gym fridge Tony had installed he grabbed a drink.
Sinking to the floor he gazed at the mirror that took up the north wall of the gym. His eyes were red. . .
Why was he crying for that bastard? Tony was an arrogant, selfish, alcoholic. . . broken, lonely, sad man.
Wiping his eyes he admitted silently to himself that it was because he cared. Unittentionally he had grown to care about
Tony Stark.
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Tony rose shakily from his stool. Tripping over his own feet Tony landed with his cheek pressed against the floor. He attemped to push himself up, but couldn't find the will to do so. He turning his head he noticed a broken frame lying beneath the desk.
Tony reached out a hand and pulled it to him.
Pepper's face smiled back at him from behind the cracked glass. Tony could feel hot tears start to prick his already water-logged eyes and he drew a raged breath. Closing his eyes he tried to force the tears back. But all he could think of was Pepper's face as she said good-bye.
"It's over Tony," She said, as she threw shirts and dresses into a plastic trash bag. "You don't want me. You want some, little whore to be your play thing."
Tony tried to sputter out that that was simply not true, but Pepper cut him off. "You don't Tony! You never wanted a steady relationship.
All you wanted was someone to share your bed, kiss your boo-boos and take care of your mess of a life for you, with nothing in return!" She slammed the closet doors shut. "I'm done with you Tony! And if you want me to resine as CEO too then fine!"
"Pepper, I don't want you to resine. I don't want you to-"
"No Tony! this is it. we're done! I can not going to keep doing this! I spent years watching you bring girl after girl home and then just kick her to the curb when you were done! I'm not letting you do that to me!"
Tony flinched as if hit, "But you're not like them I would never-."
"Tony." Pepper paused as if unsure. But after a moment she simply shook her head, "I'm sorry."
v~V~v
Tony thought he could still hear the click of her reciding heals echoing across the holographic tile. But it was just his heart beat.
...
At least there was some proof he had one.
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Steve had known why Tony had gone off the deep end, Pepper's departure had been neither quiet nor discreat. He'd even tried to think of a way to help Tony. But he'd never been good at this sort of thing. Matters of the heart had always been Bucky's area. Steve barely knew how to just talk to someone he fancied. So maybe Tony was right, he hadn't exaclty ever delt with a heartache like that before. He really didn't even know what to say.
Sighing Steve rose to his feet and headed back to the lab. He would apologize. And possibly try to get Tony to come up to the kitchen to fill his stomach with something other than scotch.
When Steve arrived the lab he was greatful the door still opened to him. He'd expected Tony to have already locked him out by now. But when he entered the lab he couldn't even see Tony at first.
Taking a step inside He saw Tony, sprawled out in a crumpled heap on the floor.
"Tony!" Steve shouted, rushing over in panic. "Tony are you oka-!"
Tony let out a groan as Steve turned him over. He was glad to see that the only injury was a bruised cheek and a few minor cuts from the glass that practically carpeted the floor. Pulling Tony to him Steve lifted the smaller man and carried him out of the lab and towards his bedroom.
When they got there Steve noted that the bedroom was also in a state of unadultered chaos. Glass and clothes lay strewned across every avalible surface, streaks of red stained the wall and Steve was momentarilly worried, till he saw the wine bottle laying on its side still quietly seeping into the carpet.
Steve sighed and decided to take Tony to his room instead.
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Tony felt himself being lifted by strong arms and held against a firm chest. The who ever they were they smelled familiar, like old cologne and machinery, and for an irrational moment Tony thought it was his father's arms he felt cradling him. But then the figure muttered something about 'Tony you stubborn arrogant bastard' and he knew it was Steve.
Tony felt himself being carried up a flight of stairs, and down several hallways until he was finally laid down on what he assumed must have been a bed but was as hard as a rock.
He groaned at the stiffness and heard a muttered 'sorry' before he was lifted again.
After a few moments of scuffling and he was set down a second time, and he hummed in appreciation, it was much softer now.
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Steve sat down on the Bed beside Tony. He waited patiently for the playboy's breathing to slow and his face to relax before he got up to get a glass of water and some ibueprofen for when Tony awoke.
Collecting the items from the bathroom Steve set them down gently on the bedside table before slipping quietly out into the hallway.
"Jarvis?" He asked the air.
"Yes Captain?"
"Would you please notifiy me if Tony appears to be waking up or showing any sings of distress?"
"My pleasure Captain Rogers." Steve nodded akwardly to the empty hallway. He would never get used to speaking to Tony's A.I.
Vv~v~v~v~v~v~v~vV
For the next 19 hours Tony barely moved.
Steve spent most of that time watching over him, only leaving to eat and use the lavatory. Once or twice Bruce, Clint, or Natasha would peek their heads in and whisper to Steve for updates. But for the most part it was just him and Tony.
After a while Steve got bored of the novel he'd been reading (some book called 'Twilight' that Clint had recommended, it was awful.) and took out his sketchbook. He did a couple sketches of Tony while he was trying to formulate how he was going to apologize when Tony finally awoke.
Around 11 pm Steve looked down at his sketches, sighing at how peaceful Tony's face was while he slept. If only that peace could carry over into his waking moments.
Steve borrowed a couple of spare blankets from Natasha who never used her's anyway (something about blankets being to constricting in a crisis) and got himself together a make-shift bed on the floor next to his. He started to sketch Tony one last time before his eyes started closing and the fatigue finally claimed him.
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When Tony awoke the first thing he noticed was that he was in neither his bed or the lab. The second thing he noticed was that a light snoring was coming from somewhere on his right.
Rolling over he glanced down and was surprised to see Steve sleeping on the floor beside the bed. Well that solved the mystery of where he was.
Tony saw the pills and water on the bedside table and immediately took them. As he swallowed he let his eyes wander over Steve sleeping peacefully, a pad of paper lying beside him and a pencil still clutched in his hand.
Tony could see a half finished drawing of himself on the current page. And he would've been creeped out if not for the fact it was really good. Tony had never seen a sketch of himself like that. He looked . . . peaceful.
Reaching out a tentitive hand he lightly traced the charcoal lines with his finger, Steve had even managed to get his eyes right. Most sketches he'd seen didn't even come close to this, and see he saw quite a few. Fan's were always handing him drawings and sketches to autograph or keep.
Steve muttered in his sleep and Tony yanked his hand back as Steve's eyes flew open.
"Tony?" Steve muttered turning over to face him. "You're awake." He said, a smile playing across his lips.
Tony caught his breath, and immediately wondered why he had.
"Ah, yeah. I'm awake!" Tony said, throwing out his hands theatrically "How long have I been, you know, out?"
Steve's eyebrows pulled together for a second as he thought. "About 19 hours I think."
Tony swore and tried to get out of bed but Steve was on him immediatly.
"Oh no you don't!" he said pushing Tony back into the bed and tucking him in. "You've had a rough past couple of days Tony.
And you're not getting up till I've made sure you've consumed something other than scotch and wine."
"Okay... Um, not to be rude or anything, But... Why do you care?" Tony asked, his tone puzzled, not offensive.
Steve's face softened, and a light blush crept up his neck "That's a stupid question Tony. . . You're my friend and I care about you, I don't like seeing you hurting yourself like this."
Tony couldn't come up with a reply to that. So he just sat back in the bed with a stunned expression.
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Steve hadn't been lying, he assured himself he really did care. He just hadn't told Tony how much. Though that was mostly because he wasn't even fully aware of it yet himself.
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Over the next few days Steve took it upon himself to stay with Tony as much as possible. And whenever Tony started to go quiet and get that look in his eye that said he was thinking about Pepper, Steve would suggest they go get lunch from kitchen or go out on the terrace for some fresh air. He even tried to get Tony to leave the tower, but Tony had refused. Steve didn't want to push Tony to hard so they went down to the gym to train instead. Steve promised Tony he would show him some martial arts moves he'd learned from one of his army buddies back in the day, and Tony taught Steve a meditaion technique he'd picked up from Yinsen .
Vv~v~v~v~v~v~v~vV
Over the next two weeks Tony got so used to Steve's company that when Steve had to go on a mission Tony forgot he was gone and searched the tower for him for an hour before Jarvis Informed him the Captain was gone. Tony just shrugged it off, laughed at himself and went back to work.
The next day when Tony was working down in the lab He asked Steve a question over his shoulder, when he all he was met with was silence he turned and surveyed the empty lab.
Tony's pulse quickened and he could feel he chest tighten as his breath began to come in short gasps.
Tony tried to regulate his breathing in an effort to calm himself. But his knees gave out and he fell to the floor, calling out for Steve as the panic attack over took him.
V~v~V
Steve returned 5 hours later to find the lab as much of a disaster as the first time. One of the bot's lay on it's side in the middle of the lab, now painted to look like Godzilla. Tony was sitting on the sofa in a black tank top and boxers, singing old Irish drinking songs, while he inhaled liqour like a fish does water.
"Tony? What happened? I-"
"Steeeeve!" Tony yelled happily, falling into a giggliing heap on the floor after he attepted to stand and greet the soldier.
Steve was almost ready to shout at Tony, to give him a piece of his mind for destroying the lab again, when Tony's face changed. He looked scared, and he began gasping and crying.
"S-St- Steve!" he cried out, curling himself inward and clutching at the reactor. Steve rushed to his side and took the brunett in his arms.
"Shh, it's okay Tony, it's okay. I'm here." Steve said softly, stroking Tony's hair. Tony sobbed and clutched at Steve's shirt
"I thought you'd left. Gone, like Pepper, like my Dad, Like everyone else I ever cared about."
Steve hugged him closer and whispered. "I'll never leave you. I promise."
Tony sobbed again and then did something Steve was not prepared for. . .
Pulling away from Steve Tony cupped the his face and pulled him into a kiss. Steve grunted in surprised but didn't pull away. In fact, after his initial shock he leaned in.
A small part of his brain told him that this was weird. that He wasn't the sort of person who kissed guys, especially guyslike Tony Stark. But when Tony ran his hand up Steves sides and down his back that (very very small) part of him fell silent.
When they pulled apart Tony stroked Steve's cheek and whispered a slurred "Please Don't leave." before passing-out in Steve's arm's. Steve gazed down in awe at the man in his arms, and wondered vaugely if Tony would remember any of this when he woke up.
End Chapter One.
Well there you go, This will be (unless for some odd reason I decide otherwise) a Three chapter Fic.
Smut will be in the second chapter, fluff in the third.
I've already written most of it and am just in the editing stages.