It was night time in South Island, just a quiet and boring evening with no danger going on. Living in a small run down house was the Chaotix Detective Agency ran by Vector, along with his partners Espio and Charmy. Inside their home, there were no furniture except for the wooden desk and wooden chair where Vector would always be at. The entire house was just filled with empty cardboard boxes everywhere. There was also a stack of boxes that were put together to be a couch. Vector is sitting at his desk with a bored expression, Espio is leaning on a wall with his arm folded and his eyes closed meditating and Charmy was nowhere to be found.
Vector sighed. Suddenly, a beeping sound was heard. Vector turns to see that the cup of noodles were done cooking in the microwave. "Espio, your noodles are done."
Espio opens his eyes and walks towards the microwave. "Thanks Vector." He opens the microwave and takes out the cup of noodles. Espio opens the lid with his kunai, grabs a fork and starts eating his noodles
"Where's Charmy?" Vector asks.
Charmy then pops ups from under a pile of boxes yawning loudly. He scratches his head and looks around tiredly. "Is it morning yet?"
Espio shook his head. "Nope."
Vector groaned. "Boys, we can't keep living like this. Look at us! Our house is falling apart, we barely have food to feed ourselves, we don't even have furniture! Look!" The crocodile gets up from his desk and goes to jump on the cardboard couch, crashing onto the ground. "I can't even plop on the couch because we don't have one."
"We haven't gotten work in months Vector. Our rent is way past overdue, there is no way we'll be able to pay it at this rate." Espio says.
Charmy gasps. "You mean we're going to live homeless on the streets begging for money, stealing from the garbage can, and pick fights with other hobos all for an dirty old boot because it's the only friend that we have?!" He said holding his head panicking.
Vector gets up off the floor. "We are not going down that road Charmy! There has to be someone who needs our help! Anyone!"
The telephone on the starts ringing, catching the trio's attention. "How convenient." Espio states.
Vector picks up the telephone. "Hello? GUN Commander, what can I do for you? ...There's a problem down in Central City? You need our help?! We'll be down there as soon as possible!" Vector hangs up the phone.
Charmy's eyes lit up and starts flying around excitedly. "We got work! Yahooooo! Work! Work! Work! Work! This must be how adults when they find a job after college."
"So what are the details Vector?" Espio ask.
"The commander said that he'll let us know once we get there. I'm just happy that someone needs our help! Come on boys, let's go!" Vector starts heading out of the house with Espio and Charmy following behind.
The Chaotix arrived at Central City. There were police and GUN soldiers surrounding the area and blocking off any unauthorized civilians from walking through the scene of the crime. The GUN Commander turns to see the Chaotix walking towards him.
"Chaotix. You came just in time gentlemen." GUN Commander says.
"Alright Commander, what's the problem he- AH! AH! AH! SWEET CHAOS!" Vector frantically backed away in fear. Espio and Charmy looked to see what Vector was freaking out about, and they backed away in horror as well.
In front of them was a mangled and bloody body with a hole through the person's stomach. The sight of the dead body made the trio feel sick to their stomach.
Charmy started to feel light-headed. "Oh boy...I don't feel so…" Charmy quickly ran to the nearest bush and started throwing up.
The GUN Commander nodded. "Yeah, pretty disgusting I know. Looks like somebody punched him so hard that the culprit went through his stomach. Head is a little squished, body has some tire tracks on his body, so I guess a hit and run was also in the process. This is where you boys come in. We need your elite detective skills to find the murder of this poor unnamed and unimportant character."
Vector's eyes widened and he puts his hands up. "Woah woah woah! Hold it right there Commander! I know we're detectives and all, but all we do is collect stuff and smash Eggman's robots. We don't deal with murder cases!"
"Vector is right. We're not homicide detectives. This is way out of our league Commander. Why can't you let your GUN soldiers figure this case out?" Espio ask.
"I'm going to keep it real with you. I have the most incompetent group of people working under our organization. I can't depend on my men to solve a murder case when they can't even shoot an alien that is directly in front of them. So I need someone from Sonic's group of friends to help." GUN Commander stated.
"Wait a minute? Aren't Shadow, Rouge, and Omega working for you guys?" Charmy asked.
"They are? Hmm...no need to explain to the continuity now. You guys are here, and we need you now."
Vector shook his head. "No can do Commander. This goes against our policy. We don't deal with illegal stuff. Let's go boys." The Chaotix started to walk away.
GUN Commander rubbed his chin. "I see. Well, your policy also states that you never turn down work that pays."
The Chaotix stopped in their tracks. Vector slowly turns his head. "I'm listening."
"If you're able to solve this case and capture the culprit. I will give you one hundred thousand rings."
Vector eyes widened and started spinning like a slot machine. His eyeballs became golden dollars signs and they popped out from his eyes. "ONE HUNDRED THOUSAND RINGS?!"
"Woah! That's like...uh…" Charmy started counting his fingers. "A lot of zeros behind the one!"
Vector shook the GUN Commander's hand. "You got yourself a deal!" He said with a big smile.
"Excellent. Good luck detectives."
The Gun Commander patted Vector on the back and walks off to who knows where.
Espio with his arms folded shook his head. "Vector, you do realize you just got bamboozled into taking this case right? We don't know the first thing about dealing with a murder case. How do you expect us to find the person who committed this crime?"
"Espio listen, people do stupid things for a lot of money. Money makes the world go round. We need money. I don't wanna be a hobo in the streets of Westopolis fighting over a shoe. If we can crack this case, we can buy a house. Our own house. No need to pay anyone rent." Vector says.
"Still gotta pay the government taxes though." Charmy added.
"That's besides the point. All we gotta do is crack this case and we're in the clear. We can do this as long as we stick together and be smart about our investigation." Vector states.
Espio sighs. "Fine. So where do we start first?"
"Dr. Eggman. Let's just get him out of the way, so we can progress quicker. Luckily for us, the GUN Commander left us a car we can use." Vector pointed at the red flying car. "Let's not waste any time. We got money to earn!" The crocodile wasted no time heading toward the car.
"Yes sir!" Charmy saluted and follows behind Vector.
"My ninja powers can be of good use for us. Okay, let's do it." Espio follows behind his partners.
The trio hop inside the car and started driving toward Eggman's base.
In his base located in the Scrap Brain Zone, Eggman was sitting on a chair fumbling around on his personal computer with the lights off and a blanket over his head. His teeth grinned and he snickered wildly, shimmying around in his chair. Whatever the doctor was looking at put him in a good mood. Suddenly, the Chaotix bust through Eggman's door.
Vector pointed. "Hold it right there Eggman! First off, it's too dark in here. Charmy, turn on the lights."
Charmy finds the light switch and turns on the lights. Espio and Vector's eyes widened at what they were seeing. There were a bunch of magazine and dvds of risque robots girls, a large quantity of tissue boxes and an Eggman brand lotion on the side of the desk. For all you pathetic teenagers lonely on a Friday night, you get the idea of what is going on.
Eggman slowly turns around in his seat. "I can't have one night to myself can I? You're not even Sonic, what do you three want?"
Espio and Vector just continued to stand there in silence. Charmy picked up one of the dvds.
"Back Door Robots 9. What's that about?" Charmy asked.
Eggman quickly grabs the dvd away from Charmy and throws it somewhere. "That's none of your concern boy."
Vector shook his head in disgust. "It is very clear what is going on here. You got the lotion to-"
"Moisturize your skin! Let me tell you, you definitely need it with how dry you are. The box of tissues are also there because you're sick right?" Charmy interrupted.
Eggman blessed the six year old for his naivety. He took a breath. "Yeah. I'm sick."
"More like sick in the head." Espio whispered to himself.
"Anyways, you haven't answered my question on what you fools want." Eggman says.
"We are investigating a murder case. The victims was found with a hole through his stomach and tire tracks on his body." Vector answers.
"And you came over to my base because you assumed that I did it."
"Well you are the main villain, so it would make sense that you would be the one responsible for murder." Espio says.
"Oh, so we're just profiling me now huh? Well if you must know, I've been here all day rebuilding Metal Sonic and browsing the internet. Metal can vouch for me." Eggman picks up Metal Sonic's head from the ground. "Metal, where have I been all of today?"
Metal Sonic eyes glowed showing that's turning on. "You've been here all day trying to rebuild me after Shadow destroyed me on Christmas."
Eggman nodded. "See? I have nothing to hide." He smiled proudly.
"I've also seen his browser history. He's into some really fucked up robot porn."
"And...turning off the robot." Eggman slams his fist on Metal Sonic's head and robot shuts off.
"Well if you didn't do it, I guess you're free. Come on boys, let's just get the hell out of here." Vector said rushing out of Eggman's base.
Espio shook his head in disappointment. "I can't even fathom the amount of disgust I have for you. You have my pity doctor." The chameleon leaves Eggman's base.
Charmy scratched his head confused as he followed behind Espio. "What the heck is porn?"
"You will learn when you're older Charmy." Espio responded.
The Chaotix were now back at the crime scene in Central City. Vector figured they could find any evidence they might've missed before they left out. While the trio was looking around, Ulala was walking towards them with something in her hand.
"Hey! Chaotix!" Ulala yelled.
The trio turns to Ulala. "Ulala? What are you doing here in Central City?" Vector asks.
"I was just doing my usual news report. Just as I was wrapping up, I found something on the sidewalk." Ulala shows a license plate that says "2HOP260".
Espio takes the license plate. "A license plate. That's definitely important evidence. The GUN Commander mentioned tire tracks all over the victims body."
"Yeah. I've also seen that license plate before. I might have an idea of what happened and who's responsible." Ulala says.
Espio started paying attention to Ulala, until he heard something or rather someone in his head.
"Pssst, hey Espio. You checking out Ulala?" Vector says.
"Vector?! What are you doing in my head?!"
"Cause I'm thinking the same thing you are buddy. She's pretty hot right?"
"Vector, get out of my head! I'm trying to pay attention to Ulala. Not only that you're invading my privacy."
"There's no need to hide it buddy, I mean look at her outfit. She looks great."
"I will not continue in this trivial conversation. Aren't you trying to date Vanilla anyways?"
"It's a work in progress right now, but I can still look at other women. I am a twenty year old, I can look at any woman I want."
Charmy suddenly got into Espio's head. "Hey! What are you guys talking about?!" Espio and Vector said nothing and pretended like they didn't hear Charmy. Don't you guys ignore me! I know you were talking in Espio head!" Charmy thought.
"Hey!" Ulala yelled.
The Chaotix shook their head and snapped out of their thoughts. "What?" They all replied collectively.
"I was saying that B.D Joe may be responsible, were you guys even listening to me?!" Ulala said annoyed.
"Of course we were Ms. Ulala." Vector says.
"Oh yeah? Tell me everything I just said." Ulala folded her arms.
"Well you said...uh...Espio, what do you thi-" Before Vector could finish his sentence, Espio throws up a peace sign with his hands and turns invisible. "Hey! Don't disappear on me, you darn Chameleon!" The crocodile yelled.
"Don't ask me Vector. I'm a kid, and kids don't pay attention to anything." Charmy said.
"Well, whatever you said Miss Ulala, I'm sure it wasn't super important. You did however give us a lead on B.D Joe, so we'll go discuss things with him. To the car boys!" The Chaotix hurry back toward their car. They gave one last look toward the reporter before they drive off.
Ulala shakes her head in annoyance. "Boys." She groaned rolling her eyes in annoyance.
The Chaotix were now driving around Central City looking for B.D Joe.
"It is night time in Central City, the city where crimes always takes place. Me and my partners have been driving around for five minutes searching for B.D Joe, still no leads. I'm not too worried though. Just like how crime never sleeps, the Chaotix never sleep. I will find the murderer of the unfortunate victim, if it's the last the thing I do." Vector monologues.
Espio and Charmy glance at each other confused about Vector. "What are doing Vector?" Espio ask.
"I'm monologuing. To add more emotion to the scene."
"You sound like a deranged madman."
"Reminds me of the time Vector was outside praying to a garbage can outside begging it to give you money. You said "Oh lord chicken god, please give my broke ass some money!" Charmy says.
Espio slaps Charmy in the mouth. "Charmy! Watch your language young man! You're six years old and I won't accept you saying profanity."
Charmy pouted. "Sorry, Espio."
"I was drunk okay, and very depressed. We just gotta find this B.D Joe guy and nail him. Then we'll be living rich." Vector says.
Charmy looks out the window and sees B.D Joe walking on the sidewalk. "There he is!" Charmy points out to Vector. "Let's get after him!" Charmy grabs the steering wheel and turns the wheel.
"Charmy! What are you doing?! Have you lost your mind?!" Vector yells in panic.
"Watch out! We're gonna crash!" Espio yells.
"AHHHHHHHHHHHH!" All the Chaotix started yelling in fear as they crashed into a build in front of B.D Joe.
"Woah!" B.D Joe yelled as he fell on his butt. He started breathing rapidly.
The Chaotix get out of the car groaning in pain. Vector slaps Charmy in the back of the head. "Have you lost your damn mind?! We all could've died!" Vector yells at Charmy.
Charmy starts crying. "I was just trying to help! You didn't have to hit me so hard!" He whined.
"Helping does NOT involve killing your friends!"
B.D Joe got up from the ground and dusted himself off. "Yo! What the hell is up with you guys?! You almost killed me with that damn thing!" He complained.
"You're not in a good position to talk right now Joe. You are in hot water." Vector informs him.
"What are you talking about?" B.D Joe asks.
"What are you doing here in Central City? Aren't you supposed to be in your taxi?" Espio questioned.
"I was just taking a stroll through the city that's all. As for my taxi...it's in the repair shop at the moment." B.D Joe replies.
"Well there was a murder in Downtown Central City, and we think that you were there at scene of the crime." Vector says.
"Man, I don't know anything about any crime. I just got to Central City."
"Oh yeah? Then explain why your license plate was found at the crime scene?!" Charmy says as he shows B.D Joe his license plate.
B.D Joe started to get nervous, there was no point in lying about his location anymore. "Alright. So I was at Central City earlier just dropping off my last customer. As I was starting to walk back to my taxi, I see this kid on top of it trying to spray graffiti on my hood. I ran at him trying to get him off my taxi. He jumped off my car and tripped me, making me fall inside my taxi. My car started moving on it's own. I didn't know what was going on, but I was heading towards a building. So I quickly jumped out of my taxi and let it crash."
"Someone was trying to murder you?" Vector asks.
"Sure looked like it, I found a one hundred ton weight on my gas pedal. I didn't know anything about a murder though. It probably happened right after I left." B.D Joe shrugs.
"Did you catch a glimpse of the perpetrator?" Espio asks.
"All I know is that the kid had brown hair."
"He sprayed graffiti too right? There's only one person that has brown hair and spray graffiti." Charmy says.
"Beat!" The Chaotix said in unison.
"Thanks for your help Joe, sorry for Charmy almost killing you with the car." Vector apologized.
B.D Joe shrugs. "Hey man, no worries. Now I know how citizen feel when they see me driving. I can kill somebody." From the corner of eyes, the taxi driver caught of glimpse of Beat spraying graffiti at a nearby building. He points to Beat. "Look, there he is!"
The Chaotix turn to see Beat. "Beat!" Vector yells. The trio starts running after the skater.
Beat turns around to see the Chaotix coming towards him, and they didn't look friendly. "Ahh geez, time to dip." Beat started skating away. The trio were right on his trail, there were no rails around Central City for the skater to grind on so he didn't have a faster way to escape. He had to depend solely on his speed.
Vector turns his head to Espio. "Espio, do you think you can block his path?"
Espio nods. "Understood. Leave it to me." The chameleon started speeding up and starts swinging from lamppost to lamppost. On top of a lamppost Beat was approaching, he throws five kunais in front of Beat's path to make him stop. Espio jumps out off the lamppost and lands in front of Beat. The chameleon takes one of the kunais he threw on the street and points it at Beat. "Don't move any further, unless you wish to get pierced."
Beat puts his hands up and backs away from Espio. However, he backed up into Vector who was standing right behind him. "Oh great, I'm surrounded by Sonic's weird friends. What do you guys want?"
"You got a lot of explaining to do kid. Now start talking, did you try to murder B.D Joe? Are you also responsible for the murder in Central City?" Vector questioned.
"Look, I have no idea what the hell you guys are talking about. You're not just going to start of accusing me of stuff I know nothing about. I'm just trying to spray graffiti." Beat replies.
Vector decides it's time to get tough and lifts Beat up by his shirt. "Now you listen here skater, you better-"
Beat pushes Vector, making him put him down. "Don't you put your hands on me! I didn't want to do this to you but, I gotta roast y'all. Boi! Starting with you." The skater points at Vector. "I'm an crocodile, not a alligator looking ass! You log on to tinder everyday looking for a single mom knowing they have a kid. "I can be a good stepdad" dumbass! Walking around the streets with yo fake ass gold chain, looking like macaroni art I made in kindergarten. Everytime you open your mouth, it looks like I can fly a plane in there. "
Espio walks up to Beat. "Alright, that's enough out of you."
Beat turns to Espio. "Oh I wasn't going to forget you. What are you supposed to be? Joe Musashi's fursona? Don't get me started your wannabe ninja ass. Your nose is so pointy, I can dip it in ink and write an entire book report with it. Get yo Hidden Leaf Village "I'm gonna be hokage someday" looking ass out of here. Sticking out your tongue with yo "This is how I eat pussy." stupid ass."
Charmy flies up to Beat's face. "Now you listen here buster! You're not going to talk to my friends like that! You mess with them. Then you mess with me buddy." The kept poking on the skater's chest.
Beat raised his eyebrow at Charmy, clearly not intimidated by the bee. "I don't care how old you are, you're getting roasted too. "Mom says it's turn to play the Dreamcast", looking ass. "I'm gonna tell on you!", looking ass. Nose full snot all day." Beat starts imitating how Charmy would be like if his nose was full of snot.
Vector was gritting his teeth, getting really annoyed of Beat's insult. "Are you done?! I've had just about enough of you."
"Come back when you've actual pay your rent croc head." Beat says skating away from the Chaotix.
"Why you little!" Vector was ready to charge at Beat, but Espio and Charmy holds him back.
"Keep it together Vector!" Espio says.
"Just let it go! He's not worth!" Charmy says.
While trying to hold Vector back, Espio senses something that was approaching their way. "Disperse!" He yells.
The Chaotix separate from each other, dodging a giant fist that was about to hit them. They turn to see the perpetrator trying to escape. Charmy flies over to Vector. "Throw me Vector! I'll catch him!" He says.
"Got it!" Vector grabs Charmy and throws him at the perpetrator.
Charmy sticks his arms forward. "Super bee is ready to stop you!" The bee tackles the perpetrator to the ground. Charmy gasped when he realized who he caught. "Alex Kidd?!"
Espio and Vector catches up to Charmy. "What?! It was him the whole time?!" Espio says in shock.
Alex Kidd pushes Charmy off of him. He gets up from the ground and dust himself off. "Yeah it was me."
"But why?" Charmy wondered.
"Easy. He wants to get revenge on Sonic for replacing him as SEGA's mascot. So first he tries to kill B.D Joe and frame Beat for it by spraying graffiti on his taxi. He didn't succeed, and the victim of the murder case caught him in the act. There's only one person to have a big enough hand to punch through somebody, and it had to be him." Vector said.
"I would've gotten away with it too, if it wasn't for you meddling animals! I won't let you take me to jail so easily! There's only one way you can defeat me." Alex Kidd sticks his fist out.
Charmy flies towards Alex Kidd. "Leave this to me guys. I know what he means."
Charmy and Alex Kidd just stare at each other intensely. They both raised their fist up.
"Rock. Paper. Scissors. Shoot!" They both said. Charmy picked paper while Alex Kidd picked rock.
"Darn it!" Alex Kidd yelled.
Charmy smiled triumphantly. "Get GUN over here Vector." He says.
GUN arrived at Central City and arrested Alex Kidd. The GUN Commander was with the Chaotix.
"Good job. You managed to solve the case and bring justice to Central City. I knew you wouldn't disappoint me." The Gun Commander smiled.
"It was no issue for us at all. The Chaotix always gets the job done." Vector gives a thumbs up.
"Well, a promise is a promise. Soldier, bring the hundred thousand rings for these gentlemen. They've earned it."
A GUN soldiers approaches the trio with five briefcases filled twenty thousand rings each. Vector's mouth started to water and he started breathing rapidly. He could feel his heart pounding.
"Oh yes! My favorite reward! We're rich boys! Rich!" Vector yelled excitedly. "I think...I'm gonna…" The crocodiles loses consciousness and falls on his back.
Charmy flies to Vector and starts poking his face. "Uh, Vector? You gonna be okay buddy?"
Espio walks to the GUN Soldier and takes the briefcases. "I'll take those. Don't worry about Vector, he'll be fine. Call us if you need anything Commander. Come on Charmy." The chameleon starts walking away.
Charmy follows behind Espio while struggling to drag Vector. "Coming Espio."
The Chaotix did it. They solved the case, saved the day, and got their money. Looks like they won't be becoming hobos after all!