Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight.... Oh but you don't have any idea how much I wish I did!
So Anyway, sorry if this sounds a little awkward at first. This is my life, I have the fears that Bella has in this story (I'm not 21 yet though.... like I care). I made the beginning a little awkward though because Bella's confused. She's scared that life is passing her by. Think about it, if you were barely 20 years old, all your friends around you have found their soulmate, know what they wanna be, but you keep struggling, wouldn't you be a bit scared too? I mean yes I'm still young, but in this day and age you have to grow up faster. In Twilight, Bella mostly cared for her mom (much like what I do) and then her dad (yeah I sometimes do that too...) she had to grow up fast, but luckily for her she had Edward. And don't worry, he's in this one! What kinda person would I be if I wrote a Twilight fan fiction without Edward, I might add Jake too... we'll see, I wouldn't be able to paint him as the bad guy though.... :/ Well anyway I hope you guys enjoy! Please review and leave me some feedback!!
College life. Wow, I didn't really think that it would really be this boring. My name's Bella, Bella Swan, I'm 21 years old... oh yay, I can legally buy alcohol, not that I'd want to. Not after seeing what it did to my mother. To my family. I go to California State University of Northridge. I was supposed to be here for music, but all my plans failed when I failed the audition. So I decided to come here on an undecided major.
Well now I'm in my third year, still just mindlessly taking general ed classes, trying to figure out what I wanna do with my life. In my off time I work at the local Borders Bookstore. I thought I should teach english, but just a look at the course list made me freak. How do they expect you to finish GEs and course credits in just four years? I guess thats why most people don't graduate till after five or six.
I try to push my mind to read instead of worry. Sure, I have no idea of what will happen when I graduate with just the completion of my GEs. Sure it scared me to death thinking I would only have a diploma, but really no special job. I thought for a while, film making sounds fun. I once walked through the film lab in high school, but when one of the tech guys was trying to explain to me what each person's different editing job and filming, and even the sound guys, I just kinda stared blankly.... I felt bad, but I guess it's good that I know that film wasn't me. I thought maybe once I could be a designer of some sort, but when they told me I would have to take drawing classes I just groaned. Music was my life.
I was a band geek at Forks High School, in Forks, Washington. I played Clarinet in the symphonic orchestras, I would've marched but my clumsiness proved to me that I'd rather just break a reed rather than my body or my instrument. I was first chair for most of high school... but when it came to that audition, I guess you could say I choked.... really bad!
"Isabella Swan?" Professor Marx called me into his office. I had my clarinet out and ready in one of my hands, music folder in my other hand. I stepped into his office, shaking visually. He chuckled, "Now Miss Swan, no need to be nervous. I was reading over your file, I can't believe-" he held it up, closed, but I knew what it held as much of it I submitted myself. "Straight A's, involvement in Symphonic Orchestra, Jazz Bands, Pit Orchestra... What musicals have you played?"
I stiffened for a moment at the sudden question, "Umm... West Side Story, The Producers, Beauty and the Beast, My Fair Lady, The Boyfriend, A Wonderful Life, Willy Wonka, and Singing In The Rain." I said nervously, he chuckled again but seemed slightly amazed at my long list. I not only played in school, but I volunteered in the community orchestra that played in Port Angeles Theater of the Arts.
"Ok, well I guess now all we need is an audition, which shouldn't be too hard for you, Miss Section Leader." He playfully joked. I put my music on the music stand he set up in the room, there was some music already on it and I guessed that was my sight reader and some scales. I took a deep breath and placed the mouthpiece to my lips, I blew the air into the instrument except instead of the beautiful woody sound that usually came from it the horn emitted a strain of squeaks. I quickly adjusted the instrument and tried again, but no avail. I felt the tears well up in my eyes, I knew this would happen, it happened when I first tried out for my conductor in high school; but luckily he took me anyway cause he had to and I somehow worked my way up by sophomore year. I didn't know why it always did this. It was like the instrument refused to work properly when I was soloing on it. My saxophones all did just fine, but I really wanted to get in on my clarinet. My first instrument, and now my last.
Since that day I haven't touched another instrument, I used to play loads; clarinet, flute, saxophone, even a little trumpet, percussion, and I dabbled a bit on piano... but no more. I locked my instruments up in the back of my significantly large closet in the apartment I shared with my roommates; Alice Brandon and Rosalie Hale. We all went to Forks and were best friends, so they understood knew my history with music, and devastated that I failed my audition they countlessly tried to encourage me to try again. They even tried to lure me over to the music buildings all freshmen year, but when I finally broke down and sobbed- uncharacteristically- they gave up and just succumbed to the fact that their friend had given up on her one true passion.
"Bella, get your butt in here! Now!" Alice shouted from the front room. I put my pen down on the sheet of work housing my astronomy homework and ran to see what was the matter. When I entered the room Alice stood there in a flowery blue sundress. Yeah I guess it was that time again.
In Forks the sun rarely came out, so while we lived in California we went out to enjoy it as much as possible. I looked towards Rosalie's door as she stepped out wearing a pink sundress like Alice's except for the color and pattern. I was guessing this was Alice's latest project for class. Alice was majoring in Fashion design and sometimes we would reap the benefits of her class projects, of course we usually had to suffer for her art as well, being models and mannequins as she stuck pins in our sides. But apparently this was one project that I didn't have to suffer through.
"I made this for you." She said holding up the delicate purple and white fabric. I was usually adverse to wearing dresses, I had this annoyance for my disproportional size and I hated the fact that my knees were so knobby and my skin was paler than a ghost. But I couldn't hurt my best friend's feelings by rejecting the dress, so I took it reluctantly and stalked into the bathroom. Unfortunately it fit like a glove and showed off my curves with ease. Alice even made it slightly longer than hers and Rose's to make me feel more secure that I wasn't going to moon anyone, but it didn't cover my knees which I despised more now than ever before.
I walked slowly out of the bathroom, nervous for their reaction. Alice squealed while Rosalie just smiled approvingly. Before I knew it they whisked me back into the bathroom and I felt things being tugged, brushed, and plucked. About ten minutes later I walked from the bathroom groomed, legs freshly shaven, hair straight and some of it pulled back out of my face, my face a hint of make up, and I had on sandals with a slight heel on them. I was about to ask them what was going on, but they tugged me out the door without a word. This was gonna be a long night.