Authoress' Note: Eh, just something I thought about while I was brushing my teeth. XD I needed to get my creative juices flowing… And hell, I just wanna write.. Something… -.-.. Do keep in mind that I don't have a beta, so pardon any grammatical mistakes especially in the subject-verb agreement part ('cause that's where I need help according to my SAT XD). Reviews and constructive criticism are very much welcomed. Flames are ignored (because they are useless).

WARNINGS: RoyEd, mild shonen ai, a little OOC and a dose of !crack! XD

DISCLAIMER: I don't own Full Metal Alchemist, nor do I own Roy nr Ed (who doesn't WISH though? T-T). They all belong to Hiromu Arakawa and other related… thingies…

Everyone knew that old saying, popularized as it was by the ones-who-have-seen -- those people that were careless and stupid enough to invoke the "wrath worse than Hell"…

In this case the careless and stupid one was Colonel Roy Mustang. Usually a smart, tactful person (why wouldn't he be, he was -- is -- Colonel) one could only guess why the great Flame Alchemist decided to be stupid and tactless now.

Hell hath no fury than a woman…

"Hey." knock knock. "Please open the door."

No fury than a woman…

"Please! (more knocks) I can explain!"

Than a woman…

"…"

What was that again? Roy wondered. Hell hath no fury than a woman--?

There was a BAM and the Colonel found himself lying on the cold floor. My request was granted, he thought rather sarcastically. There were angry uneven stomps going away from him. Roy heard something that suspiciously sounded like a sob.

He felt a pang of guilt.

What a mess I found myself in. He sighed. And in the morning too!

"Hey," he called, going after the footsteps. "Hey! Wait! I can honestly expl--" POOF. Something soft and fluffy and smelling like gold smacked him square on the face. "--ain myself!" He wrenched the pillow from his face. Though it does smell good, he thought.

"Edward," Roy pleaded. "Hear me out! Please!" he added for good measure.

"NO," Ed bellowed -- for he was, in fact, Edward Elric. "I can't BELIEVE you'd do that!"

And he began pelting Roy with pillows.

"Ed!"

"I never thought you'd do it!"

"No, please! It's not what you think--!"

"THEN WHAT THE HELL IS IT?!"

"I told you I can explain--!"

"NO. NO YOU CAN'T!" Ed's hand found the Mug of Morning Coffee and he threw that at Roy too.

Roy squeaked (in a manly way) and dodged it. "I can!" He pointed at the smashed ceramic on the floor. "And that's my favorite mug!"

"I DON'T CARE!!!"

"Edward…!!" Roy pleaded.

"NO!"

"I really didn't know!"

"SHUT UP!"

"I'm SORRY!"

"BASTARD!"

"Please, Ed!"

Ed huffed and stomped out of the room. Roy followed, at a safe distance.

"I didn't mean to eat the last cookie!!!"

-fin-

Hell Hath No Fury

By Ame Mika'zuki

5 de enero 2007

A RoyEd fic