I sit on the edge of the bed, putting my shirt back on. I feel his presence behind me. He places a hand on my shoulder, pulling the fabric out of the way and kisses my shoulder. Disgusted, I roll my shoulder to get him to stop. His kisses travel up to the hollow of my neck. I was just about to tell him that his time was up and that he knows where to send the money to, he was a regular after all. But before I have the chance to, he roughly places his hands on both of my shoulders, keeping me from getting up, and puts his lips against my earlobe.
"I expect to see you again soon." The Capitol man says in a deep low voice that sends chills down my spine. Releasing me, I merely nod and get up, I just want to get out of this mans house.
I walk through the front door and find a car waiting for me to take me back to where I'm staying: President Snow's mansion. I hate being there, and I hate doing this, all I want is to be with Peeta. Fortunately for me, I get to leave tonight and go back home to see my family, I don't get to see them all that much, and its all Snow's fault.
After the Victory Tour, Snow, I guess as a punishment for my actions in the Games, makes me come to the Capitol every other month to sell me. At first I refused, but he said that he would kill everyone I love so I did it. I haven't told them, mostly because I don't want someone to know what I have to do, I won't put that burden on them, and because I'm afraid of what Snow would do if they found out. Peeta has his suspicions but I will never tell him because I don't want him to be as disgusted with me as I am about myself. I don't know what I would do if I lost him, so no, I will never tell.
The driver goes through the gate and I am escorted by guards inside where I am then led up to my room. When we reach my door the guards take there place. I always have guards placed at my door, when I go anywhere in the Capitol I always have the guards by my side, when ever I go anywhere in this mansion I am escorted by guards, I can't even go to the bathroom with out a guard standing outside the door. I think Snow is afraid that I will escape but I'm not stupid to do that because I know what will happen if I do.
I open the door and find Snow sitting in a chair in the corner of the room. For the few months that I have been doing this, he has never done this. I'm scared as to what he wants.
"Miss Everdeen. I was wondering when you would show up." He says as he stands up and walks over to me. I just stand there. "You see, I wanted to bid you goodbye since this will be the last time you will be here for the next few months, what with the Quell and everything. But I just want to mention that I will be watching over the Districts just to keep things safe." And with that, he walks out of the room. I shut the door behind him. This was a message. It means that even though I am home and away from the Capitol, that he will be watching me. It means that I have to be extra careful.
…
I am back home in District 12. God, it feels so good to be back! It feels good knowing that they are safe, and I'm doing everything in my power to keep it that way. Tonight I had dinner with my family and I was glad that Peeta was there. Ever since my games, all three of them had grown closer together. I guess they comforted each other, but regardless, its wonderful. I remember when Peeta and I had first started our relationship, I was terrified about how my mom would respond. When we finally told her, all she said was that she thought I was a little to young for a boyfriend but that if it were going to be any boy, she was glad that it was Peeta. And now, my mom considered Peeta to be apart of this family, I remember when she had told me that just a month ago, and I started crying. That was actually a moment after the Games when I actually felt pure joy, so that memory will always be with me.
Right now Peeta and I are just lying out on the grass in the meadow. We haven't just been with each other like this in months, and it feels so right. I have my head on his chest and he is playing with my braid. I like the silence, its comfortable.
"So how was your trip?" He asks, breaking the silence. He always asks this question, knowing full well that it was not a good trip but asking so that I will open up to him.
"Fine." I say the usual 'fine' and always see the look of sadness in his eyes that go away quickly for my benefit but I still see it and it breaks my heart. If only he knew that it was to protect him and I don't want him to be disgusted with me. I see the look on his face and I can tell that he is not going to just drop it this time.
"Katniss, why won't you tell me? Do you think I'll be ashamed of you. Katniss, you know I have my suspicions. What ever it is, I know that it is more than fine. I see the way you look when you come back, you look like the life has been taken out of you. Katniss please, I just want to help." I sit up and look down on him and see his pleading eyes. He says he has his suspicions, what does he think goes on there?
"What are your suspicions?" I ask, hesitant to what he'll say.
"I talked to Haymitch, he told me what was probably happening to you, although he wasn't certain." He looks at me somber look. "Katniss, I want to protect you," He bends down and kisses me. "But you just have to tell me what it is you need protecting from." I want to tell you, I want to tell you so bad, but I'm too afraid that you'll get hurt or be ashamed of me.
"You probably won't want to be with me anymore once you find out. You'll probably be repulsed by the things I've been forced to do."
"Katniss, please. You know I won't leave you right?" I look up into his pleading eyes and I can't say no to him anymore. He deserves to know the truth, no matter what happens in the end.
"It started a week after the Victory Tour. Snow payed me a visit. He told me that he was going t-to..." I look down, unable to say the words. The tears start to well up in my eyes. I won't cry! I tell myself. But its to late, the tears start streaming down my cheeks. Peeta gathers me in his arms and starts rocking me back and forth. Whispering words of comfort. I hate crying in front of people, but with Peeta...it's different, I feel as though I can do anything without being judged. Enough, stop crying. I look up at him and he looks down at me with sad eyes. I can't stop now. I've got to finish it.
"He told me that he was going to sell me." I finally get the words out. I don't even look up at him, I can't see the look on his face. "At first I refused, he told me that if I didn't do it, that he would kill everyone I loved so, I did it. A few weeks later I was shipped off to the Capitol. I stayed in Snow's mansion, and I have every time I went. I remember that they had this auction w-when I first got there." I can feel the tears burning in my eyes again, but I won't let them fall. "In the auction the highest bidder, in the end got to...got to." I give an exasperated sigh. "Got to take away my virginity!" I finally force the words out. And now I can't stop talking about one of the most humiliating moments of my life, I've kept it in too long, cried about it for too many nights. "It was a private auction, so no cameras. I stood up there naked while men shouted out different amounts of money. In the end the highest bidder got to take me home with him for the night. It was awful, he took something precious away from me that night, and that same man and many others have done worse things than that to me over the past few months. That's why I've been gone." I finally look up and see a face full of hatred. Great, now he hates me, he wants nothing to do with me. "If you're going to say how much you hate me and are repulsed by me, and that you're going to leave me. You might as well do it now." I say. He lifts his hand and brushes away tears that have unknowingly cascaded down my face.
"I don't hate you, no I hate the man who has been doing this to you. Katniss I want nothing more than to take those memories away from you and I want nothing more than to stop it from happening anymore. I love you Katniss, and it breaks my heart to hear this and to know what those men are doing to you." Did he just say that he loves me? Do I love him? Why did I just ask myself that question? Of course I love him. I don't deserve him, I never will deserve him.
"I love you too." I say barely audible.
"Say it again." He says, I'm surprised that he actually heard it. I look up and see his face that was once full of hatred and sadness to a face full of joy.
"I love you Peeta." And with that he grabs my face in his hands and kisses me hard on the mouth. After a moment he breaks away and hugs me and he whispers in my ear,
"I love you too, Katniss...I love you too."
A/N: Hey everyone, so this is a new fanfic that I'm writing, and I hoped that you liked it. Just to clarify a few things if you didn't gather it from the story.
Only Katniss was in the games, not Peeta. She volunteered for Prim.
Katniss and Peeta were together before her games.
Katniss did do something that made Snow very angry and caused people to think about rebelling just like in the books but it is something different obviously. And all that happened in her games will be mentioned throughout the story periodically.
Katniss is just like Finnick in a way, she is a prostitute.
Things that I just want you to know.
All the characters will be mentioned in the story, I just don't know when, I haven't thought that far ahead.
This story is different than what it is like in the books, its not following the same sequence of events and the plot is different in many ways.
I really hope you keep reading and I should be uploading very soon! Tell me how I'm doing please, I love reading reviews! Bye guys!