Summary: Castle ignores a call from Beckett to think.
Disclaimer: I own nothing of the TV show CASTLE or the characters contained in the fic
Rating: T
Pairing: Kate and Castle
CONSIDERING KATE BECKETT
Castle sat in his office staring at his computer; just staring and brooding. He had had a solid flow of words up until two hours ago when it stopped. Rick had never had that happen to him when he was on a roll. The flow was continuous and it tapered off, not abruptly stopped. Right now he had no words to even describe how having no words made him feel. It was unnerving. All he could think about was Kate Beckett. She invaded his mind in the waking world and she was beginning to disturb his dreaming domain as well. Kate Beckett was everywhere. He didn't know how to feel about her, he knew he cared about her, but to what extent? Rick had run into a burning building just to find her two weeks ago. The fear had clawed at him from the street and dogged his steps as he moved past the smoke two weeks ago. He had found her alive, naked, but alive and breathing. His heart lightened at the sight of her. Then a few days ago a new Detective came to the precinct and he was like Kate in every way where Castle was the exact and total opposite.
Castle felt as if he was losing her, losing something that was between them. Richard only realized that he was losing her when he saw her and Demming laughing at her desk. They were close together and she had her body angled towards his. On principle Castle didn't like the man because he seemed more suited to Beckett. It hurt him now to know that she might not be interested in him beyond his books, even if that. Maybe Demming was more her type; he was an officer, he had a badge, and he understood and abided by the rules Castle habitually broke just to be in the thick of things. After all he was just a rich and famous novelist with numerous awards and books. If he knew what was good for him then he would back off. He had enough material in his head and in his notes for ten more Nikki Heat novels, and yet he wasn't going to stop helping with cases. In theory Castle knew he should leave, but was he going to? No, he wasn't; he was a glutton for punishment. Castle didn't want to lose being around Beckett but he had to face the fact that she might not want him after all.
RING!
Castle looked at his iPhone and saw it was Beckett calling. After the conclusions he came to and the decision he made did he want to answer it? Did he want to close the door on his latest train of thought and head into the world of death? For the first time since meeting Det. Kate Beckett, Castle let the call go to voice mail. He had no want to enter the land of death; he had no want to enter her world, her domain.
AT THE STATION:
Kate stared at her phone for a few minutes after hitting the end button. Castle had ignored her call; he had ignored her. It didn't make sense; he would never ignore her when she was on a case. Why was he starting now? Even though they had closed their case a few days ago he would always hang around the bullpen and soak up every bit of cop jargon and inane facts that he could for his books. So why was he ignoring her? It was as if he was intentionally distancing himself from her.
Kate had sensed the growing chasm between them a day before they closed the last case. It had only been a few days and yet the void grew and grew. Even when they are in the final stages of solving a murder Castle was usually in hr personal space, hovering and making his outlandish theories, but this last one he had acted like a non-annoying human and kept out of her way, out of her space, and kept his theories to himself. Beckett couldn't believe this was bothering her so much, but it actually was. Castle had been nothing but a pain since the day she had met him, since she had arrested him. The one thing she had wished for more than anything was for him to leave her alone, to gather his data, and leave her life. So, now that she was getting her wish why did it bother her? Kate shook her head and looked up in time to see Demming crossing the bullpen towards her. He took long purposeful strides until he was at her desk and smiling a brilliant smile.
"Kate, hey, do you want to grab some lunch? My treat," Demming offered.
"I can't, sorry, something came up," Beckett answered while she reached for her keys and jacket before hurrying to the elevator.
CASTLE'S APARTMENT:
Castle had put his head down on his desk and lightly banged his forehead trying to dislodge some words for his next novel. A few minutes into the banging he sensed someone watching him. He was more concerned with getting a few ideas to shake loose than he was about someone watching him. Maybe they would get bored and leave, but he had no such luck. There were only a few possibilities on who it could be. Alexis was at school, his mother was shopping. So it was either Beckett or his agent. Right now he was hoping for Paula his agent. Looking up he saw Beckett. This time when he dropped his head onto his desk it left a loud resounding THUNK through the room.
Beckett watched him drop his head back down on his desk. She had the impulse to grab a fist full of his hair and yank his head back up, but knowing Castle he would either like it too much, or cry apples. It wasn't worth it. "You know Castle, I don't like being ignored," Beckett said as she walked around the desk.
"I was working." Castle grumbled and sat up.
"Oh, yeah, banging your head on your desk is accomplishing a lot of work." Beckett replied, sarcasm dripping from every word. "It looks like your brooding to me."
"It's not brooding, I'm contemplating." Castle got up out of his chair and walked to the kitchen in an attempt to escape.
Beckett followed him, "What could you be contemplating?"
"Starting something else, another project maybe," Castle faced her. He was lying, but he had to. As he thought about it more he couldn't keep hanging around the precinct, if he did he would never leave. Rick leaned back on the counter and crossed his arms over his chest. When he had been rethinking everything, he came to another conclusion; he had to let go, move on. Kate tolerated, even valued his input, but he was a nuisance to her and he knew it, but sometimes he could convince himself that he didn't care.
Inside Kate was stunned, shocked, at what she was hearing from him. He was going to leave this time and he sounded serious, more serious than she had ever heard him before. "So, you're giving up?"
"No, I said I was thinking. Let's face it I have enough material locked in my head for ten more Nikki Heat novels. I don't need to keep hanging around and getting in your way." Castle shrugged, giving off an air of nonchalance.
"Castle, you give valuable input."
"I'm just a writer who gets in your way."
"You know the one thing I wished since meeting you? I wished you would go away, get your data, your notes, and leave me the hell alone to write your damn book but now…" Kate shrugged in return to show she had nothing to fill in the rest of her sentence. She knew she cared about Castle, but it was complicated. He was just so… Richard Castle and she was Kate Beckett. They always argued but he could make her laugh, he could make her think, and he helped her solve cases.
"Yeah, well, now you can get your wish."
"That's not what I want anymore," Kate moved around the center island to stand in front of him. "I want you around, I want you annoying me, and I want your input on solving cases. Sometime you see things that I miss. Being a writer is an advantage to me more than it' a hindrance."
"But why do you want me around, YOU, not for the reason's you listed?" Castle wanted to stop back, move away, but he didn't
"I want," Kate cast her gaze down and took a deep, calming breath so she could continue, "I want you around because you make me laugh, you make me think, and we make a good team." She smiled at him before adding, "Like Starsky and Hutch or Turner and Hooch."
Castle smiled and this time he could tell the smile reached his eyes. Those had been the same words he had used on her. He had used them to get her to let him stay shadowing her. A sort of peace descended over him, settled in his mind. Beckett never said anything she didn't mean. It wasn't in her to lie flat out. Without conscious thought Rick leaned in close to her and brushed his lips to hers, barely the touch of a butterfly's wing. There was no doubt about it he had kissed her and he was going to do it again. Applying more pressure Castle leaned into her so she could feel more of him against her; he needed to feel her.
Kate couldn't believe that Richard Castle was kissing her, that she was allowing him to kiss her. Why hadn't she backed away? Why was she reaching her arms up to drape them over his shoulders? She leaned against him and kissed him back. Kate Beckett was actually kissing Richard Castle in his own kitchen and she wasn't going to move back, wasn't going to break the new bond they were forming.
The End