The Discovery

Gwen wasn't sure when she first decided that the world was completely, utterly mad.

It may have been when Morgana first told her she suspected her nightmares told the future. Or maybe it was when she'd seen her first execution. Maybe it was when her own father was taken from her. Maybe it was when the Future King Arthur was nearly taken from Camelot.

Or perhaps it was right then, when Morgana put Arthur in a headlock. Arthur was grunting and trying to remove her without doing any damage because the last time this happened, they were twelve, Morgana got a cut lip, and Arthur had been punished with month-long stable duty for daring to harm the lady of the castle. Gwen was present for that argument nearly ten years ago, and she knew that any intervention in this would just land her in trouble as well.

So.

She ducked out of the chamber before there was any bloodshed to guarantee her plausible deniability, in case she was pulled forward again by an enraged Uther. As an afterthought, she poked an arm back in to remove Arthur's sword from the room, just in case the two of them were tempted. Then she went looking for Gaius, to warn him of the potential incoming patients. However, when she opened the door to Gaius's chambers, it was empty.

Curious as to where Gaius would be in the middle of the day, she let herself in and looked around. Gwen had to wrap her hands around the hilt of Arthur's sword, to prevent herself from touching anything. Sometimes it was just too hard to resist. Gaius's work was always so fascinating to her, and she wished she had the time to sit with him and learn more. He was always happy to indulge when they both had the time, but lately it just wasn't meant to be.

Which was why it was so strange for him not to be around. She sighed and started to leave when she noticed black smoke coming from Merlin's bedroom.

"Oh!" she cried, and ran up the steps. Not bothering to knock, Gwen burst into the room.

The room was filled with black smoke. She grabbed a blanket off the floor, still managing to wonder how much of a pig Merlin was to leave it on the floor in the first place, and started to wave it around, looking for the source of the fire. Then, suddenly...

"EEEEEEIIII!!!" A large, toothy face shot out from the midst of the dark smoke and screamed shrilly.

"AHH!" Gwen screamed back and instinctively swung Arthur's sword at the monster, but it seemed that it was made entirely of smoke. The sword sliced through the thick air harmlessly and the smoke monster swirled around behind her. She turned to take another swing at it, when she heard a very familiar voice call out her name.

"Gwen!?"

"Merlin!?"

All of a sudden, the monster's shrieking stopped. It closed its mouth and disappeared into the dark smog. It was only then that Gwen realized she wasn't coughing. There were no acrid fumes burning at her nose and lungs, and her eyes weren't watering. It wasn't real smoke.

The room began to clear and Gwen turned around again, just in time to see the last of the smoke disappear...into Merlin's hands.

Gwen's jaw dropped. Merlin was sitting on his bed, horrified.

"W-w-what are you doing here?!"

Her mouth was wide open, but no words were coming out. She was staring at him, and still holding out Arthur's sword in an intimidating battle stance that only a blacksmith's daughter would be able to pull off.

"G-Gwen...?" Merlin held both of his hands up, trying his best not to look threatening. "Gwen, I...I can explain."

"You...that smoke...that monster...?" she managed to whisper. The sword shook in her hands.

"It isn't what it looks like," Merlin said quickly.

"You weren't just using magic?"

"...Okay, it's what it looks like, but Gwen, hear me out - " He started to get up from his bed.

"No, no, wait," Gwen said, trying to sound brave despite the hesitation in her voice. She waved the sword at him.

"Gwen, you know I would never hurt you!" Merlin said, his hands still up.

"I know...I don't know...I...don't..." Gwen shook her head, trying to clear her head, but it seemed like it was filled with that thick, dark smoke. "Look, I'm scared and I'm holding a sword so maybe its best you stay put for now and...and talk to me."

"Fair enough," Merlin sat obediently.

"So...you can do magic."

"Yes."

"You've been studying it this whole time?"

"Sort of. When I have time. I was born with most of it."

"Born...with magic?"

"Yeah. That happens sometimes."

Gwen bit her lip. She recalled how Morgana used to have her oddly prophetic dreams even when they were young. "I see."

Merlin nodded slowly, casting long, nervous glances at the sword. "Er...I'd also like to point out that whenever I used magic, it was for good. Only for good."

"But...but I just saw you using dark magic," Gwen accused. She hated to say it, to believe that Merlin was a dark sorcerer, but she couldn't deny what she had seen. If she was right, and she had just seen an evil monster being conjured by her best friend, it would break her already fragile heart completely to pieces. She couldn't lose another person in her life, and she hoped with all left in her that she was wrong. That Merlin would prove her wrong.

"It wasn't dark magic," Merlin explained.

Well, she had been hoping for a bit more than that.

"Black smoke!? Monster?!" Gwen reminded him shrilly.

"Okay, I know it looks bad - "

"It looks very, very bad, Merlin!"

"No, no, it wasn't! That was just a screen. The monster wasn't a monster, it just comes with the spell," Merlin pushed a big, old book on his bed forward with his toe. "You can read it yourself. Well...I suppose you couldn't, its in a different language, but it's meant to scare away attackers, not hurt anyone. You were swinging that sword at it, so I guess it thought you were an attacker and tried to ward you off. I swear there was no black magic involved. Except, well, I suppose in the literal color sense, there was - "

"Merlin."

"Yes, sorry, I know its crazy to think about. I was just practicing and I thought Gaius was out there looking out for me, but apparently he isn't, even though he was supposed to be, though to be fair I didn't tell him I was practicing - "

"Merlin, shut up for just a second," Gwen breathed.

"Oh."

"No, I'm sorry. Sorry. It's just," she made a motion with her hand. "A lot to take in. I'm trying to, you know. Process it."

"Right. Uh, yeah, go right ahead," Merlin said, easing himself back on the bed and further away from the tip of the sword.

Gwen tried to wrap her head around it all. Merlin. Okay. She liked Merlin. Merlin can do magic. All right, she wasn't quite sure how she felt about that, but she did still like Merlin. Merlin is not an evil sorcerer bent on the destruction of Camelot. That was pretty excellent; she definitely liked that. He used his magic for good...

"You said you've used your spells for good," Gwen spoke up suddenly. Merlin raised his eyebrows.

"Yes, I have. Remember the Afanc?"

"Morgana said Arthur killed it. She was there."

"So was I."

"Arthur used his torch and - "

"A fortuitous gust of wind blew in?" Merlin guessed.

"Well, yes..."

"And remember Ealdor?" he pressed. "Recall any fortuitous gusts of wind then, as well?"

Gwen gaped. "That was you?!"

"It's one of my favorite tricks," Merlin grinned and pointed a finger at her. A small puff of air blew her hair back. She jerked in surprise.

"But Will - "

"Knew my secret," Merlin said quietly. "And took it to his grave."

Gwen bit her lip. "I'm sorry. He must truly have been a good friend to you."

"He was," Merlin agreed. "The best friend a man could have. A bit like you, actually. Just a little more of a prat and a lot less pretty."

Gwen was standing there, pointing a sword at a sorcerer, and she still managed to blush furiously.

"I, er, I-I only meant - " Merlin stammered.

"It's okay," she said quickly.

"Not-not that you aren't - "

"It's okay, Merlin," Gwen said again, begging for him to drop the subject before her ears heated up so much that they melted off.

"Uh, right." he moved his moved his jaw around awkwardly, trying to think of a way for this not to be so uncomfortable. "Anyway. Yes. I mostly use my magic to help Arthur."

Merlin was telling the truth. She didn't need to have any magical mind-reading powers to know that. His sincerity, his awkwardness, his blatant Merlin-ness was all the proof she needed. And even if he'd said nothing, she'd have known it was true. The man was pretty much incapable of letting bad things happen. That was what had drawn her to him that first day.

"You're always with him when he does all those brave things," Gwen realized. "The Afanc, the Griffin, even those mysterious illnesses and famines we've had. I suspect you had something to do with taking care of them?"

"Well, it's really Arthur that does it," Merlin said humbly. "I just do some...background stuff."

"Like saving his life?"

"Yeah, little things like that," Merlin smiled. Gwen smiled as well. She stood there silently, just taking it all in while he waited patiently for her to speak again. He really was remarkable. Gwen had known it since the first time she laid eyes on him, but she just didn't know the extent of it until just then. It was because of this one, skinny, big-eared boy that Camelot still stood. How much did she owe him? How much did everyone owe him?

"You would always tell me strange, cryptic things and then run off without any explanation," she said, breaking the silence. "Really, I should have known all along."

"I would have preferred you didn't," Merlin admitted. "Life is always a little more dangerous when you're close to me."

"Well, it's a little late for that, then, isn't it?" Gwen shrugged. "Merlin, you can trust me. I won't say a word to anyone."

"I know," he smiled again. "I never had to ask you. I just know."

"What, can you read my mind as well?" Gwen joked. Then she realized that maybe it wasn't that much of a joke. For all she knew, it was true. In which case, she had many, many things to be embarrassed about since that day she met him in the stocks. Her forehead wrinkled in worry.

"Oh, yeah," Merlin laughed. He pressed his fingers to his temples and made a silly face, noticing how Gwen's had changed and she now looked distressed about something. "Right now you are thinking...that I'm a prat for not telling you in the first place? And being so reckless with my magic?"

Gwen's fear at the prospect of Merlin knowing what she'd been thinking in their early days changed to relief when she realized he couldn't actually read minds. Then it quickly changed again, to anger.

"That's true!" she cried. "You're my best friend, Merlin! How could you keep this from me?! You say you trust me, yet you - !"

Merlin, having not expected his innocent joke to backfire as it apparently had, recoiled. She was unconsciously waving the sword around again. "Gwen, you are one of the very few people I trust in the whole world!"

"Then why?!"

"It's for your safety," Merlin insisted. "I used magic to cure your father from that plague, and it almost got you killed!"

Gwen stared at him. "You put the poultice under my father's pillow?"

"Yes, and it worked, but I couldn't sleep knowing that I nearly had you beheaded! You see? Magic is dangerous, and I couldn't put you in that position again!"

Gwen gripped the sword tightly. "Merlin, do you not realize that if you had just told me you were putting the poultice under his pillow, I could have just gotten rid of it the next morning and avoided the whole dungeon and execution thing all together?"

Merlin's mouth opened and closed noiselessly. He blinked. "Uh. Well, I suppose...but...okay that was a bad example."

"A little bit," she said, keeping her not-often-used temper in check.

"There are loads of other times when I faced death, and knowing you..." Merlin said carefully, not wanting to offend the girl holding the sword but trying to make a point, all the same. "...you'd feel the very ill-advised need to run and help me."

"Well, of course I would, Merlin! I love you!" Gwen stopped and backtracked. "I mean, in a friend sense - "

"Of-of course."

" - entirely platonic - "

"Platonic. Yes," Merlin nodded awkwardly. "My point was, I can't let you help me with those kinds of things. I wouldn't be able to live with myself if you got eaten by Griffins or burned to death by evil physicians or killed by undead knights or kidnapped by lake-people or poisoned by really old but very attractive and spry-looking witches - "

"I get it, Merlin," Gwen stopped him. At that point, she didn't even want to ask. "But as your best friend, I don't want any of those...unfortunate...things to happen to you, either."

"You can't help that," he sighed. "It is my destiny to help Arthur become a great king. I have no choice."

"You always have a choice," she told him sagely. "Sometimes its just easier to think that you don't."

Merlin rolled his eyes, "Did Gaius say that to you?"

"Actually, I said it to him," Gwen said. "That day he left when one of your 'evil physicians' tried to kill Uther. And you'll recall that he came back?"

"That he did," Merlin laughed. "It seems you've a way with words, Guinevere."

"Then you should listen to me," she said loftily.

"But you're...you're saying one of my choices is to stop using my powers to help Camelot?" he frowned. "That's really not a choice."

"No, of course not," Gwen shook her head. "You choice is whether or not to accept help. Your destiny is to help Arthur. Fine. Arthur's destiny is to become a great king. I approve. But what's mine?"

Merlin grinned sheepishly. "To...not be eaten by Griffins or burned to death by evil phys - "

"Merlin," Gwen put her foot down firmly. "I'm helping you. You're to confide in me when something goes on, as I suspect you do with Gaius since you thought he was covering you today. I want to be included. It's my kingdom too, and if I can fight for it, I will. Why do you get to risk your life for Camelot and I don't?

"I...I suppose that makes sense," Merlin smirked. "You're awfully authoritative when you want to be. Maybe your destiny is to be a Queen."

"Oh, be quiet, Merlin," she grinned in spite of herself. "Besides, you need my help. You're obviously not very good at keeping your secret by yourself."

"This was just one time," he said contrarily.

"One time is all it takes for you to get yourself killed!" Gwen pointed out, angry again. "I could have just as easily been Uther!"

"Okay, okay, Gwen! Please, would you put the sword down? Any more of that and I'll wet my trousers, I swear!"

"Oh, sorry," Gwen finally put Arthur's sword down.

"It's all right," Merlin said, much more at ease now. "So...so just to be clear. You're fully aware that any involvement in me and my...er, magical duties, may very well involve pain, misery, suffering, torture, and/or death, dismemberment, and potential for a lot of general maiming?"

"Yes."

"And that my only wish is that you stay safe."

"Likewise," Gwen said. "And since it's clear that you won't be staying safe, even though I wish it, I propose a compromise. We both just hang our safety and do what needs to be done."

Merlin laughed. "The world always seems much simpler when you speak, Gwen. You really need to look into that Queen thing. Go find yourself a nice little kingdom."

"Hush up, Merlin," Gwen rolled her eyes. Then she thought of something and looked at him questioningly. "Merlin, do you think...?"

"What?"

"Do you think you could show me a few more tricks? I've never really seen any good or fun magic before. It's been banned all my life." She twiddled her thumbs shyly. "I'd understand if you don't want to, I mean, I'd block the door of course, in case anyone else barges in, but - "

Merlin silenced her and got up to perform a spectacular show of magic for his best friend.

- - - - - - - - - -

Gaius stormed into the chamber, tugging along an angry Prince Arthur.

"She bit me!" he cried.

"You tried to hurt her," Gaius replied gruffly.

"She had me in a headlock!"

Gaius gave him a look. "Am I to believe a maiden like Morgana was successful in physically disabled you?"

"I – well – she - !"

"Yes, I was!" Morgana called from where she was ordered to wait outside in the corridor.

"What were you fighting about, anyway?"

"I – well – she - !"

"Arthur, your father will want a full explanation of your injuries and I intend to tell him the truth."

Arthur sighed. "I may have tracked a bit of mud on her dress."

"By accident?"

"She teased me in front of the other knights!"

"He called me air-headed!" Morgana called again

"Lady Morgana, please be patient and wait your turn, I'll be done with the Prince in a minute," Gaius sighed and shut the door to prevent another battle. It was then that noticed Merlin and Gwen standing there, the picture of innocence Gwen held up a cup if what he supposed was tea. "Oh. Hello. Did you need something? I'm sorry I was away, a servant ran in here earlier warning me of a fight about to break out between these two."

He gave Arthur another look and he grumbled defiantly.

"We're fine," Gwen said, somewhat hurriedly and put the cup down. Gaius noticed that it was empty, as was the kettle, which was nowhere near the burner. He shot Merlin and Gwen a suspicious look.

"I'll...I'll go tend to my lady." She rushed outside, where Morgana immediately began a long, exaggerating retelling of her altercation with Arthur.

"She's lying!" Arthur yelled through the door. Then, "What's my sword doing here?"

Merlin looked at it, leaning against the steps. "Uh. You left it here?"

"No, you probably did," Arthur accused.

"Oh. That's right, sire. I'm sorry."

Arthur grumbled and Gaius raised his famously expressive eyebrow at Merlin.

"We'll talk later," Merlin said, grinning widely. He climbed the stairs back to his room and closed the door.