Chapter one.

"Hello, Ares." The doctor spoke in a growl, his skeptical eyes fixed upon the once all powerful Greek God. The Doctor hated Aries, despised everything that the God of violence and bloodshed stood for, but he also knew that he needed the deity's help to locate her- the woman he desperately needed to find. The rude, overly muscled idiot in the black leather nodded once at the time lord, his face hard and creased into a slight frown. Aries didn't like the Doctor, either, so this conversation was going to be a bit awkward for the both of them.

"What do you want, freaky deaky outer space man?" He sauntered forward, puffing out his chest in a completely unnecessary show of masculinity.

The doctor rolled his eyes- Gods, even listening to this meat head was making him dumber by the second.

"Well…?" The tanned hunk raised his eyebrows and tapped his foot, acting as though meeting with the Man who was almost as old as he is was a super inconvenience.

"Let's cut to the chase, shall we, your bulkiness?" The Time Lord, dressed in a pin stripe suit, piped, "I'm looking for someone, and I know that you will know where to find her."

Aries actually laughed out loud- there was only one person that was a 'her' that anyone ever asked him about, and he wasn't about to give up her whereabouts so easily. He shrugged, feigning cluelessness.

"Who are you looking for?" He barked gruffly, "And besides, can't your blue chunk of junk find basically anyone, anywhere, any time?"

The spacemen huffed, running his hands through his disheveled black hair.

"I don't have time to explain this, but the TARDIS… she basically has a mind of her own. Your feeble brain wouldn't understand." He bit his lip. He regretted the last little insult as soon as he said it, and even more so when it prompted a slurry of insults from the Olympian.

"I am a GOD," Aries hulked with rage, "What in Hades name are you?! NOTHING compared to me."

The Doctor inhaled deeply, preparing to explain something that he was sure wouldn't be received well. "Actually… I'm pretty much… like you. Without the crazy messed up powers and super inflated egos, but still. We're from the same neighborhood- same solar system, actually."

The God had taken a deep breath, and crossed his arms, his eyebrows creased. His brown eyes bore into the time lord, scrutinizing him. "Explain." He ordered.

"Okay, this might take a while. You guys came from Titans, right? WRONG! Titans were actually the original inhabitants of Earth. And then Humans- somehow and miraculously- evolved from itty bitty cells all the way up into complex organisms and then all of the life on the planet came about. Trust me- I've seen it. They eventually got smart enough to want to get rid of the Titans and right when they were about to do it- Zeus crash landed and did it for him. His spaceship just wiped them out, basically. Humans died, too, but there were so many of them by that point that it didn't really matter."

Aries eyes widened, as suddenly things had started to make sense. Tragically, his old Dad was no longer around to confirm this story (not that he had really cared for him to begin with) - but why would he lie?

"You're saying that Zeus, my father, lied to all of us Gods?"

"oh no no no no," The Doctor was going a million miles an hour now- really getting into his explanation, "Zeus meant to come here, he just didn't smooth out the landing. He came with your Mum, too. And his ship had a memory swiper on it, meant to fabricate a history and make him believe whatever story was most likely at the time. Since the humans instantly started worshiping him because he killed the Titans- godhood seemed appropriate."

"Ok," Aries was worried that he had actually started to trust the space man. "So, back to the point. Why are you looking for Xena?"

The doctor smiled slightly, he had known that Aries had been playing coy with him. There was only one "she" in the Greek piece of junk's life, whether or not he had the kahunas to admit it. He likely knew where she was, at all times- probably followed her around. Odds are, she was within a couple of miles of where the pair was standing.

"Well. You remember the whole episode that lead to the death of most of your immediate and extended family? The whole Eve and 'power to kill Gods' thing and stuff like that?"

Aries nodded, looking annoyed and urging the Alien to go a bit faster- how could he forget the massacre that he had played a major- and disgraceful- role in?

"Well, based on a huge and ridiculous chain of events that I couldn't possibly hope to explain to you in less than three hours- involving Alien made weaponry capable of killing those who match a certain pattern- Xena and her 'gift' has become extremely valuable in a future situation. I need her help."

Aries laughed again, but this time his laugh was a bit softer, less mocking. It wasn't so much of a "oh you really are full of it" as it was an "ooooh you don't know what you've gotten yourself into," but regardless, he summoned a map to the ground before him and flung a dagger into it. He kneeled by it, and pointed to the place the dagger hit. "There," he pointed, "Is where you fill find Xena and Gabrielle. Good luck with that."

With that, Aries was gone, and the Doctor was left his blue box and a tattered map.