This world is full of horrible things. That's what I thought as I looked at nothing in the mirror. Anything that seems right is an illusion; anything that once was is gone. Like my reflection. Like love.
I sighed and turned my back on the cruel glass. What was there to do? When one has all the time in the world, everything they never had time for before seems trivial. All of those things I promised myself I'd do this summer I never got to do. I probably never would.
Everything now… seemed so inconsequential, so dull. The first day I had been excited—I had eternity before me. I could do anything I'd ever wanted to do without fear, for I could not die. I felt powerful, unstoppable. But then I soon learned that death is not the only scary thing in this world. Void is also frightening—not knowing what would take up the minutes, hours, days I had to dread.
Loneliness is another fear I had. Even Matthew, my supposed best friend, had turned his back on me when he learned how stubbornly I would hold onto my morals. To think that for all this time he had that dark secret of immortality. I was alone now, with no one to understand or comfort me.
Suddenly I remembered something Matthew had said last week—he mentioned a family, the Collins family. Or was it the Cullins? No matter. The mere thought of others, others who were not barbaric, gave me hope. I was not the only one who would refuse to kill a human just to satisfy the overwhelming, everlasting urge…. The tantalizing, seductive temptation to bite, eat, kill—no! I am NOT a murderer. If only I had something to keep my mind off of it…
Just like that, I decided that I would seek out this strange pack. By nature I was always a shy, timid person, even before… So when I made this decision, I was surprised. I normally have no inclination to meet or spend time with people I don't know. But I needed to find that safe harbor, that place that could finally be home. Ever since my life had been so coldly shattered, I could not feel anything except for this numbness, this aloneness. Even my heart ceased to beat.
Shaking my head to dispel these thoughts from my mind, I began to pack. I threw some clothes into a suitcase. I added a comb and a toothbrush as an afterthought. And then I was ready. Ready for a new life, ready to look forward and stop looking back. I was ready to take on the world, starting with the unknown town of Forks.
Hey, its me. Sorry if this chapter is boring. It's kind of like the prologue. Anyway, please review! I want to know if I should put the next chapter up or not.