The little black oblong of metal and glass was something that confounded Killian when he first saw it. It had appeared magically on the kitchen table, as if plucked from another realm and yet it otherwise looked entirely unremarkable. He'd laughed at first when Emma had told him that he could talk to people through it, and hold actual full length human conversations. its just a bloody piece of metal. he thought to himself it's like talking to a wall, or a cup. Next thing I'll be discussing current affairs with a shoe.
"I'll admit" Emma began "It sounds kinda stupid. But just hear me out."
"Stupid? Bloody ridiculous more like" Hook chided, looking at the gadget sceptically.
"today we're doing a call. All you've got to is turn it on, press the call button then tap my face? 'Kay? I've already loaded it with all our pictures, so you can't call my mom by mistake."
"But there aren't any button's on the thing... it's just a flat box!"

She was yet to breach the topic of text messages but thought it best to leave that for another time, having to explain a keyboard would give Killian a massive headache and the pirate couldn't put up with much bamboozlement without getting irritated and threatening to run his hook through the damned thing. There were already several scratches where he'd attempted to bash it to pieces after failing to even turn it on.

"Okay okay Killian!" Emma had said that evening she'd found him in the compromising position, holding the phone in the air ready to dash it against the worktop
"Where's the turn-it-on button then? Show me. I can't-"
"Yeah Okay, it's on the side, just there-just... just push it in."
"Like that?" he clicked the button twice, causing a faint electronic click but nothing much else.
"Nope. That turned it off again. Just click it down once, 'kay?"
The pirate scrunched up his face, and with a gently shaking thumb pushed the power button on the side.
"Oh!" he said, as the bottom side of the device suddenly bloomed with light. "Is it supposed to have lights?
"Yes" Emma suppressed a giggle "that means it's working. Turn it over" He did. And looked confusedly at the matrix of squares which riddled the screen. The colours truly bombarding his senses.
"that's the call button." she had said, pointing to a green shape, with a white C in the middle.

"You're going to call me, okay?" Emma instructed now, poking at the screen which shone an irradiate white all over her face. "But I'm going to leave the room just to make sure you know what you're doing"
"No! I-I don't... SWAN!" but too late, she was out of the door before he could finish his exclamation of intense distress. He couldn't be left alone with the demonic phone... it could be dangerous, he could break it or something. He'd even heard about little kids like Henry wracking up massive bills on things called apps, and simply couldn't risk that. As a one time ruler of one of the seven seas he couldn't be beaten by a shiny black box though.
"JUST PRESS THE EMMA BUTTON!" his new found crush shouted from the hallway.

After a few moments of staring at the screen in fear, and of his brain sending all its signals to run away, to throw the thing in the trash and just leave, he found the green button she'd shown him before and put a finger to it. Immediately a gallery of photos appeared of people across Storybrooke, there was Regina. The black haired vixen with who'd called him "Guyliner..." whatever that meant. Then David, the chiseled prince of... wherever smiling out at him with two fingers held by his face.
And finally there was Emma, giving a wide eyed grin which while rare suited her well. He pressed another finger to her face and the picture expanded to fill the whole screen. With this he set the device to his ear.

"Hello?" the pirate said, tentatively, feeling more than a little bit foolish for talking into the thing. His bashfulness was swiftly assuaged when he heard Emma's voice emanate from it.
"Hi Killian." she sounded relieved "You did it!"
"Aye!-But Emma... I can hear you perfectly well without this bloody thing. Why don't you just talk to me?"
"that's not the point. What if you or I or Henry get into trouble and you need to talk to us."
"Then I'll just scream really loudly and just hope to god you hear me... it's what I did at sea, or flares? I could use flares?"
"I'm not letting you blow anything up. Last time you sent a flare Leroy nearly had a heart attack!"