Wahey for not writing what I'm supposed to be working on.

It may look like Maiko, but it's actually Maizula. Warnings for femslash.

Dedicated to Mija, you moron.

Green-Eyed Monster

"Yes, you make a good point, Yu Meng – but truly, I do find the Earth Kingdom fashions to be really rather dull."

Zuko poked at his food with his chopsticks. He hated when the adults droned on about uninteresting subjects like this. Whenever they had family round, it always seemed to happen – and during dinner, too, where he was unable to escape to the sanctuary of his room.

A snippet of conversation caught his interest, and he blinked.

"– Azula looking so much older than the last time we saw her?" one of Zuko's aunts cooed, and he smirked slightly at the bottled up fury and embarrassment evident on his sister's face.

His great-aunt (or some distant relative – he'd begun to lose track of who was who) replied with an enthusiastic nod, "Oh definitely. How long has it been – two years? My, how time flies – yes, Azula is surely a young woman now, no longer the girl she used to be." The woman sounded wistful and quite – far too much, in Zuko's opinion – emotional about the whole matter. So what if his sister had hit puberty? It happens to everyone – and it was about time, too. She was already twelve.

Azula herself shot Zuko a fiery glare from across the table when she caught his smirk, but miraculously no one else around the large table spotted it. If only they knew what a terror she is.

Zuko raised an eyebrow as if to say, Just try to attack me here.

Unfortunately, the taunt backfired, as she kicked him very hard and very painfully in the shin. It took all of Zuko's willpower not to just throw his plate at her and be done with it.

"What about you, Zuko?" a short, plump lady asked him.

He blinked, and muttered intelligently, "Huh?"

Azula rolled her eyes.

"We were just wondering if you've found a girlfriend yet. Surely a young, handsome man such as yourself has been able to catch a pretty girl?"

Shit.

There was an awkward silence that extended just a little too long as Zuko flailed internally for some half-decent excuse as to why he was still single. He was a prince, for crying out loud. He had girls all over him.

Azula saved the day. "Of course he has a girlfriend."

Or not.

He was certain that his expression completely gave away her improvised lie, but no one called him out on it – so he continued to gape at his sister in abject horror as he wondered what in all hells she was doing. Is this another one of her plans to publicly humiliate me?

"Oh, really?" This news seemed to excite the royal ladies even more, and they appeared to somehow cluster around Azula as she weaved a tight web of damning lies.

She nodded matter-of-factly. "Yes, she's quite beautiful."

"What's her name?"

Azula smirked, and her eyes glinted as she turned to look right at him. "Yes, brother, why don't you tell them what her name is?"

Zuko felt his gut drop into his polished boots. No way was Azula doing this to him. There was no possibility of making up a name – his relatives would surely want to be introduced to her. He frantically scoured his brain for a girl roughly his age who wouldn't mind pretending to be his girlfriend, but who wouldn't actually expect him to kiss her; there was only one girl he could think of. "Uh," he mumbled, "Mai."

"Mai," his aunt repeated in a romantic voice, and he wanted to puke right then and there. "A beautiful name for a beautiful girl."

"How is her family?"

Because wealth and status were all that seemed to matter as far as love in the Fire Nation was concerned. "Of high standing," he answered a little more confidently. That, at the very least, was not a lie.

"Oh, how wonderful. When can we meet her?"

It was the height of the dry season, and as such the earth was parched and cracked. What little grass there was seemed to be wilting in front of her very eyes as the sun baked it alive.

What a depressing image.

Mai sighed, drawing her knees up a little further and readjusting the book she was balancing precariously against them. She'd been at the palace for at least a week now, and she swore the only person who had spoken to her was her maidservant. It wasn't that she wasn't used to being alone; she simply didn't like it. Unfortunately, her stoic character had the effect of deterring any potential friends.

Except Azula, who was far too self-confident to be intimidated by anyone, no matter how silent they were or how much black they wore. Mai thought that while generally looked down upon, this was one of Azula's best traits. One could do many things with that much confidence and determination.

She'd just turned the page when she heard the sound of footsteps. Looking up from her book, she saw a teenager. On second glance, she recognised him as Prince Zuko, Azula's older brother – the boy she shared a birthday with.

Mai didn't know much about him besides what Azula had told her: namely, that he was a weak-hearted, wishy-washy coward of a prince with absolutely no talent and a disgusting love of animals.

"Uh, Mai? Can I… speak to you for a moment?" The prince sounded hesitant and extremely awkward, and it made Mai feel uncomfortable just looking at that much embarrassment.

She shrugged lightly and closed her book, remembering to dog-ear her current page. Zuko didn't extend an arm to help her stand – but then again, she didn't need one. She didn't care for unnecessary formalities. "Sure."

She followed him through the corridors until they reached the prince's private wing – well, this was interesting. No one was allowed to enter his wing except his sister and the Fire Lord without his explicit permission.

He gestured vaguely for her to keep following, and she ignored the startled and confused glances she was receiving from the guards stationed around the halls. Eventually, they reached a door that the prince seemed to find appropriate, and he held it open for her.

"Mai," he repeated once the door was shut behind them. She noted idly that they were in an expansive lounge. "I need to ask a favour of you."

She blinked in curiosity. People didn't tend to ask her for favours, and she had nothing better to do than cater to the strange prince's requests. "What do you need?"

Zuko cleared his throat. He refused to meet her eyes as he murmured, "I need you to pretend to date me. Please."

Mai was not expecting that.

He hurried to explain himself. "It's not what you think – we had relatives, and Azula told them I had a girlfriend and I don't, and now they want to meet her and I just kind of said it was you by accident and…" he trailed off, looking quite humiliated.

The explanation hadn't made much sense, but Mai got the gist of it. If it was Azula's fault, she supposed she'd better at least try to help. "Okay, but you have to kiss me," she deadpanned.

The prince looked really rather mortified. "Uh –"

She breathed out a short laugh. "It was a joke," she said dryly. "I'm not going to make you kiss me. I know you're gay."

At this, Zuko looked even more mortified. "How d-did you –" he stuttered, abruptly cutting himself off.

"Azula told me. It's okay, I'm gay too."

Now the poor prince just looked very flustered and highly confused. Mai felt a little sorry for him. "Come on, don't you have to show me off to your relatives?"

Azula could feel the anger bubbling in her stomach as she watched Zuko introduce Mai to his family. Why did he have to choose her? Ty Lee would have filled the role wonderfully. Or any other palace girl, in fact. Zuko had girls asking him out left right and centre – most just wanted his money and position, but at least a couple of them genuinely liked him.

Though Azula couldn't think why; Zuko had worse social skills than a sewer rat.

And what made it worse was that Mai just played the part so naturally, as if she really was his girlfriend. She smiled at everything Zuko said – and Mai's smiles were so rare – and she even let him drape an arm around her waist as they all sat around the garden together. Like happy little garden gnomes.

It made Azula sick.

She stormed off under the pretence (or was it a pretence?) of feeling 'a little under the weather' and as soon as she was out of sight of her relatives, the nearest pot plant erupted in howling blue flames.

Azula watched through a haze of fury as the green leaves withered into ash before her eyes. Why did it have to be Mai? Zuko had no right to choose her!

The guards surrounding her were beginning to rest idle hands on the hilts of their swords, so Azula marched off in fury to her private chambers in order to properly stew about the miserable turn of events.

She'd meant it as a tease. Zuko would make some crap up about having a girlfriend in order to protect his manly integrity – or some other pathetic excuse – and then the family would ask to meet her, and everyone would find out he lied through his teeth and he'd be humiliated and ashamed.

That was what was supposed to happen.

But it seemed even Azula's flawless plans presented problems when put into action. For starters, she hadn't intended Zuko to call on someone they actually knew. And the idiot was smarter than he looked; he'd chosen the one girl who wouldn't really care as long as it was mildly interesting.

Damn Mai and her stupid indifference. Curse Mai and her infuriating tolerance!

Azula slammed the door to her bedroom shut behind her. It was all Mai's fault. She was the one who ignored Azula's advances. She was the one who never let Azula's threats bother her. She was the one who'd agreed to be Zuko's girlfriend – it didn't matter if it was all fake and staged. It shouldn't be Zuko's arm around her beautifully slim waist, it should be hers!

She wiped her eyes violently against the rough material of her sleeve, cursing the wicked girl's name when her sleeve came back damp. Why was Mai so… Mai? She shouldn't be so willing and compliant, just dating someone because it might be fun. What was the point in dating someone at all if you weren't interested in them? Where was the happiness in that?

Because that's all Azula wanted, really. To be happy. With Mai by her side.

Not that it'll ever happen now, Azula thought ruefully, and thanks to one of my own jokes! What irony.

She sniffed one final time before clenching a fist. She wasn't like Zuko. She wasn't weak. If she wanted Mai, she'd find a way to get her.

Azula fled with renewed determination to her en suite to try and repair the damage to her make-up. Her eyeliner wasn't waterproof, apparently, and somewhere along the line she'd smudged her lipstick, too. She washed and scrubbed the remainders of it off and picked up the stick of kohl – but Mai had always said she didn't need make-up.

She returned the kohl to her vanity.

The clang of armour as the guards flinched when she threw open her door was satisfying. What would be more satisfying, however…

The tall girl was slouched against a tree, absent-mindedly braiding one of her pigtails as steel grey eyes darted across the pages in front of her. Zuko was nowhere to be found, as were the rest of her vapid relatives.

Azula steeled her nerves and calmed the trembling of her hands. "Mai!"

Mai glanced up, and upon seeing Azula, she closed her book, forgetting to mark her place. "Azula."

"You can't date Zuko anymore," Azula snarled, deciding to cut right to the chase. For some reason, the thought of manipulating Mai brought an unpleasant writhing sensation to her stomach.

Mai blinked slowly up at her. "Why?" she answered shortly, seeming remarkably unsurprised by the sudden, unjustified announcement.

"Because –" and Azula hesitated. She never hesitated. And neither did she stammer or mumble, but her next sentence left her mouth as both. "Because I w-want you to date me instead."

Azula was caught in an internal panic. She hadn't meant to sound so desperate. What was Mai going to think of her now – a hesitating, stammering, mumbling, desperate – "Mmph!"

After a good few mind-shattering seconds, Mai pulled back from the kiss, though she didn't let go of the front of Azula's shirt. "You're so stupid," she murmured gently.

Azula fell to her knees, her body dead weight in the wake of the unexpected kiss. Her amber eyes were round and her lips parted in shock – she was completely and utterly speechless.

"I was never dating Zuko in the first place." Mai smiled. "I'd never date anyone but you, Azula."