disclaimer: i own nothing. :[
shames.
song: "Stand still look pretty" by The Wreckers.
i wrote this AGES ago, back when the whole Edge/Lita/Matt thing was kinda blowing over and before Lita quit.
she was one of my ultimate favs.
miss her!
Anyway, hope you like. :]
READ&REVIEW. :D:D:D
THAAANKS.
I want to paint my face
And pretend that I am someone else
Sometimes I get so fed up
I don't even want to look at myself
The crowd erupts and the lights are so bright they are blinding. You stand at the top of the ramp, a crowd of over thirty thousand fans chant and scream at you.
It used to be for you.
As your character, you throw a dirty glance at the people currently screaming sordid remarks at you, as your character its your job to make the crowd hate you, they made that decision on their own. The dirty glare is from you as well, letting them know you think that ninety percent of this crowd should get a life and stop judging you and telling you how to live yours.
Everybody makes mistakes, huge, life-changing mistakes and they never get told about. But you, being in this industry, word spreads you cheat, people make up their mind and that's you, ruined.
You made one fucking mistake. You knew you shouldn't have. But you did. You cant go back and change it.
Its been almost two years and the three of you are in a good place, you all talk and get on now, maybe not as good as before, but still…good.
But people have problems that are worse than mine
I don't want you to think I'm complaining all the time
And I hate the way you look at me I have to say
I wish I could start over
[Flashback]
"Hey Red!" Adam runs up to you, slightly out of breath, god knows how long he's been chasing you, thank god for ipods, they block the sound of everything!
"Hey" You reply, you just want to be left alone, one thing about this whole scenario, your beginning to feel less and less like yourself everyday.
"You okay?"
"Yep, just burning off some steam, go get ready for the show I'll meet you at the curtain later, I need to talk to Trish."
"Sure thing, see ya!" he waves and turns back towards the direction he came from, you head for the ramp, the crowds haven't arrived yet, everything has just been set up, they are testing the lights and mics just now ready for the show in a few hours time.
"Trish!" you spot the blonde jogging up and down the stairs, that would soon be filled with people screaming at you later,
"Ames! babes, how are you?" She reaches out for a hug and you welcome the friendly embrace.
"Okay, how was you week back home?" You envy her for that, she got to go home and be her for a week, while you were at conferences and signings meeting fans that actually wanted to see you and tell you how much they loved you, the odd one telling you what a stupid cow you were, those ones you ignored.
Trish tells you more about her time off while you both running the stairs, you thank god that people backstage have gotten over this. It was one of the biggest scandals ever, everyone got involved which drove you to insanity. But some people stuck by you and never judged. Which your thankful for.
"So you ready for the show?" She questions.
"Oh yeah, ready to be called a slut and a whore for twenty minutes, I cant freakin' wait."
"C'mon Ames, its not all that bad, I had to deal with it too."
"Yeah, but they got over that, no-one is willing to get over this, its not like we're still together or anything! Urgh, I hate it. I used to love this business with everything in me. Now, im not so sure."
Trish leans in again for a hug. "C'mon, lets go hide Lillian's boots, you know how funny it is when she freaks out."
You both laugh as you head back towards the locker room.
At least one person was there for you.
[End Flashback]
I am slowly falling apart
I wish you'd take a walk in my shoes for a start
You might think it's easy being me
You just stand still, look pretty
You stand at ringside.
Stand, at ringside.
That's your job now, you're a full-time valet, even with the hardy boys you got involved in their matches, you cant remember your last proper wrestling match. Yeah, you fought Maria, but c'mon, that wasn't much of a fight.
You'd give anything to have a one-on-one match again, with Trish, or Victoria, those matches were always the best fun.
"Stand still, look hot and cheer on your man."
That was your advice, that was what you got told to do during this match. How fucking kind!? You pretty much changed the face of the women's industry when you started in this business and know your being told to 'Stand still look pretty.'
Sometimes I find myself shaking
In the middle of the night
And then it hits me and I can't
Even believe this is my life
The match finally ends and you couldn't get out of there quick enough. You walk back through the curtain, past everyone standing there, Adam stops, being congratulated on the fantastic job he did in the ring.
You walk straight on the Divas locker room, you walk in and see something that scares you slightly.
Change.
Once, you'd walk back into the locker room and everyone would be sitting discussing matches they've had or ones that they wish they could compete in. You remember back when you were in a cage match with Victoria, when you both made your way back, all the girls were in awe of the pair of you, wishing they could have done something incredible like that, or when you were one of the first women to be in the main event!
Now its girls sitting around doing their hair and make-up talking about guys or anything but wrestling. It was like high school!
Some traditions never die, you spot Trish and Victoria sitting on the sofa in their sweatpants and tank tops, chatting away about previous times, back when this industry, especially the women were idolized, when they were in ratings changing matches, instead of pillow fights and dressing in pretty much nothing but their underwear.
"My my how times have changed." You tell the girls as you sit in the middle of them. They both nod along in agreement and fill you in on their conversation.
But people have problems that are worse than mine
I don't want you to think I'm complaining all the time
And I wish that everyone would go and shut their mouths
I'm not strong enough to deal with it
You walk through the arena at the end of the night, bumping into one man, the one you part of you still wishes you could spend the rest of your life with. But you know there's no way it could happen, he's dating a girl now.
Eve.
A girl the complete opposite to you, you get into a conversation, a good one, before its interrupted by her.
She waltzes up to you both, hair done perfectly, make-up applied thickly, wearing very little, as you said, the complete opposite of you.
Matt asks you, just ending the conversation nicely, he asks what you're gonna go do on your couple of days off. You smile at him and answer simply;
"Im gonna go be me for a while."
With that said, you drag you suitcase from the arena in search of you car before you hear some people scream your name.
"Amy Dumas! Hurry up! We have movies to watch!"
You laugh and walk towards the rented jeep with your girls standing outside, you all clamber in and head for the hotel for as much needed girly night in.
review?
appreciated muchly. :]
merci beaucoup. (y)